DOI issue:
July to December, 1847
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16545#0016
4
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
THE ELECTIONEERING CAULDRON.
Dramatis Person/e.
1st Witch . . . Britannia.
2nd Witch . . . IIibkrnia.
3rd Witch . . • Caledonia.
Macbeth . . • • Lord J—n R—(>s—l.
1st Witch. Seven years Sib, Robert Peel
hath done.
2nd Witch. Three and four Lord John hath
talked.
3rd Witch. The country cries, '"Tis time,
'tis time."
1st Witch.
Round about the caiddron go,
In the seeds of discord throw:
Health of Towns and Education,
Poor-Law, Radway legislation;
Whigs, who shirking work begun,
Courting all and winning none,
Iuto such a mess have got;
Bod ye first i' the charmed pot.
All. Double, double, tod and trouble.
Members spout, and agents bubble.
2nd Witch.
Mr. Meagher's warlike glee,
Lord Monteagle's charity,
Earl op Roden's toleration,
John of Tuam's information,
Smith O'Brien's patriot zeal,
Eloquence of Thomas Steele,
Protestant ascendants' ruth,
Repealers' wisdom, placemen's truth;
Potato blight, and Mortgage-rate,
Deep distrust, and mutual hate,
Ancient springs of Ireland's trouble,
Like soup of Soyer—boil and bubble.
All. Double, double, toil and trouble,
Members spout, and agents bubble.
3rd Witch.
Bigot views v. greater gains,
Sabbath bids v. Sunday trains,
Law of Marriage and Entad,
Packs of grouse 'gainst heads of kail,
The kindly mercies of Kirk Session,
Squabbles of Erec Church profession,
Ross-shire landlords' sense of duty,
Glasgow baillies' sense of beauty,
Hopes of Whig or Tory places,
New-turned coats and double faces-
Last, bait to which both young and auld run,.
Pour bawbees into the cauldron.
All. Double, double, toil and trouble.
Members spout, and agents bubble.
Song (as they dance round the Cauldron).
Russell buff, Bentinck blue,
And Peel neutral grey,
Mingle, mingle, mingle,
Eor mingle you may.
2nd Witch.
In the name of all the " Hums,"
Something Whiggish this way comes !
Open locks, whoever knocks. -
Enter Macbeth.
Much. How now, you cruel, black, and mid-
How is't to go ? [night hags t
I All. That we don't choose to say.
POLITICAL COUETSHIP.
ow like is electioneering to love; canvassing
to courtship ! The professions, the declara-
tions, the vows of the candidates for a
county, are as numerous and ardent as those
of the suitor of an heiress. How similar,
too, are the promises of representatives to-
those of lovers !—pie-crust both. To com-
plete the parallel, nothing is wanting but
Election Intelligence.
It is not known yet for what metropolitan borough the Statue of the
Duke will stand. It is beyond a shadow of a doubt that the Duke will
not retain his seat at the top of the Triumphal Arch al Hyde Park. His
friends are canvassing the Metropolis ; but the largest houses shrink
from offering the Statue any support, for fear of its being afterwards
laid at their door. It is strongly contended, by persons who know
exactly the Statue's calibre, that, supposing it was offered a scat to-mor-
row, its backers never could cany it again to the top of the poll. In
the meantime, if there should be any vacancy in or about London, we ^'i "^SS -V\ " actions for political breach of promise,,
are positive that it could not be better filled tip t han wit h a. member ot p% accompanied by the production of the de-
so much personal weight as the Monster Duke. A\ henever he is ^ - y W^^J^u fendant's letters, which, with a very slight
returned, it is sure to be with a tremendous plumper. >•-<". H exaggeral ion of the prevailing style of such
documents, might run somewhat in the
manner foUowing:—
" My dearest Constituency,
" Yes, my Constituency; for so by
anticipation I will call you. How delicious the feeling that implicit trust
is reposed in us by confiding minds! With what transport I reflect,,
that my adored Constituency believes that I shall never, never betray its-
affections. The time-server, the place-hunter, may flatter only to deceive -r
he canvasses for his own selfish ends; but the object of the aspirations
