Punch (10.1846)

164

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

THE POST OFFICE DELAYS.

ost - Office arrangements
are getting slower and
slower every day, while
everything else is getting
on at railroad pace. Where

manifest himself very
speedily, we will take out
a search-warrant and
search the Post-Office to
see what has become of
him ? Have they smo-
thered him in the day-
mail, or pelted him to
death with morning news-
papers ? A few days ago
the mail-carts did not
leave the yard of the Post
Office until half-past nine
at night — an hour at
iQ^S^j L JjfflP^^^^^^, which some of them ought

to have been at the end or
their respective journeys.
If the Post Office people
can't manage the concern,
let them give it up as a
bad job, and let them
evacuate St. Martin's-le-

great detriment of the
commercial and general
community. By some
shocking mismanagement
the letters to the nearest places are the last delivered. As to
Brighton, we have given it up, and never attempt direct communi-
cation with that place, but always send our letters through a respect-
able firm in Liverpool. We find that by adopting this course, we save
about an hour; for letters directed immediately to Brighton, are
allowed to lie for nearly four-and-twenty hours in repose ; in order, we
presume, to allow them to take breath before starting off by the quick
train, or to recover their breath after having arrived by it.

We are happy to announce increased facilities in the Post-Office
communication between London and Kensington. These places can
now be corresponded with nearly three times in two days ; so that a
Kensington merchant, writing to his London agent on Monday, may
get an answer, in some cases, the next morning. This is a move in
the right direction, and we thank the Earl of St. Germans
accordingly.

PUNCH'S POLITICAL DICTIONARY.

Game Laws. Game, according to law, includes hares, pheasants,
and a few others ; but there is an old case of a hackney-coach horse
who died game, or, at all events, carried out the gallant resolve of'
Macbeth, to "die with harness on his back." No person can kill game
! without a certificate, which proves that he is an individual of " some

wa7toL It yTZ t mark;" but he is nevertheless often Yevy wide of the mark 011 tnese

. , . . " ,. / J? , occasions. If the animals shot at were aware of this provision for their
rights m no timer—which, ., .. . , ,, . r

bv the way. is a very con- security> tue7 would have the right to call upon the sportsman to pro-
venient date on which to ! duce ^s certificate before proceeding to make game of them. A cer-
rnake a promise fall due ; I tiflcate must be taken out annually, and expires in July ; but if a
for no time never comes ! Qare were shot on the last day of that month, and not to expire untd
at all. Where is the Post- ! August, the certificate having expired before the hare, a very nice
master-General? we again i question would arise as to the legality of killing him. The landlord
ask ; for if he does not j who lets his land, usually reserves the right of killing the game, the

tenant having the privilege of feeding it. It has been said by Coke,
that the landlord has all the best of the game, which is, for the tenant,
a very losing one. The laws against poaching are very severe, and
extend even to the protection of the eggs of birds of game ; so
that poaching an egg is highly criminal. The preserving of game is
carried to an extent that is often destructive to the tenant : he is not
allowed to regard self-preservation as the first law of nature, for game
preservation is a paramount obligation.

Gaming, ok Gambling. A vice declared illegal by an act of the
legislature, but practised by many an act of the legislators in their
private capacity. Gambling was illegal by the Roman law, but ath-
letic exercises might be played at for money ; and Caesar's attempted
achievement of swimming across the Tiber, when he exclaimed,
" Help me, Cassius, or I sink!" was probably a bet between those two
noble Romans.

Gahtee, Order of the. The most ancient and illustrious Order of
Knighthood, founded by Edward III. on the occasion of the Countess
of Salisbury's stocking having fallen about her heels at a ball, when
the King picked up a piece of blue ribbon—worn by the Countess
before Indian rubber came into use—amid the laughter of his courtiers.
Grand at once, instead of*] His Majesty merely replied, Honl soit qui mal y pense, which became
holding the place to the | the motto of the Order. There are twenty-five knights, besides the

sovereign, together with about fifteen extra knights, who are princes
or illustrious foreigners. Henry VIII., who had, like another royal
prince of the present day, a great taste for tailoring, altered the dress
very materially. Charles EL, another royal tailor, who was also a
bit of a hatter, put a feather in the cap, which is nearly the only
feather in the cap of this mountebank monarch. Royal Garters appear
to be rather expensive, and must be quoted at £878 a pair, for it
costs £439 to be invested with a single one.

THE LAW OF RAILWAYS.

The beautiful uncertainty of the law was never better illustrated
than by the delicious ambiguity that prevails with reference to actions
on the subject of railway liabilities. Every case that comes before a
jury, if the defendant is charged with any liability on account of any
railway, is sure to terminate in a verdict for the plaintiff. A provi-
sional committee-man can recover a deposit from an allottee to-day,
and an allottee may recover it back again from the provisional com-
mittee-man to-morrow. The judges seem to have adopted the old Court
of Requests principle of " How will you pay it ? " in reference to all
claims made upon any person in respect to any railway. Every one is
declared to be liable to every one else ; but it seems to be, at the same
time, perfectly understood that every verdict will be set aside, as a
matter of course, no matter which way it happens to be, or what prin-
ciple it proceeds upon. Any one may have a verdict, to any amount,
upon any ground whatever, provided his demand arises out of some-
thing connected with a railway. The lawyers have hitherto been the
persons to profit by railway speculation, and it seems they are likely
to continue so; for while verdicts are being allotted to all who take the
trouble to ask for them at the hands of a jury, there will naturally be
a strong and general desire to litigate.

"FOOD FOR POWDER."

It would seem that recruiting went on but slackly in some of the
provinces ; and therefore the sergeant, like the play-house manager
when business falls off, has had recourse to novel and startling effects.
In the Blackburn Mercury we read of a leash of " dashing sergeants "
with half a regiment of ribanded privates parading the streets, with a
clanging band to catch the imwary. In some instances (names are
given,) the man-trapping shilling has been craftily sneaked into the
hand of the Arcadian, who, when he discovered that he was sold, flung
down the coin, and appealed to the Bench.

Now, Glory is a splendid goddess, no doubt, though she does lay on
the rouge (to hide her scars) a little thick. Nevertheless, let her make
her conquest of the manly heart by the simple beauty of her looks—by
the sweet simplicity of her words—otherwise, Glory loses the purity of
her reputation, and—false one as she is !—is no better than a Dalilah.

Honour to Cobden.

When Sir Robert Peel shall have safely effected a repeal of the
Corn-Laws, we hope that he will not forget to assign glory where
glory is due ; and that whilst he is mindful of our Indian triumphs, he
will not overlook those achieved in England under the banners of Free
Trade. We expect, therefore, that he will move a vote of thanks to
Mr. Cobden and his gallant League, for those brilliant successes in
the war against the Monopolists ; and we think the resolution might
as well include Punch.

sibthorpe's very worst.

When is a beggar like one of our Indian enemy ?
When he's a Sikh in arms {a-seeking alms).