DOI article:
Traill, Henry D.: The papers of Basil Fillimer
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.21806#0027
By H. D. Traill 23
my true opinions. In fact, I thought at the time that I had never
acted under the influence of a motive so clearly visible along its
whole course from Thought to Will, and so manifestly free from
any the smallest fibre of impulse having its origin in the subliminal
consciousness. Yet now I am beginning to doubt.
“ June 24.—On a closer examination I feel that my motive was
not, as I then thought, compounded equally of a legitimate desire
to vindicate my own intelligence and of a praiseworthy anxiety not
to add to my aunt’s spiritual perplexities, but that it was subtly
tainted with an illegitimate longing to continue my study of her
curious case. Consequently, I cannot now assure myself that if I
had not known that further concealment of my opinions would
arrest my aunt’s confidences and thus deprive me of a keen
psychological pleasure (which I have no right to enjoy at her
expense) the legitimate inducements to candour that were
presented to me would of themselves have prevailed.”
There is much more of the same kind ; but I will cut it short
at this point, not only to escape a headache, but to ask any
impartial reader into whose hands this apology may fall, whether,
I—who as I said before am not only John Johnson by name but
by nature—am a fit and proper person to edit the posthumous
papers of Basil Fillimer.
I come now, however, to what I consider my strongest justifi-
cation for declining this literary trustr Though I had, and
indeed still retain, the highest admiration for Basil Fillimer’s
intellectual subtlety, and though, confessing myself absolutely
unable to follow him into his refinements of analysis, I hazard
this opinion with diffidence, I do not think that, except in their
curiosity as infinitely delicate and minute mental processes, his
speculations are of any value to the world. I have formed this
opinion in my rough-and-ready way from a variety of circum-
stances;
my true opinions. In fact, I thought at the time that I had never
acted under the influence of a motive so clearly visible along its
whole course from Thought to Will, and so manifestly free from
any the smallest fibre of impulse having its origin in the subliminal
consciousness. Yet now I am beginning to doubt.
“ June 24.—On a closer examination I feel that my motive was
not, as I then thought, compounded equally of a legitimate desire
to vindicate my own intelligence and of a praiseworthy anxiety not
to add to my aunt’s spiritual perplexities, but that it was subtly
tainted with an illegitimate longing to continue my study of her
curious case. Consequently, I cannot now assure myself that if I
had not known that further concealment of my opinions would
arrest my aunt’s confidences and thus deprive me of a keen
psychological pleasure (which I have no right to enjoy at her
expense) the legitimate inducements to candour that were
presented to me would of themselves have prevailed.”
There is much more of the same kind ; but I will cut it short
at this point, not only to escape a headache, but to ask any
impartial reader into whose hands this apology may fall, whether,
I—who as I said before am not only John Johnson by name but
by nature—am a fit and proper person to edit the posthumous
papers of Basil Fillimer.
I come now, however, to what I consider my strongest justifi-
cation for declining this literary trustr Though I had, and
indeed still retain, the highest admiration for Basil Fillimer’s
intellectual subtlety, and though, confessing myself absolutely
unable to follow him into his refinements of analysis, I hazard
this opinion with diffidence, I do not think that, except in their
curiosity as infinitely delicate and minute mental processes, his
speculations are of any value to the world. I have formed this
opinion in my rough-and-ready way from a variety of circum-
stances;