DOI issue:
July to December, 1850
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16606#0060
52
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
as in revolutions people are often compelled to leave their lodgings, I
don't know when your dear, dear, dearest letter arrives—[No, not a word
about MY arrival.']—where your own Mouser may be."
And that, Mr. Punch, is what I have received from an absent husband ;
that is the reward of an affectionate wife, and
Your constant writer,
The Honeysuckles. Amelia Mouser.
THE ROYAL PROVIDENT FUND.
unch is anxious to give publicity to an insti-
tution which, under the above title, or some
other equally expressive, must positively be
established for the purpose of securing a pro-
vision for the destitute widows and orphans
of Royalty. The necessity of its formation is
manifested by a case, which a sense of decorum
did not prevent the Premier from bringing
before Parliament, and, therefore, will not for-
bid Mr. Punch to mention. The late Duke oe
Cambridge, having long been in the receipt
of £27,000 a-year, leaves his children in such a
state of such extreme indigence, that Govern-
ment, being obliged to provide for them, prevails upon the Legislature
to give the eldest son an annual pension of £12,000. Mr. Punch must
say that, if any one of the distinguished writers with whom he is
acquainted had held, for a lengthened series of years, an engagement of
upwards of £500 a-week, and had died without making a provision for
his family, he, Mr. Punch, would have been highly scandalised; and a
sense of duty to his Order compels him to remark that the dereliction
in question is a gross instance of the improvidence of non-literary men.
It is said that the £27,000 was chiefly spent in charity; a plea which
suggests the obvious reflection that charity should begin at home.
That such will be the commencement of that admirable virtue in the
practice of Royal Dukes and Princes, is the result to be hoped from
the foundation of the Royal Provident Pund, which of course is to be
self-supporting, and will be mainly dependent on the class whom it
more especially concerns. Like any other benevolent institution,
however, it will be open to subscriptions from everybody: and there
can be no doubt that it will receive an amount of encouragement com-
mensurate with the public's appreciation of the importance of main-
taining all the connexions of the Crown in splendour. Were a Prince
of the Blood to get his allowance from a Pund like this, he might ride
his two hundred guinea charger independently, without exposing him-
self to such invidious remarks, as " There goes £12,000 a-year, and
nothing to show for it but the clothes ;" or, " There goes the equivalent
to two dozen superannuated men of science or letters, comfortably
provided for with £500 a-year each."
The Royal Provident Pund will anticipate an objection which some
future Parliament may entertain to enabling Royal Highnesses to be
charitable at the expense of Mr. John Bull. That gentleman does
not much like penniless families to be devised to him, even when the
parents' claims are considerable. Nelson bequeathed Horatia to his
country, but the legatee has not yet administered to the will.
Lieutenant Waghorn's widow enjoys a pension some degrees
short of £12,000 a year. It is to be feared that if Mr. Bull's wishes
were consulted, the Royal Provident Pund is all that Royalty's poor
relations would have to look to.
It may be a recommendation of the Royal Provident Pund, to state
one rather important element in its arrangements. The pensions derived
from it will, in every case but that of absolute imbecility, be annexed to
situations and employments ; and the duties of the latter will be pro-
portioned as nearly as possible to the amount of the former. It may
occur to the reader that Lord John Russell might as well have had
this principle in view when he gave away £12,000 per annum of the
public money the other day.
PUNCH PAIRLY PUZZLED.
We are not very easily baffled in an attempt to solve a conundrum ;
we have seen through a deal board when it has been riddled all over
with shots; we have never had a difficulty about a charade, and as to
a rebus we have gone to it so boldly that our fortiter in rebus never
could be for an instant questioned ; but we admit ourselves to be fairly
puzzled by an advertisement, appearing almost daily, in the papers,
headed, "The oldest Juvenile Depot in London." We cannot under-
stand the compatibility between old age and juvenility, which that
announcement implies. Per baps, however, there is a jolly-buckism or
old-boyishness about the concern which justifies the title given to it in
the advertisements ; but at all events, in the absence of any authorised
explanation., we admit ourselves unable to say with confidence what the
" Oldest Juvenile Depot in London" can possibly mean.
