DOI Heft:
January to June, 1845
DOI Seite / Zitierlink:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16521#0101
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. 105
that the following is the best bill of fare we could make up from the
iist before us :—
Fish.—Whale fins of British taking.
Soup.—Ox-tail, tanned, but not otherwise dressed.
GROSS MERCY!
The Birmingham Pilot states that recently, at the Worcester County
Police Court, a man named William Hanley having been brought before
Game.—Singing birds. i the bench charged with stealing four sticks out of a hedge, one of the
Meats—Beef wood, hoofs of cattle, lamb (skins), dyed or coloured,
•dressed in oil.
Entrees-—Fricasseed racoon, tiger en papillote.
Pastry.—Sweet wood.
Ohe e s e .—Bees'-wax..
Dessert.—Nuts, kernels of walnuts, and of peach stones.
Wines and Ltsueurs.—Antimony wine, senna, sanguis dr-^onis.
Ac. &c.
The a'oove is the best possible dinner that could be given un-de;
tne New Tariff.
0
GRAHAM'S DECIDED HIT.
ever unmindful of merit, we
beg heartily to congratulate
Sir James Graham on that in-
creasing unpopularity which it
seems to be bis prime object
to attain. " Ay," quoth the
saintly Mawworm, " do despise
me, I likes to be despised."
The Home Secretary, as a
statesman, apparently likes
both to be despised and dis-
liked. His ambition seems to
be to occupy every post of
obloquy. Where taunts and
invectives are flying thickest,
where the shower of abuse is
pouring heaviest, where the
tempest of exclamation is the
fiercest, there stands the valiant Graham. He is like an eccentric
actor, who affects hisses instead of plaudits, and orange-peel rather than
wreaths of flowers. Certainly his endeavours to incur odium and con-
tumely have been crowned with success. Whether as champion of the
Poor Law, the defender of its harshest clauses, or the propounder of
obnoxious measures in general, his every fresh appearance is hailed with
immense disapprobation. In denying requests, in turning a deaf ear to
petitions, and enacting all manner of parts that are unkind, he is always
shining to disadvantage. What a tremendous burst of indignation, for
instance, rewarded his display of character in the case of Mary Furley !
The mere announcement of his Medical Bill has been triumphantly
hooted, and he is now nightly received with the most enthusiastic groans
as the celebrated Letter Opener at the Post-Office. It is wonderful, how-
ever, that he should refuse to give Mr. Duncombe the information which
that gentleman desires with respect to the violation of his correspond-
ence ; for we imagine that no answer which the Right Honourable
Baronet could make, or inquiry that he could graut, would peril his well-
merited reputation as a spy. But perhaps he is content with the animosity
which he excites by his pure uncourteousness and obstinacy. Still, alto-
gether, in this matter of the Post-Office, he has made a decided hit. He
has drawn down shouts of derision, roars of complaint, thunders of con-
demnation. We anticipate for him, in bringing forward his Law of
Settlement Bill, a reception amid the most deafening yells ; and we doubt
not that he will continue to give both Parliament and the public that
extreme dissatisfaction which it is clearly his determination to afford them.
We venture to predict for him a most flaming career in the ungracious
line, terminating in a "Blaze of Triumph," to which the effulgence of
being burnt in effigy is a dull glimmer. In the meanwhile, we again give
him joy of the depth to which he has already sunk in the national dis-
favour.
sitting magistrates, the Rev. John Pearson, in the course of conversation
said,
" If they ever brought a man to him for breaking down hedges who was
only in the receipt of 7s. a week, as most labourers round his neighbour-
hood were, he would not hear the case. Some good hands in his vicinity
were doing task-work for 3s. 8d. and 3s. 10</. per week ! ! "
Oh Mil. Pearson ! What, Sir, can you, a magistrate and a clergyman,
so horribly fly in the face of your order as to countenance the notion that
Necessity has no law ? Will you allow your judgment to be perverted
by that vulgar proverb \ Necessity has plenty of law—to punish it.
Poverty, simple poverty, of itself is a crime by the law of England,
punishable by the workhouse ; and here you would make it an excuse for
theft! Because a man has only seven shillings a week, and cannot afford
to buy feul out of it, is he to commit the enormity of pulling sticks out of
a hedge 1 Would you actually permit a wretch to do damage to the
amount of two, or even three pence, merely to save himself from perching
with cold '? Have you no respect for property, Sir ? Do you think the
trifling inconvenience which a labourer undergoes in being frozen to
death, at all comparable to the sufferings of a respectable farmer, when
he finds a gap in his hedge 2 And do you mean to sanction the out-
rageous principle, that property has its duties as well as its rights ; and
to say that anybody ought to give more than three shillings and eightpence
a week for labour, when he can get it for less ?
We shall have you preaching up the duty of gratuitous relief next;
reviving the exploded notion of charily, and perhaps inculcating it as a
duty from your pulpit. What are jails for but to keep famishing people
iu order ; and what is the use of magistrates but to send transgressors,
who let cold and hunger get the better of them, to prison \ Above all,
Sir, what is the business of a clergyman but to preach self-denial to the
poor, and to prevent them from incommoding the rich \ Fie, Mr.
