Punch (63.1872)

November 16. 1872.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

199

LATEST FROM DUNDEE.

(Where, readers will be happy to know, the Maids' Rebellion has revived in great force.)
Mistress. I did not Ring, Mart."

Mary. " I know that, Mum ; but as I was Moping in the Kitohbn, I

thought I 'd come and SlT A bit with you ! "

A FLOURISH ON THE FRENCH HORN.

General Chanzy, the other day, on officially assuming; the command of the
7th Army Corps at Tours, addressed to his troops an Order of the Day,
wherein, according to a telegram from Paris, he informed them that:—

France, which has heen enabled to resist great trials, is confident in her valour. She
will not descend from the rank she has conquered in the world, but will continue the
great part assigned to her by Providence, and render the future secure. France has need
of great virtues, and the army must give an example of them to the nation. Standing
above parties, the army must be unaffected by the mean passions which divide and agitate
the country."

Don't you seem to have read all this innumerahle times before ? Doesn't
it sound simply like one more flourish of trumpets, alarum, excursion, regu-
lation tantara, and matter-of-course fanfaronade ? Seems it not as familiar
to your ears as quack, quack, quack, eehaw, or cock-a-doodle doo ? Neverthe-
less, on looking into it, you will find that it contains ideas. Its second and
third sentences are not merely full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.
The gallant General distinctly confesses that France has need of great virtues.
There is, indeed, great room for improvement in France, as well, at least, as
everywhere else. But can the French Army do what General Chanzy
says it must ? Is it possible for soldiers to give France an example of the
great virtues which she doubtless needs ? Of some, perhaps, but surely not of
all the virtues. Those same warriors are not generally husbands. They
cannot exemplify the domestic virtues. And then will it be possible for the
Army to subsist unaffected by the mean passions which divide and agitate the
country out of whose people it is drawn? Will it, indeed, have the sense
and the unanimity necessary to enable it to repudiate, for instance, the vain-
glory which has for so long kept Frenchmen divided against each other,
agitated amongst themselves, and agitating mankind ?

"Thought is Free."

Shakspeare.

A man may think freely without being a free-thinker. Some of our bigoted
friends are unable to understand this.

THE NEMESIS OE AYRTON.

London has Parks for swells to show,

And snobs at them to stare :
And pretty little folks to play,

In pretty nursemaids' care:
And if our Guards, sometimes, those maids

Will with sheeps'-eyes beguile,
And maids be so much off their guards,

As on our Guards to smile,

Paterfamilias may regret

That red-coats should have charms,
That pretty nurserymaids will have eyes

For more than babes in arms ;
But not the less the Parks he'd have

For general use kept free,
Where somebodies may ride and drive,

For nobodies to see.

So as he has a Parliament,

And Parliament makes laws,
And some of them prohibitive,

Each with its penal clause ;
And as he has some fools who names

As demagogues would win,
And as these fools will use the Parks

To spout their nonsense in,—

As he remembers Beales his bounce,

And Walpole's tears of woe,
And park-rails levelled with the ground,

And order rough-laid low,
He calls on Aybton for an Act

His parks to rule and guard,
And if a spouting-place be given,

To mete it out per yard.

So said, so done : the Bill's brought in,

Discussed, passed into Law :
Ayrtonian regulations framed

The metes and bounds to draw,
That fence about a certain space

For fools to spout their rot,
As you might set a place apart—

" Here rubbish may be shot."

But lo ! the first occasion given

For demagogues to talk,
Right in the teeth of Ayrton's Act,

And his ukase they walk :
Boldly erect their spouting-stands

Beyond the measured belt,
And Ayrton's name and his placard

With mud profanely pelt.

Ah me, my Ayrton, who has thrown

More mud, at times, than thou ?
Is't bettering thy instruction, these

Their dirt are throwing now ?
"jFling mud enough," the proverb says,

" And some of it will stick."
Such was thy rule ; with tongue and pen

Who laid it on so thick ?

And now thy Nemesis is here ;

Abuse and filth they squirt:
Thy name bespattering with their scorn,

Thy orders with their dirt.
If " like to like," that kissing rules,

Applies to cuffs as well,
Who but an Ayrton should be set

The London roughs to quell ?

Legal Changes.

" The Eight Hon. Richard Dowse, who was sworn in as one
of the Barons of the Irish Court of Exchequer yesterday, took his
seat to-day. It is understood that to-day Mr. Palles will be
called as Attorney-General, and Mr. Law as Solicitor-General.

Lucky Ireland! to have placed at her disposal, in one
day, both Law and Wisdom—for any one, with half an
eye, can see that Palles is only another way of spelling
Pallas. Will any one now say that justice is not done
to Ireland.? Telegraph, immediately, to Mr. Froude
in America.