DOI Page / Citation link:
https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16879#0277
Note: This is an additional scan to display the colour reference chart and scalebar.
0.5
1 cm
March 2, 1867.]
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
91
r<r"/
i;
HAPPY THOUGHTS.
(Birthday Party at Byng’s. Festivities.)
Bell sounds for dressing.
There are, I subsequently
discover, bells to prepare us
for every meal, and a goug
when the meal is ready.
The first bell sounding one
hour before dinner merely
indicates that another bell
is coming in half-an-hour’s
time, which, when it sounds,
means that there’s one
more bell to inform the
household that time’s up,
and then the boom of the
gong puts all farther
chances out of the question,
finishing the preparatory
process with the decision
of an auctioneer’s hammer
knocking down “ gone ! ”
In Johnny Byng’s house
everything is done with
military precision. The
Ladies say to one another,
“ Well, I suppose we must go up now,” for everyone makes a point
of either not knowing which bell it is—uncertainty on this subject
being an invariable excuse for lateness at dinner or luncheon—and I
take Johnny Byng aside, and explain to him that as I thought there
were no ladies there, I had brought no dress-clothes. He says, “ it
doesn’t matter, p’raps I can rig you out for to-night, and to-morrow
you can send up to to-wn.”
The rigging out results in a black velveteen shooting-coat and waist-
coat to match. With a black-tie I feel almost in full dress. I always
find somebody else’s clothes suit me better than my own. Byng has
a pair of patent leather boots by him that no one else can wear. The
very things for me: more comfortable than any I’ve ever had made
for my self. __ _
Happy Thought.-= s.”
He laughs and dot — ien
ISn. Gon- = = 5*
fc> * —
Happy Thought i~
to begin.” Say it — w
wards that the lac— t-
Drawing-room. =:
7m
mg
;er-
— o
loudly and authc
specially in the
Chapter on Super].
his own tail toldl
go without one !!
Miss Fridolii
wishing that tin
fasting, humiliati;
Happy Thought
it would have coi
it vulgar.
Byng, who is i
[I don’t catch hf
Happy Though
visiting cards ?
Being introdu
engaged for the
and she says thal
=— cti
i. -C
!» O
CO
— N
=: co
—
" — 10
— ■St
— CO
o
>
0
5
oa
CD
o
JJ I i\ Lr W UVJlO-1 -
tries to explain -
CM
o
CQ
= E
CQ
CD
CO
CD
CM
CD
Happy Thought.—I say to him jestingly, “If Dick’s uncle was Tom’s
sou, what relation was,” and so forth. He is annoyed. (Quei-y vulgar?)
Dinner.— As I pass Byng, he whispers hurriedly, alluding to my
partner, “ She’s been to Nova Scotia. Draw her out.” After twice
placing a leg of my chair on my partner’s dress, and once on that of the
lady on my left, we wedge ourselves in. I begin to laugh about these
little difficulties, and seeing Miss Pellingle look serious, I find I
have been jocose while Byng (behind a lot of flowers where I couldn’t
see him) was saying grace.
Happy Thought.—Exert myself as a conversationalist, and try to
draw her out about Nova Scotia. Begin with “ So you’ve been to Nova
Scotia?” She replies, “ Yes, she has.” I feel-inclined to ask, “ Well,
and how are they ? ” which I know would be stupid. (Query vulgar ?)
I should like to commence instructing her about Nova Scotia. I
wish Byng had told me before dressing for dinner: he’s got a good
library here.
Happy Thought.—Draw her out in a general way by asking, “ and
what sort of a place is Nova Scotia ? ” This I put rather frowningly,
as if I’d received contradictory accounts about it which had deterred
me from going there.
She answers, “ Which part ? ”
Happy Thought.—To shrug my shoulders and reply, “ Oh, any part,”
leaving it to her. She begins something about Halifax, (Halifax 1
remember of course, and a song commencing, “A Captain bold in
Halifax don’t mention it, might be vulgar) when we hear a noise as
of a band tuning outside the window. Byng explains that, being his
birthday, the band from Dishling (Byng’s village)--
“ A?id ” puts in the Butler, with the air of a man who knows what
good music is, “ the band from Bogley
-y in
1 by
well
hink
!gle.
with
he is
gain,
mces
n the
/ with
" nan I
• ns of
ed to
their
i with
ch he
the bands from Dishling
Byng adopts the Butler’s amendment,
and Bogley come to play during dinner.”
Milburd makes a wry face. The united musicians commence (in
the dark outside) an overture. We listen. Byng’s half-aunt pretends
to be interested, and asks, after a few bars, “ Dear me, what’s that
out of? ”
I think. We all think.