Pearson ! You maybe a very good sort of a man (between ourselves we
suspect you are), but your heart must be changed before you will be any-
thing like a magistrate. You have betrayed a shocking prejudice in
favour of the poor, and declared yourself capable of an act which would
be as gross an instance of mercy as we ever heard of.
Baths for the Poor.
We understand that some of the Railway Companies, desirous of
carrying out the project for supplying the poor with Baths, have had
their third-class carriages constructed so as to serve the double purpose
of a locomotive and a washing-tub. They are supplied with water from
the rain, which pours in upon all sides ; and enough to constitute a bath
is provided in a very few minutes, if the weather happens to be favourable
to the benevolent object.
golden hint to tradesmen.
A man of the world, who keeps an early-purl-house in Tottenham-
court-road, assures us he has avoided serving on juries by the following
simple method :—He lent the beadle who came with a summons five
years ago the sum of five shillings, and, strange to say, he has never
seen him since.
THE IMAGINATIVE CRISIS.
Oh ! solitude, thou wonder-working fay,
Come, nurse my feeble faucy in your arms,
Though I and thee and fancy town-pent lay,
Come, call around a world of country charms.
Let all this room, these walls, dissolve away,
And bring me Surrey's fields to take their place :
This floor be grass, and draughts as breezes play ;
Yon curtains trees, to wave in summer's face ;
My ceiling, sky ; my Water-jug, a stream ;
My bed, a bank, on which to muse and dream.
The spell is wrought : imagination swells
My sleeping-room to hills, and woods, and dells 1
I walk abroad, for nought my footsteps hinder;
And fling my arms. Oh ! mi ! I've broke the winder.
The Universal Salvage Company.
Among the other enterprises to which speculative ingenuity has turned
itself, we perceive that a Company is advertised to raise sunken or
wrecked vessels all over the world, and divide the profits. We shall be
hearing next of the Incorporated Mudlarks, or Joint-stock Dredging
Association, which the contemplated company seems in fact to be, only
on a somewhat extended principle. Directors are already appointed, and
" a manager afloat" is advertised. It is to be hoped that " Shareholders
aground" will not be the end of the speculation.
THE CATTLE EPIDEMIC.
In consequence of the alleged epidemic among the cattle, we understand
that the quarantine laws will be rigidly enforced, and that all animals
coming into London will be compelled to put out their tongues and have
their pulses felt. Each drove of oxen will be met by a medical man.at
the entrance of the metropolis, who will provide the drover with a clean
bill of health if the tongues and pulses of the brutes are found satisfactory.
All cattle appearing indisposed will have to perform quarantine in a field
in the outskirts of town, and no sheep will be admitted without a medical
certificate from the surgeon of his own parish.
Vol. 8.
4—2
that the following is the best bill of fare we could make up from the
iist before us :—
Fish.—Whale fins of British taking.
Soup.—Ox-tail, tanned, but not otherwise dressed.
GROSS MERCY!
The Birmingham Pilot states that recently, at the Worcester County
Police Court, a man named William Hanley having been brought before
Game.—Singing birds. i the bench charged with stealing four sticks out of a hedge, one of the
Meats—Beef wood, hoofs of cattle, lamb (skins), dyed or coloured,
•dressed in oil.
Entrees-—Fricasseed racoon, tiger en papillote.
Pastry.—Sweet wood.
Ohe e s e .—Bees'-wax..
Dessert.—Nuts, kernels of walnuts, and of peach stones.
Wines and Ltsueurs.—Antimony wine, senna, sanguis dr-^onis.
Ac. &c.
The a'oove is the best possible dinner that could be given un-de;
tne New Tariff.
0
GRAHAM'S DECIDED HIT.
ever unmindful of merit, we
beg heartily to congratulate
Sir James Graham on that in-
creasing unpopularity which it
seems to be bis prime object
to attain. " Ay," quoth the
saintly Mawworm, " do despise
me, I likes to be despised."
The Home Secretary, as a
statesman, apparently likes
both to be despised and dis-
liked. His ambition seems to
be to occupy every post of
obloquy. Where taunts and
invectives are flying thickest,
where the shower of abuse is
pouring heaviest, where the
tempest of exclamation is the
fiercest, there stands the valiant Graham. He is like an eccentric
actor, who affects hisses instead of plaudits, and orange-peel rather than
wreaths of flowers. Certainly his endeavours to incur odium and con-
tumely have been crowned with success. Whether as champion of the
Poor Law, the defender of its harshest clauses, or the propounder of
obnoxious measures in general, his every fresh appearance is hailed with
immense disapprobation. In denying requests, in turning a deaf ear to
petitions, and enacting all manner of parts that are unkind, he is always
shining to disadvantage. What a tremendous burst of indignation, for
instance, rewarded his display of character in the case of Mary Furley !
