Punch / Almanack (1844)

THE MARINE LODGING-HOUSE OGRES, WHO LIVE ON THEIR LODGERS.

toOMTH

ll-Y REMARKS.

t,v the V>„

> (
funter

^ ".ehn!^ heat 0f the

3trnter's tefrJtmehinZ heauty "at

(j.^^erry-i^^ s,hlno herself with a

vOQ.

lce, how"

gratifying to the

• are \\p '"lnfl! How stronsly,
SmPle I eillPted to follow her

h,°Wtl l;a '. the °'lour of
'Ural 1 ■* •
their

ren*ind8

pient

• the newly

labojJ 'Cllnd are the agricul-
toil. as they carol amid
he aspect of nature
J °ur own when the |
ot the tonsor

scvh^ its asn' •t"e tonsor has re-
Itf; ^e iatu"'ef; The razor '?

lelofi 11C lu/iUr 1S

*ehn Pleasin ler the morn'nSr dew.

h'ook-S an|lin0(rbel,0ld the ,ittIe
°r gudgeon

in the purling
and tittle-hat.

But that child may live to discount
bills ; and who knows whom, and how
many, he may hook in after years ?

Things to be borne in mind in July.

Thai if you have not much nionev,
you should not think of going to
the sea-s:de ; but if you have none
at all you may go to Boulogne, or
to Bath, which place is frequently
recommended.

That if it rain on St. Swithin's-
dav, you may reckon the weather
will be pretty much the same lor a
month after that it \va* before, but
generally fair and dry.

Maxim.

Remember that time is money :
but that it docs not follow a man i.»
a capitalist who has a great quan-
tity of it'on his hands.

Domestic Economy.—A Saddle
of Mutton contains the reins ami
many sood bits.

- «—* Liiuu-uuL. | many

Ida"'?, the If ASTRONOMICAL.

atij : "efne-Bay Postman, appears in conjunction with his high-
lit"16 '"an ec',|>®ed by that great star, the One Policeman, who cuts a
3 dl»ffcl drew ^a'r °f bluchers. —The eccentric comet, Furley, reduces
essing gown to a shooting-jacket, and appears without a tail,
t; j' trirn v ^ortJcu^ural Directions for the Gardens at Tivoli,

Vour jv, larap». water your Lake, graft new noses on statues, >i
°ney-taker, and if the season be severe, cut your sticks. £-

4

P

iGi

S"',.F- Tomiiks, the Compiler ot tiie Statutes at I.atk-.e, b. 1841. A Rood style

book tor a gammon board, the Statutes in such a shape being wholly binding.
Ta« ^bntknck of Death on the wretch Francis, poh k.iking off a fistol at
«ku Ma.; kstv, is commuted to Tuanspoutation poll life, 1S4-. Cillecn shoot-
"ik ends.

* hk King of Hanover dtnes in the Hall of the Inner Temple,

1843 ; being possibly the Feast of the elder St. Nicholas.

Ghand Salk of Cigars of the Duke of Sussex, 1843. The
Duke's virtues now in every apprentice's mouth.

»k Pope proposes to Revive the Ancient Custom op Cbowning j"™* Cafi-
1°'' the greatest living Poet, 1843. Mr. Robert Montgomery-sends m a i «peci-
mens " Satan," " Woman," and " Luther." The Pope is equally struck by Satan
io?it ,oman>" hut thinks little of" Luther." . . , .,._j

»i" /eakins distinKuishins himself at the Convention, is solicited to stand as salaried
M. P. for Westminster, l)j"a deputation of " householders," consist,,,* ol an eminent
chartist attic, a liberal second-floor back, and a staunch independent parlour. Jen-
Kiiis^vill sleep upon it.

.Sfcunbap after ® until).

, OVINCIAt, pXpUR SAYS, "IllEI.AND "*NEVER YET GAVE PROMISE OP A LARGER

J^ueat-crop." 18-12. Great news for O'Connell, who always looks for a *ood
harvest from the long ears.

The Bourbons restored, 1815. Louis XVIII. feels that he is
1'itnself again, after a very disagreeable IVtip.

0 bv r,a,t;1 'wuoduc.B at Court, IKM-and learnt nomanner!' judge

by the bad language be indulged in oil his late appearance at the Ua> market.

Gȣd Cricket Match at Lord's, Kent r. Ai.l England, 1842. All England
^.<-ts two out of Beds, whilst her lluchs is all the worse toi Herts.

^L^ins persuades the staunch and independent P^—L^e^l'X
cock) to devote his savings of the New River and bis youth, to purchase an annuity
the Managing Director of the West Diddlesex.

ho;°"a '« Queen's Bench oi.uc.En to leave at S'X oJclock. ISK. Beds,
however, may be obtained through Messrs. Levy, Thompson, and Uavis.

6 Sv

after ®rtnttp.

