DOI issue:
January to June, 1848
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16546#0102
94 PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
FLUTTERING OF THE FEATHERED TRIBE.
The birds have been thrown into a state of the utmost consterna'ion j mistaken in thinking that steam is the agent that has thrown the bird
by the proceedings of Mr. Cantelo, who has overturned, or threatens | creation into the vapours, and though warm water is, in fact, employed
by Mr. Cantelo, the poultry complain bitterly of being called into
to overturn, the nests and other cherished institutions of the feathered
tribe. A meeting has been held, which we are sorry old iEsop is not
alive to report, and several resolutions have been agreed to against the
new hatching system, which is calculated to stifle some of the best feelings
of henhood and chickenhood, by severing the parental ties, and placing
an old tea kettle in loco parentis for the goslings, ducklings, pullets,
and others, who inhabit the world of poultry. We find we were
existence by such wishy-washy means.
It is quite evident, by the perturbation among the birds, that there is
something hatching in opposition to Mr. Cantelo's hydro-incubation,
which has caused a perfect hydrophobia among even the geese and
ducks, many of whom refuse to enter the water, for fear it should be
upon the boil.
MAKING THE MOST OF IT.
Our daily contemporaries have been making the most of the morsels
of intelligence coming from Paris, and have dealt it out in doses of
truly homoeopathic dimensions to their respective subscribers. Each
day we have had Second Editions, in which a quarter of a column has
been made up of tremendous type, forming a variety of catch-lines
similar to the following :—
SECOND EDITION
FURTHER PARTICULAR S.
FRESH INTELLIGENCE!
DISTURBANCES IN PARIS!!
OUTBREAK IN THE CAPITAL OF FRANCE.
COLLISION WITH THE TROOPS ! ! !
RENCONTRE WITH THE SOLDIERS.
CONTEST WITH THE MILITARY ! ! ! !
All this works exceedingly well, as far as the sale of our contemporaries'
papers may go; but it has been rather tantalising to the numerous
purchasers, who thought they were going to get something extraordinary
for their money, instead of an Extraordinary Express with the same
thing over and over again in it.
Who Harbours Another Man's Dog f
Two little boys—we cull the story from the Stamford Mercury—
having enticed a valuable dog, not their own, into Easton Wood, set it
upon a rabbit. The boys were fined for poachers; and the dog was
sent to Burghley, to Lord Exeter, that he might have a look at the
quadruped offender. The dog has been applied for, but has not been
returned to the owner. And, for our part, we trust it never will. As
boys of twelve and fourteen are fined under the Game-Laws, we do not
see wherefore a valuable dog, offending against the statute, should not
be duly castigated. "Love me, love my dog," says the proverb.
"Eine boys, and confine their pointer," implies a game-preserving
nobleman.
HINTS FOR MR. ANSTEY'S NEXT MONSTER MOTION.
We do hope that on the next occasion upon which Mr. Anstey may
favour the world with a Monster Motion, he will dress it up in a
manner somewhat more attractive than that with which he has invested
his recent exhibition. The following style, for instance, would have
been far more telling than the common-place twaddle he thought
proper to adopt, while the truth would have been adhered to almost as
closely as it was in the honourable Member's statement. The following
is a brief outline of such a speeeh as he might have spoken:—
Mr. Anstey, in moving for papers, condemned the policy of Lord
Palmerston, as a policy that had not only destroyed the present,
blighted the future, and with retrospective infamy tarnished the glories
of the past. Italy he had unnecessarily meddled with; and by having
too many Italian irons in the fire, he had burnt his fingers at last.
As to Turkey, he had so truckled to the northern autocrat, that Turkey
had not a drumstick it could call its own.
He (Mr. Anstey) would now turn to Egypt, and he would then ask
the House to look at the Egyptian Hall in Piccadilly, and then say
whether Lord Palmerston ought to show his face again. His treat-
ment of Circassia has completely stopped the growth of that promising
trade in Circassian Cream, which gave luxuriance to our crops. When
these charges were all responded to, he (Mr. Anstey) should have
another wheelbarrow full of documents to read to the House ; but in
the meantime he would give Lord Palmerston an opportunity of
answering the accusations now made.
Statistics of Torture.
A Parliamentary return, quoted by the Times, states that "the
total number of persons subjected to the punishment of logging in the
Royal Navy, in the year 1847, amounted to 860, and the number of
lashes inflicted upon them to 26,228." The compilers of^the return, we
suppose, were not arithmeticians enough to express in figures the cor-
responding amount of human agony. That, however, may be left
safely to the imagination.
shakspeare in the city.
A considerable majority of the Common Council negatived a motion
made by Mr. Lott to pay fifty guineas in aid of the purchase-money of
Shakspeare's House. Many of the Council defended their vote by
reason that they had never heard of Shakspeare before, and that if
they voted mrney for strangers in one instance, "there would soon be
no end of Shakspeares in the City."
Printed by William Bradbury, of No. 6. York Place, Stoke Newinsrton, and Frederick Mullen
Evans, of No. 7, Church Row, Stoke Newinjtton, both in the County of Middlesex, Printers, at
thir Office, in Lombard Street, in the Precinct of Whitefriars, in the City of London, and Pub
IHbed by them, at No. 85, Fleet Street, in the Parish of St Bade, in the C ty of London —
Satubdai, March 4th. 1S4Q.
