DOI issue:
July 17, 1886
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.17656#0035
July 17, 1886.] PUNCH, OK THE LONDON CHAEIVAEI. _29
HITS [AT WIMBLEDON. By D. Crambo, Jun.
Signalling a Bull's-eye. A Crack Shot. Marking the highest possible Score. Finishing with a Magpie. Service Firearms.
ft
W1H
Competitor for the "Windmill. Signalling Caw. " Screw " Wind-gange. Marksman making a Heye Score. Pat-roll.
situations, and a scene between Amyntor and Clione, which-but
ycra shall hear it. Come and see me to-morrow when I will show yon a
few models andplans; one for a deluge, another for an earthquake (when
Amyntor defies the Proconsul)—fine situation—and I have such an
idea for a speech for Amyntor in this scene, the spirit of which I am
sure you, with your poetic fire, will seize at once, and will make a
great thing of it. Oddly enough I had a similar subject in my head
for a play, and had had some sketches made, and had written a few
scenes, which I was about to show to {the name is almost illegible,
but the remaining letters are apparently lH* rm* *"), when
fortunately your letter and MS. arrived.
You know with whom I much infinitely prefer to collaborate—I
think. Come and see me before I quit England and have half-an-
hour s chat—indeed five minutes where kindred spirits meet will
settle it,—and then we will astonish the public!
Tours enthusiastically, W * * * * *
{The rest of the signature is lost.)
vm.
My Evee Deaeest Mamma,
I feel the time is come for telling you the rele truth about
this scool. I am sory to say it is not nearly such a nice place as it
looked when you came to see it, hut you must not be unhappy about
that. I am trying hard to be brave and chearf ul. Now I will tell
you about the life here. My form-master means to be kind, I am
shore; but he is hasty, and throws books at. the boys, and, if he
misses a boy, he canes him. But I have not been caned yet—not by
him. The Head Master caned me because I would say my diktasion
the way you taught me. But I do not mind, my dere mother, and
my whales are almost well. There is rather a nice boy sits next to
me. He says he has supressed his measels for a fortnight, and is
afraid he can't keep them in much longer. The other boys are very
well, except two in bed in my dormitory with a kind of rash, which
the matron says is only tifoid. German and French measels have
been very popular, and a man with crape round his hat calls every
morning with the other tradesmen for orders, whichlooks funnyatfirst.
J. here are a good many bulleys among the big boys—one boxed
my ears with a cricket-bat last week, though I am beginning to
hear with my left if you shout down it; and then, as Uncle Bob
stv, ^° ^e knoked about, but it is not pleasant at first.
. eight before last we had a burglar break in. He fired his
pistie at a boy who bared his progress, but he did not take my life,
only my toy yat, and the cake Aunt Matilda gave me; so I ought
to be a grateful boy.
th me °^ ^e ys thought the hedmaster might have done more
j an ororl under his bed while the burglar was here; but you know,
ere mother, he could not help being atacked by pannic; and, after
TlT6 ^ ^s own b°ys' onty borders.
biffffV3 a g00a- dea* °* drinking going on in the bedrooms by the
boys; but praps, as they say, it is only water, which it
certainly risembles a little.
wi+b wunder if the holidays ever will come, and my hed akes
,T 80 HHioh studdy, and I feel very languid when I go to bed and
thouS?T to sleaP- StiU 1 iope * sllaL1 servive one term of it,
lona-pr promise 1 will write the moment I feel I oan bear it no
s r" Tour afectionat Son,
Tommy Washtnoton Eaencake.
P-S. Plese don't alude to anything in this, if you write here.
{Strictly Private.) Madame will not sing for less than £800. If,
however, in addition to engagement, you could guarantee her a
show for the pair of them before Royalty (State Concert preferred),
I dare say I could arrange for a reduction, of which half could be
taken in unnumbered tickets, gallery and amphitheatre. (Address
as usual.)
x.
My Deaeest Alice, South Audley Street, July 7.
I scaecely breathe, I dare not move,—this dreadful heat!
