Punch: Punch (15.1848)

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

241

CEASE, RUDE BOREA(LI)S.

We have been all last week dreadfully haunted with aBore-alis, which
has been flitting about the country in a most extraordinary manner. A
reverend gentleman at S onyhurst has been reading let-
ters by if at nine o'clock at night, without the aid of a
bit of rushlight, or even a morsel of moon, and other
people, in other places, have been sitting up until the
dawn of Aurora herself, in order to watch for Aurora's
friend, the Borealis, who has been forming a series of
brilliant back-grounds to our country's scenery. We
ourselves were thrown into a state of excrement and
alarm the other night, in driving up to our own door, to
find a luminous appearance at the back of our ab de, which
caused us to imagine the whole of the southern side of
our premises was iu flames; and, without asking a ques-
tion we rushed to the nearest fire-office—three miles off
—and returned accompanied by an engine, the pumps of
which were on the point of being brought to play upon
the Aurora Borealis, when the truth, and a meteoric
streamer, flashed upon our eyes.

These Aunvse Boreales have presented themselves
under very different, circumstances, and in one case the
eye of science found its socket, suddenly filled with a large
stick, while con'euipla'mg a quanti y of fiery streamers
accompanied by cracking noises of a most mysterious
character. The stick, on examination, proved to resemble that of the
rocket, and tends to show how much the fireworks of nature resemble
our own.

We ourselves, while rambling in the recesses of Rotherhithe, were
deceived by a grand halo, which we had booked as the Borealis, until
closer inspection convinced us it was the finale to a grand display of

fireworks, on the occasion of the
last gala of the season, at the
Cow and Cribbage Board, in the
neighbourhood of our stroll.

fHfe . I fl?'

mm m

no harm in examining one or two of these sturdy nautical, beggarly-
professors.

It is very curious that the Mendicity Market is "rigged" almost
exclusively with sailors! Does this arise from the fact that when a
ship has paid off its crew, that all the men are literally sent a begging ?
or is it the only employment on land that is open to a sailor ? It is
lamentable, however, that they should be allowed to drag children along
with them.

A NEW TURN IN MENDICANCY.

The kerbstones of the Metropolis are now invaded by a squadron of
hearty, jolly-looking sailors. They are in the regular T. P. Cooke cos-
tume—the glazed hat, the two curls, the ruled shirt, the loose tie, and
the full brteches without any braces. There they stand, with their
hands in their pockets, which they only take out to pat on the head
occasionally a poor shivering child, whom they station before them.
The child is generally very pretty, with a clean pinafore, and carefully
curled hair, and has a cardboard tied with a silk riband round its neck. !
This cardboard informs the spt-c ators that the child is "motherless,"
or that his "brothers and sisters are starving at home." At night, the
hardy sailor holds a candle, to make the mockery of misery all the more
apparent. The child then shivers with cold in reality, and the pennies
flow in most abund-tntly, the brave British tar holding his hat to collect
the stream of charity.

The exhibition 13 a most painful one, and, however profitable to the
parties interested, ought, to be suppressed. There must be an infant
training school for beggars, somewhere in London, with regular
appointed professors, to instruct children in the cunning tricks of
mendicity. These sailors are evidently Masters in the art, who have
taken all their degrees of roguery, and grown fat upon them, and the
children evidently are their pupils. It. is time that some inquiry were
made into this School of Vice; and, in the meanwhile, there could be

THE "BRITISH LABOURER" AT ANDOVER.

I'm Stephen Witcher, labouring man—of Andover I be,

A pauper of the workhouse, and a cripple in the knee;

The Guardians there have sent me out, here, in the cold and rain,

To zit all day, a breakin' stones in agony and pain.

I've arn'd my living honestly and fairly all my life,

And z°i, till lately, did suppoort a vamily and wife;

I broke my thigh some time agoo, but still I struggled on,

Notwithstandun that 'a left me wi' a 'largement 0' the bone.

But, twelvemonths gone come Christmas, I was cuttin' of a tree,
When, by ill luck, my axe did slip, and open laid my knee;
The neighbours put me in a cart and took me whoam to bed,
Wherefrom 'twas full five months afore I lifted up my head.

Lame as I was, I couldn't work ; zo what was I to do ?

Unto the Boord o' Guardians I at last was foced to goo.

" Oh! Witcher," says the Chairman—he's a parson, I should say—

" We '11 relieve you for a vortnight, but no longer—not one day.

" For when that time is up, you must turn to at breakun' stones."
" Why, Sir," says I, " you can't tell what I suffers in my bones ;
It' I do but put my foot to ground it pierces to the heart."
" We aint got nought to do wi' that," he says, and bids me start.

Then I went unto the Doctor, for to beg and pray of he
For to spake a word 0' kindness to 1 he gentlemen for me—
For my wife and li tie children's sake some pity to beseech :
He said he shouldn't alter. That was Ma. Doctor's speech.

Zo then I went to Captain Poore, an order for to beg

For the Hospital at Winchester, to cure my dreadful leg:

The Captain—thank him kindly—took and wrote un then and there,

By which means I got admitted under Muster Mayo's care.

Five weeks I bid in hospital, and there I had, I '11 own,
The ve.y best 0' tendance and 0' skill as could be shown;
But, erysip'las breakin' out, as I was ill and wake
Tney z nt me whoam again, for fear the 'fection I should take.

I left wi' a certificat from Doctor Mayo's hand
(Long life to un), which gave the Union Boord to understand
I wanted warmth and nourishment, in clothin' and in food,
If ever they expee'ed for to do me any good.

To the workhouse on my crutches then I hobbled back again,
And begg'd and pray'd for mercy, but my words was all in vain;
So here be I a crackin' stones in misery and grief,
And this here treatment's what they calls their " Sys'em of Relief.'*

Oh! gentlefolks, I don't purtend to be a larned man,
But I've lately had the newspeapers read to me now and taD,
I hem goins on in Vrance, I thinks, should tache ye to beware
Hjw ye drives the lower classes, as ye calls us, to despair.

Think well upon't, ye Lords and Squires, and rulers 0' the land:
As 'tis, there baint much love that's lost between us, understand;
The time may come when you may wish that you had know'd afore,
That kindness is the only means of keepun down the poor.

The New American Liner,

Now sailing daily between London and New York.

The astounding phenomenon of two vessels having seen the
American Sea Serpent within so short a date, (almost the same day),
and yet at such extraordinary distances from each other, is accounted
for now, by the very simple circumstance that one vessel saw the head,
whilst the other only saw the tail of this decidedly the longest monster
that is known—on record.

new proverb (SUBLIMELY RIDICULOUS.)

There is but one step from Napoleon Bonaparte to Louis-
Napoleon. •