DOI issue:
October 11, 1873
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16937#0159
"" ~ --T-
October 11, 1873.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
CATCHING A TARTAR.
H! if all Britons were
Grahameses, bri-
gands would do well
to give them a wide
berth. Well may
the Correspondent
who forwards the
account of the en-
counter of this preux
chevalier with bri-
gands at Denia, near
Y alencia, describe
him as “a man of
considerable nerve,
great presence of
mind, and ready
resource.” This we
call very mild lan-
guage indeed, after
reading Mr. Gra-
hame’s deposition
before the Justice of
the Peace,—how he
was riding home the
other evening in his
tartana (a Spanish
one-horse shay) when
the vehicle was sud-
denly stopped by a
band of “ six, eight, or more,” brigands armed with guns—four
on the right of him, two on the left of him, to say nothing of a
dagger in the rear—in reply to whose summons Mr. Grahame
promptly let fly four shots from his revolver, right and left, and,
under their cover, leapt out, and ran for his life. A gun, loaded with
buck shot, was fired at him, hit him in the thigh, and brought him
down. Leaping up again, he drew the fire of “ from twelve to six-
teen barrels,” whose bullets whizzed round his head and body. By
this time some of the villains—worse luck for them!—had come up
to him. The indomitable Briton threw himself on one of them,
wrenched his gun from him, knocked him to the ground with the
butt-end, and followed up this by flooring two more in the same
fashion. One only was left: the ruffian aimed at him, but Grahame
was equal to the emergency, and reversing the gun, with which he
had already floored the three, he let fly at the fourth, who at the
same moment let fly at him. Our hero saw no more of this worthy—
no doubt he was the owner of the dead body afterwards picked up.
“ Some of the other ruffians now coming forward,” the indomitable
Briton began, with both hands, to throw stones at them from a heap,
“fortunately beside him on the road.” Stones in the hands of
Grahame may well have seemed to these ruffians, after their expe-
rience, more formidable than the bullets in their own guns, for the
deponent adds, with charming naivete, ‘ ‘ When I had beaten them
olf, I ran in the direction of Denia, calling for help at the top of
my voice.” The top of his voice could not have been very high, one
would fancy, after his previous exercise ; nor can we be surprised to
read of his soon after ‘ ‘ lying down, faint from loss of blood, among
the vines,” and hearing the tartana driven off at full speed.
There is a smack of Falstaff’s exploit at Gad’s-hill about this
story, which makes one very glad to read, at the end of it, that very
substantial and ghastly pieces de conviction were forthcoming in
proof of the tale :—
“ As soon as the news was conveyed to Denia, the authorities proceeded at
once to the spot, where they found a man disguised and masked, quite dead,
a loose jacket, and a good deal of blood. The pony and tartana were found
near Ondara, three miles distant from Denia, the pony covered with wounds
inflicted with a knife or dagger to make the poor animal go its fastest, and
the cushions of the tartana saturated with the blood of the wounded brigands.”
If this fall into the hands of Mr. Grahame, or his friends, don’t
let them be angry with Punch for a doubt only suggested by the
tremendous prowess of this British Paladin. The story reads too
good to be true in these milk-and-water days. Punch can remember
nothing like it, out of the more audacious than veracious chronicles
of poor Charles Lever or Captain Mayne Reid.
The next time we hear of an express train being stopped by a
handfull of Aragonese freebooters, or an Australian mail-cart
‘ bailed - up ” by a leash of bushrangers, let us remember Grahame,
and his single-handed encounter with the Yalencian brigand band
‘ of six, or eight, or more”—and with no further remembrance of
Falstaff’s men in buckram, than may prompt the hope that Gra-
hame’s arithmetic may be as safely relied upon as his revolver, and
that he has not seen—however he may have killed—double, in this
most heroic of all recorded engagements with rascals at long odds.
147
SOCIAL SCIENCE.
