DOI issue:
January to June, 1844
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16519#0133
13G
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
A POINT IN NATURAL HISTORY.
atural History may be divided into natural and
unnatural—Buffon and Pliny to wit ; nor is this
division confined to the animal kingdom—the
lives of Peter Simple and Peter the Great may
be considered natural and unnatural histories.
The mass of mankind have, in all ages, pre-
ferred the latter, just as they prefer a funeral
to a marri.ige, or a murder to a charity sermon.
Hence, in all ages, certain unfortunate animals
have had their characters most grossly mis-
represented ; and divers eccentric creatures
have assumed a place among the recognised
mammalia. Thus the respectable elk was transformed into the unicorn,
and snakes into flying dragons—whilst, in latter times, William Pitt
was transformed into the " Heaven-born minister," and George the
Fourth into the " most finished gentleman in Europe." Then again the
mermaids, centaurs, and anthropophagi of ancienttimes, are nota whitmore
originally fanciful than some pet monsters of our own enlightened days.
Take, for instance, our " Free-born Englishmen," our " Learned
Brothers," "Gallant Officers," and "Honourable Members"—not to
mention such small fry as " talented townsmen," " indefatigable public
A ZONG O' THE ZOUTH-WEST.
(Bacchanalian.)
i.
Yofr lards1 and your laidies med think themzelves viae,
A drinkun' o' Zherry and likewais Poort wine ;
But gie a good drap of Octwooaber to me,
And a vig vor Vrench varjus - whats'ever it be.
II.
A zwig3 of old ztingo it is my delight,
0' marnuns at breakvust ; wee zupper at night ;
Wee banes and bihaacon t vor dinner at noon,
When the zun is a brilun' our veaces in June.
ill.
Abroad in the vields when halmaikun'5 I goes,
A keg o'er my showlder I teaks and I throws ;
A gallun, good mizhur6, he holds purty " nigh,
And I teaks a pull at un whens'e'er I gits dry.
iv.
When rippun' is over, and carryun' is done.
We ates, and we drinks, and enjoys our good cheer
But what we loiks best is our 'lowance o' beer.
v.
The boss he drinks waater, and likewais the cow,
But none but a Christian 10 drinks beer, you'll allow :
Then off wee your liquors, my mayhats,11 I zays ;
And, "Success to the brewer," we'll drink if you plaze.
[.urn's, lords.
Varjus, verjuice.
Zwig, draught.
li;ines and bihaacon.beans
and bacon.
GLOSSARY.
5 Hatmaikun, haymaking
5 Mizhur, measure.
7 Purty, pretty.
3 Harvust whoam,harvest- \ u Mayhats, mates,
home. I 15 Plaze, please.
> Aitch, each.
,0 Christian, human being,
equivalent to Homo, Lat.
AMERICA.
By our Express Extraordinary.
pennsylvania.—repudiation.
officers," and " much respected mayors ;" and we shall have an army of" And measter to harvust-whoam 8 bids us aitcha one
imaginative creatures, which we may defy the Heathen Mythology and
antique histories to ditto, or, as the Americans say, to stump.
We shall now come to our point.
Who is Miles' boy ?
Who is Miles' boy ? Difficult—important question ! We know that
he is deeply and mysteriously connected with the turf—that he pervades at
the corner—that lie is present at Epsom—watches our Newmarket—
patronises Goodwood, and sees, Asmodeus-like, all the Provincial meetings.
But did any body ever see him ? Has any body ever shaken hands with him?
made abet with him ? stood a glass of brandy-and-water and cigars to him?
Does he travel by coach, drag, barouche, gig, tandem, dog-cart, or rail ?
Does he pad the hoof, or take a stand-ticket ? The public demand, and
the public must have information. To the editors of Sunday newspapers
we appeal—they are deep in his confidence. Let Vates, Harka,way,
Pegasus, and other classical sportsmen be examined by a Committee of
the House. Let us catch the volatile spirit of Miles' Boy and bottle
him up, as it were, in a blue book of the House of Commons.
