Punch / Almanack (1884)

Aspect of the Mu

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Down by the Serpeni
Pound I the Skaterml
Pound him a- wiping
Eyes with his ulster-s
Eyes full of scalding r
Red with much blubb
Red was his nose like)
Deeply I pitied him.

‘•Cheerup, O Skatern
Never say die ! ” says

OlDUillg asiut: Ui I11LLX ™

Holding hi?, hand. I
“ Hark to the Skald

H 3

=- O

HOME. II.

Idy has intimated that Som.eone or other is going to sing a Comic Song.

Brake up the Ice-bound stream—
Twelve-and-six thrown away.
That's what ;s the matter, Sir—
Thaw, he be blowed ! ”

Then, with a wild shriek, he
Upped with his knobby stick.
Smote on the Acme steel,

Smote with a mighty stroke,
Smote it and broke it up
Into small flinderkins,

Banged it and smashed it up
Into smithereens.

Shocked, then I left him there,
Grumbling at Thor!

“ROBERT” AT ’AMPTON COURT.

Having a little time to spare the other day, at Ampton, I looked
in at the Pallace, and inquired of a werry hartistic loking Place-
man how long it wood take me to ave a look at the Picturs, and he
said he thort as how they might be done in about 10 minutes. So
I did ’em. And the result as I cums to is. as Pictur Galleries is
reg’lar staggerers ! I hears sum people, as don’t know no better,
tork about the wickedness of London. Well I wrunders what they'd
say if some o.f the most howdacious of these picturs was put in a shop
winder in Cheapside '. Take Madame Wenus for instance, how she
could ever have gone about without catching friteful bad colds and
atracting the eyes of the Perlice, I can’t understand. There suttenlv
is one thing as I admires in these imperent old Painters, they was
wunderful truthful. If a poor Wenetian Gentleman, who had ewi-
dently not been waxinated, wanted his pictur painted, they painted
him accordin. and if one on ’em, like Bassandco, painted hisself, ho
I suttenly didn't flatter hisself, for it’s one of the werry huggiiest faces
| as I ever seed. Charles the 2nd must have married into a remark-
able fine family, as I s’pose as all his Beauties -was his Sister-in-Laws.
j I never heard of St. William before, but there he is a taking off his
| armer, and jolly glad he seems to git out of it. Whether Queen
. Elizbeth was a beauty without paint we none of us nose, but she
suttenly wasn’t a beauty with it, not even in her fansy dress and a
fansy night-cap to match.

I didn’t think nothink of the tapistrys, as they’ve ewidently bin
sent to the wrash and all the brite cullers washed out. but the Bed-
steds was sumthink subblime. I don’t suppose as nobody under a
prince could ever git a wink of sleep in ’em. Robert

“Two Negatives make an Affirmative.”—How so when an
Agnostic makes an affirmation ?

A “Dead-Set.”—Artificial Teeth.