Punch (103.1892)

274 PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. [December 10, 1892.

THE NEXT ELECTION PIC-NIC.

(By Our Own Prophetic Reporter.)

gence by asking them if they understood Spanish. Of course, they
did. [Loud laughter.) He was quite sure that the Signora's third
verse and accompanying dance must have convinced everyone of

A few days since a " Grand Intellectual Fete " was given by the the advantages of Fair Trade. {Laughter.) He saw no reason
Flower League in advancement of the Patriotic Cause, in the grounds i for merriment. {Renewed laughter.) He had now come to that
of the Duke of Ditchwater. The Railway Companies afforded important subject Bi-metallism. {Cheers.) They had been told
unusual facilities for securing a large gathering, and there was that wbereas speech was silver, silence was golden. ("Hear, hear/")
much enthusiasm amongst those who were present. To meet the : To show the advantage of silver (represented by speftch), the Blue

requirements of decisions arrived at during the trial of recent
Election Petitions, it was arranged that some one competent to
undertake the task should introduce and explain the various dis-
tractions afforded for the entertainment of tbe very numerous com- I characteristic ditties
pany. Mr. A. Briefless,
Junior, Barrister, of Lon-
don, kindly consented to
act as lecturer, his profes-
sional engagements fortu-
nately allowing him leisure
to assume such a respon-
sibility.

The Lecturer said that
he was delighted to see so
large a gathering. {Cheers.)
They quite reminded him
of the clients who thronged
his passage on the first day
of Term, waiting for his
chamber - doors to open.
{Laughter.) There was
nothing in the remark he
had just made to provoke
merriment. He wished it
to be clearly understood
that he appealed to their
reason. {Cheers.) It had
been objected that some of
the entertainments given
at what had been called
political pic - nics had
nothing to do with the
reasoning faculties of the
spectators. This he em-
phatically denied. (Ap-
plause.) Without wasting
further of their time—
{"No, no!" " Goon!")—
he would come to his first
illustration—the Bounding
Brothers of Bohemia.
{Great cheering.) It was
advisable that the bodies
as well as the minds of
children educated by the
School-Boards should re-
ceive attention. Their
bodies should be brought
to as near perfection as
possible ; every muscle
should be brought into
play. To explain his
meaning, he called upon
the Bounding Brothers of
Bohemia to illustrate the
poetry of motion.

Upon this, five gentlemen
in tights (understood to
be the athletic kindred to
whom the Lecturer had
referred) performed a series
of feats of strength, which
included standing on one
another's heads, jumping

eyed Nigger would give a native song accompanied on his own
banjo. (Loud applause.)
The Blue-eyed Nigger then favoured the company with one of his

MILITARY EDUCATION.

General. "Mr. de Bridoon, what is the general use op Cavalry in

modern warfare ? "

Mr. de Bridoon. "Well, I stjpfose to give Tone to what would other-
wise be a mere yulgar brawl ! "

The Lecturer said he had
now to thank his audience
for their kind attention,
and to inform them that
the display of fireworks
with set-pieces containing
political sentiments ap-
pealing to their reason,
would take place imme-
diately.

Shortly afterwards the
company separated, greatly
pleased with the rational
entertainment they had
been invited to enjoy.

through hoops, and turning quadruple somersaults.
After their performances were over Mr. Briefless resumed.
The Lecturer said: He next wished to appeal to their reason—to

ADAPTED FROM
THE FRENCH.

{Being a Parisian Parlia-
mentary Procedure as
'' She Might be Spoke in
England")

Scene — The House of
Commons at question-
time. Ministers in at-
tendance, excited Mem-
bers regarding them
with derision.

First Member. I claim
the word, Mr. Speaker. I
would ask Esquire Har-
court, does he propose to
make his Budget popular ?
[" Very well! very well!"
from the Conservatives.

Esquire Harcourt. I tell
the Hon. Gentleman that
by such a question he in-
sults the world! (Cheers.)
Nay, he insults England!
[Loud applause, in which
all join.

First Mem. (after a
pause). Still, you have not
answered my question. Is
your Budget to be popular ?

[Murmurs.
Esquire Har. (with
spirit). I consider such a
question twice repeated an
infamy!

[Enthusiastic cheering.
Second Mem. Then it is
you who are infamous !

[ Uproar.
The Speaker. Gentle-
men, Ministers, do not

force me to put on my hat—do not cause me to suspend the sitting.
First Mem. Surely a civil question deserves a civil answer ?
Esquire Harcourt. Not in a nation that has bled on the field of

challenge, so to speak, their senses on the power of foreign opinion. \ battle. [Roars of applause.

It was asserted that an Englishman cared only for his native land and
the Press appertaining thereto. Now he (the Lecturer) had the
greatest respect for the English Press—(cheers)—still he found that
some of our foreign contemporaries were nearly as good. (" Hear,
hear !") He wished to introduce the Signora Mantilla from Spain
—(applause)—who had consented to sing a political song in Spanish,
emphasizing her opinions by a dance after each verse. (Great cheering.)
The Signora Mantilla then gave a demonstration, which was
much appreciated.
The Lecturer resumed. He said he had not insulted their intelli-

First Mem. (after a pause). And yet what 1 required to know
was reasonable. I wished to know whether Esquire Harcourt
proposed to name a popular Budget ?

Esquire Harcourt. He repeats the calumny! [ Uproar.

First Mem. (after a pause). But is there no reply ? I would ask
Sir Gladstone—is there no reply ?

Sir Gladstone (springing to his feet). It is for the honour of
England! (Immenseenthusiasm.) And now, Sir, you are answered !
[Roars of applause. Scene closes in upon Ministers receiving
the hand-shakes of supporters and opponents.