U)!\('!kncu ^'°"ht convicts Madame Laffahge, 1840—and adds
1 I'er cent, to the value of her wardrobe and chattels.

RA.RKHlt BEA

desirous' uf'p^suVumouVhmio^r.l'eTeclsamoVum^U in the shape of a ymn?.

Piccadilly, 1s-i2. The gentleman, being

putting establishments for the sale of rickety tables, crazy
emirs, and equivocal bedding. The Lord Mayor, in the course
of a discussion on the price to be given for a four-post, offered
to sleep on a "scissars,"or to takeanybed that might turn up.

MONTHLY REMARKS.

Zoological.

The jovial Jackdaw, by whom the
fields are given up, now seeks the downs
in search of food. The sprightly Hyiena
at the Surrey Zoological Gardens enjoys
his annual laugh at the expense of the
visiters.

Stage-coach Duties.

Under the Assessed Taxes, these
duties have now become nearly obso-
lete, in consequence of the railways.
Their principal duties consist:—In
stopping at various public-houses
for the refection of the coachman,
for indefinite periods. Jn driving
off before the passengers have
swallowed three mcutl.fuls of a

2 Goes
2 Gills
2 Larks
2 Riot..4

2 Drams
4 (iocs
"2 Hemlac
a Lectures

three shilling dinner. In making
the fees of coachmcn, guards,
porters, and hangers-on equal
the fare as near as possible. In
going the same distance in three
hours for live shillings, that the
railway does in forty minutes for
half-a-crown.

Income-tax.

If you do not like to pay this
impost, allow your wife the pri-
vilege ol signing cheques, and
the very next year you will be
relieved of the tax.

TAVERN MEASURE
make 1 Gill.

44 1 Lark.

1 Riot.

" 1 Cell, or Stationhousc.

N.B.—A cell is equivalent to Ss,

For Office Clerkx—as followsv

make 1 Go.

1 Headache.
" I Lecture. •

The Sack.


18,'il. On the strength of
kins asks the Managin
400/. a-year, the Manaj

Mr. Green makes
in the middle of

A Boy, kor accidkntal
Hakdwickk, 1H42. Ti
himself with a cat.

Oshaldistox, " Tiik So
5f> seconds. Tick Ho
Mr. Osbaldiston at the

having Introduced the staunch and independent parlour, Jen-
g Director to quality him for Parliament. As it requires only
ing Director .says " By all means; hut first get elected."

his fikst Nocturnal Ascent, 18'26. He rises
the night, " wishing to he up with the lark."

l.Y DKSTHOYINO a LKVHKKT. IS Kl.dRRKD BY OIIDKR OK loui)

he noble ana gallant lord being deprived of a leveret, regales

iuikk," TUOTTKI) RaTTLKH H-4 MII.ks IN 2 HOURS 13 MINUTES
HSK, INJUR HI) BY TIIK K.YKRTION, l)Mi» THK NKXT DAY, 18^2.

Victoria does Hamlet in less time. Hamlet very much injured.

7 jkuntrng after ^nnfty.

Barcelona bksiegkd, 18-10. The Colonels of Barcelona heiii"

surrounded with shells.

1831. Jenkins waits upon the staunch anil independent parlour to ascertain the salanr
of the paid member for Westminster, rinding it, only 1/. Is. a-week, and gettinir 11 5*
by evening parties, Jenkins again proposes to sleep upon it. 6

Jupiter stationary. Having the rheumatism, ho sends to Jlr.
Coles for a new belt.

RKCTIOtf or THK GrKKNHOUSES AT CllKI.SEA GARnENS, BY TUB \rOTHFCAn I V«'
Company, ITU. For the cultivation of "mixtures a, before," and ibrcinjesj" ilU.

5000 SKAMKN IMPBS8SEU OW THK TlIAMKS FOR TIIK ROYAI. NAVY. I/HS GovernlYi<k>t»
should blush lor such an article appearing in her chronicles, and ou^ht. to stop the premm

A Silver Chajr op State m ad p., in. England kor thk Thronk op tiie Emprk»i«
°F ; l/ed 1A' scourge of the nation," long covered with guilt, is now silter

£buntinp aftrr ^nnt'tij.

The Delaware Indians enter into a Treaty with the Pennsyivaktiv.
uav uovvx the hatchet, 17->7- The Pennsylvanians, in their prm'n'A ,' *"*
their debts, have since thrown it. Fr"unses to

Count de Grasse tried and exiled, 1784. France, wishing to
make havwhilst the stm shines, cuts her Grasse.

site ok i. and OX tiik cai.TON IIi li, gltaxted fob a monuufl. _

mabtybs, 1812. The Men,ik „f the Scotch Martyrs, una'jle to qhtipnta* •co"»
huxlaud, retire to Gallon llill and take a site. tu oljta|a any land u