Except Milburd, who exclaims, “Out of? Why out of tune, I
should say.” All laugh. Milburd, I suppose, is one of those wags
who “ set the table in a roar.” Pooh! Vulgar.
Miss Pellingle turns to me and observes, “ that was very funny,
wasn’t it ? ”
Happy Thought.-
The bands from
William Tell.
-To reply deprecatingly, ‘
Bogley and Dishling get
yes : funny, but old.”
the overture to
through
Happy Thought (which has probably occurred D the leader of the united
Dishling and Bogley Ba?ids).—When there’s a difficulty beat the drum.
Another Happy Thought [which, probably, has also occurred to the
leader).—Ophicleide covers a multitude of sins.
Byng goes out to address them. He likes playing, as it were, the
“ Ould Squire among his Happy Tenantry,” or “ The Rightful Lord
of the Manor welcomed Home.” The manor consists of a lawn in
front, a garden at the back, and a yard with the dog in it. The united
bands being treated to two bottles of wine, offer to play for the rest of
the night. Offer declined. Milburd says, “ there wouldn’t be much
rest of the night, if they did.” Table in a roar again. I smile : or they’d
think me envious.
Happy Thought.—~Eunny, but not new.
Ladies retire. Fridoline passing me observes, “ You seemed very
much interested in Nova Scotia.”
She has gone before I can reply. Is it possible that * * Is she
* * * I wonder * * because * * * if I only thought that she * * *
I should like to know if she meant * * * or was it merely
and yet * * *
Happy Thought.—I will.
* * * *
REMISSNESS REPRIMANDED.
It is right that naval officers should know that it is their duty to
keep a sharp look-out. This they will understand from study of the
following paragraph of news
“ Court-Martial on Mr. E. Swain.—Plymouth, Wednesday. A Court-Martial
was held to-day at Devonport on Mr. Edmund Swain, the Master in charge of her
Majesty’s ship, Dryad, when she was stranded iu Whitesand Bay on the 13th inst.
The evidence proved that at the time of the accident the weather was very foggy,
and the Dryad’s compass was I05 points wrong through local attraction, caused by
the vessel’s iron beams. The prisoner was severely reprimanded, and admonished
to be more careful for the future.”
No doubt lie will. Lest a worse thing than a reprimand befall him,
he will take all the care he can, whenever he is at sea, to prevent the
weather from being foggy, and to hinder the iron beams of the vessel
that he is in charge of from attracting the compass.
Bad News eor Puppies.—Dog-Tax reduced—no exemptions.
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
91
r<r"/
i;
HAPPY THOUGHTS.
(Birthday Party at Byng’s. Festivities.)
Bell sounds for dressing.
There are, I subsequently
discover, bells to prepare us
for every meal, and a goug
when the meal is ready.
The first bell sounding one
hour before dinner merely
indicates that another bell
is coming in half-an-hour’s
time, which, when it sounds,
means that there’s one
more bell to inform the
household that time’s up,
and then the boom of the
gong puts all farther
chances out of the question,
finishing the preparatory
process with the decision
of an auctioneer’s hammer
knocking down “ gone ! ”
In Johnny Byng’s house
everything is done with
military precision. The
Ladies say to one another,
“ Well, I suppose we must go up now,” for everyone makes a point
of either not knowing which bell it is—uncertainty on this subject
being an invariable excuse for lateness at dinner or luncheon—and I
take Johnny Byng aside, and explain to him that as I thought there
were no ladies there, I had brought no dress-clothes. He says, “ it
doesn’t matter, p’raps I can rig you out for to-night, and to-morrow
you can send up to to-wn.”
The rigging out results in a black velveteen shooting-coat and waist-
coat to match. With a black-tie I feel almost in full dress. I always
find somebody else’s clothes suit me better than my own. Byng has
a pair of patent leather boots by him that no one else can wear. The
very things for me: more comfortable than any I’ve ever had made
for my self. __ _
Happy Thought.-= s.”
He laughs and dot — ien
ISn. Gon- = = 5*
fc> * —
Happy Thought i~
to begin.” Say it — w
wards that the lac— t-
Drawing-room. =:
7m
mg
;er-
— o
loudly and authc
specially in the
Chapter on Super].
his own tail toldl
go without one !!
Miss Fridolii
wishing that tin
fasting, humiliati;
Happy Thought
it would have coi
it vulgar.
Byng, who is i
[I don’t catch hf
Happy Though
visiting cards ?
Being introdu
engaged for the
and she says thal
=— cti
i. -C
!» O
CO
— N
=: co
—
" — 10
— ■St
— CO
o
>
0
5
oa
CD
o
JJ I i\ Lr W UVJlO-1 -
tries to explain -
CM
o
CQ
= E
CQ
CD
CO
CD
CM
CD
Happy Thought.—I say to him jestingly, “If Dick’s uncle was Tom’s
sou, what relation was,” and so forth. He is annoyed. (Quei-y vulgar?)