SUMMER NOVELTIES IN BALLOONS.
There seems to be nothing stirring much, excepting balloons—and
they are "up and stirring" in every direction. The householders who
live in the neighbourhoods of Vauxhall and the Cremorne Gardens,
must have a nice time of it. What with the shouting, and the crowds,
and the noise, and the fireworks, they must detest the cry of "Balloon!
Balloon!" almost as much as a lady abhors the announcement of
" Please, ma'am, the kitchen chimbley's on fire." These detestations,
too, must be rather heightened by the probability of a parachute, with
a live tiger hi it, dropping in the back garden, or of a number of sky-
rockets falling through the skylight, and astonishing the master and
missus, as they are marching solemnly with their candlesticks up to bed.
The rage for experimental balloons must be stopped, or else all sorts
of extravagancies, annual and pyrotechnical, will oe committed in the
name of science, and every little tea-garden, or suburban saloon that
commands six square yards of open space, hi front, or in rear, of the
house, will be advertising a "Wonderful Ascent," either with or with-
out fireworks, or else with a pony, or a horse, or a donkey, or something
of that sort. The mania of hnitation exists as strongly between capitals
as between individuals, and, as it extends, is sure to increase in
absurdity. Now, as Paris has lately witnessed the ascent of a Balloon
with a pony, all " alive and kicking," London is certain to be favoured
before long with the exhibition of some intrepid aeronaut, who will
richly deserve the laurels, as well as the appeUation of Green, by
ascending with a bull, or a giraffe, or, it may be, an elephant. Who
knows, if this public appetite for Balloons grows more ravenous, that we
may not be astonished some fine morning at breakfast, with the
announcement in the papers of a piece of insanity, like the following :—
UNPARALLELED ATTRACTION.
Wonderful Ascent this Evening oe Mr. Green
In his celebrated Fulham Balloon with the
HIPPOPOTAMUS
{Of the Zoological Gardens)
Who has kindly lent his valuable services for this occasion only.
At the altitude of 200 feet above the level of Chelsea, Me. Gkeex will
descend from the car on to the back of the Hippopotamus, and discharge a
BRILLIANT DISPLAY OF FlREWORKS.
-iV.-B. For Seats on the hack of the Hippopotamus, apply at the Box Office
of the Gardens.
The only question is, if the above absurdity is attempted to be per-
petrated, who is there to stop it ? We are afraid that, from their very
nature, Balloons are out of the reach of the Law, and if a policeman
were sent to "take up " a balloon, the chances are that he would only
be taken up himself. As there is a class of policemen expressly for the
river, there may probably be instituted a new class of aerial policemen
purposely to navigate the " silent highway " of the clouds. It will be
rather awkward, though, to approach a balloon whilst it is discharging
a brilliant display of fireworks, and difficult, as well as unpleasant, to
take it into custody whilst committing the act.
THE CHILTERN HUNDREDS.
Broth is said to suffer materially from a superfluity of cooks ; and if
the rule applies equally to an over-abundance of domestic servants in
every other department, we wonder how the Chiltern Hundreds can
exist under the plurality of Stewards that are constantly tendering their
services. If these hundreds were thousands, there might still be a
Steward for every particular unit; so numerous are the acceptances of
the office, in which there appears, nevertheless, to be a perpetual
vacancy. The new Chief Justice of the Common Pleas has, we learn
from the London Gazette, just taken upon himself the Stewardship of
these Hundreds, as a sort of relief, no doubt, to his severer duties ; for
the Chiltern Hundreds appear to impose upon their stewards no occu-
pation that may not be combined with any other employment, however
arduous or dignified.
We wish Lord Campbell would employ his leisure in giving to the
world the Lives of the Stewards of the Chiltern Hundreds, an account
of whose stewardships would form a series sufficiently long to furnish
ample materials for even his untiring industry. We should be glad to
know whether the Chiltern Hundreds employ in addition to a Steward,
the usual establishment of butler, footman, page, cook, and housekeeper.
We should recommend the hundreds who "want places," to write down
to Chiltern at once, and ascertain whether the Hundreds, which have
always a vacancy for a steward, may not find room for other classes of
domestics.