Think of my devotion in writing to you! "We have had a terrible
week. I had, of course, to take Maude to Lord's. Nearly every one
in white, very few people one knew. The young men grow more and
more ill-bred. A friend of Reginald's nearly laughed when I asked
him why the Cambridge men run after the Oxford men's knocks,—I
would let them ran after their own knocks. I think the Australians
won. Talking of Australians, I never saw anyone like Maeia. You
know Reginald found her and married her at Melbourne, and she is
being trotted round before the family, for inspection. She takes it
very calmly. She admires nothing. Westminster Abbey, reminds
her a little of the Rev. Mr. Gilkes s tabernacle at Boonoorung. Of
course, she needs everything, but I oan do nothing with her. I took
her to Felise's, and Madame Styley's—she said she saw she would
have to write out to Melbourne for what she needed! Can one be
more Colonial? However, I have done my duty. Oh, these
Elections! Nothing but Politics. When will people be rational
again ! Ever yours, dearest Alice,
Caroline Beancepath.
(To be continued.)
BUCKINGHAM PALACE r. ALBERT PALACE.
It was unfortunate that H.R.H. should have selected last Friday
for a State Ball at Buckingham Palace, as on that same night,
Mr. William Holland, the People's Caterer, was giving an " Aris-
tocratic Fete" at the Albert Palace, Battersea Park, which must
have robbed the Royal saloons of many of their most distinguished
ornaments. The privilege of admission to the Albert Palace was,
as placarded at the door, "for cash only," and this announcement
may have caused some of the leading members of the aristocracy
to turn back and seek the less exclusive hospitality of Buckingham
Palace, where anyone could get in merely for the asking. But those
who were fortunate enough to possess the necessary silver vouchers
spent a really very happy evening in shooting for nuts, taking light
refreshments, listening to the singing in the Cafe Chantant,
applauding William the Caterer's speech, and witnessing the comical
fireworks. The Aristocratic Feters, having evidently ordered their
carriages much later than was necessary, were for the most part
compelled to " step it" all the way home, the supply of cabs being
very limited, or perhaps the coachmen had made a mistake between
the two palaces, as there were a considerable number of aristocratic
equipages waiting in St. James's Park. Next Season two such great
events must not happen on the same evening.
Me. Gladstone's next Teanslation.—From Home Rule to the
Rules of Homee.
HITS [AT WIMBLEDON. By D. Crambo, Jun.
Signalling a Bull's-eye. A Crack Shot. Marking the highest possible Score. Finishing with a Magpie. Service Firearms.
ft
W1H
Competitor for the "Windmill. Signalling Caw. " Screw " Wind-gange. Marksman making a Heye Score. Pat-roll.
situations, and a scene between Amyntor and Clione, which-but
ycra shall hear it. Come and see me to-morrow when I will show yon a
few models andplans; one for a deluge, another for an earthquake (when
Amyntor defies the Proconsul)—fine situation—and I have such an
idea for a speech for Amyntor in this scene, the spirit of which I am
sure you, with your poetic fire, will seize at once, and will make a
great thing of it. Oddly enough I had a similar subject in my head
for a play, and had had some sketches made, and had written a few
scenes, which I was about to show to {the name is almost illegible,
but the remaining letters are apparently lH* rm* *"), when
fortunately your letter and MS. arrived.
You know with whom I much infinitely prefer to collaborate—I
think. Come and see me before I quit England and have half-an-
hour s chat—indeed five minutes where kindred spirits meet will
settle it,—and then we will astonish the public!
Tours enthusiastically, W * * * * *
{The rest of the signature is lost.)
vm.
My Evee Deaeest Mamma,
I feel the time is come for telling you the rele truth about
this scool. I am sory to say it is not nearly such a nice place as it
looked when you came to see it, hut you must not be unhappy about
that. I am trying hard to be brave and chearf ul. Now I will tell
you about the life here. My form-master means to be kind, I am
shore; but he is hasty, and throws books at. the boys, and, if he
misses a boy, he canes him. But I have not been caned yet—not by
him. The Head Master caned me because I would say my diktasion
the way you taught me. But I do not mind, my dere mother, and
my whales are almost well. There is rather a nice boy sits next to
me. He says he has supressed his measels for a fortnight, and is
afraid he can't keep them in much longer. The other boys are very
well, except two in bed in my dormitory with a kind of rash, which
the matron says is only tifoid. German and French measels have
been very popular, and a man with crape round his hat calls every
morning with the other tradesmen for orders, whichlooks funnyatfirst.
