DOI issue:
Punch’s Almanack for 1851
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.17040#0008
PUSH'S ALfiAflAfiK FOE iftSI.
* JULY.
The corn opens its ears to
the voice of nature, and the
fields in some places put on
a rye face. The early flowers
begin to get seedy, and the
Martin leaves the first cold
Day. Our principal voca-
lists are the sky, the wood,
and other larkish members
of the feathered community.
On the 3rd the dog days
begin, which St. Swithin
celebrates by raining cats
and dogs on the 15th.
a prophetic whisper.
When a Policeman is dis-
covered to visit the kitchen
—then it will be unnecessary
to ask, Where go the legs of
mutton ?
Consolation for the
Corpulent. — A waist of
sufficiently ample circum-
ference is an umbrella to
the lower limbs, and will
keep your feet dry, even
when you are standing
under the most pelting
shower.
The Court Circular of
A noient Britain. — King
Arthur's Round Table.
American Wizard.—Mr.
Barxum has turned the
Swedish Nightingale into
a Goldfinch.
The Furniture of the
SicioRoom.—What relation
is an invalid chair to a
ricketty stool?
The Fact and the Word
for it. — Hopkins. " Just
fancy, 350 tureens of real
turtle at the Lord Mayor's
feast! What do you say to
that?"
Biggs. " Gorge-oiis ! "
THE OPERA.
Box-Keeper. "Stalls 216 and 17. This way, Ma'am; last row, Ma'am. Won't you like a book, Ma'amV
AUGUST.
The corn harvest being
nearly over, Mr. Eisenbero
prepares for his continental
tour.
Turnips may be dressed
in a sheet, after scooping
out the insidp, and placing
a light in the interior.
fallacies op the ■
female faculty.
That a tight corset is the
main-stay of beauty.
That it would, be a sin
against good manners not
to ask every visitor the
stereotyped question," Have
you been to the Opera this
season ? "
That a lady's age is one
of those things which "must
be imagined, but can never
be described."
That a husband has a pe-
culiar pleasure In stopping
to look at every shop he
passes, when his wife takes
him out for " a little walk."
Anecdote of the Aris-
tocracy. — A greengrocer
having, unexpectedly, come
into property, sends for a
tailor, to come and measure
him for a coat-of-arms.
How to tell Chalk
from Cheese.—Endeavour
to make cheese out of
London milk.
Question in Compound
Arithmetic. — If time is
money, money is also time,
of course; then how many
seconds- are there in eight-
eenpence, and how much
time do you spend if you
buy a shilling's-worth of
strawberries ?
' THE PIC-NIC.
Contented Man (loq.) " What a Nice Damp Plage we've secured ; and how very fortunate we aae in the Weather ! It would have beek ..
so provoking for us all to have brought our Umbrellas, and then to have had a Fine Day!! Glass of Wine, Briggs, Eh?"
* JULY.
The corn opens its ears to
the voice of nature, and the
fields in some places put on
a rye face. The early flowers
begin to get seedy, and the
Martin leaves the first cold
Day. Our principal voca-
lists are the sky, the wood,
and other larkish members
of the feathered community.
On the 3rd the dog days
begin, which St. Swithin
celebrates by raining cats
and dogs on the 15th.
a prophetic whisper.
When a Policeman is dis-
covered to visit the kitchen
—then it will be unnecessary
to ask, Where go the legs of
mutton ?
Consolation for the
Corpulent. — A waist of
sufficiently ample circum-
ference is an umbrella to
the lower limbs, and will
keep your feet dry, even
when you are standing
under the most pelting
shower.
The Court Circular of
A noient Britain. — King
Arthur's Round Table.
American Wizard.—Mr.
Barxum has turned the
Swedish Nightingale into
a Goldfinch.
The Furniture of the
SicioRoom.—What relation
is an invalid chair to a
ricketty stool?
The Fact and the Word
for it. — Hopkins. " Just
fancy, 350 tureens of real
turtle at the Lord Mayor's
feast! What do you say to
that?"
Biggs. " Gorge-oiis ! "
THE OPERA.
Box-Keeper. "Stalls 216 and 17. This way, Ma'am; last row, Ma'am. Won't you like a book, Ma'amV
AUGUST.
The corn harvest being
nearly over, Mr. Eisenbero
prepares for his continental
tour.
Turnips may be dressed
in a sheet, after scooping
out the insidp, and placing
a light in the interior.
fallacies op the ■
female faculty.
That a tight corset is the
main-stay of beauty.
That it would, be a sin
against good manners not
to ask every visitor the
stereotyped question," Have
you been to the Opera this
season ? "
That a lady's age is one
of those things which "must
be imagined, but can never
be described."
That a husband has a pe-
culiar pleasure In stopping
to look at every shop he
passes, when his wife takes
him out for " a little walk."
Anecdote of the Aris-
tocracy. — A greengrocer
having, unexpectedly, come
into property, sends for a
tailor, to come and measure
him for a coat-of-arms.
How to tell Chalk
from Cheese.—Endeavour
to make cheese out of
London milk.
Question in Compound
Arithmetic. — If time is
money, money is also time,
of course; then how many
seconds- are there in eight-
eenpence, and how much
time do you spend if you
buy a shilling's-worth of
strawberries ?
' THE PIC-NIC.
Contented Man (loq.) " What a Nice Damp Plage we've secured ; and how very fortunate we aae in the Weather ! It would have beek ..
so provoking for us all to have brought our Umbrellas, and then to have had a Fine Day!! Glass of Wine, Briggs, Eh?"