Miles' Boy ! id est—the Boy of Miles !
Who is Miles ?
Boy synonyme with servant—Miles' Boy is then a servant : servant of .
whom ? Of Miles ^T a meetll1g 01 tne Drab-coloured men of Pennsylvania, the following
Who is Miles ? Miles is, in the Latin tongue—a soldier. Miles is, I resolution was moved by Governor Porter, and seconded by Gen. Duff
therefore, the soldier. Who is the soldier !—The Duke of Wellington. ! Green. _ _
Resolved —That we, the united band of I ennsylvanian repudiators, d>i
l»ereby utterly discard, abolish, deny, and renounce the signs and symbols
heretofore used as the " Arms " of this state, and that iu future the same
be, iu lieu thereof, a statue of Mercury, with the legeud—" Base is the
SONGS OF THE CIRCUIT. siayb who pays"
r- m ^ r>- u Carried unanimously !
r rovt Circuit to Circuit although we may roam,
Be it ever so briefless, there's none like the Home ;
A fee from the. skies p'rhaps may follow us there,
Which, seek through the Courts, is ne'er met with elsewhere.
Home, Home, sweet sweet Home,
There's none of the Circuits can equal the Home.
When out on the Home, lodgings tempt you in vain,
The railroad brings you back to your chambers again :
On the Home the expenses for posting are small;
Give me that—'tis the Circuit, the cheapest of all.
Home. Home, sweet sweet Home,
There's none of the Circuits can equal the Home.
Who is Miles' Boy ?—Lord Brougham
MAYORAL WISDOM.
We congratulate the City on the varied accomplishments of its chief
Magistrate, whose knowledge of everything in general, but anatomy in
particular, must be regarded as truly wonderful. Hervey discovered the
circulation of the blood, but Magnay has done more, for he has found out
that the human hand branches off immediately from the human heart—a
fact in anatomy which we particularly recommend to the attention of the
College of Surgeons. The following enthusiastic burst from the mouth
of Magnay, puts the question of the construction of the human frame in
an entirely new light, and shows that in the case of Royalty, at least, the
hand and heart are united in Nature's heraldry ; so that Shakspeare,
when he talks of the modern heraldry being " hands, not hearts," was
terribly mistaken. " No sooner," said Magnay, " was the Queen Dowager
made acquainted with the melancholy detail, than her Majesty's hand
was stretched out from her bountiful heart in the spirit of charity and
compassion." The above words ought to be written in letters of portable
gas on the highest tablet in the Temple of Minerva.
AIDS TO ANTI-WORKING ALGEBRAISTS.
Q. What are " Imaginary Quantities ! "
A. Penusylvaniau bonds.
Q. What is the negative sign •
A. A shake of the head.
Q. What is understood by a Radical 1
A. Anything but what he talks about iu public,
Q. What is an " Impossible Expression !"
A. To speak of "unmentionables."
Q. What does x stand for \
A To be eaten.
Q. What is a "significant digit \ "
A. The fore-finger applied to the nose.
Designs for tne Houses of Parliament.
Among the principal objects sent in for exhibition at the St. James's
Bazaar, will be found—
Specimens of panels, including the celebrated panel that obtained so
much notoriety during the trial of O'Connell.
Specimens of railing, selected from a vituperative speech of Lord
Brougham.
Printed by William Bradbury, of No 8. York Place, Stoke Newine'on. and Frederick Mullett En:i.,
of No 7 Churc'i Row Stoke Newington, both in the County of Middlesex. Printers, at th«ir
Office In Lombard Street, In 'he Precinct nf Whitefriars, in the City of London, and published by
Joseph Smith, of No. 53 St. John's Wood Terrace, Re«enfs Park, in the Parish of Marylebone. ::i
the County of Middlesex, at the Office, No 194. Strand, in the Parish of St. Clement Dunes, in <h»
County of Middlesex -SsroaDir. March 23, 1844.
