PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

69

SUPREME COURT OF THE LORD HIGH INQUISITOR

PUNCH

PAT V. THE WHIG JUSTICE COMPANY.

This is a cause of thorough orthodox equity standing, having commenced before
the time of legal memory, with every prospect of obtaining a final decree on its
merits somewhere ahout the next Greek Kalends. In the present term,

Counsellor Baywig moved, on the part of the plaintiff, who sues in fortna
pauperis, for an injunction to restrain the Whig Justice Company from setting a

SPORTING IN DOWNING STREET.

" CoMK out-will you !"

The extraordinary attachment which the "Whigs have displayed for office has
been almost without parallel in the history of ministerial fidelity. Zoologists talk
of the local affection of cats, but in what animal shall we discover such a stroDg
love of place as in the present government ? Lord John is a very badger in the
courageous manner in which he has resisted the repeated attacks of the Tory
terriers. The odds, however, are too great for even his powers of defence ; he
hungry Scotchman—one of their own creatures, without local or professional has given some of the most forward of the curs who have tried to drag him from

his burrow some shrewd bites and scratches that they will not forget in a hurry ;
but, overpowered bv numbers, he must " come out" at last, and yield the victory
to his numerous persecutors, who will, no doubt, plume themselves upon their

PUNCH'S EXTRA DRAMATIC INTELLIGENCE

(by the correspondent of the observer.)

The dramatic world has been in a state of bustle all the week, and parties are
going about declaring—not that we put any faith in what they say—that Macready
has already given a large sum for a manuscript. If he has done this, we think he
is much to blame, unless he has very good reasons, as he most likely has, for
doing so : and if such is the case, though we doubt the policy of the step, there
can be no question of his having acted very properly in taking it. His lease
begins in October, when, it is said, he will certainly open, if he can; but, as he
positively cannot, the reports of his opening are rather premature, to say the least
of them. For our parts, we never think of putting any credit in what we hear,
but we give everything just as it reaches us.

knowledge—over the lands of which the plaintiff is the legal, though unfortu
catelv not the beneficial owner, as keeper and head manager thereof, to the gross
wronir of the tenants, the depreciation of the lands themselves, the further reduc-
tion of the funds standing in the name of the cause, the insult to the feelings j dexterity at drawing a badge
and the disregard of the rights of gentlemen living on the estate, and perfectly
acquainted with its management; and finally, to an unblushing and barefaced
denial of justice to all parties. The learned counsel proceeded to state, that the
company, in order to make an excuse for thus saddling the impoverished estates
with an additional incubus, had committed a double wrong, by forcing from the
office a man eminently qualified to discharge its functions—who had lived and
grown wliite with honourable years in the actual discharge of these functions—
and by thrusting into his place their own needy retainer, who, instead of being
the propounder of the laws which govern the estates, would be merely the appren-
tice to learn them ; and this too at a time when the company was on the eve of
bankruptcy, and when the possession which they had usurped so long was about
to pass into the hands of their official assignees.

Lord High Inquisitor.—What authorities can you cite for this application ?

Counsellor Baywig.—My lord, I fear the cases are, on the whole, rather
adverse to us. Men have, undoubtedly, been chosen to administer the laws of
this fine estate, and to guard it from waste, who have studied its customs, beer. THE MONEY MARKET

thoroughly learned in its statistics, and interested, by blood and connexion, in its Tin is twopence a hundredweight dearer at Hamburgh than at Paris, which
prosperity; but this number is very small. However, when injustice of the gives an exchange of 247 mille in favour of the latter capital,
most grievous kind is manifest, it should not be continued merely beeause it is A good deal of conversation has been excited by a report of its being intended
the custom, or because it is an " old institution of the country." I by some parties in the City to establish a Bank of Issue upon equitable principles.

Lord High Inquisitor.—I am quite astonished at your broaching such abo- ! The plan is a novel one, for there is to be no capital actually subscribed, it being
miuable doctrines here, sir. You a lawyer, and yet talk of justice in a Court expected that sufficient assets will be derived from the depositors. Shares are to
of Equity! By Bacon, Blackstone, and Eldon, 'tis marvellous ! Mr. Baywig, if: be issued, to which a nominal price will be attached, and a dividend is to be de-
you proceed, I shall feel it my duty to commit you for a contempt of court. I dared immediatelv.

