Punch or The London charivari (4.1843)

166

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

TREASONOUS ATTACK ON HER MAJESTY.
Punch has been greatly shocked by a very treasonable letter in
the columns of The Times. Whether Punch's friend, the Attorney-
General, has had the epistle handed over to him, and contemplates
immediate proceedings against " C. H.," the traitorous writer, Punch
knows not : but after this information, the distinguished law-officer
cannot plead ignorance of the evil, as an apology for future supine-
ness. The letter purports to be a remonstrance to our sovereign
lady the Queen ; in a measure, accusing her gracious majesty of a
certain degree of indifference towards the interests of London trade,
of literature, the arts and sciences. The rebel writes as follows :—
"Buckingham Palace is neither so agreeable nor salubrious a residence as Windsor,
r>ut neither is the crown so pleasant to v. ear as a bonnet. I trust it i3 not necessary to
remind Queen Victoria that royalty, like property, has its duties as well as its rights. One
of these duties is to reside in the metropolis of the kingdom, the presence of the Sove-
reign in the capital being essential on many occasions. I could enumerate other duties
of the Sovereign, such, for instance as con/erring fashion on public entertainments that
deserve to be encouraged by attending such pluces of amusement, and countenancing
science, literature, and the arts, by honouring distinguished professors with murks of
approbation; in which respect it is much to be regretted there is too much room for
those remarks on the remissness of Her Majesty in these respects that are so frequently
made in society. When we know how much discontent, engendered by widely-spread
and deeply-felt distress, is expressed by persons not to be numbered among ' the lower
classes,' it is not without alarm that the influence of these acts of omission on the part
of Queen Victoria can be regarded ; and it becomes the duty of every friend of the
monarchy and the constitution to warn the Sovereign of the danger, not merely to her
ipersonal popularity, but to the feeling of loyalty to the throne, that is likely to accrue
from such neglect."
If all this be not" flat rebellion," Punch knows not the meaning
of syllables. And then how basely unjust the insinuations ! In the
first place, is not her Majesty a constant play-goer ? (See Punch
for the long and faithful reports of the Queen's state visits to Drury-
Lane and Covent-garden this season !) Next for the "countenance
given to science !" Why, was not her Majesty graciously pleased to
express her satisfaction with the photogenic impression of the Chinese
Treaty ? And then for art, does not the Queen sit at least once a day
for her portrait to Sir C. Ross, or some such national painter ? Have
we not, too, the very highest historical school royally patronized
in Royal Christenings?—subjects, as Mr. Moon pathetically has it
on his show-cards, " so dear to the heart of every English mother !"
A neglect of art! Why, is there a puppy of six weeks old in
Windsor kennel, that has not, by royal order, sat to an R. A. ? Shall
we not, at the opening of the Royal Academy, have the most gorgeous
evidence of royal patronage of art, in the Queen's parrots, Queens
cockatoos, Queen's monkeys, Queen's gold-fish, shining and glitter-
ing from t'venty frames at least? And then, how has "C. H."
the audacity to hint at an indifference to the persons of "distin-
guished professors" of literature, art, and science, at the palace?
Why, was not Lord William Lexnox presented a day or two
since, solely on the strength of his Tuft Hunter ? Is tioc the royal
dinner-table crowded with poets, philosophers, astronomers, sculptors,
painters, engineers ? Has Punch published so many Court Circulars
to so little effect ? Can the world be all as ignorant of the realities of
Buckingham Palace and Windsor Castle as " C. H.I" who—in con-
clusion— we once more recommend to the urbanity of the Attorney-
general.

A "LOAF" OR AN "EYE!"

Some time since, Louisa Bolton, in the frenzy of intense hunger—
she had, too, a pining child in her arms—stole a loaf from a baker's
in the Wahvorth-road. She was sent to gaol, and at the expiration
of two months was tried, receiving sentence of four months' further
imprisonment ; in all, six months' incarceration. She took the child,
it was then healthy, to gaol with her, where it " wasted away almost
to a skeleton," and a day or two since died, the juryr returning a
verdict of " Natural death."
Last week, a man named Bennett, " gentleman," was tried at the Old
Bailey for plunging a fork into a man's eye, by which the organ was
entirely destroyed. We pass the suffering, the agony of the man, and
come to the permanent wrong he is to bear with him to his grave.
The offender Bennett is sentenced to six months' imprisonment; in \
fact (for he was out on bail), to the same punishment inflicted upon j
Louisa Bolton,—famishing with a famishing child,—for stealing a loaf.
Sacred things, indeed, are the Corn-laws—sacred and thrice sacred
is property." Take a man's loaf off his counter, and you take his
eye from his head. The punishment being the same, the offence
mi.st, of course, be equal.
Alarming Intelligence.—It is rumoured that Sir Edward Lyttoa Bulwer
has ju3t completed a five-act play. j

rRIBUTE TO MR. ROWLAND HILL.

Mr. Rowland Hill, having taught the Government the proper
use of its letters, is now cashiered by the Ministry ; the Cabinet
fearing that any further tarrying of the Post-Office reformer in St.
Martin's-le-Grand would cause a convulsion among the authorities.
We understand that at a meeting of London bankers and merchants,
held on Thursday, it was resolved to present to Mr. Rowland Hill,
the statuettes of Peel, Graham, and Gotjlblrn in the very best
pewter. They are to have a sheet of music in their hands, written
with the glee—which they are to sing with great vigour and accord
—of
" Blow, blow, thou winter wind !
Thou art not so unkind
As man's ingratitude."

IMPORTANT TO BARBERS,


a perfectly .novel i ?v ewtton.
Manufactory of Living Clothes Brushes ; welt-aired, and animated
Hair Brushes, with Musical accompaniment.
Messrs. Metcalf and Co. have opened an establishment in this neigh-
bourhood, for the cultivation of the breed of that highly useful and orna-
mental quadruped, the
erjnaCEUS eukopjeus. vulgarly denominated the hedgehog.
Messrs. Metcalf and Co., who have for avast number of years devoted
their exclusive attention to the various departments of Brush-making,
confidently anticipate that the use of the
live hedge- hog,
(with a muzzle) will be likely to supersede every other species of Brush,
either for the Hair, Teeth, or Raiment.
%* Old, half-worn Hedge-hogs, for brushing Boots, scouring StairB
and Street-door Steps, at unusually low prices,
iggr The best allowauce made for " Sucking Hedgepigs."

W H V S AND W H E N S.
BV AN EMINENT PROFESSOR.
Why are Publicans subject to imposition «
Because they are liable to take Inns.
Why was Lord Huntingtower like an empty house:
Because he had such lots of bills on him.
Why does a penny pieman shed scalding tears ?
Because he cries " all hot."
Why is the Isle of Wight like Whitechapel 2
Because it's famous for its Needles.
What is the difference between Punch and Judy?
A quarrel.
Why is the snow different from Sunday *
Because it can fall on any day in the week