Punch or The London charivari (4.1843)

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

182

saved to the public. To offer an insult to them was felony without
benefit of clergy ; and it was an insult to make them an offer.
If a Vestal infringed her vow, it will be of course imagined that
she was hanged, drawn and quartered, or decapitated at the very least.

THE MOAT AT THE TOWER.
We never could see the km of the Tower. As to its defending

No ; in this case they did not "shed her blood, nor scar that whiter ; London.il js all very well on the river side, hut surely the enemy
skin of her's than snow f they only buried her alive. Merciful m,£ht P?P down ^leer-street on the North, or cut along Piccadilly
in the West, while the great guns of the East would be altogether
useless. It is true, that the artillery of the Tower could sweep the
Minories at a moment's notice, and plant a few shells in the very
heart of Rotherhithe. But as the Minories are inhabited by a
peaceful population, and Rotherhithe is not a likely thoroughfare
for an invading army—what the dickins is the use of being able
to blow the inhabitants to atoms in the twinkling of a piece of
ordnance ? We are glad to find, that the humbug of regarding the
Tower as a strong defensive fortress is given up at last, and it has
been resolved to fill up the moat that surrounds it. The fun of
playing at fortifications is rather childish, and the gammon of having
a series of drawbridges, with sentries at each, to guard the access to-
the Tower, is at length to be put an end to. The moat was a farce
even in its best days, for any one might have got across it with a
little ingenuity by dodging the sentinel. We are very glad to hear
that the filling up has been resolved upon.

men !
The order of the Vestals—to the discontent, no doubt, of every
true, truculent, orthodox Roman heathen—was abolished by the
Christian Emperor Theodosius.
The temple of Vesta was round ; it is now generally square ; and
the altar, wherever it used to be placed, is situated underneath the
chimney. The
goddess was
sculptiied in
long Sowing
drapery ; a veil
adorned her
head ; in one
hand she held
a lamp or a two-
eared vessel,
and in the other
a javelin : at
least so it is
written. A
modern fancy
portrait of this
divinity would
more truthfully
but with less
elegance,repre-
sent her as
wearingamorn-
ing-cap, a cot-
ton flowered
dress with the
sleeves tucked
up at the el-
bows, and an
apron of white,
diversified by
several soot-
marks. In her
right hand she
would hold a
spit, in her left
a fish-kettle.
According to
Keightley, Ves-
ta is described
in "the Homer-
idian hymns as
going about the
temple of Apol-
lo atDelphi,her
locks dripping
with liquid oil."
She now goes
about the kit-
chen in a state
not very dissimilar. A poet, however, might, with more refinement,
have represented her as pouring out her oil from a Florence flask.
The learned authority just quoted also mentions, " that mortals
held no banquets at which they did not, at the beginning and end,
pour out ' honey-sweet wine' to llestia, which was the Greek name
of the goddess. That custom has fallen into disuse; but ejaculatory
praises of the performances of the culinary Vesta are still frequently
uttered before and after dinner. They are usually accompanied by
smiles, and smacking of the lips.
By some mythologists Vesta has been confounded with Rhsea,
Ceres, Cybele, Proserpine, Hecate, and Tellus. In the present day,
Mrs. Cook is often confounded, too, with sundry uncomplimentary
epithets, when the mutton is overdone.
There were two individuals worshipped among the ancients under
the name of Vesta. In modern times one only is recognised in well-
regulated families ; it being an axiom which philosophy has
established, and which has been sanctioned by experience, that "Too
nauy cooks spoil the broth."


SBorfis antj Objects cf art.
NOAH'S ARK.
(wklTTF.N WITH AN FYF towards THE PATRONAGE OF THE SOCIETY FOJ< THB
DIFFUSION OF VSEFUL KNOWLEDGE. )

The Ark, of whose construction and contents we are about to
treat, is to be procured for the sum of one shilling.
The architecture of this edifice is simple and unpretending,,
resembling that of a plain modern church, or a barn. In length it
is just five inches, in breadth two ; its shape, therefore, is oblong.
It is four inches in height. It stands upon a piece of wood, flat
above and round below, which projects one inch and three quarters
in front of either end of it, and a little more than a quarter of an
inch on each side. This piece of wood terminates longitudinally in
an equilateral triangle, which is also the figure formed by the roof.
The material of which the structure is composed is Dutch deal,
which has been preferred to oak as being easier to work, much
cheaper, and quite as good for the purpose.
The roof is painted bright red on a chocolate ground, the former
colour being disposed in two parallel strata, with their lower edges
tastefully scolloped. A streak of pale green runs round beneath the
lateral eaves ; under that is a smaller streak of yellow with a line of
reddish brown upon it, and separated by a similar line from the
French pink of the walls and of the upper surface of the floor-piece.
The angles are coped with white, and white bands also run up under
the gable eaves. The windows are black, divided into squares by
white lines, and edged w ith lake ; there are three on either side, and
one at each end, with a black circle, which may also be supposed to
be a window, above it in the gable.
The door is formed by one half of the roof, which lifts up. It
ought to have been in the side ; but then it would have been impos-
sible to put in Noah (who is half as tall as the ark itself), without
poking him head foremost.
The total number of animals contained in the ark is sixty-four.
At this, perhaps, the zoologist may cavil, and allege that the Regent's
Park or the Surrey Gardens could make a better show than that ;
but let him reflect that, to the infant rnind, untutored in arithmetic,
sixty-four creatures are equal to an indefinite quantity, expressible
as " ever so many." Some people, also, will complain that out of
these sixty-four animals there are not above five or six whose
species it is possible to discern ; but such persons are to consider
that this is a mystic toy, and as such, constructed on other and
deeper principles than those of mere imitation. Each of the non-
descripts, being equally like any one out of some hundred different
animals, may be regarded as standing symbolically for the whole
hundred ; and thus, what at first sight appears to be a piece of care-
lessness or ignorance, is seen, on examination, to be the result of
profound design. The creatures with which a child may be pre-
sumed to be acquainted (and where would have been the use of
representing any others ?), are for the most part sufficiently distin-
guishable. We have the horse, the dog, the cat, the cow, the sheep,
the pig, the fox, the stag, poultry, geese, and ducks; the collection
also includes an undeniable elephant and a decided ass. Perhaps
the raven and the dove should have been done a little more accu
rately ; for candour compels us to say that the former, per se, might