Counsellor Baywig.—My lord, in that case I decline the honour of address- The association for supplying London with periwinkles does not progress very
ing your lordship further ; but certainly my poor client is wronged in his land, in ] rapidly. A wharf has been taken ; but nothing more has been done, which is,
himself, and in his kindred. It is shocking personal insult added to terrible we believe, caused by the difficulty found in dealing with existing interests,
pecuniary punishment. _

Lord High Inquisitor.—Serve him right ! We dismiss the application with J

costs signs of the times.

The Tories are coming into office, and the Parliament House is surrounded
with scaffolds 1

to bakers and fishmongers.

Want places, in either of the above lines, three highly practical and experienced
hands, fully capable and highly accomplished in the arduous duties of " looking
after any quantity of loaves and fishes." A ten years' character can be produced
from their last places, which they leave because the concern is for the piesent
disposed of to persons equally capable. No objection to look after the till.
Wages not so much an object as an extensive trade, the applicants being desirou3
of keeping their hands in. Apply to Messrs. Russell, Melbourne, and Palmerston,
Downing-street Without.

THE ADVANTAGES OF STYLE,

Some of the uninitiated in the art and mystery of book-making conceive the
chief tax must be upon the compiler's brain. We give the following as a direct
proof to the contrary—one that ha3 the authority of Lord Hamlet, who summed
the matter up in three

"Words! Words! Words!"

In one column we give a common-place household and familiar term—in the
other we render it into the true Bulwerian phraseologv:

Does your mother know
you are out ?

Is your maternal parent's natural solicitude
allayed by the information, that you have for the
present vacated your domestic roof?

You art geographically and statistically misin-
formed ; chis is by no means the accustomed place,
of your occupancy, Mr. Ferguson.

Behold ! he proceeds totally deprived of one
moiety of his visual organs !

Pray confess, are you not really particularly-
anxious to obtain the desired object ?

Infinitely, peculiarly, and most intensely the
entire extreme and absolute reverse.

Dissimilar as the far-extended poles, or the
deep-tinctured ebon skins of the dark denizens of
Sol's sultry plains and the fair rivals of descending
flakes of virgin snow, melting with envy on the
peerless breast of fair Circassia's tea-fold white-
washed daughters.

Over the left. Decidedly in the ascendant of the sinister.

You don't lodge here, Mr.
Ferguson.

See ! there he goes with
lis eye out.

Don't you wish you may
get it ?

More t'other.

Quite different.

From the nobleman who is selected to move the address ;a the House of Lords,
rt would seem that the Whigs, tired of any further experiments in turning their
coats, are about to try what effect they can produce with an old Spencer.

As the weather is to decide the question of the corn-laws, the rains that have
lately tilleD may bo called, with truth, the reins of government.

"-It is very odd," said Sergeant Channell to Thessiger, " that Tindal should
have decided against me on that point of law which, to me, seemed as plain as
A B C." " Yes," replied Thessiger, " but of what use is it that it should have
been A B C to you, if the judge was determined to be D E F to it ?"

clever rogues.

The Belfast Vindicator has a story of a sailor who pledged a sixpence for
threepence* having it described on the duplicate ticket as " a piece of silver plate
of beautiful workmanship," by which means he disposed of the ticket for two-
and-sixpence. The Tories are so struck with this display of congenial roguery,
that thev intend pawning their "Bob," and having him described as " a rare
piece of vertu (e) premiere qualite" in the expectation of securing a crown by it.

MUNTZ ON THE STATE OF THE CROPS.

Mr. Muntz requests us to state, in answer to numerous inquiries as to the
motives which induce him to cultivate his beard, that he is actuated purely by a
spirit of economy, having, for the last few years, grown his own mattresses, a
practice which he earnestly recommends to the attention of all prudent and hir-
sute individuals. He finds, by experience, that nine square inches of chin will
produce, on an average, about a sofa per annum. The whiskers, if properly
attended to, may be made to yield about an easy chair in the same space of time;
whilst luxuriant moustachios will give a pair of anti-rheumatic attrition gloves
everv six months. Mr. M. recommends, as the best mode of cultivation for
barren soils, to plough with a cat's-paw, and manure with Macassar.

The Earl of Stair has been created Lord Oxenferd. Theodore Hook thinks
that the more appropriate title for a Stair, in raising him a step higher, would
have been Lord Landing-place, or Viscount Bannister.