DOI issue:
July to December, 1851
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16608#0243
232
PUNCH. OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI
THE BLOOMERS TO THE TAILORS
pkouse ye, each bold
Tailor;
'Tis Woman claims
your aid;
The craven that
would fail her,
Oh scout him from
your trade !
'Gainst Prejudice and
Fashion
Go, gallant cham-
pions, go;
Knights of the Thim
Brandish your trusty scissors
Till coat and vest are done,
And, spite of gibing quizzers,
The Bloomer prize is won !
AZAEL! AZAEL!
Attracted by the promise of a spectacle, with not only "new
scenery, dresses, and decorations;" but with "new camels, zebras,
Brahmin buiio," and " everything which can tend to give reality to the
scene," we proceeded over Westminster Bridge, to the Banks of the
Nile, and entering, a few doors down on the right, we proceeded
straight on till we found ourselves opposite " the Renowned and Vast
Square of Memphis." On reference to our hand-book, or play-bill, we
perceived that the " Memphian Games " were supposed to be going on ;
and in one corner of the square, on a small wooden platform, three feet
six, by two feet nine, we observed three men, engaged in playing at
nothing for nothing, with some blank dice, which were vehemently
shaken up in a tin mug without a handle. While the games were at
their height, a procession made its appearance, headed bv Egyptian
warriors, who, it is to be hoped, were on the retired list, and not likely
to be called into active service ; for their shields were of about the size
and quality of paper kites, and their only armour was a sort of square
fan-tail, or "curtain," as the ladies call it, of cloth, attached to the
back of their dark woollen night-caps. These were followed by
priests, in white night-gowns, that ought to have been down to their
heels; but as one very tall priest had accidentally exchanged night-
gowns with one very short priest, the former made palpable the fact,
that the legs ol the whole of the priests were encased in long leather
gaiters.
The procession introduces, of course, the whole of that "unrivalled
collection of rare animals," which is always dragged, kicked, poked, and
pinched through every quarter of the globe, in which the Astleian
authors lay the scenes of their spectacles. Our old and refractory
friends, the two stags without tails, writhe through the grand square of
Memphis, as uncomfortably as they wriggle over the Steppes of Tartary
m Mazeppa; or sidle about, among the thumps and shoves of a hostile
soldiery m theWars of Afghanistan. "The Golden Altar with the
undying riire is certainly a gorgeous affair; but on the night we saw
it, the tow was either damp, or the spirits-of-wine deficient, which
caused the undying tire" to be very speedily at the point of death,
and it went out rather early m a blaze of anything but triumph The
procession had scarcely ended when Azael enters, on a clever spotted
cob, and expresses a desire to witness " the gorgeyus cerimonies " He
is, without much ceremony, dragged on to the platform, where the
vigorous game at nothing is still going on, and having taken his turn at
l.he tin mug, and thrown out from it the blank dice, ne rushes into the
middle of the stage, declaring he has "lost everything," which signifies
little, as he had nothing—not even a carpet-bag—on his arrival.
An attempt is then made upon his fidelity by a young lady in p;nk
and spangles, who, in a grand pas de fascination, hops away, or
beckons him on, in the approved fashion of the ballet. He endeavours
to win her good graces by captivating attitudes, clasping his hands,
turning up his eyes, drawing his fingers down his face; then with one
of his arms supporting her waist, while the other arm forms the
segment of a circle above her head. All is vain, and taking from a
supernumerary, who enters, a square tea-cadddy, he offers it as an in-
ducement to the young female, who rejects not only that, but a comforter
for the neck, which he also tenders in the tenderest manner. His suit
appears quite hopeless; but it appears from his proceedings that he
cherishes a certain scarf, which he keeps alternately pressing to his heart
and his lips, though in reality his nose seems to get it oftenest, and to
, make the best use of it. The young woman in spangles playfully takes
ble, dash on | it away from him, when he goes nearly mad, and tears out of his hair
To the Ladies' j the little rosette of pink ribbon with which it has been trimmed,
rescue, ho! i buries his face in his fists, and ultimately so misbehaves himself that he
is ordered to be thrown into the Nile as a sacrifice. Six priests are
As loutu pursues preparing to lead him away, when he seizes an axe of pantomimic
his pleasures, dimensions, foolishly left within his grasp, and begins flourishing it about
So rush ye to your , t^e De wildered heads of the Memphian clergy. Suddenly he lays down the
. bsts ; i axe> an(j at the same tjme iayS down the axiom, that "the cold heart
Gripe ye your trusty can never fee^" and he announces tne fact of his readiness for the
measures _ | jjju »fts icy bosom crammed to the very brim with hungry
Right closely in crocodiies»
your lists. Inthe
ensuing act we come to the "Mighty Desert," consisting of a
forward! the bodkin pair 0f fiats, with a large round mark in the centre of the landscape.
