DOI Heft:
July to December, 1850
DOI Seite / Zitierlink:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16606#0070
62
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON
CHARIVARI
GENEROSITY TO POOR SOLDIERS.
correspondent of the
Times, in the subjoined
passage, has invited pub-
lic attention to a pretty
graceful act on the part
of the House of Com-
mons, and to a judicious,
considerate, feeling, re-
mark on that of the
Secsetary-at-War:—
" The House of Commons
on Friday, "with but one dis-
sentient, agreed that the pri-
vate soldier who had earned a
good-conduct medal should be
mulcted of one week's payor
more out of his scanty wages
as the condition of his obtain-
ing the certificate of honour.
The Secretary-at-War, with
that nonchalance so usual in
a rich man when he treats of
the out-goings of the poorer,
says, ' u is no great exac-
tion.' "
It would be "no great
exaction" to deprive
poor soldiers of their
week's pay, eh, Mr. Pox
Maxjle ? No great ex-
action ; no, only a little
one. Well then, perhaps
it would be no great
generosity, flight Ho-
nourable Sir, if you were to subscribe a week's salary towards finding them medals
gratis. In that case, the men may be willing to keep the baubles; otherwise, it is
probable they will be inclined to sell them for what they will fetch. And it would,
no doubt, pay any enterprising speculator to buy them up, and send them over
to some country ill-disposed towards us, to be hawked about as curiosities—sold
as extraordinary illustrations of British meanness.
RAPID ACT OP ASSMANSHIP.
There is at present such a glut of the balloon-market, that the aeronauts are
jostling each other in the air, and the veteran Green's car is stopping the way
of the car of the veteran Graham. A mere act of simple straightforward balloon-
ing has, however, lost its effect on the public mind, which refuses to be aroused
by anything less exciting than an aeronaut on horseback, who runs a fearful risk
of being sent on the same journey that a beggar is said to be likely to take, when
he turns equestrian.
Last week the veteran Green was announced to ascend in a balloon on horse-
back ; and when the evening came, a poor little pony was brought forward,
with his legs stuck into sockets—like a couple of pairs of candlesticks—and the
veteran, supporting his feet upon a pile of ballast-bags, ascended in the balloon
with the animal between his legs; but resting none of his weight on the dimi-
nutive quadruped. The whole affair was a piece of child's play, which would
have been much more complete, and far less disagreeable, if the sensible advice of
Mr. Norton, the Lambeth Magistrate, had been taken, and a wooden horse had
been used, instead of a real pony.
If the veteran Green must have his hobby, let it be a hobby in the strict sense
of the word, and he will then spare the feelings of the Society for the Prevention
of Cruelty to the Dumb Species. The air is not the proper element for eques-
trian performances, nor ought an attempt to be made to get up a rivalry to
Astley's in the skies above the suburbs.
BONNYCASTLE AND BROADCLOTH.
There is doubtless an affinity between weights and measures, but the substi-
tution of tailors' weights for tailors' measures—a state_ of things to which we
are approaching—will have in it something rather peculiar. The advertisements
now continually inform us that we may purchase paletots weighing only so many
ounces, and we shall soon be expected to buy our clothes by the pound, as we do
our tea and sugar. We shall be sending to our tailors shortly for such and such a
quantity of mixed garments, including so many ounces of strong boys' black,
and a quarter-of-a-pound or so of green, or any other serviceable colour. The
cheap tailoring, like the cheap tea-dealing, leads, of course, to the introduction of
a quantity of spurious trash, and we recommend the public not to try more than
an ounce at a time of those articles which they see announced in the puffing
advertisements.
Hear!_ Hear!—We don't wonder at the delay in getting through the Appeal
ousiness in the House of Lords, notwithstanding the activity of Lord Brougham,
for in that house everything is very hard of hearing.
THE MINISTER TO HIS MAJORITY.
Air—"Haul away, yoho. Boys!" Nautical Melody.
The House of Commons has a knack,
Vote away, yoho, boys !
Of piling loads on John Bell's back,
To any height, you know, boys.
Come, put your motion; sure am I,
If we can't get it, still we '11 try
To make Old England's money fly;
Vote away, yoho, boys!
With twelve thousand, yearly paid,
Vote away, yoho, boys !
Cambridge is a happy blade;
And you have made him so, boys,
Now stables for the Prince_ op Wales
To build, another grant entails;
We want the cash—ne'er mind who rails—
Vote away, yoho, boys!
The other Royal infants too,
Vote away, yoho, boys !
