DOI issue:
July to December, 1852
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16610#0116
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
DOMESTIC BLISS.
Wife {much startled). "Good Gracious, Reginald! What are yotj doing with that Gun?"
Reginald, {who is very fond of Shooting). "Hush! Hush' my dear—I've killed Two!"
Wife. "My goodness! two what?—Thieves?"
Reginald. "No, dear. Two op those confounded Rabbits that are always eating the Verbena! There, go to sleep,
darling—I'll have another directly."
THE NATIONAL TUTOR'S ASSISTANT.
Everybody knows that the great obstacle to popular education is
the agreement of sects, on the one hand, that it is necessary to teach
orthodoxy together with secular knowledge, and their inability, on the
other, to agree what doxy is ortho-. In consequence of this coincident
consent, and difference, it is vulgarly imagined that the children of the
destitute orders are prevented from obtaining any information what- j
ever of a stcular kind. The fact is not so. Many of them are
instructed, and acquire great proficiency in the very secular sciences of
picking pockets, cattle-stealing, burglary, and even, as the county
magistrate will say, of poaching. They are only prevented from
learning those secular things which, in the opinion of thinking persons,
are the, least objec ionable, from secular A B O, reading, writing, and
ari hmetic, upwards, to an altitude so nearly celestial a3 Astronomy.
Such being th« case, could not the rival denominationists compromise
the education question, having an understanding that orthodoxy shall
be taught as soon as it can be determined, and allowing the secular
alphabet, and so on, to be taught simply, pending the investigation, in
the place of, and as lesser evils than, secular larceny and felony?
Educating themselves in the meanwhile, so as to ascertain the meaning
of words, which orthodoxy is a question of, if it is a definable thing.
Want of dialectics is the cause why theological disputes are not settled,
or why it is not seen that they are interminable. So, in point of fact,
the long and short of the matter is this, that popular ignorance is
owing to clerical nescience, and that the people remain uneducated
because contending parsons are dunces. And now for a suggestion, by
way of the first step to the combination of spiritual wi- h temporal
studies. Let the children of the people be taught Watts's hymns,
and the reverend guides of the people Watts's Logic.
Cockney Epitaph for a Cook.—"Teace to his Hashes."
PUNCH PASSES SENTENCE.
There is an animal, with the features of a man—an animal by name
Calvimont, Prefect of the Dordogne; of whom the Daily News
writes :—
" This functionary's latest feat was to set up, on the Jttt of August 15, an immense
transparf ncy before the Hotel de Ville at Perigueux, representing an eagle with the
following inscription, ' God made Napolkon, and then rested.' "
Punch whistles, and so calls to him this profane dog, and says:—
" Calvimont, for your beastly impiety receive this sentence: you have
the soul of a spaniel, and for two hours per diem it shall not be per-
mitted to you to walk erect, but, under penalty of repeated blows, you
shall for two hours per diem for two months crawl on all-fours. You
shall also, for the time, wear a collar, and answer all reasonable calls to
the sound of a dog-whistle."
Coldness of the Weather in Paris.
The weather was extremely cold in Paris during the fetes. In fact,
Louis Napoleon could not help observing how coldly the entire
populace looked as he passed with his cortege through the crowded
streets. This is the more strange, as nothing bad been left undone to
get up a little warmth on the occasion. We are informed that the
Prince President felt this coldness so severely, that he has been heard
to declare that he shall not venture in public again until a very great
change takes place. He has been confined to his room by the cold
ever since.
more cry than WOOL.
So many of the much be-puffed " Gold Companies " have turned out
such thorough swindles, that we think their most appropriate device
would be a representation of the Golden Fleece.
DOMESTIC BLISS.
Wife {much startled). "Good Gracious, Reginald! What are yotj doing with that Gun?"
Reginald, {who is very fond of Shooting). "Hush! Hush' my dear—I've killed Two!"
Wife. "My goodness! two what?—Thieves?"
Reginald. "No, dear. Two op those confounded Rabbits that are always eating the Verbena! There, go to sleep,
darling—I'll have another directly."
THE NATIONAL TUTOR'S ASSISTANT.
Everybody knows that the great obstacle to popular education is
the agreement of sects, on the one hand, that it is necessary to teach
orthodoxy together with secular knowledge, and their inability, on the
other, to agree what doxy is ortho-. In consequence of this coincident
consent, and difference, it is vulgarly imagined that the children of the
destitute orders are prevented from obtaining any information what- j
ever of a stcular kind. The fact is not so. Many of them are
instructed, and acquire great proficiency in the very secular sciences of
picking pockets, cattle-stealing, burglary, and even, as the county
magistrate will say, of poaching. They are only prevented from
learning those secular things which, in the opinion of thinking persons,
are the, least objec ionable, from secular A B O, reading, writing, and
ari hmetic, upwards, to an altitude so nearly celestial a3 Astronomy.
Such being th« case, could not the rival denominationists compromise
the education question, having an understanding that orthodoxy shall
be taught as soon as it can be determined, and allowing the secular
alphabet, and so on, to be taught simply, pending the investigation, in
the place of, and as lesser evils than, secular larceny and felony?
Educating themselves in the meanwhile, so as to ascertain the meaning
of words, which orthodoxy is a question of, if it is a definable thing.
Want of dialectics is the cause why theological disputes are not settled,
or why it is not seen that they are interminable. So, in point of fact,
the long and short of the matter is this, that popular ignorance is
owing to clerical nescience, and that the people remain uneducated
because contending parsons are dunces. And now for a suggestion, by
way of the first step to the combination of spiritual wi- h temporal
studies. Let the children of the people be taught Watts's hymns,
and the reverend guides of the people Watts's Logic.
Cockney Epitaph for a Cook.—"Teace to his Hashes."
PUNCH PASSES SENTENCE.
There is an animal, with the features of a man—an animal by name
Calvimont, Prefect of the Dordogne; of whom the Daily News
writes :—
" This functionary's latest feat was to set up, on the Jttt of August 15, an immense
transparf ncy before the Hotel de Ville at Perigueux, representing an eagle with the
following inscription, ' God made Napolkon, and then rested.' "
Punch whistles, and so calls to him this profane dog, and says:—
" Calvimont, for your beastly impiety receive this sentence: you have
the soul of a spaniel, and for two hours per diem it shall not be per-
mitted to you to walk erect, but, under penalty of repeated blows, you
shall for two hours per diem for two months crawl on all-fours. You
shall also, for the time, wear a collar, and answer all reasonable calls to
the sound of a dog-whistle."
Coldness of the Weather in Paris.
The weather was extremely cold in Paris during the fetes. In fact,
Louis Napoleon could not help observing how coldly the entire
populace looked as he passed with his cortege through the crowded
streets. This is the more strange, as nothing bad been left undone to
get up a little warmth on the occasion. We are informed that the
Prince President felt this coldness so severely, that he has been heard
to declare that he shall not venture in public again until a very great
change takes place. He has been confined to his room by the cold
ever since.
more cry than WOOL.
So many of the much be-puffed " Gold Companies " have turned out
such thorough swindles, that we think their most appropriate device
would be a representation of the Golden Fleece.