n !ug'f, ■ Tuis mark> whicQ at first struck us as one of tne. "Mysteries of
Or needle nrm in MempnjS)» was s00n explained when a carpenter's whistle was heard,
rri rKSt' t an(* tue landscape opened to the extent of the round mark, in order
lhe heart ot valour tllat jzael—who has survived submersion in the Nile, and found the
w-V+i u crocodiles rather more benevolent, or abstemious, than he expected—
W ith the goose be-, may wjtness the appearance of the Dream Spirit. Azael expresses a
fore the breast. | to g0 -n searc£ 0f nis father; but, instead of doing so, he goes
through som« difficult contortions, dragging himself along the ground,
tottering a little way in one direction, and then staggering back again—
TW »aTm»«f lT«,™ tu n^ftV, his movements requiring the most violent exertion and great physical,
T&S ™™lSZ%if™,,! strength-when, after having wasted as much time and strength as
Now worn by Man alone ! VQnl| have tak'en him a mfle at least on his way, he declares his
inability to move a step further. He is, somehow or other, dragged oil,
when his venerable father appears in a wig of black velvet, with a smalL
blue piping run through it here and there, to give it a dash of grey—the
result of two whole acts of suffering. _ Being an agriculturist-, his
presence is required at a harvest festival, represented by about a
quarter of a truss of real straw and a dozen painted haycocks.
The son and the father meet; but as the son's wardrobe has dwindled
to a suit of fleshings and a door-mat, the father does not know him, and
is going through the usual preliminaries to a stage recognition by
tottering backwards, when a cry from a benevolent "wag" in the
gallery, of " Come, come, hold up, old man—hold up! " restores the
broken-hearted parent to a consciousness of the necessity for preserving
the perpendicular. Everybody, of course, rushes into everybody's
arms, the scarf is hugged and kissed, the old man's black velvet hair,
piped with blue, is parted on his forehead by his enraptured son, and
by the aid of a magic lantern—happily at hand in " the Peaceful Valley"
—there is a Grand " Superhuman reappearance of the Nocturnal Vision
of the Desert."
Our account of Azael, at Astley's, may be somewhat too literal for
those of a poetic imagination; but when we say that it is gorgeously got
up, with all the liberality and spirit of an Astley's management, we are
sure we shall send many more to the theatre than we shall deter from
going there, by our very common-place view of an uncommonly mag-
nificent spectacle.
Yes, onward with your stitches,
'Till Beauty gains her own,
NOTES AND QUERIES EOR COMMUNISTS AND RED
REPUBLICANS.
A Correspondent wishes to know how and whence could have origi-
nated so extraordinary a proposition as the dogma that " property is
theft." Erom the circumstance, we should say, that the gentleman
who first propounded it, had no idea of acquiring anything except by
stealing.
Another Correspondent casts a doubt on the correctness of the or-
thography of the word " Rouges," the Erench name for the ultra-
republicans, and by us translated " Reds." He suggests that " Rouges,"
as applied to the party of disorder, is a corruption of an Anglicism, to
be rectified by the transposition of two letters : and inquires whether
it should not be properly spelt " Rogues."
how to treat electors.
It has been suggested, that the voters of St. Albans should be put
up to auction. Certainly • and all of them knocked down.
