Punch or The London charivari: Punch or The London charivari (2.1842)

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. 199

THE ALPHABET PARAPHRASED. BY PUNCH.

—What is an address made of?
Gammon and putt'.
And all such stuff;
That's what an address is made of.
g—"What are exchequer bills made of?
Public faith of the day,
And "a promise to pay ;"
That's what exchequer bills are made of.
C—"What's our dear Colonel made of?
Wit and whiskers so big
That they'll do for a w(h)ig ;
That's what our dear Colonel 'a made of.

D_What is the famous Duke made of?

Tough fights and hard blows,
And a very long nose ;
That's what the famous Duke *b made of.
Jj]— What is an election made of?
The feeders and fed,
The bleeders and bled ;
That's what an election's made of.
jp—What's a finance statement made of?
Old debts, a new way
Bankrupt people to pay :
That 's what a finance statement 's made of.

Q—What is state quackerv made of?
Doctor Peel—vide page
Forti/-one, I'll engage
Will tell what state quackery 's made of.

_What is a radical made of?

Vox ! vox et prsete-
Rea nihil is he ;
That's what a radical's made of.
g—What is the "sliding scale" made of?
A trip up from Peel,
Which the nation will feel ;
That 's what the sliding scale's made of.

great waist.

T—What is the treasury made <>t P
Places and pelf,
Ever)* man for himself;
That's what the treasury'a made of.
U—What is urbanity made of?

To the speaker a bow,
To back out of a row ;
That 's what urbanity's made of.
—What is voracity made of ?
A power to eat

Your whole speech, when it's meet
That 's what voracity 's made of.
—What is a wonder made of?
Nine days and a lie
That in nine days will die:
That's what a wonder 's made of.
X—What is single X made of?
The Saturday scrub
Of a brewery tub ;
That's what single X is made of.
Gr—What is a government made of"r Y—What is young Kean made of?

" Ways and means'' to imburse Everv trick in each part

A " Party's" spent purse; But " the trick of his art;"

That's what a government's made of. That's what young Kean '3 made of.

H—w'lat is honesty made of? 2J — What is the soul of zeal made of?

For himself every man An affectionate stay

To get all that he can ; For good quarterly pay,

That's what honesty 's made of That's what the soul of zeal's made of.

I—What 'a independence made of?

First trimming this way, then trimming that, ====-
The head of a tail, and the coat of a rat ;
That 8 what independence is made of.
J—What is justice for Ireland made of?

proposing an amendment

ROEBUCK'S PURGE.

Get all that you can Efficacious as the Reform Bill has proved in the promotion of bribt 17,

For Pat-r?'o< Dan ; some improvements are, it is said, in course of suggestion by the recent

That 'a what justice for Ireland 'a made of. Election Committees. It has come out in evidence, that a shameful pre-

K—What is the French king made of? ference has in many instances been shown to some honest and independent

voters over others—one receiving as much as twenty pounds for his suf-
frage, while a neighbour is palmed off with not more than three or four.
To remedy this flagrant and disgusting partiality, "Your Committees
recommend that future elections take place at the Auction Mart, and that
Mr. George Robins be appointed returning officer for the whole of the
United Kingdom ; each borough to be knocked down to the best bidder,
and the proceeds equitably divided amongst its constituency."

The excellence of this plan will soon have to be extensively tested ; the
honourable Member for Bath intending, we hear, to extend his researches
not only to Harwich, Nottingham, Penryn, Falmouth, Reading, and
That's what a minister 'a made of. Lewes, (which incompatible seats will soon become vacant,) but to the

N—What is non residence made of? whole House. Now if bribery is to unseat a Member, and if, as he has

declared, the man of Bath persevere in his exposures, his efforts will
assuredly end in a dissolution of Parliament. We wish Roebuck's purge
better success than Russell's met with ; for it is nonsense to talk of repre-
senting the people, the numerous cases of " personation " at the poll fully
proving the people are quite capable of representing one another. No ;
property is the thing to be represented ; and this will never be adequately
done till Parliament gets into the hands of the capitalists.

A will of his own,
And the heart of a stone ;
That's what the French king 'a made of.
L — What is liberty made of?
A cap very red,
On a pole sine head ;
That '3 what liberty 'b made of.
1Y£—What is a minister made of?
A weathercock mind,
To turn with the wind ;

A right which defies
All property's ties,
non residence proper is made of.
O—What is an orator made of?

Dark sayings, which lead
To a know-nothing creed;
That 's what an orator's made of.
"P—What is the parliament made of ?
Whigs, Tories, and Rads,
Who have shell'd out their brads ;
That 'a what the parliament 's made of
But patriots, what are they made of?
That cannot be shown,

INCOME TAX.

JMr. Bi:ll is always grumbling. Ministers are like the drummer-boy, flog where
they will he is never pleased. Think of his grumbling at the Income Tax,—that
beautiful tax,—which no one will pay without grieving that he has no more to pay j
b or it is not yet known ana w;th respect to which no one will have so much cause to be sorry as lie who hag

What a modern patriot's made of. nothing to pay !