DOI issue:
August 12, 1865
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16876#0068
53 PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. [August 12, 1865.
A COMPLAINT.
Wiggles thinks hb’ll change his Club. He joined the “Reynolds” because he liked the Society of Artists; but, confound it!
It’s bather bard a fellow can t take a wink of sleep after dinner, without being Potted into a Score of Sketch-books.
MILLINERY AND MARRIAGE.
My Dear Mrs. Smith,
We conversed the other evening, when we met at Lady Clap-
pertongue’s (it is as well to let folks know what genteel company one
keeps), upon the sadly selfish lives which all unmarried men must lead,
and the cruel heartless callousness wherewith they mostly view attempts
to make them change their state. Tou told me of your efforts to unite
a wretched bachelor to some fair young friend of yours, and how their
only end had been to drive him frightened from your house: and I
endeavoured to console you by remarking that such cases were by no
means now infrequent, and afforded mournful proof of the depravity of
man. I then proceeded to point out that the reluctance which so many
young men feel to “ getting spliced ” (as they irreverently term it)
arises mairiiy from a notion that a wife is a dear creature, iu a sumptuary
sense. And just as I was showing how extravagance in dress may
foster this delusion, and how prone young girls are now-a-days to be
costly in costume, my argument was cut snort by a carving-knife which
some fiend popped into my hand, with the request that I should sever
a leg and liver wing. _ Conversation of course ceases when one has to
cut up fowls, and, being silenced then by my study of anatomy, I must
ask you now to read the following brief paragraph, which affords a
oroof of what I was proceeding to affirm :—
“ A Warning to Ladies.—The Publicity of Marseilles announces a new kind of
strike—that of bachelors. Not fewer than 6,000 young- men, it states, of that place,
between the age of 20 and 30, held a meeting in the open air a little way out of the
town, and entered into an agreement not to ask any young woman in marriage until
a complete change shall have been operated in the manner of living, and particularly
in the dress, of the fairer sex. The young men insist on greater simplicity in every
respect, and a return to the more modest habits of a century or two ago.”
There now, my dear Madam. What do you say to that? Surely
you will grant that there are fair grounds for my argument that the
milliners are one cause of the rarity of marriages. A girl with an ex-
tensive wardrobe wants a house and furniture and company to match;
and as young men mostly cannot afford these luxuries, they prefer
remaining single to getting into debt. As to the “ more modest habits
of a century or two ago,” I doubt if reference be here intended to
customs or costumes. It would be shocking to suppose that, even in
Marseilles, young ladies are less modest in these enlightened days,
than they were iu the dark ages, before Crinoline came in. But if by
“ modesty ” in raiment simplicity be meant, clearly modesty is not now
the aim of the modistes.
Depend on it, dear Madam, if mothers would but make their daughters
dress more simply, and would encourage them to be more homely
in their habits, they would soon find young men willing to take them
off their hands. Many ladies now seem to live only to be looked at,
and to matters of the toilette give up more than half their time. Now,
a pretty face aud figure are both pleasant to inspect; but a man who
wants a wife wauts a helpmate and companion, and not merely an orna-
ment to decorate his house. If girls thought as much of cookery as
they do of their coiffure, and were more instructed iu the dressing of a
dinner, and devoted less attention to the dressing of themselves, the
Registrar would soon record a marked increase of marriages, and hearts
would supersede the suit of diamonds or clubs.
Believe me, my dear Madam, with a chivalrous devotion to all your
charming sex, even those in Crinoline not being excepted,
ilMS.
Colonial Carefulness.
Punch’s eyes are at once on both hemispheres, although he need
hardly remark that he does not squint. He reads a journal of the West
called the St. Christopher Gazette and ChanibLean Courier. In the last
number he finds that St. Christopher had just received certain good j
news, and that it was thus promulgated:—
“ Her Royal Highness the Princess of Wales gave birth to an infant Prince
(a boy) on the 3rd of June.”
Quite right, St. Kitts. The Prince es a boy. Princes often are
boys, until they grow up, and then they are men. Nothing like
accuracy.