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
as in revolutions people are often compelled to leave their lodgings, I
don't know when your dear, dear, dearest letter arrives—[No, not a word
about MY arrival.']—where your own Mouser may be."
And that, Mr. Punch, is what I have received from an absent husband ;
that is the reward of an affectionate wife, and
Your constant writer,
The Honeysuckles. Amelia Mouser.
THE ROYAL PROVIDENT FUND.
unch is anxious to give publicity to an insti-
tution which, under the above title, or some
other equally expressive, must positively be
established for the purpose of securing a pro-
vision for the destitute widows and orphans
of Royalty. The necessity of its formation is
manifested by a case, which a sense of decorum
did not prevent the Premier from bringing
before Parliament, and, therefore, will not for-
bid Mr. Punch to mention. The late Duke oe
Cambridge, having long been in the receipt
of £27,000 a-year, leaves his children in such a
state of such extreme indigence, that Govern-
ment, being obliged to provide for them, prevails upon the Legislature
to give the eldest son an annual pension of £12,000. Mr. Punch must
say that, if any one of the distinguished writers with whom he is
acquainted had held, for a lengthened series of years, an engagement of
upwards of £500 a-week, and had died without making a provision for
his family, he, Mr. Punch, would have been highly scandalised; and a
sense of duty to his Order compels him to remark that the dereliction
in question is a gross instance of the improvidence of non-literary men.
It is said that the £27,000 was chiefly spent in charity; a plea which
suggests the obvious reflection that charity should begin at home.
That such will be the commencement of that admirable virtue in the
practice of Royal Dukes and Princes, is the result to be hoped from
the foundation of the Royal Provident Pund, which of course is to be
self-supporting, and will be mainly dependent on the class whom it
more especially concerns. Like any other benevolent institution,
however, it will be open to subscriptions from everybody: and there
can be no doubt that it will receive an amount of encouragement com-
mensurate with the public's appreciation of the importance of main-
taining all the connexions of the Crown in splendour. Were a Prince
of the Blood to get his allowance from a Pund like this, he might ride
his two hundred guinea charger independently, without exposing him-
self to such invidious remarks, as " There goes £12,000 a-year, and
nothing to show for it but the clothes ;" or, " There goes the equivalent
to two dozen superannuated men of science or letters, comfortably
provided for with £500 a-year each."
The Royal Provident Pund will anticipate an objection which some
future Parliament may entertain to enabling Royal Highnesses to be
charitable at the expense of Mr. John Bull. That gentleman does
not much like penniless families to be devised to him, even when the
parents' claims are considerable. Nelson bequeathed Horatia to his
country, but the legatee has not yet administered to the will.
Lieutenant Waghorn's widow enjoys a pension some degrees
short of £12,000 a year. It is to be feared that if Mr. Bull's wishes
were consulted, the Royal Provident Pund is all that Royalty's poor
relations would have to look to.
It may be a recommendation of the Royal Provident Pund, to state
one rather important element in its arrangements. The pensions derived
from it will, in every case but that of absolute imbecility, be annexed to
situations and employments ; and the duties of the latter will be pro-
portioned as nearly as possible to the amount of the former. It may
occur to the reader that Lord John Russell might as well have had
this principle in view when he gave away £12,000 per annum of the
public money the other day.
PUNCH PAIRLY PUZZLED.
We are not very easily baffled in an attempt to solve a conundrum ;
we have seen through a deal board when it has been riddled all over
with shots; we have never had a difficulty about a charade, and as to
a rebus we have gone to it so boldly that our fortiter in rebus never
could be for an instant questioned ; but we admit ourselves to be fairly
puzzled by an advertisement, appearing almost daily, in the papers,
headed, "The oldest Juvenile Depot in London." We cannot under-
stand the compatibility between old age and juvenility, which that
announcement implies. Per baps, however, there is a jolly-buckism or
old-boyishness about the concern which justifies the title given to it in
the advertisements ; but at all events, in the absence of any authorised
explanation., we admit ourselves unable to say with confidence what the
" Oldest Juvenile Depot in London" can possibly mean.