Must be provided for by you,
As they increase and grow, boys,
Strip needy clerks—skin any flint—
But never Prince or Princess stint.
Vote—though their pensions break the mint—
Vote away, yoho, boys!
Por odious acts of every kind,
Vote away, yoho, boys !
And public feeling, never mind,
Nor outcries of " Oh, oh ! " boys.
Pass any Sabbatarian bill,
Inflict whatever bore you will;
And—till the cup you over-fill—
Vote awayr, yoho, boys!
BALLOON SCIENTIPIC PREPARATIONS POR
THE ENSUING WEEK.
Monday. The veteran Green will ascend on the veteran
tortoise (aged 197 years), lately arrived at the Zoological
Gardens.
Tuesday. Mr. Barry, the Clown, will mount on a donkey,
and sing " Hot Codlhis " at the altitude of 600 feet.
Wednesday. The veteran Green will, in the character ol
an old witch, mount on a broom, and dance the witches'
dance in the air„
Thursday. Lieutenant Gale will disguise himself as the
Courier of St. Petersburg, and ascend on the backs of six
blind horses.
Friday. Mrs. Graham, or Madame Wharton, will
make her ascent on horseback as Lady Godiva.
Saturday. Grand race between six balloons with six
horses, and six balloons with six donkeys. N.B.—None
but English donkeys allowed to compete.
Peel and Wordsworth.
Statues and monuments of many kinds are to be erected
to the memory of Peel. We rejoice thereat; and, rejoicing,
wish the number doubled. But how about Wordsworth ?
No monument to him—or only one at most ? Shelley
has called poets " the unacknowledged legislators of man-
kind." Wordsworth has been a most potent legislator,
something more than M. P. for Rydal Mount. Nevertheless,
as only being a legislator in print, and not in Parliament, he
is a legislator unacknowledged. Lord John proposes no
statue for him.
the statesman's dream.
Alderman Humphery, in the course of a debate on the
new House of Commons, said, that, in consequence of its
limited accommodation, Members would often go out to take
a nap in the Library. We are quite sure that no Member
anxious for a nap will take the trouble to go out into the
Library. He, will merely keep his seat during a debate, and
exhausted nature will soon find repose.
Parliamentary Almanack.—Latter end of July,
" Pairing " time begins.
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON
CHARIVARI
GENEROSITY TO POOR SOLDIERS.
correspondent of the
Times, in the subjoined
passage, has invited pub-
lic attention to a pretty
graceful act on the part
of the House of Com-
mons, and to a judicious,
considerate, feeling, re-
mark on that of the
Secsetary-at-War:—
" The House of Commons
on Friday, "with but one dis-
sentient, agreed that the pri-
vate soldier who had earned a
good-conduct medal should be
mulcted of one week's payor
more out of his scanty wages
as the condition of his obtain-
ing the certificate of honour.
The Secretary-at-War, with
that nonchalance so usual in
a rich man when he treats of
the out-goings of the poorer,
says, ' u is no great exac-
tion.' "
It would be "no great
exaction" to deprive
poor soldiers of their
week's pay, eh, Mr. Pox
Maxjle ? No great ex-
action ; no, only a little
one. Well then, perhaps
it would be no great
generosity, flight Ho-
nourable Sir, if you were to subscribe a week's salary towards finding them medals
gratis. In that case, the men may be willing to keep the baubles; otherwise, it is
probable they will be inclined to sell them for what they will fetch. And it would,
no doubt, pay any enterprising speculator to buy them up, and send them over
to some country ill-disposed towards us, to be hawked about as curiosities—sold
as extraordinary illustrations of British meanness.
RAPID ACT OP ASSMANSHIP.
There is at present such a glut of the balloon-market, that the aeronauts are
jostling each other in the air, and the veteran Green's car is stopping the way
of the car of the veteran Graham. A mere act of simple straightforward balloon-
ing has, however, lost its effect on the public mind, which refuses to be aroused
by anything less exciting than an aeronaut on horseback, who runs a fearful risk
of being sent on the same journey that a beggar is said to be likely to take, when
he turns equestrian.
Last week the veteran Green was announced to ascend in a balloon on horse-
back ; and when the evening came, a poor little pony was brought forward,
with his legs stuck into sockets—like a couple of pairs of candlesticks—and the
veteran, supporting his feet upon a pile of ballast-bags, ascended in the balloon
with the animal between his legs; but resting none of his weight on the dimi-
nutive quadruped. The whole affair was a piece of child's play, which would
have been much more complete, and far less disagreeable, if the sensible advice of
Mr. Norton, the Lambeth Magistrate, had been taken, and a wooden horse had
been used, instead of a real pony.