of the sincere candidate, is sought for itself alone. Yes, my Constitu-
ency, my sole aim is your happiness and welfare. This is the subject
of my daily thoughts, my nightly dreams. Oh! with what pride,
what'joy, shall I rise in St. Stephen's to defend those interests which
are dearer to me than life itself! _
"It will be sweet, in advocating those questions on which we so<
deeply sympathise, to feel that the heart of my Constituency is beating
in unison -with my own. Nor will my pleasure be less m opposing
those of which my own Constituency disapproves. To cherish, to pro-
tect my Constituency through life, to share its tranquillity, to participate-
in its agitation, to divide with it its sorrows and its joys—oh! this
will be Paradise, indeed! Not a wish that my Constituency can breathe-
shad be unattended to ; not a danger that I can avert shad threaten its
beloved privileges. My constant study shall be to render its existence-
one dream of bliss. And when the session's tods are over, how pleasant,
how comfortable it wdl be to meet my idolised Constituency at some
genial banquet, and talk together over our past struggles, and ted the-
tale of my exertions for its benefit and prosperity! Such, such are the
blessings which will attend our happy union.— Oh! may it then be
speedy! May that joyful day be not far distant when, at the hustings,,
we shad exchange those pledges which shall make myself and my Con-
stituency one!
" Haste, then, to the pod. Let no anxious misgivings darken our
sunny future. On this point I have but one fear;—it is, that to become
your representative in Parliament, I shall be too—too—happy. Eare-
wed, my Constituency—my own—my free—my independent; and beheve
me, dearest,
Scene.—Pit door on a Jenny Lind night.
Gentleman (very blandly). "You see, my dear, it's quite impossible to i " Ever your's devotedly attached,
crt in ; it s really no use attempting it : we ll go somewhere else.
Would you like to go to the Haymarket, my love; or where would
you like to go ?"
Lady {very'fiercely). "Home."
Lothario Elamborodgh."
"P.S.—I hope my Constituency is quite wed. Let me recommend
it a little Ale. I have ordered a hogshead of XXXX for it, at the
Gatton Arms."
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
THE ELECTIONEERING CAULDRON.
Dramatis Person/e.
1st Witch . . . Britannia.
2nd Witch . . . IIibkrnia.
3rd Witch . . • Caledonia.
Macbeth . . • • Lord J—n R—(>s—l.
1st Witch. Seven years Sib, Robert Peel
hath done.
2nd Witch. Three and four Lord John hath
talked.
3rd Witch. The country cries, '"Tis time,
'tis time."
1st Witch.
Round about the caiddron go,
In the seeds of discord throw:
Health of Towns and Education,
Poor-Law, Radway legislation;
Whigs, who shirking work begun,
Courting all and winning none,
Iuto such a mess have got;
Bod ye first i' the charmed pot.
All. Double, double, tod and trouble.
Members spout, and agents bubble.
2nd Witch.
Mr. Meagher's warlike glee,
Lord Monteagle's charity,
Earl op Roden's toleration,
John of Tuam's information,
Smith O'Brien's patriot zeal,
Eloquence of Thomas Steele,
Protestant ascendants' ruth,
Repealers' wisdom, placemen's truth;
Potato blight, and Mortgage-rate,
Deep distrust, and mutual hate,
Ancient springs of Ireland's trouble,
Like soup of Soyer—boil and bubble.
All. Double, double, toil and trouble,
Members spout, and agents bubble.
3rd Witch.
Bigot views v. greater gains,
Sabbath bids v. Sunday trains,
Law of Marriage and Entad,
Packs of grouse 'gainst heads of kail,
The kindly mercies of Kirk Session,
Squabbles of Erec Church profession,
Ross-shire landlords' sense of duty,
Glasgow baillies' sense of beauty,
Hopes of Whig or Tory places,
New-turned coats and double faces-
Last, bait to which both young and auld run,.
Pour bawbees into the cauldron.
All. Double, double, toil and trouble.
Members spout, and agents bubble.
Song (as they dance round the Cauldron).
Russell buff, Bentinck blue,
And Peel neutral grey,
Mingle, mingle, mingle,
Eor mingle you may.