PUNCH. OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI
THE BLOOMERS TO THE TAILORS
pkouse ye, each bold
Tailor;
'Tis Woman claims
your aid;
The craven that
would fail her,
Oh scout him from
your trade !
'Gainst Prejudice and
Fashion
Go, gallant cham-
pions, go;
Knights of the Thim
Brandish your trusty scissors
Till coat and vest are done,
And, spite of gibing quizzers,
The Bloomer prize is won !
AZAEL! AZAEL!
Attracted by the promise of a spectacle, with not only "new
scenery, dresses, and decorations;" but with "new camels, zebras,
Brahmin buiio," and " everything which can tend to give reality to the
scene," we proceeded over Westminster Bridge, to the Banks of the
Nile, and entering, a few doors down on the right, we proceeded
straight on till we found ourselves opposite " the Renowned and Vast
Square of Memphis." On reference to our hand-book, or play-bill, we
perceived that the " Memphian Games " were supposed to be going on ;
and in one corner of the square, on a small wooden platform, three feet
six, by two feet nine, we observed three men, engaged in playing at
nothing for nothing, with some blank dice, which were vehemently
shaken up in a tin mug without a handle. While the games were at
their height, a procession made its appearance, headed bv Egyptian
warriors, who, it is to be hoped, were on the retired list, and not likely
to be called into active service ; for their shields were of about the size
and quality of paper kites, and their only armour was a sort of square
fan-tail, or "curtain," as the ladies call it, of cloth, attached to the
back of their dark woollen night-caps. These were followed by
priests, in white night-gowns, that ought to have been down to their
heels; but as one very tall priest had accidentally exchanged night-
gowns with one very short priest, the former made palpable the fact,
that the legs ol the whole of the priests were encased in long leather
gaiters.
The procession introduces, of course, the whole of that "unrivalled
collection of rare animals," which is always dragged, kicked, poked, and
pinched through every quarter of the globe, in which the Astleian
authors lay the scenes of their spectacles. Our old and refractory
friends, the two stags without tails, writhe through the grand square of
Memphis, as uncomfortably as they wriggle over the Steppes of Tartary
m Mazeppa; or sidle about, among the thumps and shoves of a hostile
soldiery m theWars of Afghanistan. "The Golden Altar with the
undying riire is certainly a gorgeous affair; but on the night we saw
it, the tow was either damp, or the spirits-of-wine deficient, which
caused the undying tire" to be very speedily at the point of death,
and it went out rather early m a blaze of anything but triumph The
procession had scarcely ended when Azael enters, on a clever spotted
cob, and expresses a desire to witness " the gorgeyus cerimonies " He
is, without much ceremony, dragged on to the platform, where the
vigorous game at nothing is still going on, and having taken his turn at
l.he tin mug, and thrown out from it the blank dice, ne rushes into the
middle of the stage, declaring he has "lost everything," which signifies
little, as he had nothing—not even a carpet-bag—on his arrival.
An attempt is then made upon his fidelity by a young lady in p;nk
and spangles, who, in a grand pas de fascination, hops away, or
beckons him on, in the approved fashion of the ballet. He endeavours
to win her good graces by captivating attitudes, clasping his hands,
turning up his eyes, drawing his fingers down his face; then with one
of his arms supporting her waist, while the other arm forms the
segment of a circle above her head. All is vain, and taking from a
supernumerary, who enters, a square tea-cadddy, he offers it as an in-
ducement to the young female, who rejects not only that, but a comforter
for the neck, which he also tenders in the tenderest manner. His suit
appears quite hopeless; but it appears from his proceedings that he
cherishes a certain scarf, which he keeps alternately pressing to his heart
and his lips, though in reality his nose seems to get it oftenest, and to
, make the best use of it. The young woman in spangles playfully takes
ble, dash on | it away from him, when he goes nearly mad, and tears out of his hair
To the Ladies' j the little rosette of pink ribbon with which it has been trimmed,
rescue, ho! i buries his face in his fists, and ultimately so misbehaves himself that he
is ordered to be thrown into the Nile as a sacrifice. Six priests are
As loutu pursues preparing to lead him away, when he seizes an axe of pantomimic
his pleasures, dimensions, foolishly left within his grasp, and begins flourishing it about
So rush ye to your , t^e De wildered heads of the Memphian clergy. Suddenly he lays down the
. bsts ; i axe> an(j at the same tjme iayS down the axiom, that "the cold heart
Gripe ye your trusty can never fee^" and he announces tne fact of his readiness for the
measures _ | jjju »fts icy bosom crammed to the very brim with hungry
Right closely in crocodiies»
your lists. Inthe
ensuing act we come to the "Mighty Desert," consisting of a
forward! the bodkin pair 0f fiats, with a large round mark in the centre of the landscape.
