Punch (28.1855)

154

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

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POTICHOMANIA (THE ART OF DECORATING GLASS), CARRIED OUT BY
MASTER TOM DURING THE EASTER HOLIDAYS.

systpm of tho school, and stating the terms for the above
young lady; and also (separately) for a little girl, of 7 years-
old, and staling likewise the number of pupils and of
teachers. Address, &c. &c.

If this announcement had been addressed to
the Mrs. Wiiackeord Sqtjeerses of the present
day—if any such exist—it would at once have
appealed to the class that must have been in
the eye of the “ lady” who is in want of “sum-
mary and decisive ” treatment for “ a young
lady (above 13) who is giving her Mamma much
trouble.”

The equanimity of this “Mamma”—we are
glad she does not assume the title of Mother
—must be disturbed by very small causes if a
girl of 13 is enough to throw her so completely
off her moral balance that she savagely demands
a school “ where the system is more summary
and decisive than the ordinary run of modern
establishments.” Some of these—at £16 a-year
and upwards—are conducted on a scale of star-
vation and cruelty that would satisfy a mode-
rate taste for torture, though the “ Mamma ” of
the above advertisement will not be contented
unless the “ disciplinary system ” is explained,
and the nicer details of torturing are pointed
out in such a way as to satisfy her that the young
lady, aged 13, will get literally her “whack” for
the money.

While providing for the punishment of the
unfortunate child that has “given trouble,” the
considerate “Mamma” hopes to save herself
from future trouble by throwing “ a little one
in.” While bargaining for a supply of strictness
and severity for her elder plague, she demands
a statement of the “ terms ” on which “ a little
girl of 7 years old” may be “severely and sum-
marily ” dealt with. It is scarcely possible that
a child of seven can have done much to disturb
the tranquillity of this formidable “ Mamma,”
who is evidently premature in her scheme of
torture as far as her younger victim is concerned,
even if the elder one should have been occa-
sionally “ troublesome.” It does not seem to
i have occurred to this exemplary Mamma—ex-
’ emplary as shewing us what to avoid—that
Mammas are the fittest persons to take “ trouble ”
with girls of thirteen, who if handed over to
the tender mercies of the Sqtjeerses, are likely
to brmg a world of trouble on themselves and
all belonging to them—not excepting their
“ Mammas ”—at a later period.

THE CRUELTY MANIA.

It seems to be the favourite doctrine of the present day that crime among respectable
females is a disease, and it would appear that the disease is catching—for it evidently spreads
—though we had rather see the parties “ catch it ” in a different sense from that which is
usually employed. With regard to contagious maladies, Miss Emilie Frances Gordon, the
baronet’s daughter,—who took it into her head to cure a jibbing pony by a series of atrocities
quite scientific in their way as experiments in the art of cruelty—has infected other females,
in whom the contagion shows itself with more or less ot virulence.

A comparatively mild- case of feminine indifference to suffering, amounting indeed to a
certain degree of appetite for the infliction of pain, may be recognised in the following
advertisement recently extracted from the Times.-—

TO SCHOOLMISTRESSES.—WANTED, immediately, for a young lady (above 13), who is

-L giving her Mamma much trouble, a cheerful, but very strict, SCHOOL, where the system with the pupils is
more summary and decisive than in the ordinary run of modern establishments. Write, describing the disciplinary

SONG OF THE SEASON.

BY A SOLICITOR.

The Crocus blows in early Spring,
The Snowdrop also rises ;
Primroses come, with birds that sin£
And likewise the Assizes.

Green are the lanes as lovers, w'ho
Make promises to marry ;
Whereas the Violets are blue :

So is the bag I carry.

May and Maynooth.

Mr. Spooner has given notice to the Commons
to move “on the first of May for a Committee
to take into consideration the laws relating to
Maynooth College with a view to their repeal.”
This, on the first of May! We hear that Mr.
Newdegate has promised to pour out ladie-
fulls of eloquence, and Colonel Sibthorp has
pledged himself to be up and dressed as Jack-in-
the-Green : nevertheless, we put it to the honour-
able two whether, on such a day, such an oppo-
sition is quite fair to the chimney-sweepers ?

Ornamental Eret-work.—The eyes of your
beloved after she has been crying.