Punch: Punch (11.1846)

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

65

RELICS AT A OISCOUNT.

THE ANTI-SLAVERY HANNIBAL.

Scene—A Dining-room, with a very well-spread table. Present, Hannibal

and Friend.

What ! let in slave-grown Muscovados !

Help Brazil of her sugar to rid !
What! give way to Free-trade bravados !

No ! Wilberforce, Clarkson, forbid !
I'd not touch such a sweet'ner accursed,

Tho' it cost but this penny a pound—
(And Hannibal flourish'd his copper,

Dug in Cuba, by slaves, from the ground.)

To wormwood 'twould turn in my cobbler,

To gall it would change in my tea ;
For a conjuror, potent as Dobleb,

Is the spirit of hu-man-i-tie !
Ere my babes should suck lolly-pops slave-grown,

I'd hang them all up, Sir, in that—
(And Hannibalfingered, heroic,

His slave-grown, seaisLund cravat.)

unch observes with
regret that the
rage for relics has
abated consider-
ably since the
days when the
identical egg-shell
of the identical
egg that Napo-
leon was eating
before the battle
of Austerlitz,
fetched a guinea
and-a-half under
the hammer. We
>have known the
time when the
announcement of
a sale of relics
would have
brought large

capitalists into No> no ' at mv table y°u re safe> felr'

competition for From all fruit of the negro's despair—

the precious lots. -^ut' bless me ! amidst all this talking,

But now we You eat nothing at all, I declare !.

really believe. Tray, do try that curry—for boiling

that if Napo- ^he rice I've a plan of my own :—

leon's best St (And Hannibal gulped down a spoonful,

Helena night-cap, or his Fontainbleau slippers, were to appear in a 'Twcui til* best Carolma^slave-grown.)

catalogue; there would be no great sensation excited in the public ? , have finish>d your dumer j

mind by such an announcement . , . I can answer for that Curacoa ;

At a sale the other day, Lord Grey s coat was put up and only got Rotterdam merchant-

a bidding-of seven shillings, which must have been actually less than „, _ ' & , n „

•■ j • Vr i n o» x. x> -v u „ Slave-erown ?—Oh, how can vou talk so i

it would have produced in Holywell Street Perhaps however, as a sh^k j ^ ^ ^ coffe

^ °f ul£S I""616 CrtmUtf 7 Dgl^ °n i j % i For the nerves 'tis a famous resource-

talueS ^ S° aS Hanntbal WZo«^ JfocAa,

' ,.. 0 Sk" , . , , , .i i j. • .. ill.. v.„„, 'Twos slave-raised, Brazilian, of course.)

It Brougham s coat had been the lot m question, we should not have ' ' J J

been surprised at the smallness of the offer. As it was once said that And now. as my wife's down at Brighton,

the mantle of Erskine had fallen on the Ex-Chancellor, we recommend An(j y0Urs ]l0rs L[e combat, old bov^

him to call in an old clothesman when he wants to get rid of it, seeing We'll make it a Bachelor's'dinner—

that at public auctions a fair price cannot be relied upon. >Tis a treat we don>t often eDjoy. [Brings out box of cigar*

There ! Pnros ! Direct from Havannah !

You may wink, but I tell you they are—
(And Hannibal straight disappear d
'Neath the cloud of a slave-grown cigar.)

COPY OF A LETTER FROM THE LORD MAYOR TO THE
CLERK OF THE WEATHER,

" Mansion House, Thursday Evening, July 2>0th.
" The Lord Matos presents his compliments to the Clerk of the
Weather, and begs to inform him, that, having a private dinner party at
the Mansion House on Saturday next, at six, and being unable, after
repeated applications, to get any ice from the exhausted stores of the
Wen ham Lake Company, that, should the Clerk of the-Weather have
remaining by him any small pieces calculated for mixing in sherry
cobblers, and could send a supply into London about that time, the
Lord Mayor will feel himself deeply indebted to the Clerk of the
Weather."

We need not inform the public how promptly this request was com-
plied with. The liberal supply of hailstones that was thrown into

%l\)z Olfjurci) in Banger.

" Mr. Punch,

"I was educated at Oxford, Sir ; subscribed to the Thirty-
nine Articles, and all that; and therefore have, I trust, the affection ot
a most dutiful child for Mother Church Well, Sir, with this filial
love beating beneath my white waistcoat, (for I am proud to say it, 1
am not all unknown to that growing power, that k< rnel of the country,
Young England), it is not without a mixture of horror and indigna-
tion that I have read the account of what is called the Salomons
London on the Saturday so'warmed the heart of the Lord Mayor, Scholarship. It seems that Mr. Salomons, ingratitude to the Mdel
that he has sent the Clerk of the Weather the freedom of the Glaziers5 Peel for throwing open the Mayoralty to Jews-(I only hope that the
Company.

The Pen and tbe Sword.

The British Lion never wanted to make a meal, not even of a
Yankee cabin-boy ; and we hope that the American Eagle is now con-
tent to feed upon native Indian corn, instead of dining upon Britishers,
gloriously dead upon the battle-field. Mr. Calhoun, however, very

gold chain mayn't be missing in a year or two)—has founded a scholar-
ship to bear his Hebraic name ! He—a Jew—gives money to educate a
Christian in the very bosom of Mother Church ; and we, a Christian
people, look on and applaud the act ; and Sir Robert Inglis does not
put himself in sackcloth, or shake a cinder-sieve above his head !

" But this is not all. The Morning Herald—the last hope of the
truly faithful—eulogizes the act of Mr. Salomons as ' an act of gene-
rosity that recommends itself by its pure patriotism and disinterested-
ness.' And this is the way that the Herald writes of Jews ! I should

wisely attributes all this to the tongues of statesmen and the quills of ias soon have thought to see mv blessed grandmother kiss an old
public writers. " Had there been," says the American, '-the least false
step on the other side—had the speeches in Parliament, or the articles
in the public journals been of an exasperating character, we could not
then have arranged matters on this side as we have done." And then
he lauds the moderation of Peel and Aberdeen. And all this cheer-
ing for the present, is hopeful for the future. A statesman's windpipe,
wisely employed, may in good time shut up in rusty dumbness those—
-" mortal engines, whose rude throats

Th' immortal Jove's dread clamours counterfeit,"

and half-a-dozen quills of half-a-dozen journalists prove too much for
a whole park of artillery. Mortars are devastating instruments—and
vet thev mav be beaten by inkstands.

Vol. li.

! as soon
clothesman!

" However, Mr. Punch, I have done my duty. If the Salomons'
scholar should, after all, not be a Christian, but a Jew in sheep's
clothing—and I confess I have my private doubts upon the matter—if he
should not have placed a lamb, but a viper in the bosom of Mother
Church at the University—if the Chancellor turns a Rabbi—if the feast
of Purim is celebrated on the banks of the Isis, and the Passoyer held in
the Halls of Oxford, I still, amidst the wreck of all that is dear to every
Englishman, have this consolation—I did not suffer myself to be silent.
If the Capitol of our liberties was betrayed, it wasn't for the want of
the warniDg voice of

"A Lover of the Good Old Times."