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Punch / Almanack — 1876

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https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.17128#0016
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December 16, 1875.]

TinPTATJ ^!

Y JXUND— t~ ^'1C annual contest of Aerial Veloci-

—— an the new course from Birmingham

{Being a Leaf out of ^ VZ/lVV 'd rcsultod in :l dc:ld heat between

Foit the instruetioj — rfi^^S Skelter's Tearatoay and Captain

serve some record, of 1 — w Stepper t the race occupying twenty-

chronicle a few of tl_ ree seconds and a half exactly,

occurred in the past t — I m/.—Fancy undress ball and breakfast

ldhall, on the occasion of conferring
the City upon General Fitz-Bis-
dent of Prussia.

nder the provisions of the Act for the
ruelty to Husbands, the Honourable

— O . I on was sentenced to six weeks' exclu-
^—- CD I P°ra, for having dragged her worser

— I i morning calls,
before six o'clock, amEE- ^™ 1 Bay.— Having been unanimously

St. Patrick's = ffi | icrous as well jis honourable office of

keys, had boon three —

08

CO

the Countess of

now

Railway from Holvhl

o 0 1 I his immense Metropolis (which
fast in" honour of th = (DM 1 country from Bedford to Brighton,
London, given by f— "^T I >7 to Southend), Mr. Punch presided
Park, and banquet ii= - O I hich, as usual, was held in the Guild-
Dublin, who return =— V- ^^^^^^^W I uoured by the presence of the Sove-
train to the Mansion-= +-J I > together with the British Governor
All Pooh' Ihn/.— 'Er C~ I'G 0F California, and the Empress
Clubs, and thence wa= K I™ 1 ln Disunited States.
wire from Westmins E-1- 0=0 | '.'/.—Grand review of our Steam Sol-
had been preaching k= /\ £ m ■ 'bury Common, in honour of the visit
thence returned to I— f_J I °rF Australia. Upwards of a mil-
of an omnibus. — | 1 Troops were mustered to march past,

= E

Lady Day.— The 1=—? mi^^^^^^^MMtWWWWmm ' tllc yteam Cavalry was described as

Session by the Sri:aj = ^ | rful. When the Emperor left the

in her Speech that =- f\\ I "Woolwich Babies" (each a thirty

which the House ha= ^ £ w I °Pened fire in a salute, which was

the rights of married =—5 ™ co m I t the Land's End and John o'Groat's

I o

JIES FOE THE YEAR.

The Tailor.

red up to London from the country
. children.

|3 > O . jtained employment in a Vest End

o

ring to the extracts I had made from the journal and
the ledger. My father-in-law angry, but powerless.
Became his partner.

June.—Very busy with legal proceedings against the
less important customers of the firm. Constant com-
munication kept up between our Solicitors and the
official representatives of the Sheriffs of London and
Middlesex.

July.—Enjoyed a tour on the Continent. Travelled
strictly incognito under the nomme.de voyage of " Le
Baron de Smith, Grand Milor' Anglais."

August. — Back to business. Recommenced legal
proceedings, and called in all the debts of the firm,
iiuined the establishment, and divided the profits.
Father-in-law retired to Clapham.

September.—Started business on my own account in
the premises lately occupied by my father-in-law and
myself. Invented the Royal Khiva Overcoat. Got the
garment made by the machine girls for next to nothing,
and advertised it largely. Spent a great part of the
month in shooting over my new preserves in Sussex.

October.—Explained to the important customers of
the late firm that my then partner (my father-in-law)
was responsible for commencing legal proceedings against
any gentleman of higher rank than a baronet. Upon
this, important customers returned to my books by the
score, and unimportant customers (following the lead
of their betters) by the thousand.

November.— Commenced to accommodate my cus-
tomers. Lent money at eighty-five per cent, to those
of them who could give me proper security. Found
this venture even a better thing than the sale of " the
Royal Khiva Overcoat, as advertised."

December.—Financial business flourishing famously.
Half-a-dozen decoys bringing me customers (each with
two good names) daily. Nsthing could he better.
Ended the year by eating my plum-pudding off silver
plate, and marrying my daughter (by my first wife) to
a parson!

A Tree of Woe.—The common Tew {Taxus bac-
cate/), as an ornament of the churchyard, has acquired'

id curried favour with my master's melancholy associations. Ho wonder, considering its

botanical name, Taxus.

Modern Illumination.—February 1. Candlemas.
Haven't candles gone out ? Isn't it time to re-christen

jeeess to the books of the firm, and
her Cook, though pas =r_i? Q ^^^^^^^ facts therefrom.

upon having her owi= /~ e a widower, and married my master's

Russia, and, besides r =. f } ■ the season ?

and culinary perqui— V-/ <d JS I ted to my father-in-law that he was ! Dialectic Wut.— Hoot awa', as the Scotchman said

turtle-soup for suppei —— 2 £ I power. Proved my position by refer- | to the owl.
 
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