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
A POINT IN NATURAL HISTORY.
atural History may be divided into natural and
unnatural—Buffon and Pliny to wit ; nor is this
division confined to the animal kingdom—the
lives of Peter Simple and Peter the Great may
be considered natural and unnatural histories.
The mass of mankind have, in all ages, pre-
ferred the latter, just as they prefer a funeral
to a marri.ige, or a murder to a charity sermon.
Hence, in all ages, certain unfortunate animals
have had their characters most grossly mis-
represented ; and divers eccentric creatures
have assumed a place among the recognised
mammalia. Thus the respectable elk was transformed into the unicorn,
and snakes into flying dragons—whilst, in latter times, William Pitt
was transformed into the " Heaven-born minister," and George the
Fourth into the " most finished gentleman in Europe." Then again the
mermaids, centaurs, and anthropophagi of ancienttimes, are nota whitmore
originally fanciful than some pet monsters of our own enlightened days.
Take, for instance, our " Free-born Englishmen," our " Learned
Brothers," "Gallant Officers," and "Honourable Members"—not to
mention such small fry as " talented townsmen," " indefatigable public
A ZONG O' THE ZOUTH-WEST.
(Bacchanalian.)
i.
Yofr lards1 and your laidies med think themzelves viae,
A drinkun' o' Zherry and likewais Poort wine ;
But gie a good drap of Octwooaber to me,
And a vig vor Vrench varjus - whats'ever it be.
II.
A zwig3 of old ztingo it is my delight,
0' marnuns at breakvust ; wee zupper at night ;
Wee banes and bihaacon t vor dinner at noon,
When the zun is a brilun' our veaces in June.
ill.
Abroad in the vields when halmaikun'5 I goes,
A keg o'er my showlder I teaks and I throws ;
A gallun, good mizhur6, he holds purty " nigh,
And I teaks a pull at un whens'e'er I gits dry.
iv.
When rippun' is over, and carryun' is done.
We ates, and we drinks, and enjoys our good cheer
But what we loiks best is our 'lowance o' beer.
v.
The boss he drinks waater, and likewais the cow,
But none but a Christian 10 drinks beer, you'll allow :
Then off wee your liquors, my mayhats,11 I zays ;
And, "Success to the brewer," we'll drink if you plaze.
[.urn's, lords.
Varjus, verjuice.
Zwig, draught.
li;ines and bihaacon.beans
and bacon.
GLOSSARY.
5 Hatmaikun, haymaking
5 Mizhur, measure.
7 Purty, pretty.
3 Harvust whoam,harvest- \ u Mayhats, mates,
home. I 15 Plaze, please.
> Aitch, each.
,0 Christian, human being,
equivalent to Homo, Lat.
AMERICA.
By our Express Extraordinary.
pennsylvania.—repudiation.
officers," and " much respected mayors ;" and we shall have an army of" And measter to harvust-whoam 8 bids us aitcha one
imaginative creatures, which we may defy the Heathen Mythology and
antique histories to ditto, or, as the Americans say, to stump.
We shall now come to our point.
Who is Miles' boy ?
Who is Miles' boy ? Difficult—important question ! We know that
he is deeply and mysteriously connected with the turf—that he pervades at
the corner—that lie is present at Epsom—watches our Newmarket—
patronises Goodwood, and sees, Asmodeus-like, all the Provincial meetings.
But did any body ever see him ? Has any body ever shaken hands with him?
made abet with him ? stood a glass of brandy-and-water and cigars to him?
Does he travel by coach, drag, barouche, gig, tandem, dog-cart, or rail ?
Does he pad the hoof, or take a stand-ticket ? The public demand, and
the public must have information. To the editors of Sunday newspapers
we appeal—they are deep in his confidence. Let Vates, Harka,way,
Pegasus, and other classical sportsmen be examined by a Committee of
the House. Let us catch the volatile spirit of Miles' Boy and bottle
him up, as it were, in a blue book of the House of Commons.
