Punch (9.1845)

74

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

ANECDOTES OF ACTORS.

by one wbo has whistled at the wins.

Anecdotes of Actors are the cacoethes at present with
almost all the Magazines, we have, at great expense,
collected the following from a stage-doorkeeper, who,
having retired from the portico of public life, has given
us permission to state, he received them from the
copyist of the Grecian Saloon, to whom they had been
told in confidence by a bill-of-the-play woman of the last
century, who had them direct from the above gentle-
man (a deceased call-boy, candle-snuffer, and scene-
shifter,) during his memorable engagement at the
Globe Theatre. We can assure our readers that not
one of 'them has ever been published before.

Garrick used to drink nothing, when he was acting,
but water-gruel. His Romeo averaged four pints ; but
for the curse in King Lear, I have known him to take
as many as three quarts in one evening. When he
performed the " Walking Gentleman," however, he
preferred a glass of ginger-beer with the white of an
egg in it.

Dicky Stone was the first to dress the " fools " in their
present costume. Before his time, the fools were always
dressed like courtiers ; but the Earl of Essex having
complained, Elizabeth got her "faithful Commons" to
pass a law for the alteration.

An actor of the name of Smith had a celebrated dog,
called " Towser." They performed once in a piece
entitled, The Dog of Deal, or Dover—I forget which—
in which the dog had to spring at Smith's throat,
Smith being a murderer. Harry Sawyer, however,
was in a private box the first night; and, just as the
dog was making the fatal spring, he threw on the stage
a large piece of cat's-meat : the consequence was,
Towser rushed immediately to the tempting morsel,
and nothing would induce him to leave it to revenge
his master's murder. An apology was made for the
dog, but all to no purpose ; the piece was unequivocally
condemned,

Grimaldi was anything but funny off the stage. I
have seen him at the wing so affected at George Barn-
well, that he has been obliged frequently to chalk his
cheeks three times in the same evening, on account of
the tears washing all the paint off. His " Here we
are !" never failed to make George the Third laugh.
The merry monarch would say—" Yes ; here we are !
—very true !—we are here ! Capital !—Yes : here we are ! Ha ! ha !"—and he would go on so
for five minutes, till something else was said—" Somebody coming !" perhaps,—which he would
repeat in the same facetious way, loud enough for the whole house to hear him.

Dandy Smith used to wear shirt-collars made out of letter-paper. Lord Byron was one night
behind the scenes asking for an order, but nobody had any paper on which to write one. Smith
immediately pulled out, with great presence of mind, one side of his collar ; and, filling it up, presented
it to Lord Byron, saying, u Allow me, my lord, to invest you with the Collar of the 0. P.
Order."

Harry Simpson never would take any medicine; and his medical man was often obliged to
resort to some stratagem to impose a dose upon hi™. There is a piece,—I do not recollect the
name,—in which the hero is sentenced in prison to drink a cup of poison. Harry Simpson was
playing this character one night, and had given directions to have it filled with port wine ; but what
was his horror, when he came to drink it, to find it contained a dose of senna I He could not throw
it away, as he had to hold the goblet upside down, to show his persecutors he had drained every
drop of it. Simpson drank the medicine with the slowness of a poisoned martyr ; but he never
forgave his medical man this trick, as was fully proved at his death, for he died without paying
him his bill.

Astley was the first to originate jokes by the Clown in the ring. The celebrated conundrum of
** When is a door not a door!" made its d/but under his management; and was so popular, that
places for the boxes were sold like stock on the Royal Exchange, and fetched a higher premium

than any of the funds. A private box for
the Amphitheatre was considered at that
time the most valuable wedding-present in
a lady's trousseau.

Betterton had the gift of a very beautiful
whistle. He would take a piece of wood, and
whistle upon it with such intense feeling and
melody, that a whole theatre has imagined he
was playing upon the flute. He has often
played in this way in the orchestra when the
flute has been suddenly indisposed. When
he was a strolling player, he has lived for
days upon his whistle, paying his expenses,
with nothing else, from town to town. The
recollection of his shake is still cherished in
many of our northern counties.

Mrs. Hubbard (the original "Old Maid"
in Have a Cap and Set a Cap) was a very
great favourite in pathetic parts ; as she was
known to cry more naturally than anybody
else. The secret of this was never known
till her death, when there was found a be-
quest in her will of ten pounds, to be divided
in onions every Christmas-Day amongst poor
undertakers out of prison.

An elephant was never introduced on the
English stage till the production of Blue
Beard. This is a positive fact; for Fawcett
made his first appearance, I recollect, in one
of its hind legs. He was so nervous at the
time, that in going over one of the traps it
gave way, and Fawcett and his companion
leg were precipitated through it. The result
was that Blue Beard and his black attendant
were brought to the ground; and the two
front legs of the elephant were seen lifted
up in the air kicking away most violently,
whilst the two hind legs, with Fawcett in
one of them, were kicking no less violently
under the stage. The curtain was obliged to-
be dropped before Fawcett, or the elephant,
could resume his natural footing. He after-
wards attempted to put down elephants when
he was stage-manager, but they were always
too strong for him.

Mrs. Billington had ninety wigs. They
were of all colours, and of all ages. She was
offered as much as two thousand pounds for
them by Talma, who wanted to present them
to Napoleon ; but she refused the offer, as
she was determined they should not go out of
the country. She kept her word ; for she
bequeathed them to the British Museum,
where they may still be seen on referring to
the head of " Fossils."

Quin was a very great gourmand. He
would have his mustard from Durham ; and
his salt was sent to him regularly from
Epsom. A box, hermetically sealed, was left
at the stage-door for him every morning
from Richmond, full of Maids of Honour ;
and he never travelled without carrying be-
hind his carriage a tank of sea-water, made
in the shape of a trunk, filled with shrimps
or periwinkles. When he was ill, he would
touch nothing but a Pope's-eye boiled in
ketchup.

I recollect Charles the Second coming
incog, to the King's Theatre, to see Nell
Gwynne act Policotia in Not such a Fool
as He Looks. Unfortunately, in those days,
there was no Free List; and the King had
not sufficient money about him to pay for a
seat in the gallery, much less in the boxes.
The consequence was, he was obliged to send
Buckingham to a pawnbroker's with his hat
and cloak; and, with the money that waa
advanced upon them, he paid for his own
and his friend's admission. Nobody would
have known anything about this, only a
Welch gentleman, happening to hiss Neli
when she was dancing, between the acts, the
Highland Fling, Charles picked a quarrel
with him ; and, in the heat of passion, struck
him. Cards were instantly exchanged ; but