Punch: Punch (21.1851)

84

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI

MR. PUNCH'S REVIEW OF THE SESSION.

Now, August arriving, by dint of contriving,

The Bills are shoved on with unwonted progression;
Till in part by hard working, and partly by burking,_

The Commons have managed to wind up the Session.
A short retrospection may lead to reflection

On the sum of performance, compared with profession:
So as popular leaders, we call on our readers

To follow us through a slight sketch of the Session.

We'd best make the most of our one Bill to boast of,

That slap on the face given to Papal Aggression;
And that once recorded, and praise for't awarded,

One scarce knows what else we have got from the Session.
The old Income-Tax, Sir, is still on our backs, Sir,

(And it's not Sir Charles Wood's fault we haven't a fresh 'un)
And for Window-Tax gone, Sir, there's House-Tax laid on, Sir;

And that's the financial great coup of the Session.

If Smithfield's demolish'd, our sewers aren't abolish'd;

We've the Water Monopolists still in possession,
And must still take Thames sewage for drink and for brewage;

And the question of Water's hung up for the Session.
The dead are still hurried through the streets to be buried

In graveyards pack'd tight at a Sexton's discretion,
And the Board of Health can't act, when told that it shan't act:

And such are the sanit'ry gains of the Session.

There was much talk of movement towards legal improvement,

Of quick'ning the Chancery ra e of progression,
And Barristers leading, on Practice and Pleading,

In Commission have sat for the whole of the Session ;
But this incubation, of lengthen'd duration,

View'd with so much alarm by the Learned Profession,
Has produced nought as yet, Sir—and the good we may get, Sir

Whatever it be, can't be scored to the Session.

When promised a Jew Bill, we thought 'twas a true bill.

And hoped to see Rothschild in quiet possession
Of his seat in the House, Sir, but the hope was a chouss, Sir,

For, thanks to the Lords, that's put off for the Session !
So, instead of one Jew, Sir, we now have got two, Sir,

To make a still louder appeal 'gainst oppression ;
And City votes hustle poor dear Lord John Russell,

To take up once again his dropped Bill of the Session.

On the whole, looking back, Sir, one feels there's a lack, Sir,

(1 think one may say so without indiscretion,)
Of much to be proud of, or boast very loud of,

In all that's been done through the whole of the Session.
But there's one consolation for Punch and the Nation,

If one turns from performance away to profession,
The less that's done now, Sir, the more, you'll allow, Sir,

Is left for that wonderful period—next Session.

REFORM REMOVING THE BANDAGE FROM THE EYES OF JUSTICE.

Sad Want of Reflection.

The gallant Colonel, whose name will be given upon inquiry at the
office, if required, has declared his doubt as to whether the Exhibition
Building is really of glass; for he insists on its being quite impossible
that he should see himself in it. We must confess our surprise at this
assertion, considering the number of reflections cast upon the Crystal
Palace by the gallant Colonel himself.

Vapour.

Mr. Urqtjhart gave notice that next Session he should move "for
the establishment of Public Vapour Baths." This looks something like
a job. Does Mr. Urqtjhart wish to be nominated the head of the
new establishment ? In justice to the Hon. Gentleman we must say
we know of no head so well qualified in all matters connected with
Vapour as his own !