Punch (12.1847)

PUNCH, OH THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

49

THE PUNCH CONGRESS.

America. Well, for my part, I think Punch is the true grit, after
all. Now and then I do feel a leetle streaked when the critter is so
tarnation sharp upon repudiation ; and I do think that Bancroft
EADER ! It is under such ought *° 'monstrate when Punch goes agin sellin niggers and all sich

rot as that: nevertheless, though he does ryle us now and then, there's
goodness in the critter, and, takin' him wholesale and retail, I shall
vote for Punch. Besides, we make a good many cents of him ; we
almost reprint him; and so, under the no Copyright Act of the
freest nation upon airth, we get all that's good without payin for it.
Prussia. I helieve the liberality of my opinions are well known.

title that the approaching
Congress of crowned heads
will be known to the future
world : a Congress especially
called to consider the pro-
priety of encouraging the cir-

culation or entirely banning ■ (Subdued laughter: Russia winks, and puts tongue in cheek.) You know I
the appearance of Punch in ^ave Prortnsed to give a Constitution to my people ; and to show that
various States ' As our pro- * am tremendously in earnest I shall continue to promise. As for
phetic daily contemporaries ' trutn' tnat our brother of Russia speaks of as the commodity of
are always enabled to give ' PuncJl—why, I like truth. I think it—like gold—very precious ; but,
the Queen's Speech before ^e gold, not to be put upon all things. And therefore—though,
it falls in pearls and dia-! ur)derstand me, I am of liberal notions, and propose to advance with
monds,' from the royal lips, the a£e> and a^ t^at—nevertheless, as a sovereign who, some day,
so are' we mysteriously per- mtends to be a most constitutional monarch, I say, with Austria and
mitted to anticipate the argu- Russia—No Punch /

ments about to be adduced 1 Portugal. For my own part, the thing having what is called writing
by anointed wisdom, at the *n it- * have never seen it;- Nothing of that sort ever comes into
Punch Congress Portugal. But, in compliment toother States, I say—No Punch >

France. My opinions are well known. Since the infamous attack
Present : England, France, made by Punch upon that sweetest and meekest of sons, Prince Join-
Austria, Russia, Belgium, ville, I have banned it ; and, moreover, I have doubled the number
'r^v -Portugal, Prussia, Spain, of custom-bouse officers at all the ports : I have had the hat-linings

\^jr £ff\~~~ ^^=^lfes^ ( ^\ America, and the Roman of all travellers ripped open, to detect Punch ;—but, sacre bleu ! it's

States. smuggled, right and left. I've learned that it's brought into France

England. Royal Brothers hy five tnousat,d pigeons ; whereupon, I intend to organise battalions,
b and Sisters and Republican t0 ^e ca^ed L'armee des Pigeons, to kill all carriers crossing the seas,
and Papal Friends ! Punch P^nch 1 „ ■ ,

being our own subject we feel Roman States. We have caused to be opened two hundred shops

maternally moved to' ask of exPressly f°r tDe 8a^e 0T" Punch. We have installed translators, at the
you the offences alleged rate °^ ^ve tnousan(i scudi per annum each, to turn the English into
against him choice Italian, and artists at the same stipend. Tou will see what

\/j ^Wt^*^^ Russia Offences Sister R-ome wiu become with steam, railways,and Punch. We say, VivaPunch!

England ! Why he speaks ! Belgium. For my own part, I should have no objection to Punch, if
the truth ! And I put it to ^ad 110 Pictures °f persons, and did not write about Government
my Brethren, my Sisters here, tnu:ig8- I have not yet banned Punch to the braves Beiges; but, as I
what is in the end to become 'iave kicked out tne caricaturists from Brussels, 'twill be only out
of us, if we give free license of ^P^ to m7 sister of England if Punch doesn't follow,
to truth? Whv, it cuts deeper England. And having heard all you have to say against our
than the knout ' Permit worthiest and best beloved Punch, I shall immediately give orders that
s \ \\ tjie free uge Q£ an(j j tejj one copy, at least, be furnished to every room of Windsor Castle,

you it will in time corrode ^SDorne House, Claremont, Buckingham,—in fact, to one and all of my
the bars of prisons and the r°yal Palaces. So Vivat Regina .'—Punch for ever !
fetters of what are called

patriots ! Allow the goose-1 - ~~rT- -

quill to do what it may, and

farewell to our eagles ! No j THE OPENING OF PARLIAMENT.

Punch! ^ tt is not true that Baron Nathan claimed to enter the House of

Austria. Very right : I m! Lords on the first day of the session as Baron of Rosherville. It is,

sure that's right. I am a however, a fact that " Baron Nathan took his place on one of the

wise emperor and a great Opposition benches ;" but the circumstance occurred in the following

potentate ; and though trai- manner :— Anxious to testify his loyalty to his Queen, and his

tors say I want brains, what attachment to his Constitution, the Baron had gone into the Park to

of that—haven't I a crown ? witness the procession. He was bargaining with the owner of a

And what, I should like to wooden plank for permission to stand upon it, when a man came by

know was a crown like mine wit^ some °^tne usual forms that are always observed on the occasion

invented for, if it wasn't to £ Her Majesty's going down to open the Parliament. Baron

tV.o w nf nf Vi o* 9 Nathan fancying there would be better accommodation on one of

cover tne want 01 orams . the?e articles than Qn a mere board5 was in doubt what to do> when a

., aJ?j.°n? ' U ' f ' i quarrel ensued between the rival speculators in the sight, and Baron
la ! Why, didn t he make ; Nathan. as jt has been truly observed, did ultimately "take his place
me and Russia, and Prussia, I on one of the Opposition benches."
dance the Cracovienne ? I |

know he meant me, for I < -
looked so foolish : it was me,

for my dog barked at the Absenteeism.

likeness ! Down with Punch / , _..

_No punch I The Sun has been an absentee now for several days—in the North

Spain For my nart I care *"or several weeks. We think Mr. HturE should move for a remission of
▼erv little about JWJl Vnr the Window Tax uPon ever7 {oSSJ day throughout the year—though
very ntue aoout runch. x or tHg wQuld be equivalent (as a foreigner would say) to the repeal of the

. , „ " °Paniar<lB are t0° Proud , Tax altogether. But it is rather too bad that we should be called upon

to read, and generally too lary to use their eyes ; and, moreover, t0 pay for Ught when we do not have it Some change, however, is

as I don't think I've above twenty booksellers in all Castile and \ necessary, for the present system of burning the candle at both end
Arragon. I care little for what Punch writes, or what he draws. 1 paying for candles and daylight too—is enough to ruin everybody but
Nevertheless, to please Russia and Austria, I say, No Punch.' the tallow-chandlers.