DOI issue:
July to December, 1852
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16610#0210
202
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
BILL-STICKERS BEWARE.
NE would think that the
Bill-Stickers were a most
formidable body of men, if
we are to judge by the
number of warnings and
cautions that are being con-
tinually addressed to them.
From the frequency with
which they are called upon
to " Beware " it would ap-
pear that the Bill-Stickers
have a reputation for stick-
ing at nothing, and that it is
necessary to make them the
objects of constant caution.
The last new move that has
<0^^Q^ ^^^^^^W^J been made against them is
to hold them responsible for
the sentiments contained in
the placards they paste up:
— a proceeding that must
lead to much inconsistency,
for everybody knows, ou the authority of the old joke on the subject,
that a Bill-Sticker will stick up for any side that will pay him.
A poor unfortunate has, it is said, been lately held to bail for
posting an anti-militia bill, though, perhaps, the self-same individual
had, within a few minutes, been pasting up a placard inviting "fine
young men" to join the gallant band ; and there is but little doubt that
if he were asked to stick up a broadside, offering a reward for his own
apprehension, he would undertake the job on the shortest notice.
Everybody knows that if a Bill-Sticker were for one moment to become
a party man, his occupation would be gone ; and he accordingly merges
his politics in his paste-pot. To him it is a matter of indifference what
the Government may do : the only Bills in which he feels an interest
being those that require sticking. He cares not to watch the stages
at which a Bill in the House may have arrived, but he is anxious that
every Bill should be printed, in order that he may have an opportunity
of submitting it out of doors to the fair chance of a reading.
"Colonel Sibthorp, who commands the Lincoln Militia, has
contrived to raise a sergeant and three Men."_
United Service Gazette.
Spigotry and Intolerance.
An advertisement has been published with the heading of " Bitter
Beer Controversy." We cannot well conceive a controversy about
beer being a bitter one, unless a part in it has been taken by Philpotts.
Cockney Philosophy—The Socratic mode of argument is the only
true mode of chopping logic, because it proceeds altogether on the
principle of axing questions.
AGRICULTURAL ABSTINENCE.
"Am extraordinary case of abstinence" has lately been astonishing
the weak mind of proverbially "Silly Suffolk." One Elizabeth
Squirrel, it is said, a resident at Shottisham in that county, has been
living upon nothing for the last six months, and is still voluntarily
restricting herself to this economic diet. By some her existence is
esteemed a miracle : but to us the miracle appears to be that a case
like this should have occasioned any wonder in so fruitfully miraculous
a district. " Hundreds of visitors," we are told—
" Of every rank in life, have daily flocked to see her. Committees have been formed
to watch at her bedsfde: and repeated public meetings have been held throughout tha
neighbourhood, for the purpose of debating and examining the case."
As if there were anything new in it! As if this air-plant vegetation
were not a known and common attribute of our agricultural humanity !
Why, total abstinents abound in Suffolk : the whole county is infested
with these starving Squirrels :—Squirrels, namely, in the shape of
our Distressed Agriculturists, who, by their own veracious testimony,
have been living upon nothing for the last six years—in fact, ever since
the introduction of Eree Trade. Eitly, we think, may these be
christened " Squirrels :" for are they not continually (according
to their own account, at least) " up a tree ? "
PUNCH ON TH ft BABY.
abies are such delicate subjects, we scarcely
know how to handle them. Some look
upon a Baby as an unmitigated good, but
we have often met with it in the shape of
a " crying evil." Much, however, depends
on the treatment of the infant, and in this
respect we cannot too much condemn the
bad example set by the providers of public
entertainments, for a baby is seldom intro-
duced upon the stage, except to be stuffed
into a drawer, thrust away under a bed,
sat down upon in a chair, or thrown about
in a pantomime. If all the world were
literally a stage, no baby could survive
the first stage of its existence. A real
Adelphi baby shou'd possess a heart of
bran and a head of wood, the arms of a Dutch doll and the legs of a
Marionette, to be able to bear the treatment to which it is liable.