If the veteran Green must have his hobby, let it be a hobby in the strict sense
of the word, and he will then spare the feelings of the Society for the Prevention
of Cruelty to the Dumb Species. The air is not the proper element for eques-
trian performances, nor ought an attempt to be made to get up a rivalry to
Astley's in the skies above the suburbs.
BONNYCASTLE AND BROADCLOTH.
There is doubtless an affinity between weights and measures, but the substi-
tution of tailors' weights for tailors' measures—a state_ of things to which we
are approaching—will have in it something rather peculiar. The advertisements
now continually inform us that we may purchase paletots weighing only so many
ounces, and we shall soon be expected to buy our clothes by the pound, as we do
our tea and sugar. We shall be sending to our tailors shortly for such and such a
quantity of mixed garments, including so many ounces of strong boys' black,
and a quarter-of-a-pound or so of green, or any other serviceable colour. The
cheap tailoring, like the cheap tea-dealing, leads, of course, to the introduction of
a quantity of spurious trash, and we recommend the public not to try more than
an ounce at a time of those articles which they see announced in the puffing
advertisements.
Hear!_ Hear!—We don't wonder at the delay in getting through the Appeal
ousiness in the House of Lords, notwithstanding the activity of Lord Brougham,
for in that house everything is very hard of hearing.
THE MINISTER TO HIS MAJORITY.
Air—"Haul away, yoho. Boys!" Nautical Melody.
The House of Commons has a knack,
Vote away, yoho, boys !
Of piling loads on John Bell's back,
To any height, you know, boys.
Come, put your motion; sure am I,
If we can't get it, still we '11 try
To make Old England's money fly;
Vote away, yoho, boys!
With twelve thousand, yearly paid,
Vote away, yoho, boys !
Cambridge is a happy blade;
And you have made him so, boys,
Now stables for the Prince_ op Wales
To build, another grant entails;
We want the cash—ne'er mind who rails—
Vote away, yoho, boys!
The other Royal infants too,
Vote away, yoho, boys !
Must be provided for by you,
As they increase and grow, boys,
Strip needy clerks—skin any flint—
But never Prince or Princess stint.
Vote—though their pensions break the mint—
Vote away, yoho, boys!
Por odious acts of every kind,
Vote away, yoho, boys !
And public feeling, never mind,
Nor outcries of " Oh, oh ! " boys.
Pass any Sabbatarian bill,
Inflict whatever bore you will;
And—till the cup you over-fill—
Vote awayr, yoho, boys!
BALLOON SCIENTIPIC PREPARATIONS POR
THE ENSUING WEEK.
Monday. The veteran Green will ascend on the veteran
tortoise (aged 197 years), lately arrived at the Zoological
Gardens.
Tuesday. Mr. Barry, the Clown, will mount on a donkey,
and sing " Hot Codlhis " at the altitude of 600 feet.
Wednesday. The veteran Green will, in the character ol
an old witch, mount on a broom, and dance the witches'
dance in the air„
Thursday. Lieutenant Gale will disguise himself as the
Courier of St. Petersburg, and ascend on the backs of six
blind horses.
Friday. Mrs. Graham, or Madame Wharton, will
make her ascent on horseback as Lady Godiva.
Saturday. Grand race between six balloons with six
horses, and six balloons with six donkeys. N.B.—None
but English donkeys allowed to compete.
Peel and Wordsworth.
Statues and monuments of many kinds are to be erected
to the memory of Peel. We rejoice thereat; and, rejoicing,
wish the number doubled. But how about Wordsworth ?
No monument to him—or only one at most ? Shelley
has called poets " the unacknowledged legislators of man-
kind." Wordsworth has been a most potent legislator,
something more than M. P. for Rydal Mount. Nevertheless,
as only being a legislator in print, and not in Parliament, he
is a legislator unacknowledged. Lord John proposes no
statue for him.
the statesman's dream.
Alderman Humphery, in the course of a debate on the
new House of Commons, said, that, in consequence of its
limited accommodation, Members would often go out to take
a nap in the Library. We are quite sure that no Member
anxious for a nap will take the trouble to go out into the
Library. He, will merely keep his seat during a debate, and
exhausted nature will soon find repose.
Parliamentary Almanack.—Latter end of July,
" Pairing " time begins.