DOI Heft:
October 29, 1892
DOI Seite / Zitierlink: https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.17694#0206
October 29, 1892.]
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
201
THE BATTLE OE THE BAEDS;
Or, The Lists for the Laurels.
Fytte the Second.
" Wire in, my warblers! " Punchius cried.
"To 'wire,'
Though slangy, sounds appropriate to the
Lyre."
Then forth there toddled with the mincing
gait
Of some fair "Tottering Lily," him, the
great
New Bard of Buddha!
Grave, and grey of
crest.
"Lis he illumes the nubi-
bustic West
With the true "Light of
Asia,"—or, at least,
Such simulacrum of the
effulgent East
As shineth from a home-
made Chinese lantern.
No Hapiz he, or Saadi, yet
he can turn
Authentic Sanscrit to—
Telegraphese,
And make the Muse a
moon-faced Japanese.
Leaderesque love of gentle
gush and " Caps.,"
Is blent in him with fond-
ness for the Japs.
"Wah! wah! futtee!—
wah!_ wah, gooroo!"
he cried,
And twanged his tinkling
orient lyre with pride.
THE MOANING OF
THE BARDS.
No moaning of the bards !
A pleasant quip!
No manufactured gloom
to dim that far light!
Of dirge's luxury deprive
my lip ?
So suns might say there
shall be no more
starlight!
Lamping is not required at
day's full noon,
Lanterns are out of
place in dawn's fair
Bush-light;
But when dark night sets
in, and there's no
moon,
There is a chance for
stars, or even a rush-
light.
No moaning of the bards ?
That were hard lines
For minor line-spinners,
imperial Tennyson !
Owls only have their
chance when day declines,
That's why the night-birds crown thee
with prompt benison.
Lewis has wailed and warbled—twiddlingly •
Alfred has—rootley-tootlely—wailed and
warbled;
William's young Muse hath wept—then why
not Me,
Whose brow, not less than theirs, with
woe is marbled ?
Robert and Austin (Dobson) took their
turns;
There is some talk, too, of Sir Theodore
Martin.
Seeing my lips, too, thrill, my heart, too,
burns, [part in!
Why the great contest should I take no
May be I do not carry guns enough
To epically glorify King Arthur,
But I have penned some reams of rhythmic
stuff
Concerning (please admire the rhyme!)
Siddartha.
(That, as an " assonance," is quite as
good
As "sang it," and "began it." Orna-
mental
And Eastern Mythos draws me; but I'm
good
At Poems National and Non-Oriental."
Knocks her nice little flat nose on the floor,
In Japanese politeness, my " Half Jewel."
Algernon's nymphs, in song or in amour
Are always coarse and generally cruel.
" Pearls of the"Faith," is a most pious work,
Although Al-Mutahali is the stringer.
But only he who hates "The Unspeakable
Turk,"
On that account would blame the Christian
singer!
"Lotus and Jewel!" Doesn't that sound
nice ?
My mild Jap Muse may
be a roguey-poguey;
But^there 's no stimulus to
pleasant vice
About a holy Brahman
or chaste Yogi.
" Land of the Rising Sun,"
delightful" Third
Kingdom of Merry
Dreams," of you I'm
amorous.
Must that exclude me
from the Wreath P
Absurd!
I'm prettily pious, and
I'm gently glamorous.
My Knighthood proves that
I am quite O.K.,
My dear T>. T. will
answer for my morals ;
I'm steeped in Sanscrit
lore, and so must say
I can't see why I should
not wear the laurels I
"Quite so," said Punch.
" I like your rhyme—
and cheek;
Still, there be others yet
to hear—next week! "
ILL-DIGESTED LESSON.
The Governess. "And now, what is a Parable, Effie ?"
Ejfe {who has got rather muddled). "A Parable? Oh, of course, a Parable
is a Heavenly Story with an Earthly Meaning !"
I love the Hindoos, I adore the Japs ;
I'm fond of scraps of Oriental lingo;
Tet I'm a patriot, and have hymned,
perhaps,
As much as most, my native god, great
Jingo!
I think a Muse with twinkly almond orbs,
Would—as a change—in England prove
most f etohing;
Is it not plain Jap Art our Art absorbs!
Why not in singing, then, as well as
sketching ?
I'm sure my " Geisha " is as good a girl
As Vivien, or Faustine, or e'en Dolores.
Is she more frail, less fair, that perfect pearl
Of Singing Girls, Xipangu's great'st of
glories ?
Apologia Arrygaten-
sis. — "'Arry in 'Arry-
gate " was so much sought
after everywhere that it
was thought Mr. Punch
could not possibly supply
the great demand for this
article with sufficient cele-
rity and dispatch. Hence
it happened that the Har-
rogate Advertiser enthusi-
astically reproduced the
entire article as published
in Mr. Punch's pages,
without saying "with your
leave, or by your leave," to
the Proprietors represent-
ing Mr. Punch. So, Mr.
Punch, always kindly and
courteous, was compelled
in this instance to " know
the reason why." Where-
upon The Harrogate Ad-
vertiser acknowledged that it did not
"harrogate to itself " any sort of right to
republish wholesale without acknowledgment
anything that has appeared in Mr. Punch's
pages, and at once handsomely apologised for
this instance of priggishness quite unprece-
dented in the Harrogate Advertiser's columns
(Vide Harrogate Advertiser, October 15).
Pox and Cox are satisfied. Causa finita est.
Vive 'Arry! Likewise 'Arrygate! And,
know, all men, by these presents, that Mr.
P. is quite wide-awake.
Anecdotage.—Said the Old Parliamentary
Hand, entering Christ Church, " I prefer this
House to the other!" It was the success of
the visit.