J. here are a good many bulleys among the big boys—one boxed
my ears with a cricket-bat last week, though I am beginning to
hear with my left if you shout down it; and then, as Uncle Bob
stv, ^° ^e knoked about, but it is not pleasant at first.
. eight before last we had a burglar break in. He fired his
pistie at a boy who bared his progress, but he did not take my life,
only my toy yat, and the cake Aunt Matilda gave me; so I ought
to be a grateful boy.
th me °^ ^e ys thought the hedmaster might have done more
j an ororl under his bed while the burglar was here; but you know,
ere mother, he could not help being atacked by pannic; and, after
TlT6 ^ ^s own b°ys' onty borders.
biffffV3 a g00a- dea* °* drinking going on in the bedrooms by the
boys; but praps, as they say, it is only water, which it
certainly risembles a little.
wi+b wunder if the holidays ever will come, and my hed akes
,T 80 HHioh studdy, and I feel very languid when I go to bed and
thouS?T to sleaP- StiU 1 iope * sllaL1 servive one term of it,
lona-pr promise 1 will write the moment I feel I oan bear it no
s r" Tour afectionat Son,
Tommy Washtnoton Eaencake.
P-S. Plese don't alude to anything in this, if you write here.
{Strictly Private.) Madame will not sing for less than £800. If,
however, in addition to engagement, you could guarantee her a
show for the pair of them before Royalty (State Concert preferred),
I dare say I could arrange for a reduction, of which half could be
taken in unnumbered tickets, gallery and amphitheatre. (Address
as usual.)
x.
My Deaeest Alice, South Audley Street, July 7.
I scaecely breathe, I dare not move,—this dreadful heat!
Think of my devotion in writing to you! "We have had a terrible
week. I had, of course, to take Maude to Lord's. Nearly every one
in white, very few people one knew. The young men grow more and
more ill-bred. A friend of Reginald's nearly laughed when I asked
him why the Cambridge men run after the Oxford men's knocks,—I
would let them ran after their own knocks. I think the Australians
won. Talking of Australians, I never saw anyone like Maeia. You
know Reginald found her and married her at Melbourne, and she is
being trotted round before the family, for inspection. She takes it
very calmly. She admires nothing. Westminster Abbey, reminds
her a little of the Rev. Mr. Gilkes s tabernacle at Boonoorung. Of
course, she needs everything, but I oan do nothing with her. I took
her to Felise's, and Madame Styley's—she said she saw she would
have to write out to Melbourne for what she needed! Can one be
more Colonial? However, I have done my duty. Oh, these
Elections! Nothing but Politics. When will people be rational
again ! Ever yours, dearest Alice,
Caroline Beancepath.
(To be continued.)
BUCKINGHAM PALACE r. ALBERT PALACE.
It was unfortunate that H.R.H. should have selected last Friday
for a State Ball at Buckingham Palace, as on that same night,
Mr. William Holland, the People's Caterer, was giving an " Aris-
tocratic Fete" at the Albert Palace, Battersea Park, which must
have robbed the Royal saloons of many of their most distinguished
ornaments. The privilege of admission to the Albert Palace was,
as placarded at the door, "for cash only," and this announcement
may have caused some of the leading members of the aristocracy
to turn back and seek the less exclusive hospitality of Buckingham
Palace, where anyone could get in merely for the asking. But those
who were fortunate enough to possess the necessary silver vouchers
spent a really very happy evening in shooting for nuts, taking light
refreshments, listening to the singing in the Cafe Chantant,
applauding William the Caterer's speech, and witnessing the comical
fireworks. The Aristocratic Feters, having evidently ordered their
carriages much later than was necessary, were for the most part
compelled to " step it" all the way home, the supply of cabs being
very limited, or perhaps the coachmen had made a mistake between
the two palaces, as there were a considerable number of aristocratic
equipages waiting in St. James's Park. Next Season two such great
events must not happen on the same evening.
Me. Gladstone's next Teanslation.—From Home Rule to the
Rules of Homee.