FLUTTERING OF THE FEATHERED TRIBE.
The birds have been thrown into a state of the utmost consterna'ion j mistaken in thinking that steam is the agent that has thrown the bird
by the proceedings of Mr. Cantelo, who has overturned, or threatens | creation into the vapours, and though warm water is, in fact, employed
by Mr. Cantelo, the poultry complain bitterly of being called into
to overturn, the nests and other cherished institutions of the feathered
tribe. A meeting has been held, which we are sorry old iEsop is not
alive to report, and several resolutions have been agreed to against the
new hatching system, which is calculated to stifle some of the best feelings
of henhood and chickenhood, by severing the parental ties, and placing
an old tea kettle in loco parentis for the goslings, ducklings, pullets,
and others, who inhabit the world of poultry. We find we were
existence by such wishy-washy means.
It is quite evident, by the perturbation among the birds, that there is
something hatching in opposition to Mr. Cantelo's hydro-incubation,
which has caused a perfect hydrophobia among even the geese and
ducks, many of whom refuse to enter the water, for fear it should be
upon the boil.
MAKING THE MOST OF IT.
Our daily contemporaries have been making the most of the morsels
of intelligence coming from Paris, and have dealt it out in doses of
truly homoeopathic dimensions to their respective subscribers. Each
day we have had Second Editions, in which a quarter of a column has
been made up of tremendous type, forming a variety of catch-lines
similar to the following :—
SECOND EDITION
FURTHER PARTICULAR S.
FRESH INTELLIGENCE!
DISTURBANCES IN PARIS!!
OUTBREAK IN THE CAPITAL OF FRANCE.
COLLISION WITH THE TROOPS ! ! !
RENCONTRE WITH THE SOLDIERS.
CONTEST WITH THE MILITARY ! ! ! !
All this works exceedingly well, as far as the sale of our contemporaries'
papers may go; but it has been rather tantalising to the numerous
purchasers, who thought they were going to get something extraordinary
for their money, instead of an Extraordinary Express with the same
thing over and over again in it.
Who Harbours Another Man's Dog f
Two little boys—we cull the story from the Stamford Mercury—
having enticed a valuable dog, not their own, into Easton Wood, set it
upon a rabbit. The boys were fined for poachers; and the dog was
sent to Burghley, to Lord Exeter, that he might have a look at the
quadruped offender. The dog has been applied for, but has not been
returned to the owner. And, for our part, we trust it never will. As
boys of twelve and fourteen are fined under the Game-Laws, we do not
see wherefore a valuable dog, offending against the statute, should not
be duly castigated. "Love me, love my dog," says the proverb.
"Eine boys, and confine their pointer," implies a game-preserving
nobleman.
HINTS FOR MR. ANSTEY'S NEXT MONSTER MOTION.
We do hope that on the next occasion upon which Mr. Anstey may
favour the world with a Monster Motion, he will dress it up in a
manner somewhat more attractive than that with which he has invested
his recent exhibition. The following style, for instance, would have
been far more telling than the common-place twaddle he thought
proper to adopt, while the truth would have been adhered to almost as
closely as it was in the honourable Member's statement. The following
is a brief outline of such a speeeh as he might have spoken:—
Mr. Anstey, in moving for papers, condemned the policy of Lord
Palmerston, as a policy that had not only destroyed the present,
blighted the future, and with retrospective infamy tarnished the glories
of the past. Italy he had unnecessarily meddled with; and by having
too many Italian irons in the fire, he had burnt his fingers at last.
As to Turkey, he had so truckled to the northern autocrat, that Turkey
had not a drumstick it could call its own.
He (Mr. Anstey) would now turn to Egypt, and he would then ask
the House to look at the Egyptian Hall in Piccadilly, and then say
whether Lord Palmerston ought to show his face again. His treat-
ment of Circassia has completely stopped the growth of that promising
trade in Circassian Cream, which gave luxuriance to our crops. When
these charges were all responded to, he (Mr. Anstey) should have
another wheelbarrow full of documents to read to the House ; but in
the meantime he would give Lord Palmerston an opportunity of
answering the accusations now made.
Statistics of Torture.
A Parliamentary return, quoted by the Times, states that "the
total number of persons subjected to the punishment of logging in the
Royal Navy, in the year 1847, amounted to 860, and the number of
lashes inflicted upon them to 26,228." The compilers of^the return, we
suppose, were not arithmeticians enough to express in figures the cor-
responding amount of human agony. That, however, may be left
safely to the imagination.
shakspeare in the city.
A considerable majority of the Common Council negatived a motion
made by Mr. Lott to pay fifty guineas in aid of the purchase-money of
Shakspeare's House. Many of the Council defended their vote by
reason that they had never heard of Shakspeare before, and that if
they voted mrney for strangers in one instance, "there would soon be
no end of Shakspeares in the City."
Printed by William Bradbury, of No. 6. York Place, Stoke Newinsrton, and Frederick Mullen
Evans, of No. 7, Church Row, Stoke Newinjtton, both in the County of Middlesex, Printers, at
thir Office, in Lombard Street, in the Precinct of Whitefriars, in the City of London, and Pub
IHbed by them, at No. 85, Fleet Street, in the Parish of St Bade, in the C ty of London —
Satubdai, March 4th. 1S4Q.