The Social Science Association has been holding its Annual Con-
gress at Norwich. The Members, both ladies and gentlemen, talked
on a great many subjects, but the programme was not so complete
as it might have been. Want of time alone can have been the
reason why an odd half-hour or two was not given up to the dis-
cussion of some of the following important questions :—
Is it desirable to make any change in the rules which at present
govern the precedence of guests at dinner-parties ? Difficulties
every day arise: as, for example, when the wives of the chief
Banker, the principal Brewer, the leading Solicitor, and the Doctor
in the best practice, in a country town, have all to be taken down
from the drawing-room to the dining-room; or when the Senior
Curate of the parish church, the Incumbent of the cliapel of ease,
the Master of the Grammar School, a Fellow of St. Michael’s Oxford,
and a Fellow of St. Martin’s Cambridge, meet together at the same
party.
How far is it allowable to depart from strict veracity, when you
are expected to congratulate a friend on a marriage engagement
which you have every reason to believe is about the worst he (or
she) could have contracted; or to express a candid opinion of a book
presented to you by a sensitive and fiery young author, which you
are certain will bring him neither fame nor fortune; or to say what
you really think about a little Cousin in long clothes, when “it” is
suddenly introduced to you by a partial mother and a prejudiced
nurse ?
There are Chambers of Commerce and Chambers of Agriculture—•
why should there not be also established Chambers of Fashion ?
Composed of women of influence, position, taste, and good sense,
selected from all ranks of society, and assisted by some eminent
milliners and dressmakers, sitting as assessors and advisers, but not
allowed to vote, such tribunals, meeting twice a year, in the
Spring and Autumn, to determine the shapes, colours, and mate-
rials of the bonnets, hats, dresses, and outdoor garments to be worn
in the ensuing Summer and Winter, and the style in which the hair
should be arranged, would exercise a most beneficial influence over
modern costume. They might issue a code of instructions—signed
by the Duchess of Darlington as Chairwoman of the Chamber—
framed to prevent those outrageous mistakes which, under the pre-
sent system of unrestrained freedom, are committed every day and
everywhere—colours not matching with colours, colours in violent
contrast with complexions, the stout adopting fashions only designed
for the slim, the short figuring in raiment expressly intended for
the tall, and the old and the young, the clumsy and the graceful,
the plain and the beautiful, wearing exactly the same apparel.
Are the wedding ceremonies and customs now prevailing in Great
Britain and her Colonies capable of improvement ? Should a limit
be assigned to the number of officiating bridesmaids and clergymen?
Would it be feasible to establish some plan of barter, whereby
young brides might be enabled to exchange their duplicate wedding
presents ? What are the comparative advantages of long and short
engagements ; and what proportion ought the gifts, usually made by
the gentleman to the lady during the period of preliminary proba-
tion, to bear to his income ?
Is a mistress justified in interfering with her servant’s dress, and
are lace falls, feathers, polonaises, and jewellery, compatible with 1
the emoluments and position of maids of all work ? Would it be t
possible to adopt one uniform hour throughout the United Kingdom
at which servants should be expected to be “ in ” on Sunday even-
ing ? How are the prejudices of the Kitchen against the use of
Australian provisions to be overcome ?
This is an ingenious age. England has produced some of the !
greatest inventions of modern times. Englishmen have made some
of the most remarkable discoveries which history records. But
there seem to be limits to the ingenuity of our countrymen and
countrywomen. Perhaps the offer of a handsome premium on the
part of the Social Science Association, coupled with the exclusive
right of the inventor to issue licences for a long term of years,
might elicit a new set of Quadrille figures ?
Can trustworthy statistical information be obtained showing the
number of children respectively, to whom one, two, or three
Christian names are now given P Is there not an increasing tendency
to disown such antiquated names as William, Richard, and Robert,
Mary, Anne, and Jane, in favour of Ernest, Herbert, and Sydney,
Edith, Maud, and Florence? The inquiry might be extended to
the growing habit of prefixing a second and more euphonious and
aristocratic surname, so that the world is gradually becoming
peopled with Pelham Smiths, Hamilton Browns, Harcourt Joneses,
Fitzroy Robinsons, and Wentworth Wilsons.
Are the works of Shakspeare and Sir Walter Scott extensively
read in the family circle ? How many young persons of either §ex
can you remember to have seen, since the last Congress, absorbed in
the perusal of Waverley or the Winter's Tale f What acquaintance
has the present generation with Milton, or Dryden, or Pope, or ;
October 11, 1873.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
CATCHING A TARTAR.