2nd Witch.
In the name of all the " Hums,"
Something Whiggish this way comes !
Open locks, whoever knocks. -
Enter Macbeth.
Much. How now, you cruel, black, and mid-
How is't to go ? [night hags t
I All. That we don't choose to say.
POLITICAL COUETSHIP.
ow like is electioneering to love; canvassing
to courtship ! The professions, the declara-
tions, the vows of the candidates for a
county, are as numerous and ardent as those
of the suitor of an heiress. How similar,
too, are the promises of representatives to-
those of lovers !—pie-crust both. To com-
plete the parallel, nothing is wanting but
Election Intelligence.
It is not known yet for what metropolitan borough the Statue of the
Duke will stand. It is beyond a shadow of a doubt that the Duke will
not retain his seat at the top of the Triumphal Arch al Hyde Park. His
friends are canvassing the Metropolis ; but the largest houses shrink
from offering the Statue any support, for fear of its being afterwards
laid at their door. It is strongly contended, by persons who know
exactly the Statue's calibre, that, supposing it was offered a scat to-mor-
row, its backers never could cany it again to the top of the poll. In
the meantime, if there should be any vacancy in or about London, we ^'i "^SS -V\ " actions for political breach of promise,,
are positive that it could not be better filled tip t han wit h a. member ot p% accompanied by the production of the de-
so much personal weight as the Monster Duke. A\ henever he is ^ - y W^^J^u fendant's letters, which, with a very slight
returned, it is sure to be with a tremendous plumper. >•-<". H exaggeral ion of the prevailing style of such
documents, might run somewhat in the
manner foUowing:—
" My dearest Constituency,
" Yes, my Constituency; for so by
anticipation I will call you. How delicious the feeling that implicit trust
is reposed in us by confiding minds! With what transport I reflect,,
that my adored Constituency believes that I shall never, never betray its-
affections. The time-server, the place-hunter, may flatter only to deceive -r
he canvasses for his own selfish ends; but the object of the aspirations
of the sincere candidate, is sought for itself alone. Yes, my Constitu-
ency, my sole aim is your happiness and welfare. This is the subject
of my daily thoughts, my nightly dreams. Oh! with what pride,
what'joy, shall I rise in St. Stephen's to defend those interests which
are dearer to me than life itself! _
"It will be sweet, in advocating those questions on which we so<
deeply sympathise, to feel that the heart of my Constituency is beating
in unison -with my own. Nor will my pleasure be less m opposing
those of which my own Constituency disapproves. To cherish, to pro-
tect my Constituency through life, to share its tranquillity, to participate-
in its agitation, to divide with it its sorrows and its joys—oh! this
will be Paradise, indeed! Not a wish that my Constituency can breathe-
shad be unattended to ; not a danger that I can avert shad threaten its
beloved privileges. My constant study shall be to render its existence-
one dream of bliss. And when the session's tods are over, how pleasant,
how comfortable it wdl be to meet my idolised Constituency at some
genial banquet, and talk together over our past struggles, and ted the-
tale of my exertions for its benefit and prosperity! Such, such are the
blessings which will attend our happy union.— Oh! may it then be
speedy! May that joyful day be not far distant when, at the hustings,,
we shad exchange those pledges which shall make myself and my Con-
stituency one!
" Haste, then, to the pod. Let no anxious misgivings darken our
sunny future. On this point I have but one fear;—it is, that to become
your representative in Parliament, I shall be too—too—happy. Eare-
wed, my Constituency—my own—my free—my independent; and beheve
me, dearest,
Scene.—Pit door on a Jenny Lind night.
Gentleman (very blandly). "You see, my dear, it's quite impossible to i " Ever your's devotedly attached,
crt in ; it s really no use attempting it : we ll go somewhere else.
Would you like to go to the Haymarket, my love; or where would
you like to go ?"
Lady {very'fiercely). "Home."
Lothario Elamborodgh."
"P.S.—I hope my Constituency is quite wed. Let me recommend
it a little Ale. I have ordered a hogshead of XXXX for it, at the
Gatton Arms."