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
201
THE BATTLE OE THE BAEDS;
Or, The Lists for the Laurels.
Fytte the Second.
" Wire in, my warblers! " Punchius cried.
"To 'wire,'
Though slangy, sounds appropriate to the
Lyre."
Then forth there toddled with the mincing
gait
Of some fair "Tottering Lily," him, the
great
New Bard of Buddha!
Grave, and grey of
crest.
"Lis he illumes the nubi-
bustic West
With the true "Light of
Asia,"—or, at least,
Such simulacrum of the
effulgent East
As shineth from a home-
made Chinese lantern.
No Hapiz he, or Saadi, yet
he can turn
Authentic Sanscrit to—
Telegraphese,
And make the Muse a
moon-faced Japanese.
Leaderesque love of gentle
gush and " Caps.,"
Is blent in him with fond-
ness for the Japs.
"Wah! wah! futtee!—
wah!_ wah, gooroo!"
he cried,
And twanged his tinkling
orient lyre with pride.
THE MOANING OF
THE BARDS.
No moaning of the bards !
A pleasant quip!
No manufactured gloom
to dim that far light!
Of dirge's luxury deprive
my lip ?
So suns might say there
shall be no more
starlight!
Lamping is not required at
day's full noon,
Lanterns are out of
place in dawn's fair
Bush-light;
But when dark night sets
in, and there's no
moon,
There is a chance for
stars, or even a rush-
light.
No moaning of the bards ?
That were hard lines
For minor line-spinners,
imperial Tennyson !
Owls only have their
chance when day declines,
That's why the night-birds crown thee
with prompt benison.
Lewis has wailed and warbled—twiddlingly •
Alfred has—rootley-tootlely—wailed and
warbled;
William's young Muse hath wept—then why
not Me,
Whose brow, not less than theirs, with
woe is marbled ?
Robert and Austin (Dobson) took their
turns;
There is some talk, too, of Sir Theodore
Martin.
Seeing my lips, too, thrill, my heart, too,
burns, [part in!
Why the great contest should I take no
May be I do not carry guns enough
To epically glorify King Arthur,
But I have penned some reams of rhythmic
stuff
Concerning (please admire the rhyme!)
Siddartha.
(That, as an " assonance," is quite as
good
As "sang it," and "began it." Orna-
mental
And Eastern Mythos draws me; but I'm
good
At Poems National and Non-Oriental."
Knocks her nice little flat nose on the floor,
In Japanese politeness, my " Half Jewel."
Algernon's nymphs, in song or in amour
Are always coarse and generally cruel.
" Pearls of the"Faith," is a most pious work,
Although Al-Mutahali is the stringer.
But only he who hates "The Unspeakable
Turk,"
On that account would blame the Christian
singer!
"Lotus and Jewel!" Doesn't that sound
nice ?
My mild Jap Muse may
be a roguey-poguey;
But^there 's no stimulus to
pleasant vice
About a holy Brahman
or chaste Yogi.
" Land of the Rising Sun,"
delightful" Third
Kingdom of Merry
Dreams," of you I'm
amorous.
Must that exclude me
from the Wreath P
Absurd!
I'm prettily pious, and
I'm gently glamorous.
My Knighthood proves that
I am quite O.K.,
My dear T>. T. will
answer for my morals ;
I'm steeped in Sanscrit
lore, and so must say
I can't see why I should
not wear the laurels I
"Quite so," said Punch.
" I like your rhyme—
and cheek;
Still, there be others yet
to hear—next week! "
ILL-DIGESTED LESSON.
The Governess. "And now, what is a Parable, Effie ?"
Ejfe {who has got rather muddled). "A Parable? Oh, of course, a Parable
is a Heavenly Story with an Earthly Meaning !"
I love the Hindoos, I adore the Japs ;
I'm fond of scraps of Oriental lingo;
Tet I'm a patriot, and have hymned,
perhaps,
As much as most, my native god, great
Jingo!
I think a Muse with twinkly almond orbs,
Would—as a change—in England prove
most f etohing;
Is it not plain Jap Art our Art absorbs!
Why not in singing, then, as well as
sketching ?
I'm sure my " Geisha " is as good a girl
As Vivien, or Faustine, or e'en Dolores.
Is she more frail, less fair, that perfect pearl
Of Singing Girls, Xipangu's great'st of
glories ?
Apologia Arrygaten-
sis. — "'Arry in 'Arry-
gate " was so much sought
after everywhere that it
was thought Mr. Punch
could not possibly supply
the great demand for this
article with sufficient cele-
rity and dispatch. Hence
it happened that the Har-
rogate Advertiser enthusi-
astically reproduced the
entire article as published
in Mr. Punch's pages,
without saying "with your
leave, or by your leave," to
the Proprietors represent-
ing Mr. Punch. So, Mr.
Punch, always kindly and
courteous, was compelled
in this instance to " know
the reason why." Where-
upon The Harrogate Ad-
vertiser acknowledged that it did not
"harrogate to itself " any sort of right to
republish wholesale without acknowledgment
anything that has appeared in Mr. Punch's
pages, and at once handsomely apologised for
this instance of priggishness quite unprece-
dented in the Harrogate Advertiser's columns
(Vide Harrogate Advertiser, October 15).
Pox and Cox are satisfied. Causa finita est.
Vive 'Arry! Likewise 'Arrygate! And,
know, all men, by these presents, that Mr.
P. is quite wide-awake.
Anecdotage.—Said the Old Parliamentary
Hand, entering Christ Church, " I prefer this
House to the other!" It was the success of
the visit.