Punch: Punch (15.1848)

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

PUNCH'S POEMS OF PARLIAMENT.

The Political Babes in the Wood.

ow ponder well, you statesmen deare,

The wordes which I shall write ;
A doleful storie you shall heare,

With moral obvious quite.
The Whigs, a race of good account,

Held Downing Street of late,
And did in honor most, surmount
Who've fill'd that ticklish state.

One of this blood, grown grey in place,

The Commonweale to save,
Of boroughs close the rotten race

Still closer vowed to shave ;
So the Reform Bille he did passe,

With Radicals combiued,
And then himselfe passed hence, alas!
But lefte two babes behinde.

Russell the one, his father's joye,

Of speeche right quicke and bolde;
MoRfETir the next, a maiden coy,

Framed in Listonian molde.
For legacie these prettie babes
Had from their father deare
Great, credite, and bills falling due,
For many a coming yeare.

Then Hume, his brother radicallc,
Bespake the grandsire, Grey—
"Be kinde unto my children smalle,

When I am passed awaye ;
Helpe them to keep, like brother true,

The credit that I leave;
Nor let. my billes be overdue,
Lest so my babes shoulde grieve."

This speech did then that brother make,

To that, olde gentleman—
" I '11 tend your babies for your sake,

The best that e'er [ can ;
So may I keepe my seate so deare,

And never change my coate,
As I will aide your children here,
With speeche and eke with vote."

Their parent being past and gone,

These babes in task he takes
To teache, but when his teachinge's done,

Thereof small profit makes.
He had not had these babes in hand

Twelve sessions and a daye,
When he doth find them ever stand
Right grievouse in his waye.

So with two ruffians he did speake,

That were of ruthlesse moode,
That they shoulde take these children weake,

And slaye them in a woode.
One of these ruffians Cobden Right,

The other Peele, his friende,
To what the firste his troth did plight,
The last his aide would lende.

Awaye these pretty babes they bore

Full innocente of minde,
Deeming that all was righte before,

And nothing wrong behinde.
They prate and prattle pleasantlie,

And wonder while they playe,
Why that these men should ride so fast,
So rough and long a waye.

But nought this pretty speech they had,

Made those stern hearts relent;
The men vhat undertook the deed

Were not men to repent.
Till Peele, the one less hard of heart,
Shrunk somewhat from his charge,
Tho' knowing, if they're slain, his part
Of the reward were large.

The other won't agree thereto,

So falle they to debate,
As fiercely as old friends wilL/loe,

Aboute those babies' fate :
Till he that was of mildest moode

At last did have his waye ;
These babes, that nothing understoode,

They deemed it was but playe.

He took the babies by Ihe hande,

That still like babes behave,
And bade them straightwaie follow him,

Would they their bacon save.
But aye the faster he led on,

They followed aye more slowe:
" Nay," quoth he, " an you Ml go alone,

Stay till you wiser growe."

These helpless babes, with hand in hand,

Went wandering up and downe,
But never more came back the man

That thus had done them browne.
In vain out of their hapless plighte

To find their waie they tried,
And when they sawe the darksome nighte,

They sat them downe and cried.

Thus flounder'd on these innocents

From pillar unto post.e,
Till piteouslie they rendered up

Their smalle official ghoste.
No sorrowing worde this pretty paire

Of any man receives.
Till Mr. Punch most piously

Embalmed them in his leaves!