DOI issue:
April 26, 1856
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16617#0176
168 PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. [April 26, 1856.
THE WEDDING-RING QUESTION.
HERE has been a meeting of
women at Leicester. About
ALEXANDER TO HIS PEOPLE.
of the blanket. As the law at
present rules, the wife—it was
thought—is a little too much
the property of the husband.
He may leave her to labour
in desolate singleness ; and
then, even as a bear rifles the
wild bees of their honey, come
back, aad, with his ugly paws,
rob and despoil his helpmate.
Further, the women, taking
into consideration the domestic
effect of the prison cat at the
future hearth, resolved not to support Mb. Dillwyn's measure of reform; such being a
measure of hangman's whipcord, to be applied to husbands addicted to beat and bruise their
wives. These thoughtful, philosophic women, denounced the peculiar cat-of-nine-tails; the
very thought of it would disturb the peace of the domestic kitten. We think this resolution
was as worthy of their womanly wisdom as of their womanly tenderness. Nevertheless,
the savage Adam, the brutal husband whose acquaintance would be spurned by a decent
baboon, must somehow feel, that in breaking and bruising his wife's flesh, he has caused
the mortification of his own. Now, Captain Maconochie, in his Prison Discipline new
from the press, suggests a cure for the wife-beaters, worthy cf respectful thought. The
wife-beater, having made his mark or marks upon the wife of his bosom, should, by means
of marks, work his own redemption from imprisoument and hard labour. In nineteen cases
out of twenty the wife-beater is a drunkard. Well, he is committed to gaoi and, under
the Maconochie system, he is set so much task-work, which is rated at so many marks,
each mark scoring off a portion of his sentence. But hear the Captain :—
"It has often occurred to him (the writer of Prison Discipline) that the Mark system in its perfection would pecu-
liarly apply to wife-beaters, habitual drunkards, and such other noxious small fry, whose crimes against the
State would scarcely warrant the imposition of a long time-sentence, yet who are little affected,^ and never
eared, by a short one, their families almost alone suffering, either by their incarceration or discharge."
But, as the means of redemption, Captain Maconochie would essay the power of tempta-
tion. The drunkard, if it so pleased him, should still have his dram; a dram to be bought
at a very high price with marks; with every mark his certainty of freedom lessening
ard becoming more remote.
" Were they committed under heavy Mark sentences, with access to liquor for liberty, but for nothing
else, either they would never come out, but remain tor life where alone they can be kept out. of mischief, or, if
at length discharged, it would be only after such a course of voluntary abstinence as, combined with reluctance to
incur another such penalty, would probably cure them for life of their infirmity.''
Let the cat be set aside for awhile, and let the bottle have a trial: we have little doubt
that gin would in effect be found a sharper master than whipcord. The wife-beater would have'
a dram to console him, a dram that is, in fact, a bitter sup of further captivity. Well, he
tosses off the liquor, and pays for it a swingeing price in ready marks : now, these marks being
the coin wherewith he should buy his freedom at the prison-door, liberty is all the further off
with every gin-drop swallowed. If he would be free to return to his wife, he must, he
cannot help it, return a sober, industrious, se^denying man. With the bottle before him, and
the possession of Marks to purchase it, he must put the demon drink aside, and devote his
better nature to the domestic gods.
Surely, the Maconochie discipline is worth a trial. The worthy women of Leicester
will not have even the woman-beater flogged. And, with the Captain's system carried
out, who can doubt but that the influence of self-denial would work a more enduring change
upon the " wife-beaters, habitual drunkards, and other such noxious small fry," than any
intimacy, however close, with the prison cat ?
After a war as just as glorious,
My Russians, here we are, victorious,
two hundred wives and ma- j A war our Sire did not commence,
trons assembled to consider Religion being his pretence,
the present conditions of mar- J TT , , ,
riage ; in fact, to resolve the i ^e dreamt not that expostulation
great wedding-ring Question. ! ^"ul\kinfile such a conflagration,
After a debate, from which! When he those provinces did seize,
the House of Commons might To form material guarantees,
have learned point and brevity, j He show,d the strongest wish for
a petition to Parliament was ^ p to the time of hi* decease
agreed to;. the petition praying But with the mildegt dlsposit^on
that married women might at Could not to th C(mditions;
least have their fair halt of
the apple ; at least, the moiety j Hostilities did then continue
Dunup on Debt.