SUMMER NOVELTIES IN BALLOONS.
There seems to be nothing stirring much, excepting balloons—and
they are "up and stirring" in every direction. The householders who
live in the neighbourhoods of Vauxhall and the Cremorne Gardens,
must have a nice time of it. What with the shouting, and the crowds,
and the noise, and the fireworks, they must detest the cry of "Balloon!
Balloon!" almost as much as a lady abhors the announcement of
" Please, ma'am, the kitchen chimbley's on fire." These detestations,
too, must be rather heightened by the probability of a parachute, with
a live tiger hi it, dropping in the back garden, or of a number of sky-
rockets falling through the skylight, and astonishing the master and
missus, as they are marching solemnly with their candlesticks up to bed.
The rage for experimental balloons must be stopped, or else all sorts
of extravagancies, annual and pyrotechnical, will oe committed in the
name of science, and every little tea-garden, or suburban saloon that
commands six square yards of open space, hi front, or in rear, of the
house, will be advertising a "Wonderful Ascent," either with or with-
out fireworks, or else with a pony, or a horse, or a donkey, or something
of that sort. The mania of hnitation exists as strongly between capitals
as between individuals, and, as it extends, is sure to increase in
absurdity. Now, as Paris has lately witnessed the ascent of a Balloon
with a pony, all " alive and kicking," London is certain to be favoured
before long with the exhibition of some intrepid aeronaut, who will
richly deserve the laurels, as well as the appeUation of Green, by
ascending with a bull, or a giraffe, or, it may be, an elephant. Who
knows, if this public appetite for Balloons grows more ravenous, that we
may not be astonished some fine morning at breakfast, with the
announcement in the papers of a piece of insanity, like the following :—
UNPARALLELED ATTRACTION.
Wonderful Ascent this Evening oe Mr. Green
In his celebrated Fulham Balloon with the
HIPPOPOTAMUS
{Of the Zoological Gardens)
Who has kindly lent his valuable services for this occasion only.
At the altitude of 200 feet above the level of Chelsea, Me. Gkeex will
descend from the car on to the back of the Hippopotamus, and discharge a
BRILLIANT DISPLAY OF FlREWORKS.
-iV.-B. For Seats on the hack of the Hippopotamus, apply at the Box Office
of the Gardens.
The only question is, if the above absurdity is attempted to be per-
petrated, who is there to stop it ? We are afraid that, from their very
nature, Balloons are out of the reach of the Law, and if a policeman
were sent to "take up " a balloon, the chances are that he would only
be taken up himself. As there is a class of policemen expressly for the
river, there may probably be instituted a new class of aerial policemen
purposely to navigate the " silent highway " of the clouds. It will be
rather awkward, though, to approach a balloon whilst it is discharging
a brilliant display of fireworks, and difficult, as well as unpleasant, to
take it into custody whilst committing the act.
THE CHILTERN HUNDREDS.
Broth is said to suffer materially from a superfluity of cooks ; and if
the rule applies equally to an over-abundance of domestic servants in
every other department, we wonder how the Chiltern Hundreds can
exist under the plurality of Stewards that are constantly tendering their
services. If these hundreds were thousands, there might still be a
Steward for every particular unit; so numerous are the acceptances of
the office, in which there appears, nevertheless, to be a perpetual
vacancy. The new Chief Justice of the Common Pleas has, we learn
from the London Gazette, just taken upon himself the Stewardship of
these Hundreds, as a sort of relief, no doubt, to his severer duties ; for
the Chiltern Hundreds appear to impose upon their stewards no occu-
pation that may not be combined with any other employment, however
arduous or dignified.
We wish Lord Campbell would employ his leisure in giving to the
world the Lives of the Stewards of the Chiltern Hundreds, an account
of whose stewardships would form a series sufficiently long to furnish
ample materials for even his untiring industry. We should be glad to
know whether the Chiltern Hundreds employ in addition to a Steward,
the usual establishment of butler, footman, page, cook, and housekeeper.
We should recommend the hundreds who "want places," to write down
to Chiltern at once, and ascertain whether the Hundreds, which have
always a vacancy for a steward, may not find room for other classes of
domestics.