Miles' Boy ! id est—the Boy of Miles !
Who is Miles ?
Boy synonyme with servant—Miles' Boy is then a servant : servant of .
whom ? Of Miles ^T a meetll1g 01 tne Drab-coloured men of Pennsylvania, the following
Who is Miles ? Miles is, in the Latin tongue—a soldier. Miles is, I resolution was moved by Governor Porter, and seconded by Gen. Duff
therefore, the soldier. Who is the soldier !—The Duke of Wellington. ! Green. _ _
Resolved —That we, the united band of I ennsylvanian repudiators, d>i
l»ereby utterly discard, abolish, deny, and renounce the signs and symbols
heretofore used as the " Arms " of this state, and that iu future the same
be, iu lieu thereof, a statue of Mercury, with the legeud—" Base is the
SONGS OF THE CIRCUIT. siayb who pays"
r- m ^ r>- u Carried unanimously !
r rovt Circuit to Circuit although we may roam,
Be it ever so briefless, there's none like the Home ;
A fee from the. skies p'rhaps may follow us there,
Which, seek through the Courts, is ne'er met with elsewhere.
Home, Home, sweet sweet Home,
There's none of the Circuits can equal the Home.
When out on the Home, lodgings tempt you in vain,
The railroad brings you back to your chambers again :
On the Home the expenses for posting are small;
Give me that—'tis the Circuit, the cheapest of all.
Home. Home, sweet sweet Home,
There's none of the Circuits can equal the Home.
Who is Miles' Boy ?—Lord Brougham
MAYORAL WISDOM.
We congratulate the City on the varied accomplishments of its chief
Magistrate, whose knowledge of everything in general, but anatomy in
particular, must be regarded as truly wonderful. Hervey discovered the
circulation of the blood, but Magnay has done more, for he has found out
that the human hand branches off immediately from the human heart—a
fact in anatomy which we particularly recommend to the attention of the
College of Surgeons. The following enthusiastic burst from the mouth
of Magnay, puts the question of the construction of the human frame in
an entirely new light, and shows that in the case of Royalty, at least, the
hand and heart are united in Nature's heraldry ; so that Shakspeare,
when he talks of the modern heraldry being " hands, not hearts," was
terribly mistaken. " No sooner," said Magnay, " was the Queen Dowager
made acquainted with the melancholy detail, than her Majesty's hand
was stretched out from her bountiful heart in the spirit of charity and
compassion." The above words ought to be written in letters of portable
gas on the highest tablet in the Temple of Minerva.
AIDS TO ANTI-WORKING ALGEBRAISTS.
Q. What are " Imaginary Quantities ! "
A. Penusylvaniau bonds.
Q. What is the negative sign •
A. A shake of the head.
Q. What is understood by a Radical 1
A. Anything but what he talks about iu public,
Q. What is an " Impossible Expression !"
A. To speak of "unmentionables."
Q. What does x stand for \
A To be eaten.
Q. What is a "significant digit \ "
A. The fore-finger applied to the nose.
Designs for tne Houses of Parliament.
Among the principal objects sent in for exhibition at the St. James's
Bazaar, will be found—
Specimens of panels, including the celebrated panel that obtained so
much notoriety during the trial of O'Connell.
Specimens of railing, selected from a vituperative speech of Lord
Brougham.
Printed by William Bradbury, of No 8. York Place, Stoke Newine'on. and Frederick Mullett En:i.,
of No 7 Churc'i Row Stoke Newington, both in the County of Middlesex. Printers, at th«ir
Office In Lombard Street, In 'he Precinct nf Whitefriars, in the City of London, and published by
Joseph Smith, of No. 53 St. John's Wood Terrace, Re«enfs Park, in the Parish of Marylebone. ::i
the County of Middlesex, at the Office, No 194. Strand, in the Parish of St. Clement Dunes, in <h»
County of Middlesex -SsroaDir. March 23, 1844.