DOI Page / Citation link:
https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.17660#0322
Note: This is an additional scan to display the colour reference chart and scalebar.
0.5
1 cm
December 8, 1888.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
267
Now, if you by chance seem short of
cash?
Keep in de middle ob de road !
Don't tax de people heavily, or soon
you '11 go to smash.
Keep in de middle ob de road !
But, if dey hear you a-singing too
small,
Dey 're sure to say you are gwine to
fall,
And do not know your business, and
are no good at all.
Keep in de middle ob de road !
Chorus.
Don't be too fast at cramming, you '11
find that is no go,
Keep in de middle ob de road!
But little chance you '11 stand if you
make the pace too slow.
Keep in de middle ob de road!
London will not care for a Board
dat 's all awry;
Den show you are tolerant, as well as
smart and spry.
She '11 chuck you, if to imitate the
bad Old Ring you try.
Keep in de middle ob de road!
Chorus.
You corner-men, don't kick up too
much shindy left and right,
Keep in de middle ob de road !
And, Mr. (Diggle) Johnson, do not
hold de reins too tight,
Keep in de middle ob de road !
Or de trap may capsize, and de wheels
be in de air.
Don't show sectarian temper, or tear
agnostic hair,
For you are not put dere ober trifles
for to swear.
Keep in de middle ob de road !
Chorus.
Den, Minstrels, keep in de middle ob
de road!
You will bless de rising race
If you go a steady pace,
And keep in de middle ob de road!
THINGS ONE WOULD RATHER HAVE LEFT UNSAID.
Miss Margaret. " Pray sit down. I'm so sokry Mamma and my Sisters abb out !"
Shy Curate (who has called on Parish business). "Oh, prat don't mention it. Oxs of the
Family is quits enough !''
THE REAL CRIEVANGE OFFICE,
(Before Lord Commissioner Punch.)
An Efficient Volunteer introduced.
Commissioner. Well, Sir, what
can I do for you ?
Efficient Volunteer (saluting).
Assist me to get a satisfactory sub-
stitute for "Wimbledon.
Com. Surely you are in good hands.
I read in the papers this week there
is to be a meeting of representatives
of the National Rifle Association to
consider what is best to be done.
Eff. Vol. Not the first by many,
my Lord. Meetings are always being
held with the same object in view.
Com. Do you suggest that these
meetings are useless ?
Eff. Vol. Certainly, as two parties
are pulling one against the other.
Com. How comes it there should
be such an unfortunate situation ?
Eff. Vol. I suppose, my Lord,
because one party thinks more of
soldiering than five-o'clock tea and
picnics.
Coto. Would you suggest that
Wimbledon was used for either
purpose ?
Eff. Vol. I would. The Cottage
was the rendezvous of the creme de
la creme of Society—very good people
in their way, but not likely to pro-
duce a Queen's Medallist.
Com. And you think < = leeps the question of a new
site an open one ? ri. IF A
Eff. Vol. I do. The ] = co mge on the lawn and eat
iees are not likely to be si =r-^ 1 beyond striking distance
of town. _ No doubt some i = ^V/Sv^ s, but only at considerable
inconvenience. — _. rSI\T^
Com. Then what woulc L
Eff. Vol. That the V =—
VEHE and Lord Manikin =. ffl
want is a place where busi: -
Com. How would Aide — "~ <»
Eff. Vol. Admirably; = j_, a
excellent sites. "What we —
Com. I will see that yo :
CO
Last Friday Mr. Band: _
undertook to continue his —
United Kingdom. If this = co ^
might be deprived, as for e = ^—;
Mr. Ihving appeared I =_
the Drama in any part of t — C 5
Mrs. Kendal undertook f\ 2
Great Britain and Ireland. = ^ &
Mr. Toole appeared bei E. t J
and asked who he was), t—
again to play in Ici on Par =—
Mr. W. F. Hawtrey pi = ^>
Mr. Tekeiss undertook^- (J) c
the Provinces, after the ter —in v d
Mr. Forbes Robertson = £
blank verse. — M) O
Mr. Charles Coixette ET
Miss Grace Hawthorn = ■» y
diction of the Supreme Cou = OQ
Mr. Wilson Baerett i=L
m any part of the United 1= 1— c
_n —» to
£- _J >
Old Style Modernise: = r\ °
stand, "Exchange— no Rol -
ments every day. If the |=_w /-s
new form of the old " Chop = w
-1 o .
= E
considered, and Lady De
their company. What we
)ur attention.
ling a number of equally
mt further shillyshallying,
.pliance.
■ his Lordship, and retired.
EL
;he Chancery Division, and
yll and Mr. Hyde in the
ts the theatre-going public
ot to make a speech about
he audience in any part of
1 of the eminent Comedian,
V more stories, and never
issical burlesque.
ritish Sailor, in London or
him from ever playing in
a the United Kingdom.