" It must be confessed that my creditors are singularly unfortunate. They invariably apply
the day after I have spent all my money. I always say to them, 'Now, this is very pro-
voking. Why didn't you come yesterday, and I could have paid you in full P' But no, they
never will. They seem to take a perverse pleasure in arriving always too late. It's my belief
the rascals do it on purpose."
_ Life in the Haymarket !—A Policeman on night duty sends us the following observa-
tion : " It seems to me that with many young men, the most approved method of winding
up the night is reeling it home!"
We knew you'd show what stuff was in you.
You justified our expectations,
And single-handed beat three nations.
The Baltic, the Pacific Ocean,
The Black Sea witnessed your devotion,
And famous deeds, both new and striking.
None of you served against their liking.
Both from Siberia and the Sea
Named White, you drove the Enemy,
Erom Sweaborg made them fast retire,
Not having set the place on fire.
Then of Sebastopol the South,
Eleven months beneath the mouth
Of cannon, bravely you defended,
'Twas not its fall the war that ended.
In Asia too, like sons of Mars,
You conquer'd the stronghold of Kars,
The Turks did not to famine yield,
They having thrash'd you in the field.
Howe'er, a providential fact,
.Not this, that you are soundly whack'd,
A fact fulfilling our desire,
Permits us nicely to retire.
The Christians' rights are guaranteed,
Now, by the Sultan's act and deed;
The cause, for which your blood you've spent,
Is won : so we may rest content.
Of peace to hasten the conclusion,
And. quite dispel the wild illusion
That by ambition we are swayed,
A few concessions we have made;
In the Black Sea a slight provision
With Turkish ships to bar collision:
And near the Danube some mutation
In Bessarabia's demarcation.
By these small changes nought is lost,
Compared with a prolong'd war's cost,
And what the land, o'er which I reign,
By peace and quietness will gain.
Sing hey ! then, for the reformation
Of holy Russia's mighty nation,
Let us develope her resources,
In future, by pacific courses.
*
Come on, and Strike !
Several inquiries have been made after the
Clock for the New Houses of Parliament, which
we are told has been "going for some time."
We confess we are not satisfied with this in-
formation, for any Clock can be made to " go "
after a certain fashion, but our objection to the
Parliament Clock is that it don't come.
York: in Danger !—The Marquis op Cian-
sicarde has constituted himself a " trustee "
for the immoveabiltty of the York Pillar ! His
Royal Highness had better look about him.
THE WEDDING-RING QUESTION.
HERE has been a meeting of
women at Leicester. About
ALEXANDER TO HIS PEOPLE.
of the blanket. As the law at
present rules, the wife—it was
thought—is a little too much
the property of the husband.
He may leave her to labour
in desolate singleness ; and
then, even as a bear rifles the
wild bees of their honey, come
back, aad, with his ugly paws,
rob and despoil his helpmate.
Further, the women, taking
into consideration the domestic
effect of the prison cat at the
future hearth, resolved not to support Mb. Dillwyn's measure of reform; such being a
measure of hangman's whipcord, to be applied to husbands addicted to beat and bruise their
wives. These thoughtful, philosophic women, denounced the peculiar cat-of-nine-tails; the
very thought of it would disturb the peace of the domestic kitten. We think this resolution
was as worthy of their womanly wisdom as of their womanly tenderness. Nevertheless,
the savage Adam, the brutal husband whose acquaintance would be spurned by a decent
baboon, must somehow feel, that in breaking and bruising his wife's flesh, he has caused
the mortification of his own. Now, Captain Maconochie, in his Prison Discipline new
from the press, suggests a cure for the wife-beaters, worthy cf respectful thought. The
wife-beater, having made his mark or marks upon the wife of his bosom, should, by means
of marks, work his own redemption from imprisoument and hard labour. In nineteen cases
out of twenty the wife-beater is a drunkard. Well, he is committed to gaoi and, under
the Maconochie system, he is set so much task-work, which is rated at so many marks,
each mark scoring off a portion of his sentence. But hear the Captain :—
"It has often occurred to him (the writer of Prison Discipline) that the Mark system in its perfection would pecu-
liarly apply to wife-beaters, habitual drunkards, and such other noxious small fry, whose crimes against the
State would scarcely warrant the imposition of a long time-sentence, yet who are little affected,^ and never
eared, by a short one, their families almost alone suffering, either by their incarceration or discharge."
But, as the means of redemption, Captain Maconochie would essay the power of tempta-
tion. The drunkard, if it so pleased him, should still have his dram; a dram to be bought
at a very high price with marks; with every mark his certainty of freedom lessening
ard becoming more remote.
