Punch: Punch (60.1871)

April 8, 1871.J

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

139

of promoting' conversation, would like to ask him what he thinks,
just now, of France, Social and Literary, and of the Monarchy of
the Middle Classes in Paris.

The Commons mustered thinly to hear Mr. Bailie Cochrane
urge upon the Government that something should he done to procure
for France a mitigation of the German terms of peace. Mr. Glad-
stone, in defending the course of the Cabinet, made the best speech
which he has delivered this Session. He objected to being hampered
by any Parliamentary resolution, but promised to avail himself of
any opportunity of lightening matters for the French.

Finally, there was an amusing debate on the Privilege of Married
Women to commit Crime at the suggestion of their Husbands. It
arose out of the case of Martha Torpey of the Diamonds and
Anaesthetic. Me. Douglas Straight made his debut, and explained,
having been an eye-witness of her trial, that her being " a little
woman with a baby," really got her off—the jury waxing senti-
mental. Ridicule of jurymen angered Mr. Montague Chambers.
There was able law-talk, especially by Mr. Jessel and the
Attorney-General on the status of she-criminals, and it is pro-
bable that we shall soon cease to insult a strong-minded and strong-
bodied woman, by acquitting her on the presumptuous presumption
that she Did as She Was Bid.

Saturday. The University Boat Race, and the Isis was again
defeated by the Cam. At least we suppose so. But, as there seemed
to be some difficulty about the Press, we accredited and dispatched
to the scene a Special Reporter of our own, whose portrait we
subjoin.

This individual has not since been heard of, and therefore we are
obliged to borrow from our contemporaries the information that
Light-Blue won by some two lengths. We need hardly say that Mr.
Punch wasn't going to get up in the middle of the night to see a
race on the river. Father Thames appears to have forgotten his
duty to the civilised public. Is this his gratitude for the Embank-
ment, or his revenge for Barking ?

SORS VIRGILIANA FOR THE PARISIANS.
{jEneid. booh viii., I. 274.)

Cingite fronde comas, et pocula porgite dextris :
Communemque vocate Deum, et date vina volentes.
Or, in Mr. Punch's own hexameters—

Garland your hair with wreaths from your Liberty-trees ; fill your
glasses:

Toast " La Commune " as your goddess, and make her guards free
of your cellars.

Cannibalism Extraordinary.

It is our melancholy duty to announce that a gentleman well
known in literary circles and the neighbourhood of Hoxton, a kind
husband, an affectionate father, a devoted friend, and an ex-
churchwarden, one at whom the finger of suspicion has never been
pointed, and on whose character the breath of calumny has never
yet alighted, was the other day found devouring a favourite author !

The He-ight oe Sabbatarianism.—Finding a bank-note on the
pavement on a Sunday, and declining to pick it up.

SCIENCE IN FASHION.

A pull, true, and particular account of the Princess Louise's
wedding-dress appeared, of course, in the Morning Post. It indi-
cated, very signally, what has been for some time observable by any
student of our esteemed friend, Le Follet, that millinery is fast
rising into the dignity of a science. This inventory of " The Bridal
Attire " is, in the complexity of its details, equal to an elaborate
architectural or anatomical analysis. It really may be said to be
quite a model of scientific precision; specific even to the niceties of
botanical nomenclature. Limits of space forbid the description of
the entire costume to be quoted at length, but so much of it as the
concluding portion, comprehending one item, will exemplify the
rest:—

"The "bridal veil is made en suite with the tunic and flounce, but, instead
of the cornucopia a bouquet is substituted, and is worked from a sketch, made
by Her Eoyal Highness. This bouquet is composed of roses in the centre,
surrounded by lighter flowers, among which orange-flowers, myrtle, jasmin,
and myosotis form part. The delicate quaking grass {Briza media) and grace-
ful fronds of fern (Tolyslichum angulare) appear to great advantage on the
net, which is sprigged with small sprays of orange-blossom and marguerites,
and powdered with very small rings."

The exactness with which the quaking-grass {Briza media) and the
fern {Polystichum angulare) are particularised is remarkable. One
wonders, however, that an adept in dress-making so evidently
scientific as the author, whose descriptive powers are instanced
above, omitted to be equally precise in a preceding portion of his
statement, where, having explained the tunic," whereon "the
most_ prominent" objects are medallions containing bouquets" of
certain flowers, he goes on to say that:—

" The medallions are surrounded by a wreath of roses and lilies, and above
is a smaller bouquet of tulips, roses, phlox, coreopsis, wistaria, &c, whilst in
the openings of the ground-work butterflies are introduced with very pleasing
effect."

An accomplished naturalist, no doubt, and writing for the infor-
mation of readers to whom the fashions are a matter of serious study
in connection with universal knowledge, he might as well have
added, to distinctness in point of botany, equal descrimination
respecting entomology. He speaks of butterflies as introduced with
very pleasing effect, among the flowers in the medallions of the
Princess's tunic. How pleasing the effect was we should be able to
imagine all the better if we knew exactly what butterflies those
same were. Another time, perhaps, on a like opportunity, he will
mention the ornamental insects' names, and may tell us that in the
openings of the ground-work, or some other equally suitable region,
were introduced butterflies, namely, for instance, the Swallow-
tailed Butterfly {Papilio Machaon), the Common Blue Butterfly
{Polyommatus Alexis), the Red Admiral (Vanessa Atalanta), the
Peacock {Vanessa lo), the Black-veined White or Hawthorn
Butterfly {Pieris Cratcegi), and the familiar Cabbage Butterfly
{Pontia Brassicce). Moreover, since beetles as well as butterflies
are sometimes included among the decorative elements of feminine
costume, he must not forget to cite the entomological names of the
Coleoptera as well as those of the Lepidoptera in occasionally describ-
ing a dress embellished with insects of both those orders.

THE ORDER OF THE BATH IN PARIS.

At last there really seems to be a glimmering of reason among the
Reds of Paris. See what the Daily News is able to report of them :—

"In the name of public health the Commune requisitions warm baths for
the National Guards."

There is very little doubt that the (black) guards who have been
putting Paris in hot water would most of them be all the better for
a bath in it. Perhaps the next thing they will do will be to requisi-
tion some soft soap, with the intent to give themselves a sanitary
lathering. Considering the dirty work which they have recently
been doing, few of them can boast of having clean hands just at
present; and every sincere friend of order would rejoice if, when
the Great Unwashed have come out of the bath, the Government
were able to give them a good towelling.

A Very Large Family Party.

The total number of authors in Allibone's great Dictionary of
English Literature, we are told, is 46,499, and of these no fewer
than 810 are—perhaps we ought not to break the news so abruptly-—
Smiths !

motto for sir jules.

Here is "Benedick, the married man." Sir Jules' motto must
be Benedict, the U-Knighted man.