A COMPLAINT.
Wiggles thinks hb’ll change his Club. He joined the “Reynolds” because he liked the Society of Artists; but, confound it!
It’s bather bard a fellow can t take a wink of sleep after dinner, without being Potted into a Score of Sketch-books.
MILLINERY AND MARRIAGE.
My Dear Mrs. Smith,
We conversed the other evening, when we met at Lady Clap-
pertongue’s (it is as well to let folks know what genteel company one
keeps), upon the sadly selfish lives which all unmarried men must lead,
and the cruel heartless callousness wherewith they mostly view attempts
to make them change their state. Tou told me of your efforts to unite
a wretched bachelor to some fair young friend of yours, and how their
only end had been to drive him frightened from your house: and I
endeavoured to console you by remarking that such cases were by no
means now infrequent, and afforded mournful proof of the depravity of
man. I then proceeded to point out that the reluctance which so many
young men feel to “ getting spliced ” (as they irreverently term it)
arises mairiiy from a notion that a wife is a dear creature, iu a sumptuary
sense. And just as I was showing how extravagance in dress may
foster this delusion, and how prone young girls are now-a-days to be
costly in costume, my argument was cut snort by a carving-knife which
some fiend popped into my hand, with the request that I should sever
a leg and liver wing. _ Conversation of course ceases when one has to
cut up fowls, and, being silenced then by my study of anatomy, I must
ask you now to read the following brief paragraph, which affords a
oroof of what I was proceeding to affirm :—
“ A Warning to Ladies.—The Publicity of Marseilles announces a new kind of
strike—that of bachelors. Not fewer than 6,000 young- men, it states, of that place,
between the age of 20 and 30, held a meeting in the open air a little way out of the
town, and entered into an agreement not to ask any young woman in marriage until
a complete change shall have been operated in the manner of living, and particularly
in the dress, of the fairer sex. The young men insist on greater simplicity in every
respect, and a return to the more modest habits of a century or two ago.”
There now, my dear Madam. What do you say to that? Surely
you will grant that there are fair grounds for my argument that the
milliners are one cause of the rarity of marriages. A girl with an ex-
tensive wardrobe wants a house and furniture and company to match;
and as young men mostly cannot afford these luxuries, they prefer
remaining single to getting into debt. As to the “ more modest habits
of a century or two ago,” I doubt if reference be here intended to
customs or costumes. It would be shocking to suppose that, even in
Marseilles, young ladies are less modest in these enlightened days,
than they were iu the dark ages, before Crinoline came in. But if by
“ modesty ” in raiment simplicity be meant, clearly modesty is not now
the aim of the modistes.
Depend on it, dear Madam, if mothers would but make their daughters
dress more simply, and would encourage them to be more homely
in their habits, they would soon find young men willing to take them
off their hands. Many ladies now seem to live only to be looked at,
and to matters of the toilette give up more than half their time. Now,
a pretty face aud figure are both pleasant to inspect; but a man who
wants a wife wauts a helpmate and companion, and not merely an orna-
ment to decorate his house. If girls thought as much of cookery as
they do of their coiffure, and were more instructed iu the dressing of a
dinner, and devoted less attention to the dressing of themselves, the
Registrar would soon record a marked increase of marriages, and hearts
would supersede the suit of diamonds or clubs.
Believe me, my dear Madam, with a chivalrous devotion to all your
charming sex, even those in Crinoline not being excepted,
ilMS.
Colonial Carefulness.
Punch’s eyes are at once on both hemispheres, although he need
hardly remark that he does not squint. He reads a journal of the West
called the St. Christopher Gazette and ChanibLean Courier. In the last
number he finds that St. Christopher had just received certain good j
news, and that it was thus promulgated:—
“ Her Royal Highness the Princess of Wales gave birth to an infant Prince
(a boy) on the 3rd of June.”
Quite right, St. Kitts. The Prince es a boy. Princes often are
boys, until they grow up, and then they are men. Nothing like
accuracy.