Punch or The London charivari (3.1842)

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

the

CHINESE EXHIBITION AT KNIGHTSB RIDGE.

will readily be believed when it is pointed out that one ends and the
other begins withT. These two religions would fain knock the third
on the head, but they can't, because it has no temples. The first is
decidedly a pacific sect, for they worship their "Fo," and try to make
a friend of him. The second is a religio-philosophic sect. Its founder
civil government in china. bag been called the Epicurus of China, from which we may reason-

The civil institutions of China claim to be fashioned upon the exact ably jnfer that when Horace used the expression " Epicuri de grege
model of a wise family government. The Emperor is invariably p0rcus," he had a Chinese pig, if not a Chinese sty, in his eye. We
spoken of as the " Father of the Nation,"—and justly for the most j are not personally given to joking, but we think it very likely

that the humorous Dr. Kitchener, who ought to have been ap-
pointed by the Crown (and Sceptre) Gastronomer Royal at Green-
wich, if asked for a receipt for such a pig as this, would have
commenced thus :—" Take your Grecian philosopher, and stuff him
with some Chinese Sage." The doctrines of Confucius are embodied
in nine volumes, which we recommend to the attentive perusal
of Messrs. Spode and Copeland, for they contain "The whole duty
of a Chinaman." The sententious brevity of style in these cele-
father of the sun. brated productions often renders the meaning impenetrably obscure,

anxious parent never whipped his children more frequently. Chinese but this is an accident which will sometimes happen to the best-regu-

lated books. Confucius avoided subjects strictly religious, for he
admitted that he understood little concerning the gods, and his most
celebrated commentator, Choo-footze or CW-footze (how often has
it been said, that a servile commentator would like his idol's foot !)
confirms him.

LANGUAGE of CHINA.

We have neither time nor space to do more under this head, thai>
throw together a few hints for those who delight to trace the simi-

whipping, however, seems to be the very antipodes of English, for
there they often whip people's Jieads off. The astonishing rapidity
with which the heads of offenders are sometimes taken off is enough
to excite the jealousy of Monsieur Daguerre. The process, indeed,
is brought to great perfection ; the execution is instantaneous—and
if the likeness is not striking, the executioner is. In busy times, we
should imagine that heads may be purchased there for about the
same price they are openly sold in the shops here—namely, one

penny In the capital the operation is usually performed under the ^ be"tween tlie languages of distant and dissimilar countries, to
immediate superintendence ot the Emperor himself; in the provinces, ^ ' Doubtlessfwere the subject closely followed up, some

under that ot the officer whose province it is. j exceedingly curious discoveries might be made. At the first blush

face of the country. j 0f the thing, no two languages can appear less like one another than

The general face of China is flat, especially the nose. The only j the English and the Chinese ; and yet the Chinese call "rice" "nice,"
prominent parts are called, in the mono-syllabic but expressive lan- I an<i « f00d » « good." On first tasting " beer," and being asked what
guage of the country, Tscheek Bones. | lt waSj they said " queer." Again—" bread " was once held up to a

Chinese ideas of BEAUTy. j Chinese who had just dined, when,afterlookingat it attentively,he said

Corpulence is considered a beauty in a man—so much so that people i "fed." Anotherbeingshown animmense "stick," pronouncedit"thick."
seem to think but little of a slight acquaintance. On the other hand, i A third had a high " wall" pointed out to him, and called it " tall."
light ladies weigh heaviest in the scale of beauty, while heavy ladies ! Even in sentences composed of two or more words, there is now and
are made light of. However, there is no rule without an exception, j then a close resemblance in the two languages. For example—a
for the most celebrated Bell in Pekin weighs 128,000 pounds. So Chinese soldier levelled an arrow at an English soldier, to whom he
general an objection exists to great feet, and such a great feat is it j was so close that, had the shot taken effect, the Englishman must

thought to have small ones, that the feet of female children of five
years old are actually taken up and bound over not to grow any more.
Their soles thus become as small as Rochester soles, and they are as
easily caught, for they cannot walk straight; so that, like other small
soles, they might with more propriety be called slips. These tiny
lumps of deformity are dignified with the appellation of " Golden
Lilies," a name which is supposed to have had its origin in the excla-

have been killed. Luckily the string of the bow broke, and the arrow-
as well as the Chinaman's plan fell to the ground. The soldiers of
both countries simultaneously pronounced this " an-arrow escape."
Many other instances might be adduced, but surely we have said
enouo-h to whet the appetite of philologists. More than this can
hardly be expected from Punch, when Mr. Tradescant Lay, in his
admirable work " The Chinese as they Are," distinctly informs us

mation of a negro, who, on first seeing a Chinese lady's foot in a yellow | that " the Chinese doctors who, at the command of Kang-he, under-
silk shoe, cried out, " 0 me Fader—dere's a lilly golden ting !" And I took to compile dictionaries, did not understand the principles of their
yet how the negro could say this, when the same binding which checks > own language.

the foot won't let the knee grow, we cannot guess. Surely it is '' Chinese arts and arms.

not only a cruel but a short measure which cribs ten inches out of i yye gban not attempt a description of the arts in use by so artful a
every foot ! j peopie as the Chinese. Suffice it to say, that Chinese society is one

curiosities of china. « Royal Society of Arts," of which the Emperor is perpetual Pre-

There are many curiosities in China ; so many, that we must leave sident, and every individual in the nation a life-member. It is due,,
travellers to discover them jfor themselves. One hint, however, may however, to the Royal President of this Royal Society to state that he
help to save them time. In every city, town, and even village, they j has never resigned on account of the members drinking so much tea j
may visit, they will find the greatest curiosity of the place in the pos- ' on the contrary, he likes them to drink it. As to their arms—the
session of the ladies. arms of the Chinese are almost as curious as the feet of their wives—

and these may be called, when it is remembered that we are at war
with them—the most attractive portion of the exhibition. Their
weapons are not numerous. Their swords, like all bad arguments,
may be said to cut two ways, for they sometimes kill themselves witb

a n-odd man.
religion of china

There are three sects—the Buddhist, the Taou sect, and the Con

moke ways than onf-

fucian. The two first are the more regular Chinese religions, which , them instead of their enemies. Their guns are match-locks, and each