n !ug'f, ■ Tuis mark> whicQ at first struck us as one of tne. "Mysteries of
Or needle nrm in MempnjS)» was s00n explained when a carpenter's whistle was heard,
rri rKSt' t an(* tue landscape opened to the extent of the round mark, in order
lhe heart ot valour tllat jzael—who has survived submersion in the Nile, and found the
w-V+i u crocodiles rather more benevolent, or abstemious, than he expected—
W ith the goose be-, may wjtness the appearance of the Dream Spirit. Azael expresses a
fore the breast. | to g0 -n searc£ 0f nis father; but, instead of doing so, he goes
through som« difficult contortions, dragging himself along the ground,
tottering a little way in one direction, and then staggering back again—
TW »aTm»«f lT«,™ tu n^ftV, his movements requiring the most violent exertion and great physical,
T&S ™™lSZ%if™,,! strength-when, after having wasted as much time and strength as
Now worn by Man alone ! VQnl| have tak'en him a mfle at least on his way, he declares his
inability to move a step further. He is, somehow or other, dragged oil,
when his venerable father appears in a wig of black velvet, with a smalL
blue piping run through it here and there, to give it a dash of grey—the
result of two whole acts of suffering. _ Being an agriculturist-, his
presence is required at a harvest festival, represented by about a
quarter of a truss of real straw and a dozen painted haycocks.
The son and the father meet; but as the son's wardrobe has dwindled
to a suit of fleshings and a door-mat, the father does not know him, and
is going through the usual preliminaries to a stage recognition by
tottering backwards, when a cry from a benevolent "wag" in the
gallery, of " Come, come, hold up, old man—hold up! " restores the
broken-hearted parent to a consciousness of the necessity for preserving
the perpendicular. Everybody, of course, rushes into everybody's
arms, the scarf is hugged and kissed, the old man's black velvet hair,
piped with blue, is parted on his forehead by his enraptured son, and
by the aid of a magic lantern—happily at hand in " the Peaceful Valley"
—there is a Grand " Superhuman reappearance of the Nocturnal Vision
of the Desert."
Our account of Azael, at Astley's, may be somewhat too literal for
those of a poetic imagination; but when we say that it is gorgeously got
up, with all the liberality and spirit of an Astley's management, we are
sure we shall send many more to the theatre than we shall deter from
going there, by our very common-place view of an uncommonly mag-
nificent spectacle.
Yes, onward with your stitches,
'Till Beauty gains her own,
NOTES AND QUERIES EOR COMMUNISTS AND RED
REPUBLICANS.
A Correspondent wishes to know how and whence could have origi-
nated so extraordinary a proposition as the dogma that " property is
theft." Erom the circumstance, we should say, that the gentleman
who first propounded it, had no idea of acquiring anything except by
stealing.
Another Correspondent casts a doubt on the correctness of the or-
thography of the word " Rouges," the Erench name for the ultra-
republicans, and by us translated " Reds." He suggests that " Rouges,"
as applied to the party of disorder, is a corruption of an Anglicism, to
be rectified by the transposition of two letters : and inquires whether
it should not be properly spelt " Rogues."
how to treat electors.
It has been suggested, that the voters of St. Albans should be put
up to auction. Certainly • and all of them knocked down.