Punch (61.1871)

I

September 16.. 1871.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. Ill

"HAPPY THOUGHT."

Mistress {who had come down to see about the Bass Voice she had heard in the Kitchen—Guardsman discovered I). " 0, you Deceitful
Girl, to say there was Nobody here ! And after I'd given you distinctly to understand I didn't allow ' Followers ;'

and here, you haven't been here a week-"

Cook. " Lauks, M'm, it must be one o' the Follerers as the last Cook left be'ind 'er ! !"

STATIONS OF H.M. NAVY.

{From the Navy List for September.)

Hippopotamus
Armadillo .
Argonaut
Castor and Pollux
Thunderer
Inextinguishable
Indomitable .
Inexhaustible
Wombat.
Bison.
Mammoth
Megatherium
Visigoth .
Astrolabe .
Ark

On an Iceberg.
On Goodwin Sands.
On Table Rock.
On Melita.
On Land's End.
On Cape Clear.
On Eel-Pie Island.
On the Kyles of Bute.
On Staten Island.
On the Nore-Light.
On a Kraken.
On Margate Pier.
On Isle of Serpents.
On an Eyot.
On Ararat.

Nominal Analogy.

Adhtrai Jaureguiberry, says the Post, has arrived at Versailles.
The name of the gallant Admiral seems analogous to certain English
names whose proportions we curtail in the utterance. Have the
French any way of pronouncing Jaureguiberry such as we adopt
with Cholmondexey and Marjoribanks ? If a Jaureguiberry
were to become naturalised here, he would probably get, in time,
to be called Jibbeby.

nature's abhorrence.

The best person—indeed, the only person—to fill a Vacuum, is a
Dentist.

AN ASTRONOMO-LEGAL DIFFICULTY.

To the Editor of Punch.

Sir,—I have the misfortune—one which I suspect I share with
the great majority of those of my countrymen who have received
"a first-rate education"-—to be destitute of scientific knowledge.
This, therefore, must be my plea for seeking for an explanation of
what I see described as " The Periodic Comet of Arrest." Does it
mean, can it mean, that in those upper circles in which such exalted
luminaries as comets move, there is not entire freedom from the
disagreeable operations of the Law to which we poor sublunary
creatures are liable ? A word from you would be a great satisfac-
tion to Ignoramus.

[We must refer you to the Astronomer-Ptoyal or the Vacation
Judge.—Ed.]

Means of Matrimony.

A correspondent of the St. James's Magazine cites an instance-
which occurred as late as twenty-five years ago, of a couple marries,
with the church-key instead of a wedding-ring. There appears to
be some doubt as to the validity of this substitute, but in point of
symbolism, at any rate, a church-key is surely, in comparison with
a marriage ring, the more suitable instrument of wedlock.

A Step in Dental Surgery.

A Dentist in the Strand advertises in his window a " Guinea
Jaw." The "Guinea Jaw," if an artificial one, may, one would
think, be safely warranted to last any person so unfortunate as to
want it, his lifetime. Or does the " Guinea" mean a fee, and the
" Jaw " a guinea's worth of advice on the care of the teeth ?