" Were they committed under heavy Mark sentences, with access to liquor for liberty, but for nothing
else, either they would never come out, but remain tor life where alone they can be kept out. of mischief, or, if
at length discharged, it would be only after such a course of voluntary abstinence as, combined with reluctance to
incur another such penalty, would probably cure them for life of their infirmity.''
Let the cat be set aside for awhile, and let the bottle have a trial: we have little doubt
that gin would in effect be found a sharper master than whipcord. The wife-beater would have'
a dram to console him, a dram that is, in fact, a bitter sup of further captivity. Well, he
tosses off the liquor, and pays for it a swingeing price in ready marks : now, these marks being
the coin wherewith he should buy his freedom at the prison-door, liberty is all the further off
with every gin-drop swallowed. If he would be free to return to his wife, he must, he
cannot help it, return a sober, industrious, se^denying man. With the bottle before him, and
the possession of Marks to purchase it, he must put the demon drink aside, and devote his
better nature to the domestic gods.
Surely, the Maconochie discipline is worth a trial. The worthy women of Leicester
will not have even the woman-beater flogged. And, with the Captain's system carried
out, who can doubt but that the influence of self-denial would work a more enduring change
upon the " wife-beaters, habitual drunkards, and other such noxious small fry," than any
intimacy, however close, with the prison cat ?
After a war as just as glorious,
My Russians, here we are, victorious,
two hundred wives and ma- j A war our Sire did not commence,
trons assembled to consider Religion being his pretence,
the present conditions of mar- J TT , , ,
riage ; in fact, to resolve the i ^e dreamt not that expostulation
great wedding-ring Question. ! ^"ul\kinfile such a conflagration,
After a debate, from which! When he those provinces did seize,
the House of Commons might To form material guarantees,
have learned point and brevity, j He show,d the strongest wish for
a petition to Parliament was ^ p to the time of hi* decease
agreed to;. the petition praying But with the mildegt dlsposit^on
that married women might at Could not to th C(mditions;
least have their fair halt of
the apple ; at least, the moiety j Hostilities did then continue
Dunup on Debt.
" It must be confessed that my creditors are singularly unfortunate. They invariably apply
the day after I have spent all my money. I always say to them, 'Now, this is very pro-
voking. Why didn't you come yesterday, and I could have paid you in full P' But no, they
never will. They seem to take a perverse pleasure in arriving always too late. It's my belief
the rascals do it on purpose."
_ Life in the Haymarket !—A Policeman on night duty sends us the following observa-
tion : " It seems to me that with many young men, the most approved method of winding
up the night is reeling it home!"
We knew you'd show what stuff was in you.
You justified our expectations,
And single-handed beat three nations.
The Baltic, the Pacific Ocean,
The Black Sea witnessed your devotion,
And famous deeds, both new and striking.
None of you served against their liking.
Both from Siberia and the Sea
Named White, you drove the Enemy,
Erom Sweaborg made them fast retire,
Not having set the place on fire.
Then of Sebastopol the South,
Eleven months beneath the mouth
Of cannon, bravely you defended,
'Twas not its fall the war that ended.
In Asia too, like sons of Mars,
You conquer'd the stronghold of Kars,
The Turks did not to famine yield,
They having thrash'd you in the field.
Howe'er, a providential fact,
.Not this, that you are soundly whack'd,
A fact fulfilling our desire,
Permits us nicely to retire.
The Christians' rights are guaranteed,
Now, by the Sultan's act and deed;
The cause, for which your blood you've spent,
Is won : so we may rest content.
Of peace to hasten the conclusion,
And. quite dispel the wild illusion
That by ambition we are swayed,
A few concessions we have made;
In the Black Sea a slight provision
With Turkish ships to bar collision:
And near the Danube some mutation
In Bessarabia's demarcation.
By these small changes nought is lost,
Compared with a prolong'd war's cost,
And what the land, o'er which I reign,
By peace and quietness will gain.
Sing hey ! then, for the reformation
Of holy Russia's mighty nation,
Let us develope her resources,
In future, by pacific courses.
*
Come on, and Strike !
Several inquiries have been made after the
Clock for the New Houses of Parliament, which
we are told has been "going for some time."
We confess we are not satisfied with this in-
formation, for any Clock can be made to " go "
after a certain fashion, but our objection to the
Parliament Clock is that it don't come.
York: in Danger !—The Marquis op Cian-
sicarde has constituted himself a " trustee "
for the immoveabiltty of the York Pillar ! His
Royal Highness had better look about him.