Dinner.— As I pass Byng, he whispers hurriedly, alluding to my
partner, “ She’s been to Nova Scotia. Draw her out.” After twice
placing a leg of my chair on my partner’s dress, and once on that of the
lady on my left, we wedge ourselves in. I begin to laugh about these
little difficulties, and seeing Miss Pellingle look serious, I find I
have been jocose while Byng (behind a lot of flowers where I couldn’t
see him) was saying grace.
Happy Thought.—Exert myself as a conversationalist, and try to
draw her out about Nova Scotia. Begin with “ So you’ve been to Nova
Scotia?” She replies, “ Yes, she has.” I feel-inclined to ask, “ Well,
and how are they ? ” which I know would be stupid. (Query vulgar ?)
I should like to commence instructing her about Nova Scotia. I
wish Byng had told me before dressing for dinner: he’s got a good
library here.
Happy Thought.—Draw her out in a general way by asking, “ and
what sort of a place is Nova Scotia ? ” This I put rather frowningly,
as if I’d received contradictory accounts about it which had deterred
me from going there.
She answers, “ Which part ? ”
Happy Thought.—To shrug my shoulders and reply, “ Oh, any part,”
leaving it to her. She begins something about Halifax, (Halifax 1
remember of course, and a song commencing, “A Captain bold in
Halifax don’t mention it, might be vulgar) when we hear a noise as
of a band tuning outside the window. Byng explains that, being his
birthday, the band from Dishling (Byng’s village)--
“ A?id ” puts in the Butler, with the air of a man who knows what
good music is, “ the band from Bogley
-y in
1 by
well
hink
!gle.
with
he is
gain,
mces
n the
/ with
" nan I
• ns of
ed to
their
i with
ch he
the bands from Dishling
Byng adopts the Butler’s amendment,
and Bogley come to play during dinner.”
Milburd makes a wry face. The united musicians commence (in
the dark outside) an overture. We listen. Byng’s half-aunt pretends
to be interested, and asks, after a few bars, “ Dear me, what’s that
out of? ”
I think. We all think.
Except Milburd, who exclaims, “Out of? Why out of tune, I
should say.” All laugh. Milburd, I suppose, is one of those wags
who “ set the table in a roar.” Pooh! Vulgar.
Miss Pellingle turns to me and observes, “ that was very funny,
wasn’t it ? ”
Happy Thought.-
The bands from
William Tell.
-To reply deprecatingly, ‘
Bogley and Dishling get
yes : funny, but old.”
the overture to
through
Happy Thought (which has probably occurred D the leader of the united
Dishling and Bogley Ba?ids).—When there’s a difficulty beat the drum.
Another Happy Thought [which, probably, has also occurred to the
leader).—Ophicleide covers a multitude of sins.
Byng goes out to address them. He likes playing, as it were, the
“ Ould Squire among his Happy Tenantry,” or “ The Rightful Lord
of the Manor welcomed Home.” The manor consists of a lawn in
front, a garden at the back, and a yard with the dog in it. The united
bands being treated to two bottles of wine, offer to play for the rest of
the night. Offer declined. Milburd says, “ there wouldn’t be much
rest of the night, if they did.” Table in a roar again. I smile : or they’d
think me envious.
Happy Thought.—~Eunny, but not new.
Ladies retire. Fridoline passing me observes, “ You seemed very
much interested in Nova Scotia.”
She has gone before I can reply. Is it possible that * * Is she
* * * I wonder * * because * * * if I only thought that she * * *
I should like to know if she meant * * * or was it merely
and yet * * *
Happy Thought.—I will.
* * * *
REMISSNESS REPRIMANDED.
It is right that naval officers should know that it is their duty to
keep a sharp look-out. This they will understand from study of the
following paragraph of news
“ Court-Martial on Mr. E. Swain.—Plymouth, Wednesday. A Court-Martial
was held to-day at Devonport on Mr. Edmund Swain, the Master in charge of her
Majesty’s ship, Dryad, when she was stranded iu Whitesand Bay on the 13th inst.
The evidence proved that at the time of the accident the weather was very foggy,
and the Dryad’s compass was I05 points wrong through local attraction, caused by
the vessel’s iron beams. The prisoner was severely reprimanded, and admonished
to be more careful for the future.”
No doubt lie will. Lest a worse thing than a reprimand befall him,
he will take all the care he can, whenever he is at sea, to prevent the
weather from being foggy, and to hinder the iron beams of the vessel
that he is in charge of from attracting the compass.
Bad News eor Puppies.—Dog-Tax reduced—no exemptions.