Happily our business is with the baby of private life, and not with the
baby of the foot-lights, so that we are not doomed to the agony of
tracing its heartrending career, from the hands of its unnatural father
—the property man—to the hampers, the holes and corners, the parcels,
and even the pockets, into which it is kicked and crammed in the
course of its brief existence.
A new-born baby exhibits to the eye of a casual observer during the
first few weeks of its existeace nothing but a series of grimaces,
which, though usually the result of wind, are supposed to arise from
intelligence. When a baby has a tendency to nocturnal roaring, the
mother usually proposes a mild cathartic, but the father is apt to
propose a more decided regimen by committing it to the nursery.
Some infants scream at the sight of a strange face, a mode of proceed-
ing which is usually attributed to sagacity on the part of the " little
dear," but it really arises from that cacoethss lacrymandi which is so
prevalent among the infant community.
When the child is teething, it is difficult to say what should be the
mode of treatment, but speaking as a father—not as a mother—we are
inclined to think that the only course to take while the infant cuts its
teeth, is for the time to cut the infant.
Among the diseases to which children are liable we must instance
spasms, which, however, are often an imaginary complaint, put forward
by the nurse as a plea for the necessity of having some spirits always at
hand, and "from hand to mouth" is continually exemplified by the class
alluded to.
As the complaints of the baby are not a pleasant theme, we shall pass
over the catalogue commencing alphabetically in Croup and ending in
Snuffles—a malady whose effects it is more easy to understand than to
appreciate.
An Austrian Heaven.
An Austrian, upon being asked for a definition of Paradise, said, " I
believe it to be a kingdom where you can travel backwards and
forwards without a passport."
What Ministers wish to do. —To measure Eree Trade corn with
a Protectionist bushel.
The Height oe Simplicity.—Buying a Bradshaw in the hope of
ascertaining wnen your train will start.
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
BILL-STICKERS BEWARE.
NE would think that the
Bill-Stickers were a most
formidable body of men, if
we are to judge by the
number of warnings and
cautions that are being con-
tinually addressed to them.
From the frequency with
which they are called upon
to " Beware " it would ap-
pear that the Bill-Stickers
have a reputation for stick-
ing at nothing, and that it is
necessary to make them the
objects of constant caution.
The last new move that has
<0^^Q^ ^^^^^^W^J been made against them is
to hold them responsible for
the sentiments contained in
the placards they paste up:
— a proceeding that must
lead to much inconsistency,
for everybody knows, ou the authority of the old joke on the subject,
that a Bill-Sticker will stick up for any side that will pay him.
A poor unfortunate has, it is said, been lately held to bail for
posting an anti-militia bill, though, perhaps, the self-same individual
had, within a few minutes, been pasting up a placard inviting "fine
young men" to join the gallant band ; and there is but little doubt that
if he were asked to stick up a broadside, offering a reward for his own
apprehension, he would undertake the job on the shortest notice.
Everybody knows that if a Bill-Sticker were for one moment to become
a party man, his occupation would be gone ; and he accordingly merges
his politics in his paste-pot. To him it is a matter of indifference what
the Government may do : the only Bills in which he feels an interest
being those that require sticking. He cares not to watch the stages
at which a Bill in the House may have arrived, but he is anxious that
every Bill should be printed, in order that he may have an opportunity
of submitting it out of doors to the fair chance of a reading.
"Colonel Sibthorp, who commands the Lincoln Militia, has
contrived to raise a sergeant and three Men."_
United Service Gazette.
Spigotry and Intolerance.
An advertisement has been published with the heading of " Bitter
Beer Controversy." We cannot well conceive a controversy about
beer being a bitter one, unless a part in it has been taken by Philpotts.
