DOI Artikel:
Three stories
DOI Seite / Zitierlink:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.21215#0163
By V., O., CS. 159
The superiority of the older experienced women made the girl
feel weak. She would have a joy in confessing herseif.
" I suppose it was chiefly Gerty's marriage which set me think-
ing I'd better change. Until then I'd lived contentedly enough.
I'm easily occupied, and I feit no necessity to work. But when I
was left alone with father, I began gradually to feel as iflcouldn't
go on living so, as if I hadn't the right ; nothing I ever did pleased
him. And then I wondered what I was waiting for-"
She looked up at Lady Beamish and saw her fine features set
attentively to her Störy ; she could teil everything to such a face—
all these things of which she had never spoken to any one. She
looked away again.
" Was I waiting to get married ? That idea tortured me.
Why should ideas come and trouble us when they're untrue and
bear no likeness to our character ? "
She turned her head once more to glance at the face above
her.
" I looked into myself. Was it true of me that my only out-
look in life was a man, that that was the only aim of my life ? It
wasn't necessary to answer the question, for it flashed into my
mind with bitter truth that if I'd been playing that game, I'd
been singularly unsuccessful, so I needn't trouble about the
question-"
Astonished at herseif, she moved her hand up, and Lady
Beamish stretched out hers, and held the girl's hand upon her lap.
Then, half ashamed of her frankness, she went on quickly and in
a more ordinary tone :
" Oh, that and everything eise—I was afraid of growing bitter.
When my father threw up his work and decided to go to Algiers
with his old friends, that seemed a good opportunity : I would do
something for myself, you're justified if you work. It seemed
hopeful
The superiority of the older experienced women made the girl
feel weak. She would have a joy in confessing herseif.
" I suppose it was chiefly Gerty's marriage which set me think-
ing I'd better change. Until then I'd lived contentedly enough.
I'm easily occupied, and I feit no necessity to work. But when I
was left alone with father, I began gradually to feel as iflcouldn't
go on living so, as if I hadn't the right ; nothing I ever did pleased
him. And then I wondered what I was waiting for-"
She looked up at Lady Beamish and saw her fine features set
attentively to her Störy ; she could teil everything to such a face—
all these things of which she had never spoken to any one. She
looked away again.
" Was I waiting to get married ? That idea tortured me.
Why should ideas come and trouble us when they're untrue and
bear no likeness to our character ? "
She turned her head once more to glance at the face above
her.
" I looked into myself. Was it true of me that my only out-
look in life was a man, that that was the only aim of my life ? It
wasn't necessary to answer the question, for it flashed into my
mind with bitter truth that if I'd been playing that game, I'd
been singularly unsuccessful, so I needn't trouble about the
question-"
Astonished at herseif, she moved her hand up, and Lady
Beamish stretched out hers, and held the girl's hand upon her lap.
Then, half ashamed of her frankness, she went on quickly and in
a more ordinary tone :
" Oh, that and everything eise—I was afraid of growing bitter.
When my father threw up his work and decided to go to Algiers
with his old friends, that seemed a good opportunity : I would do
something for myself, you're justified if you work. It seemed
hopeful