Punch (7.1844)

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

43

THE BUSINESS" OF PARLIAMENT.

BANKRUPTCY EXTRAORDINARY

Before Sir C. F. Williams.

At the sitting of the Court, a figure entered, looking as pale as deathi
and begged to be allowed to surrender himself as a Bankrupt.

The figure represented himself as the statue of Nelson, uow and for
some time past of Trafalgar
Square. He stated that a few
friends had been desirous of
setting him up in the neigh-
bourhood of Charing Cross,
where he had hoped to have
cut a good figure, but want
of money had for a long time
kept him down, and lie had
been completely laid upon his
back for a very considerable
period.

Sir C. F. Williams. What
do you want here I I sit here
to do justice, and if justice is

A Sunkjsk or so ago we paused, as once Wordsworth paused on
Westminster Bridge, and, smitten by the scene, fell, like the poet of
Rydal Mount, into deep, philosophic thinking. We thought of the
Abbey, and of the twopences taken at its doors ; we thought of the
Dean and Chapter, and their tenants ; of the Almonry ; of the rejected
■statue of Byron, and of the onslaught of Bacon Fitzhardinge.—
And then we turned towards the rising walls of the new Houses of
Parliament, and, thinking of their cost, asked despairingly what is
the good of them I

Yes, fellow-countrymen, we put it to you—are not Houses of Parlia-
ment, old and new, vain and useless as Egyptian cenotaphs? We
put it to the industrious and dispassionate man, who, with a patience
that must surely be a set-off to some minor sins, plods his way
through the daily debates of Parliament—we put it to him whether
the business of the country, as it is gravely called by some droll
talkers, might not be more efficiently performed by some mechanic
means than by the six hundred and fifty-eight learned individuals
who meet in February to do everything, and separate in August,

, . , ,,- i t> 11 u *i . I not most thoroughly done in

having done nothing! Really, the trick is now so old, that we sense rf ^ ;.orJ ^ ^

wonder at the courage of any set of Ministers who can repeat it. nQ f m;ne '

At the opening of the Session, how beautiful is legislative alacrity 1 j rpne ggore observed that he

Measure after measure is promised—nay, is fairly brought in—has came to surrender, and to ask

one, perhaps two readings, and is dropped for another session to be i for protection against the nu-

dropped again. A night or two since, Sir Robert Peel, with one j merous jokes that were being

of his blandest smiles, informed the House that he would let it know : made at his (the statue's) ex-

what time it had lost upon bills not to be proceeded with ; yes, he ! pense, and which were really

would count the addled eggs, and in tlit ensuing session they might j almost enough to break a heart

—poor, defrauded geese!—sit again. If Herr Dobler or the ; °^ stone-

Wizard of the North were to conjure after this fashion, the audience ! . ^' *" " 1LL1AMS- I cal1

would tear up the benches. j ?7e >01d uo P10tectKm ■£"!!?

T1 : r , T1 e n i' . • jokes. 1 can t protect mvself.

Returning to the new Houses of Parliament, we must again protest v , , r . . -

. ° . , , , T-i i i_ • , 1 have been nearly loked oil

against the money lavished upon them, r or what business, we ask, tW , - J ' • , . . . , ,. .

'p , „. , • , • , , i ' i this chair on several occasions. What is the extent of your liabilities !

has been effected in the present session that might not have been as j The figure said he rea,ly could ^ ^ A man and a , bad bee„

efficiently transacted in a sentry-box ? W heretore, then, these costly , employed, who had left no stone unturned, but he (the figure) was not
buildings for men to do nothing in I Why, indeed, should we have aware whether they had been paid for their labour.

Members of Parliament at all, when sure we are that Ma. Babbage j Sib C. F. Williams asked if there was any truth in the report that the
would construct a legislating machine, which, in the hands of Sir statue contemplated throwing himself off the pedestal, in consequence of
Robert Peel, would fully answer all the purposes of living. his awkward position.

senators ? I 1ne figure, with large drops of stucco standing in his eyes, observed

We are serious. We therefore propose that, at the next election, I that lle had uever thought of throwing himself on the public by jumping
every gentleman desirous of affixing M.P. to his name should, on his Jown ; but he admitted that, if he had had sufficient rope, he might as
election, send his proxy machine to the House of Commons, setting %vec nnise

the instrument at " Aye " and « No." as Mr. Barrage will instruct ' £!R J R VV 1L,L!AMS,- How much rope have you, then
, . . r , „. . i n r* * . . i i • ilie figure said he had got a coil ot about a yard, till some oi it was

him, on certain questions, and suffering the Ministry to take their ; cu£ ° for what reason |e did uot kll0W_fo/he was just as much tied
divisions accordingly. The result of the present session convinces | hy tlle leg now as lle had been aiways.

us that the "business of the country" will be got through quite as j Sir C. F. Williams asked if the statue had no friends who would set
well as by the present mode ; with this advantage, that the machines him up respectably !

may be put anywhere. The figure replied that his best friends were for withdrawing him alto-

_ gether from public observation. He would sooner pave the public

street than be knocked about and taken to pieces as he had been lately.

Sir C. F. Williams. I sit here as a commissioner, and I really can do
nothing.

THE CHIMES FOR THE ROYAL EXCHANGE.

A Forlorn Hope.

The Irish pa^rs announce that the " Rent" this year will be upwards
cf 30,000/. We understand that poor Louis Philippe, disappointed in
his dotations, has written to Dan to ask him "to do a bill."

WORKS RECEIVED FOR REVIEW IN " PUNCH."
Bottled Ale. Quarto. Abbott, late Hodgson and Abbott.—London.

It is stated in the papers, that Professor Taylor is composing a tune to The figure said he had heard so before ; and having thanked the Com-
be played by the bells of the Royal Exchange. We have no doubt that missioner, he was carried out by the mau and the boy who were appointed
the Professor, who liberally abuses the compositions of everybody else, in assignees under the bankruptcy,
the calm columns of the Spectator, will find himself quite at home in his
task. If the bells are to be exposed to draughts, and are liable to be moved
about by the air, the music will, of course, consist of a passage for the
wind instruments ; but if they are to be pulled by ropes, it is the stringed
instruments they will bear the nearest resemblance to.

It is to be regretted that the Committee did not place the bells in the
hands of Doctor Mendelssohn while he was in England ; and if they had
allowed him full play, he would certainly have struck out something
worthy of himself, of the City, and of the bellhanger. By-the-by, it
would not have been a bad idea to have adapted Schiller's Song of the
Bell, as a solo for the largest bell, assisted by a chorus of little ones. We
understand that the question was raised in the Committee, whether Auber
or Donizetti should not be invited over to this country for the purpose of
composing the chimes for the bells, as it was thought that, when Her
Majesty attends at the opening of the Royal Exchange, the works of a
French or Italian master would sound more gratefully in the ears of royalty.

We have dipped into this production, and are happy to be able to
express a favourable opinion of its merits. Much that comes before us
for criticism is intolerably dry, but that which we now have the pleasure
to discuss is quite of an opposite character. It appeals to the head rather
than the heart, but it possesses all the sweetness of the Meux combined
with the bluff bluntness of the Barclay. At present we speak only of the
quarto edition. When we see it complete in a cask, we shall have abetter
opportunity of judging more fully of its qualities.

The Gallic Gasconades.

The Morning Chronicle says that the reserve of the French Navy is
very considerable. The great reserve of the Navy renders Joinville's
utter want of reserve—or, in other words, his excessive impudence—f\
matter for increased astonishment.