Punch: Punch (15.1848)

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI,

RECREATIONS IN NATURAL HISTORY.

THE MISREPRESENTED CITY.

We read of a toast being siven at the Lord Mayor's

Feast, to the "Members of the City." Now the City ia
without its fu'l complement of Members, which we look
upon as the worst compliment that could be paid to a city
that professes to be "the most civilised metropolis in the
world."

Since Baron Rothschild has been thrown out, the
City of London has been most singularly misrepresented
in Parliament. The least Ministers can do in return
for a good dinner, is next session to re-Member the City.
We are told that Rothschild was advised to respond to
the toast; but he said, with great irony and modesty, "My
feelings won't allow me—I never felt so disgracefully
put out." We wish he had risen and spoken aa
follows :—

" Gentlemen, I was elected by you; but the House of
Lords said, ' This man is not worthy to represent you,
because he is a Jew.' Parliament says to the City of
London 'Make your free election;' but mind, that election
is null and void, if it happens to be a Jew. Government
is not too proud to ask my advice now and then upon finan-
cial matters ; but then it declares I am unqualified to legis-
late upon such questions, because I am a Jew. I am
received everywhere, the honours of the City are open
to me, I can en'er every place with renown, but the House
of Commons—the door of that is shut in my face, simply
because I am a Jew. You associate with me, foreign
States deal with me, Kings have been my clients, every
capital in Europe puts confidence in me, you with the same
confidence elect me vour Member ; but the House of
Lords says, that confidence is grossly misplaced, because
I am a Jew. Let us hope the day is not far distant when
England will respect the opinions, and honour the consciences
of all men, even of Jews."

thereby hangs a tale.

Firtt Naturalist. "What! Tut; S-S-Sh&Shek-eent a-a.n (hic) Ich (hic) thvo-
aiuEus 1 jS'onshe-e.nse ! "

Second Naturalist. "Who said Ich-(hic) Ichthy-0-8ACRPS1 I said a (hic) Plfsi-
O-(hic) saurus plainenuff."

Lord Brougham has left England in a steamer. We are
informed, but mind we do not state how credibly, that his
Lordship has started expressly to have an interview with the
Great Sea Serpent. He intends to devote the remainder of

his life to this pursuit.

MAC-BULL AND THE RAILWAY WITCHES. I ^KVS of tot?

Scene—Near a Tunnel at Midnight. In the middle a boiler with the A Private Act that guarantees

(Jar power to treat folks as we please ;

steam up Shrieks of the Railway whistle at intervals.

Stokers cheap, and smashes plenty;

Enter the Three Witches, (Great Western, South Western, Forty per cent, instead of twenty ;

and North Western.) For sole bye-law our high pleasure;

1st Witch. Thrice 'he shareholder hath rued !

2nd Witch. Thrice ! and once director whined!

Zrd Witch. Hudson cries—Combine ! Combine !

1st Witch. Round about the boiler go,

In new plans and projects throw;
Shares, that ere debenture loan,
At a hundred oft were done,
And now for fifty may be got—
Boil thou first in the charmed pot.

All. Bubble, bubble, without trouble,

Fares increase, and profits double !

2nd Witch. Wits of shareholder opaque ;

Brain 0' director wide awake ;
Eye of Jew, and tongue of stag,
Fees and briefs from Counsel's bag;
Guarantees of five per cent.;
Profits that to pay them went;
And all the rest that caused our trouble-
Pitch 'em in to boil and bubble.

All. Bubble, bubble, without trouble,

Shares send up, and profits double !

Zrd Witch. Heavier fares and fewer trains;

Public loss and Railway gains;
Third-class trucks, like Noah's ark,
For clean and unclean, damn and dark ;

Engines at, low price and high pressure,
(No matter though they smash and scald one,)
Add to the ingredients of our cauldron.

All. Bubble, bubble, without trouble,

Fares increase and profits double !

•2nd Witch. Join three directors' heads and hands,

And the amalgamation stands !
2>rd Witch. Now for picking up our crumbs !—

Something stupid this way comes !

Open strong box, to buy our stocks !

Enter Mac—bull.
Macb. How now, vou secret, sharp, and downright stags,
Who is't jou'd do?
All. To us 'tis quite the same !

A Ray of Sunshine at last.
This has certainly been a wonderful year; but of all wonders that
have been packed as close as a carpet bag into it, none has been more
wonderful than the wonder which set everybody wondering on Lord
Mayor's Day. Future ages will be astonished to hear that the Show
passed through the City without a drop of rain, and reached Guildhall
without the ghost of a fog. _ The Sun was distinctly visible all day!!
This is the first time within the recollection of the Oldest Man in
Armour, that the Civic Monarch's reign has begun without a shower.