Punch (92.1887)

jv__PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. _ [Jtoy 2, 1887.

national invincibility, of which the historian speaks, against soi-disant Invincible Armadas, from whatever quarter. Depart-
mental duffers—beshrew them!—can do much mischief, but there's one thing they cannot do."
" What is that ? " asked both the Shades, eagerly.

" Stop our supplies of Drakes and Cecils, of Howabds and Raleighs, of Elizabeths and—Victorias," responded
Mr. Punch. " And," pursued he, " if this were a war-beacon instead of a peace-bonfire, trust me that from ' Malvern's lonely
height' in the Midlands, again would flare forth the ruddy signal of ready loyalty,—

1 Till Belvoir's lordly terraces the sign to Lincoln sent,
And Lincoln sped the message on o'er the wide vale of Trent;
Till Skiddaw saw the fire that burnt on Gaunt's embattled pile,
And the red glare on Skiddaw roused the burghers of Carlisle!'"

" Marry ! but this Macaulay of yours hath the right British ring in him 1" burst forth Dhake, enthusiastically.

" Nathless," said Cecil, more soberly, " let not the old lion of England be caught napping, Mr. Punch."

" Sirs," said the Sage, stirring up the bonfire till it blazed forth afresh in sky-reddening radiance, " Sirs, there is an
inextinguishable beacon-l'ght, of another sort than this, ever before the eyes of that noble if somewhat somnolent animal,
which will prevent a fortuitous forty winks ever lapsing into the lethal lethargy of a Rip Van Winkle's slumber."

" And that ? " cried the Shades, simultaneously.

" It is light and fire made portable as the staff-hidden spark of Prometheus," answered Mr. Punch. " Like unto a
Fauee battery, it stores immense force in small compass, and for public convenience is replenishable half-yearly. It can be
multiplied to any extent, and conveniently carried to any distance. You, if you wish, can take it with you to illuminate the
Shades, and warm your patriotic bosoms with knowledge and good hope."

" What is it ? " ejaculated Mr. Punch's ghostly Visitants.

" Take it and try it, most noble Shades," responded Punch, heartily. " By its light you shall see both the best and
the worst of the grand old land you greatly loved, and as greatly served. You shall see how, despite the feuds of faction and
the rumblings of official folly, England is England still—only more so. You shall see how sleepkss a sentinel, how vigilant
a warder, how stout a champion, her honour and best interests have in-"

" Yourself! " cried the great Elizabethans, simultaneously.

" Precisely," said Mr. Punch, calmly. " Natural modesty must not be indulged in at the expense of obvious truth.
You shall see, also, how I counsel her counsellors, lead her leaders, enlighten her illuminati, reward her heroes, trounce her
traitors, castigate her humbugs, and flagellate her fools. In short, you shall see, as by a brilliant beacon-glare, all that is
best worth seeing in this England of the Victorian Jubilee Year."

Whereupon, without another word, Punch presented to the two illustrious Elizabethans his