Punch (71.1876)

November 11, 1876.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

209

THE SLEEPING BEAUTY."

"Nervous? oh dear no ! I only acted overs in Private Theatricals,
Mr. Jones, and, although it was an important Part, I had nothing to
say !"

" Really ? What was the Part ? "
'' Can't yo v G uess ? "/ 1

ARCTIC DIFFICULTIES.

The welcome return of the heroic Arctic Explorers
affords Society a fresh topic of conversation for the time.
The Expedition haying come back rather unexpectedly,
it is to be feared that Society is not sufficiently well
prepared for the demand thus suddenly made upon its
stores of knowledge. Let us supply a few simple tests
and institute a new kind of " Polo."

Does Society know what is meant by the North Pole, and
where the North Pole is ? and what is likely to happen
to those, if any, who may reach it? what, when they
had got there, would be the state of the case as to the
compass, and the stars, and the degrees of latitude and
longitude, and things in general ?

Does Society know wbat is the latitude of tbe North
Pole, and generally what is understood by the term
" latitude," and wherein it differs from longitude, and
why both are so called ?

What does Society understand by " Lat. 83 deg.
7 min. N. " ?

Can Society say why such repeated efforts have been
made to reach the North Pole ?

Does Society know the difference between the North
Pole and the South Pole, and whether it is very hot, or
very cold at the latter place ?

Wbat does Society know about Greenland, Baffin's
Bay, the " Palaeocrystic Ocean," Zero, Freezing-point,
the Esquimaux, and Pemmican ?

Can Society name any three great Arctic Explorers,
living or dead, besides the Commanders of this last
Expedition and Sin John Franklin ?

THE DOUBLE EVENT.

Remember, remember,

The Ninth of November !
Birthday at Sandringham Hall—

Speechifications,

Illuminations,
Dinner, and supper, and ball.

Remember, Remember,

The Ninth of November !
Lord Mayor and Sheriffs for hosts-

Church-bells a-ringing,

Glee-singers singing,
Turtle, and Turbot, and Toasts!

Dr. Slade Settled.—" Qui facit per Allie-(iwi .')
facit per se." _

A Port(e) Admiral.—Hobart Pasha.

excommunicated wretches, if after their death the Pope neverthe-
less considers them not past praying for, and even has the charity,
in fact, to pray for them. We are irresistibly reminded of another
illustrious martyr to misrepresentation, equally magnanimous.
" Charity, my dear," said Mr. Pecksniff, " when I take my chamber
candlestick to-night, remind me to be more than usually particular
in praying for Mr. Anthony Chuzzlewit, who has done me an in-
justice ? " Could he not good-naturedly go a little further in for-
getting a quarrel, and manage to make it up with the existing
Italian Government ?

A JOKE FOR A JOKER.

Dear Sir Wilfrid,

Of course you have read all about the Arctic Expedition ;
particularly the interesting narrative given by the Rev. Mr. Hod-
son, Chaplain of the Discovery. In October of last year, when,
Winter began, during which season that vessel wintered in " Dis-
covery Harbour," and the thermometer fell to many degrees, at one
time 70°, below zero ; then, according to the statement of that
Reverend Gentleman—what do you think ? Why, actually—

" The men had an extra glass of grog served out to them, a walk of a mile
in length was made in the ice by scraping away the snow, and this walk for
exercise was kept clear during the winter."

Fancy—as if their walking exercise would not have been amply
sufficient, at least with the accompaniment of a cup of tea or coffee,
to keep the men quite warm enough—the excessive absurdity of
serving out to them not merely a glass, but absolutely an extra
glass of grog! Hence it appears that, ordinarily in the Arctic

regions, even when the cold was little if any below zero, they
were allowed at least as much as a glass of grog daily; and,
except those who made the grog and those who drank it, good-
ness only knows how strong it was! Here is an enormity for
which pray do not forget, the next time you harangue a Tee-
total Permissive" Meeting, to denounce the Admiralty. And
here is a joke for you to let off, after your manner, upon that occa-
sion. Say that the only shadow of excuse to be made for a crew
drinking, or being suffered to drink, grog, at a place above 81° North
latitude, is that the climate those topers were in is not a tem-
perate one. This, as a bit of anti-drink fun, will be said to be so
like your dry humour.

Ever yours, my dear Sir Wilfrid, ™

"Sic Vos Non Vobis."

Italy has set up—and, indeed, established—the claim of Andrea
Cesalpino, of Arezzo, one of her most famous men of science in the
sixteenth century, to the great discovery of the circulation of the
blood! So England must be content to view Haevey's claims to
the discovery as mere Harvey's Sauce !

pen-slip or landslip?
QL propos of the Reported Crack in Chelsea.)

Let us hope it is the report, not the Embankment, that is deficien
in foundation.