H! if all Britons were
Grahameses, bri-
gands would do well
to give them a wide
berth. Well may
the Correspondent
who forwards the
account of the en-
counter of this preux
chevalier with bri-
gands at Denia, near
Y alencia, describe
him as “a man of
considerable nerve,
great presence of
mind, and ready
resource.” This we
call very mild lan-
guage indeed, after
reading Mr. Gra-
hame’s deposition
before the Justice of
the Peace,—how he
was riding home the
other evening in his
tartana (a Spanish
one-horse shay) when
the vehicle was sud-
denly stopped by a
band of “ six, eight, or more,” brigands armed with guns—four
on the right of him, two on the left of him, to say nothing of a
dagger in the rear—in reply to whose summons Mr. Grahame
promptly let fly four shots from his revolver, right and left, and,
under their cover, leapt out, and ran for his life. A gun, loaded with
buck shot, was fired at him, hit him in the thigh, and brought him
down. Leaping up again, he drew the fire of “ from twelve to six-
teen barrels,” whose bullets whizzed round his head and body. By
this time some of the villains—worse luck for them!—had come up
to him. The indomitable Briton threw himself on one of them,
wrenched his gun from him, knocked him to the ground with the
butt-end, and followed up this by flooring two more in the same
fashion. One only was left: the ruffian aimed at him, but Grahame
was equal to the emergency, and reversing the gun, with which he
had already floored the three, he let fly at the fourth, who at the
same moment let fly at him. Our hero saw no more of this worthy—
no doubt he was the owner of the dead body afterwards picked up.
“ Some of the other ruffians now coming forward,” the indomitable
Briton began, with both hands, to throw stones at them from a heap,
“fortunately beside him on the road.” Stones in the hands of
Grahame may well have seemed to these ruffians, after their expe-
rience, more formidable than the bullets in their own guns, for the
deponent adds, with charming naivete, ‘ ‘ When I had beaten them
olf, I ran in the direction of Denia, calling for help at the top of
my voice.” The top of his voice could not have been very high, one
would fancy, after his previous exercise ; nor can we be surprised to
read of his soon after ‘ ‘ lying down, faint from loss of blood, among
the vines,” and hearing the tartana driven off at full speed.
There is a smack of Falstaff’s exploit at Gad’s-hill about this
story, which makes one very glad to read, at the end of it, that very
substantial and ghastly pieces de conviction were forthcoming in
proof of the tale :—
“ As soon as the news was conveyed to Denia, the authorities proceeded at
once to the spot, where they found a man disguised and masked, quite dead,
a loose jacket, and a good deal of blood. The pony and tartana were found
near Ondara, three miles distant from Denia, the pony covered with wounds
inflicted with a knife or dagger to make the poor animal go its fastest, and
the cushions of the tartana saturated with the blood of the wounded brigands.”
If this fall into the hands of Mr. Grahame, or his friends, don’t
let them be angry with Punch for a doubt only suggested by the
tremendous prowess of this British Paladin. The story reads too
good to be true in these milk-and-water days. Punch can remember
nothing like it, out of the more audacious than veracious chronicles
of poor Charles Lever or Captain Mayne Reid.
The next time we hear of an express train being stopped by a
handfull of Aragonese freebooters, or an Australian mail-cart
‘ bailed - up ” by a leash of bushrangers, let us remember Grahame,
and his single-handed encounter with the Yalencian brigand band
‘ of six, or eight, or more”—and with no further remembrance of
Falstaff’s men in buckram, than may prompt the hope that Gra-
hame’s arithmetic may be as safely relied upon as his revolver, and
that he has not seen—however he may have killed—double, in this
most heroic of all recorded engagements with rascals at long odds.
147
SOCIAL SCIENCE.