Matinees within trie juris-
pledge not to play again
. Motto over the umbrella
3 salutations and compli-
lub " is apparently only a
267
Now, if you by chance seem short of
cash?
Keep in de middle ob de road !
Don't tax de people heavily, or soon
you '11 go to smash.
Keep in de middle ob de road !
But, if dey hear you a-singing too
small,
Dey 're sure to say you are gwine to
fall,
And do not know your business, and
are no good at all.
Keep in de middle ob de road !
Chorus.
Don't be too fast at cramming, you '11
find that is no go,
Keep in de middle ob de road!
But little chance you '11 stand if you
make the pace too slow.
Keep in de middle ob de road!
London will not care for a Board
dat 's all awry;
Den show you are tolerant, as well as
smart and spry.
She '11 chuck you, if to imitate the
bad Old Ring you try.
Keep in de middle ob de road!
Chorus.
You corner-men, don't kick up too
much shindy left and right,
Keep in de middle ob de road !
And, Mr. (Diggle) Johnson, do not
hold de reins too tight,
Keep in de middle ob de road !
Or de trap may capsize, and de wheels
be in de air.
Don't show sectarian temper, or tear
agnostic hair,
For you are not put dere ober trifles
for to swear.
Keep in de middle ob de road !
Chorus.
Den, Minstrels, keep in de middle ob
de road!
You will bless de rising race
If you go a steady pace,
And keep in de middle ob de road!
THINGS ONE WOULD RATHER HAVE LEFT UNSAID.
Miss Margaret. " Pray sit down. I'm so sokry Mamma and my Sisters abb out !"
Shy Curate (who has called on Parish business). "Oh, prat don't mention it. Oxs of the
Family is quits enough !''
THE REAL CRIEVANGE OFFICE,
(Before Lord Commissioner Punch.)
An Efficient Volunteer introduced.
Commissioner. Well, Sir, what
can I do for you ?
Efficient Volunteer (saluting).
Assist me to get a satisfactory sub-
stitute for "Wimbledon.
Com. Surely you are in good hands.
I read in the papers this week there
is to be a meeting of representatives
of the National Rifle Association to
consider what is best to be done.
Eff. Vol. Not the first by many,
my Lord. Meetings are always being
held with the same object in view.
Com. Do you suggest that these
meetings are useless ?
Eff. Vol. Certainly, as two parties
are pulling one against the other.
Com. How comes it there should
be such an unfortunate situation ?
Eff. Vol. I suppose, my Lord,
because one party thinks more of
soldiering than five-o'clock tea and
picnics.
Coto. Would you suggest that
Wimbledon was used for either
purpose ?
Eff. Vol. I would. The Cottage
was the rendezvous of the creme de
la creme of Society—very good people
in their way, but not likely to pro-
duce a Queen's Medallist.
Com. And you think < = leeps the question of a new
site an open one ? ri. IF A
Eff. Vol. I do. The ] = co mge on the lawn and eat
iees are not likely to be si =r-^ 1 beyond striking distance
of town. _ No doubt some i = ^V/Sv^ s, but only at considerable
inconvenience. — _. rSI\T^
Com. Then what woulc L
Eff. Vol. That the V =—
VEHE and Lord Manikin =. ffl
want is a place where busi: -
Com. How would Aide — "~ <»
Eff. Vol. Admirably; = j_, a
excellent sites. "What we —
Com. I will see that yo :
CO
Last Friday Mr. Band: _
undertook to continue his —
United Kingdom. If this = co ^
might be deprived, as for e = ^—;
Mr. Ihving appeared I =_
the Drama in any part of t — C 5
Mrs. Kendal undertook f\ 2
Great Britain and Ireland. = ^ &
Mr. Toole appeared bei E. t J
and asked who he was), t—
again to play in Ici on Par =—
Mr. W. F. Hawtrey pi = ^>
Mr. Tekeiss undertook^- (J) c
the Provinces, after the ter —in v d
Mr. Forbes Robertson = £
blank verse. — M) O
Mr. Charles Coixette ET
Miss Grace Hawthorn = ■» y
diction of the Supreme Cou = OQ
Mr. Wilson Baerett i=L
m any part of the United 1= 1— c
_n —» to
£- _J >
Old Style Modernise: = r\ °
stand, "Exchange— no Rol -
ments every day. If the |=_w /-s
new form of the old " Chop = w
-1 o .
= E
considered, and Lady De
their company. What we
)ur attention.
ling a number of equally
mt further shillyshallying,
.pliance.
■ his Lordship, and retired.
EL
;he Chancery Division, and
yll and Mr. Hyde in the
ts the theatre-going public
ot to make a speech about
he audience in any part of
1 of the eminent Comedian,
V more stories, and never
issical burlesque.
ritish Sailor, in London or
him from ever playing in
a the United Kingdom.
Matinees within trie juris-
pledge not to play again
. Motto over the umbrella
3 salutations and compli-
lub " is apparently only a