Cockney Philosophy—The Socratic mode of argument is the only
true mode of chopping logic, because it proceeds altogether on the
principle of axing questions.
AGRICULTURAL ABSTINENCE.
"Am extraordinary case of abstinence" has lately been astonishing
the weak mind of proverbially "Silly Suffolk." One Elizabeth
Squirrel, it is said, a resident at Shottisham in that county, has been
living upon nothing for the last six months, and is still voluntarily
restricting herself to this economic diet. By some her existence is
esteemed a miracle : but to us the miracle appears to be that a case
like this should have occasioned any wonder in so fruitfully miraculous
a district. " Hundreds of visitors," we are told—
" Of every rank in life, have daily flocked to see her. Committees have been formed
to watch at her bedsfde: and repeated public meetings have been held throughout tha
neighbourhood, for the purpose of debating and examining the case."
As if there were anything new in it! As if this air-plant vegetation
were not a known and common attribute of our agricultural humanity !
Why, total abstinents abound in Suffolk : the whole county is infested
with these starving Squirrels :—Squirrels, namely, in the shape of
our Distressed Agriculturists, who, by their own veracious testimony,
have been living upon nothing for the last six years—in fact, ever since
the introduction of Eree Trade. Eitly, we think, may these be
christened " Squirrels :" for are they not continually (according
to their own account, at least) " up a tree ? "
PUNCH ON TH ft BABY.
abies are such delicate subjects, we scarcely
know how to handle them. Some look
upon a Baby as an unmitigated good, but
we have often met with it in the shape of
a " crying evil." Much, however, depends
on the treatment of the infant, and in this
respect we cannot too much condemn the
bad example set by the providers of public
entertainments, for a baby is seldom intro-
duced upon the stage, except to be stuffed
into a drawer, thrust away under a bed,
sat down upon in a chair, or thrown about
in a pantomime. If all the world were
literally a stage, no baby could survive
the first stage of its existence. A real
Adelphi baby shou'd possess a heart of
bran and a head of wood, the arms of a Dutch doll and the legs of a
Marionette, to be able to bear the treatment to which it is liable.
Happily our business is with the baby of private life, and not with the
baby of the foot-lights, so that we are not doomed to the agony of
tracing its heartrending career, from the hands of its unnatural father
—the property man—to the hampers, the holes and corners, the parcels,
and even the pockets, into which it is kicked and crammed in the
course of its brief existence.
A new-born baby exhibits to the eye of a casual observer during the
first few weeks of its existeace nothing but a series of grimaces,
which, though usually the result of wind, are supposed to arise from
intelligence. When a baby has a tendency to nocturnal roaring, the
mother usually proposes a mild cathartic, but the father is apt to
propose a more decided regimen by committing it to the nursery.
Some infants scream at the sight of a strange face, a mode of proceed-
ing which is usually attributed to sagacity on the part of the " little
dear," but it really arises from that cacoethss lacrymandi which is so
prevalent among the infant community.
When the child is teething, it is difficult to say what should be the
mode of treatment, but speaking as a father—not as a mother—we are
inclined to think that the only course to take while the infant cuts its
teeth, is for the time to cut the infant.
Among the diseases to which children are liable we must instance
spasms, which, however, are often an imaginary complaint, put forward
by the nurse as a plea for the necessity of having some spirits always at
hand, and "from hand to mouth" is continually exemplified by the class
alluded to.
As the complaints of the baby are not a pleasant theme, we shall pass
over the catalogue commencing alphabetically in Croup and ending in
Snuffles—a malady whose effects it is more easy to understand than to
appreciate.
An Austrian Heaven.
An Austrian, upon being asked for a definition of Paradise, said, " I
believe it to be a kingdom where you can travel backwards and
forwards without a passport."
What Ministers wish to do. —To measure Eree Trade corn with
a Protectionist bushel.
The Height oe Simplicity.—Buying a Bradshaw in the hope of
ascertaining wnen your train will start.