The Social Science Association has been holding its Annual Con-
gress at Norwich. The Members, both ladies and gentlemen, talked
on a great many subjects, but the programme was not so complete
as it might have been. Want of time alone can have been the
reason why an odd half-hour or two was not given up to the dis-
cussion of some of the following important questions :—
Is it desirable to make any change in the rules which at present
govern the precedence of guests at dinner-parties ? Difficulties
every day arise: as, for example, when the wives of the chief
Banker, the principal Brewer, the leading Solicitor, and the Doctor
in the best practice, in a country town, have all to be taken down
from the drawing-room to the dining-room; or when the Senior
Curate of the parish church, the Incumbent of the cliapel of ease,
the Master of the Grammar School, a Fellow of St. Michael’s Oxford,
and a Fellow of St. Martin’s Cambridge, meet together at the same
party.
How far is it allowable to depart from strict veracity, when you
are expected to congratulate a friend on a marriage engagement
which you have every reason to believe is about the worst he (or
she) could have contracted; or to express a candid opinion of a book
presented to you by a sensitive and fiery young author, which you
are certain will bring him neither fame nor fortune; or to say what
you really think about a little Cousin in long clothes, when “it” is
suddenly introduced to you by a partial mother and a prejudiced
nurse ?
There are Chambers of Commerce and Chambers of Agriculture—•
why should there not be also established Chambers of Fashion ?
Composed of women of influence, position, taste, and good sense,
selected from all ranks of society, and assisted by some eminent
milliners and dressmakers, sitting as assessors and advisers, but not
allowed to vote, such tribunals, meeting twice a year, in the
Spring and Autumn, to determine the shapes, colours, and mate-
rials of the bonnets, hats, dresses, and outdoor garments to be worn
in the ensuing Summer and Winter, and the style in which the hair
should be arranged, would exercise a most beneficial influence over
modern costume. They might issue a code of instructions—signed
by the Duchess of Darlington as Chairwoman of the Chamber—
framed to prevent those outrageous mistakes which, under the pre-
sent system of unrestrained freedom, are committed every day and
everywhere—colours not matching with colours, colours in violent
contrast with complexions, the stout adopting fashions only designed
for the slim, the short figuring in raiment expressly intended for
the tall, and the old and the young, the clumsy and the graceful,
the plain and the beautiful, wearing exactly the same apparel.
Are the wedding ceremonies and customs now prevailing in Great
Britain and her Colonies capable of improvement ? Should a limit
be assigned to the number of officiating bridesmaids and clergymen?
Would it be feasible to establish some plan of barter, whereby
young brides might be enabled to exchange their duplicate wedding
presents ? What are the comparative advantages of long and short
engagements ; and what proportion ought the gifts, usually made by
the gentleman to the lady during the period of preliminary proba-
tion, to bear to his income ?
Is a mistress justified in interfering with her servant’s dress, and
are lace falls, feathers, polonaises, and jewellery, compatible with 1
the emoluments and position of maids of all work ? Would it be t
possible to adopt one uniform hour throughout the United Kingdom
at which servants should be expected to be “ in ” on Sunday even-
ing ? How are the prejudices of the Kitchen against the use of
Australian provisions to be overcome ?
This is an ingenious age. England has produced some of the !
greatest inventions of modern times. Englishmen have made some
of the most remarkable discoveries which history records. But
there seem to be limits to the ingenuity of our countrymen and
countrywomen. Perhaps the offer of a handsome premium on the
part of the Social Science Association, coupled with the exclusive
right of the inventor to issue licences for a long term of years,
might elicit a new set of Quadrille figures ?
Can trustworthy statistical information be obtained showing the
number of children respectively, to whom one, two, or three
Christian names are now given P Is there not an increasing tendency
to disown such antiquated names as William, Richard, and Robert,
Mary, Anne, and Jane, in favour of Ernest, Herbert, and Sydney,
Edith, Maud, and Florence? The inquiry might be extended to
the growing habit of prefixing a second and more euphonious and
aristocratic surname, so that the world is gradually becoming
peopled with Pelham Smiths, Hamilton Browns, Harcourt Joneses,
Fitzroy Robinsons, and Wentworth Wilsons.
Are the works of Shakspeare and Sir Walter Scott extensively
read in the family circle ? How many young persons of either §ex
can you remember to have seen, since the last Congress, absorbed in
the perusal of Waverley or the Winter's Tale f What acquaintance
has the present generation with Milton, or Dryden, or Pope, or ;