Punch (72.1877)

June 23, 1877.]

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI,

285

"What can he mean, and does Lobd D.
Pretend to believe no more than he ? "

(With a down, derry, derry down .')

To dream-land they dropped off again,
(Down, a down, a down, hey down !)

Still keeping np the same old strain.
(With a down /)

Now Heaven send, if they woti't awake,

Less row'the three may learn to make.
( With a dotvn, derry, derry doivn .')

MR. PUNCH'S SELECT COMMITTEES.

No. III.—On Amateur Acting.

jrfr focr examined.

Q. I : believe
yonr chief em-
ployment in life
is amateur act-
k ing ?

is A. Yes. Iam
N a clerk in a
jj Government
f Office, but I de-
vote most of the
1„ L J-^O^ time not claimed
— - -^ by the Service

to learning my
various parts.
Q. Have you had much experience
amateur acting ?
^ \ ' /P^l' ^ great deal. "When I was

will AM • seventeen I played the First Officer
, /M lysp^ in the Lady of Lyons, and at

7° E ' 1 1 r?^~^ eighteen doubled Ltomeo and the

% pa-/\ 6 Nurse in Romeo and Juliet.

\ \T / *6 ^ ^nat are y°ur favourite

<^ Ff parts ?

•^fe^A ^i. Dazzle in London Assurance,

Sir Peter Teazle in T/je ScAoo/ /or
Scandal, Bob Acres in <SAe Stoops
to Conquer, Mr. Golightly in £e«4 Me Five Shillings, and
Maebeth.

Q. What is your idea of acting ?

-4. To learn my words, and to go to a theatre where the piece for
which I am cast is being played constantly, with a view to copying
every movement of the actor whose part I am afterwards to sustain.

Q. Do you not think that it would be better to think out your
parts for yourself, instead of giving a weak imitation of an old
original ?

A. Certainly not. My First Officer in the Lady of Lyons was
never a great success until I had seen it played by some one else.
Q. What are your objects in acting ?

A. First, to show myself in various costumes to my friends and
relatives, and, secondly, to benefit some obscure charity.

Q. Does the obscure charity benefit very largely by your exer-
tions ?

A. Not very frequently. After all expenses have been paid, a
five-pound note is rather a handsome average for the surplus.

Q. Are you aware that amateur performances in the country
frequently do great injury to professional actors ?

A. So I have been told.

Q. Are you aware that many a provincial manager and his com-
pany have been reduced to penury by these entertainments ?
A. I believe so.

Q. Would you be surprised if a manager were to offer you more
than thirty shillings a week to become a member of his company ?

A. I should be very much surprised indeed.

Q. Would you (and I appeal to you as a sensible man) play the
part of audience at an amateur performance in which you had no
personal interest—I mean no part to play ?

A. Under no consideration whatever.

[The Witness then withdrew.

Freaks of Fashion.

Sow to be d la Mode.

The Complexion—Undisguisedly disguised.
Square Corsages—Openly cut to the heart.
Ball-Dresses—Barely decent.
Skirts—Tied back with effrontery.

THREE ANNIVERSARIES.

John Wycliffe, 1377. William Caxton, 1477. Pius IX., 1877.

Theee dates ; three links, unsevered though apart,
On Time's long chain. It fills the brooding heart
With thoughts that halt 'twixt hope and fear to mark
This conflict of the Light against the Dark,
Unchanging, and unending. Wtcliffe's tongue
And Caxton's type ; the fiery zeal that flung
Truth's gage against all odds, the sober wit
That gave the goddess wings, and bade her flit
From cloister down to cottage, with the light
Which, the more Popes would quench it, beamed more
bright.

The selfsame light whose permeative glow

From Lutterworth five hundred years ago

Startled Pope, Prince, and Prelate with its gleam,

And just a century later with a beam

Of broad diffusiveness was winged to fly

Abroad from Westminster's old Almonry,—

Still leads our Vanguard legions, while, with fear

And pious blindness smitten, in the rear

The lovers of the Darkness crouch, and curse

Those dauntless facers of the dawn. Perverse

And purblind Priestdom, ever slow to learn,

Why so persistently Light's blessing spurn ?

Why try your policy of Night again,

Foolish as fruitless, puerile as vain ?

When did anathemas stay truth ? As well

Essay with scourge to check the Ocean's swell,

Or hold the dawn in fetters. Geegoey failed ;

His fiery fulminations nought availed

Against the beacon-fire that Wxclifee raised—

From which a kindling brand soon brightly blazed

On every hearth in England. But what hope,

Born of the shadows, buoys our later Pope,

The kindly age-worn man, whose Jubilee

E'en stubborn foes could wish that they were free

To celebrate in kindness ? Yet o'er all

Wtcliffe illumed this Pope would spread the pall

Of priestly obscuration ! Freedom, faith

That freedom well might nurse nor suffer scaith,

Popular learning, free thought, liberty

To sacred books of winning access free,

These Wycliffe stood for, these stout Caxton's prets

Helped onward to a slow but sure success;

These Pies and his guards e'en now would stay,

Invoking night at the full noon of day,

As did their predecessors at its dawn,

And cursing Wisdom's seed as Evil's spawn.

The Jester, sobered at the saddening sight,

Sighs while he smiles, yet, loyal to the light,

Checking awhile the jingle of his mirth,

Before the sad-faced sage of Lutterworth—

An earlier Luthee, born of British blood,

As keen as calmly wise, as brave as good—

Puts by his baton that stout soul to greet,

And lays the laurel at John Wycliffe's feet.

Something' Like Military Intelligence.

" The troopship Assistance, with the 104th Kegiment on board, has arrived
at Kingstown, from Jersey, and proceeded to the Curragh Camp for the drift
season,*'

So says a recent item in the Military Intelligence of the Lrish
Times. Talk of " Horse Marines " contemptuously after this ! Of
course they dragged the ship.

Submarine Fish-Frightening.

It seems that the West Country fishermen are inflicting grievous
damage, and some alarm, on the shoals of sea-fish, by exploding
charges of dynamite on the ground where they have hitherto been
content to trawl for bass and brill, plaice and soles.

This is clearly an extension of the use of the^sA-torpedo which
Me. Whitehead never bargained for.

ecclesiastical and spoeting intelligence.
Great Match.—-The English Church Union Eleven against the
Church Association.