Punch (12.1847)

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

195

PUNCH'S SONGS FOR THE (THAMES) NAVY.

It is seldom that a storm on the Thames has been described with all
that poetic rigour of which it is susceptible. It is true that the river
is not often tossed by those terrific tornadoes which are felt in some
parts of our hemisphere ; but the Reach of Chelsea is a miniature Bay
of Biscay, in its way, in windy weather. We have known the time
when we have been obliged to scud in a lee-scupper close to the shore,
all the way from Vauxhall to Battersea Bridge, and at last been com-
pelled to throw the binnacle overboard, and briDg the boiler quite taut
under main-gallant reelings. Nautical men will appreciate the diffi-
culty of the position we have described, though landsmen may not
know exactly what to make of it. The following naval song will
perhaps help the general reader to an understanding of the peculiar
peril of a vessel in such extraordinary bearings. On more than one
occasion have we been under the necessity of personally hauling the
spanker jib-boom rijht athwart the hawsers of the main-stay, when
the difference of five minutes in the luffing might have sent us all to
the top of the lid of Davy Jones's locker ; for happily it was not deep
enough to allow us to go any lower, and we therefore could not have
sunk to the bottom. However, the recollection of the whole thing is
quite vivid enough to have suggested to us the following naval song,
to which we have given the appropriate title of—

THE BAY OF CHELSEA, OH !

Loud roar'd the smoking funnel,

The blacks came down in showers ;
The steam-pipe coughs like one ill,

The smoke above us lowers ;
The mud both thick and dark
Impedes our wretched bark :
There we lay,
Half a day,
In the Bay of Chelsea, oh !

Now dashed against the gravel,

We crumble, crash, and creak ;
At this rate we shan't travel

A mile within a week.
Cries of "Return the fare !"
Now rend the startled air :
" Did we pay,
Here to stay,
In the Bay of Chelsea, oh !"

At length a wished-for wherry
'Long side of us drew nigh ;
The prospect made us merry,

The laugh rose loud and high ;
But when, alas ! we knew
'Twould not hold half our crew,
None were gay,
As they lay
In the Bay of Chelsea, oh !

A little ease to give her

(To make her float we meant),
At once into the river

Her heavy chimney's sent.
To swim she now appears,
We give three hearty cheers,
As we scud
Off the mud,
In the Bay of Chelsea, oh !

A Delicate Attention.

EDUCATE THE SUPERIOR CLASSES.

Ant one who has doubts concerning the sad want of education
amongst the superior classes is requested to read the letter of the
Marquis of Londonderry, to Lord John Russell, published in
the Morning Post. It is so crowded with errors that it is evident
the noble Marquis has such a contempt for the very first principles of
education, that he does not even mind his letters. We think that a
commission ought to be issued to inquire into the state of education
of those who have to legislate upon the education of the people. The
mass of evidence collected, would, we are positive, be something
appalling ; and if Her Majesty does not issue the commission, Punch
certainly wilL

shameful assault on lindley murray.

A grand ballet has just been produced at the Academie Roy ale ia
Paris, under the title of Ozai. The scene is laid in " one of the islands
of Oceania," The original title was La Tahitienne, and the scene was
laid in " Papetee -," but the government interposed, for fear the entente
myrdiale might suffer from a supposed allusion to recent events in the
Pacific. They anticipated a pas seul o la Psitchard, and a pirouette a
Ui Pomare, and no doubt fancied Lord Normanby's feelings would be
hurt. This little incident is beautifully characteristic of the politest
people of Europe.

RATHER PERSONAL.

rp r> XT , There are some idle, foolish men, whom we cannot better compliment

lhecishop of Norwich has given great offence to the Dissenters than by disbelieving what they utter. Mr. Doheny is precisely one
Dy alluding to Mr. Baines as " Somebody from Leeds." If the Anti- ! of these. He is a mere word-flourisher, and therefore just to be pitied,
educationist had been called one of the "Nobodies from Leeds," perhaps Could we think him in earnest, we should believe him a subject
his friends would have been still more dissatisfied. \ requiring the speedy attention of a police-officer.

YOUNG IRELAND

Is so young that, like an unweaned baby, it does nothing but kick
and squall, and bend its little fists, and look blue in the face ; the while
Britannia—placid, unmoved nurse—allows it to roar its little bellyfull.
" When it's tired, 'twill go to sleep."

Within these few days, however, Young Ireland has been very
uproarious—but withal, very harmless. Mr. Charles Gavin Duffy,
in the Music Hall of Dublin, a few evenings ago, said it was

" A curious fact that the Macedonia, which was coming here from America, laden with
food, was at one time a British ship of war (cheers, and cries of ' More power I'). Did
Lord John Russell not fear that Irishmen might begin to think the only way British
ships of war could serve Ireland was by falling into the hands of the enemies of England?
{cheers)."

Oh, Duffy ! and would you desire that the tricolor, the stars and
stripes, should fly over English oak, as "the only way to serve
Ireland ? " No, Dufft, you had no such thought •, but you wanted
to be treated to a shout, and, Duffy, you got it.

A Mr. Doheny very much desired to rescue Ireland " from her
murderers." He, moreover, considered Lord Russell's head—that is,
off his shoulders—due to Ireland. He

" Declared that many a minister had his head cut off for less criminal conduct (cheers),
and if England was a just nation, the blood, the head of Lord John Russell would be
offered as a trifling expiation of his crimes against the people of Ireland (cheers)."

We have seen boxes, and other nicknacks, inscribed with " A trifle
from Margate ; " but there is something awful, nobly great in the
notion of a box, containing Lord Russell's head, shipped at Liverpool
for Dublin—a box marked, " A trifle for Ireland ! "