The mere announcement of his Medical Bill has been triumphantly
hooted, and he is now nightly received with the most enthusiastic groans
as the celebrated Letter Opener at the Post-Office. It is wonderful, how-
ever, that he should refuse to give Mr. Duncombe the information which
that gentleman desires with respect to the violation of his correspond-
ence ; for we imagine that no answer which the Right Honourable
Baronet could make, or inquiry that he could graut, would peril his well-
merited reputation as a spy. But perhaps he is content with the animosity
which he excites by his pure uncourteousness and obstinacy. Still, alto-
gether, in this matter of the Post-Office, he has made a decided hit. He
has drawn down shouts of derision, roars of complaint, thunders of con-
demnation. We anticipate for him, in bringing forward his Law of
Settlement Bill, a reception amid the most deafening yells ; and we doubt
not that he will continue to give both Parliament and the public that
extreme dissatisfaction which it is clearly his determination to afford them.
We venture to predict for him a most flaming career in the ungracious
line, terminating in a "Blaze of Triumph," to which the effulgence of
being burnt in effigy is a dull glimmer. In the meanwhile, we again give
him joy of the depth to which he has already sunk in the national dis-
favour.
sitting magistrates, the Rev. John Pearson, in the course of conversation
said,
" If they ever brought a man to him for breaking down hedges who was
only in the receipt of 7s. a week, as most labourers round his neighbour-
hood were, he would not hear the case. Some good hands in his vicinity
were doing task-work for 3s. 8d. and 3s. 10</. per week ! ! "
Oh Mil. Pearson ! What, Sir, can you, a magistrate and a clergyman,
so horribly fly in the face of your order as to countenance the notion that
Necessity has no law ? Will you allow your judgment to be perverted
by that vulgar proverb \ Necessity has plenty of law—to punish it.
Poverty, simple poverty, of itself is a crime by the law of England,
punishable by the workhouse ; and here you would make it an excuse for
theft! Because a man has only seven shillings a week, and cannot afford
to buy feul out of it, is he to commit the enormity of pulling sticks out of
a hedge 1 Would you actually permit a wretch to do damage to the
amount of two, or even three pence, merely to save himself from perching
with cold '? Have you no respect for property, Sir ? Do you think the
trifling inconvenience which a labourer undergoes in being frozen to
death, at all comparable to the sufferings of a respectable farmer, when
he finds a gap in his hedge 2 And do you mean to sanction the out-
rageous principle, that property has its duties as well as its rights ; and
to say that anybody ought to give more than three shillings and eightpence
a week for labour, when he can get it for less ?
We shall have you preaching up the duty of gratuitous relief next;
reviving the exploded notion of charily, and perhaps inculcating it as a
duty from your pulpit. What are jails for but to keep famishing people
iu order ; and what is the use of magistrates but to send transgressors,
who let cold and hunger get the better of them, to prison \ Above all,
Sir, what is the business of a clergyman but to preach self-denial to the
poor, and to prevent them from incommoding the rich \ Fie, Mr.
Pearson ! You maybe a very good sort of a man (between ourselves we
suspect you are), but your heart must be changed before you will be any-
thing like a magistrate. You have betrayed a shocking prejudice in
favour of the poor, and declared yourself capable of an act which would
be as gross an instance of mercy as we ever heard of.
Baths for the Poor.
We understand that some of the Railway Companies, desirous of
carrying out the project for supplying the poor with Baths, have had
their third-class carriages constructed so as to serve the double purpose
of a locomotive and a washing-tub. They are supplied with water from
the rain, which pours in upon all sides ; and enough to constitute a bath
is provided in a very few minutes, if the weather happens to be favourable
to the benevolent object.
golden hint to tradesmen.
A man of the world, who keeps an early-purl-house in Tottenham-
court-road, assures us he has avoided serving on juries by the following
simple method :—He lent the beadle who came with a summons five
years ago the sum of five shillings, and, strange to say, he has never
seen him since.
THE IMAGINATIVE CRISIS.
Oh ! solitude, thou wonder-working fay,
Come, nurse my feeble faucy in your arms,
Though I and thee and fancy town-pent lay,
Come, call around a world of country charms.
Let all this room, these walls, dissolve away,
And bring me Surrey's fields to take their place :
This floor be grass, and draughts as breezes play ;
Yon curtains trees, to wave in summer's face ;
My ceiling, sky ; my Water-jug, a stream ;
My bed, a bank, on which to muse and dream.
The spell is wrought : imagination swells
My sleeping-room to hills, and woods, and dells 1
I walk abroad, for nought my footsteps hinder;
And fling my arms. Oh ! mi ! I've broke the winder.
The Universal Salvage Company.
Among the other enterprises to which speculative ingenuity has turned
itself, we perceive that a Company is advertised to raise sunken or
wrecked vessels all over the world, and divide the profits. We shall be
hearing next of the Incorporated Mudlarks, or Joint-stock Dredging
Association, which the contemplated company seems in fact to be, only
on a somewhat extended principle. Directors are already appointed, and
" a manager afloat" is advertised. It is to be hoped that " Shareholders
aground" will not be the end of the speculation.
THE CATTLE EPIDEMIC.
In consequence of the alleged epidemic among the cattle, we understand
that the quarantine laws will be rigidly enforced, and that all animals
coming into London will be compelled to put out their tongues and have
their pulses felt. Each drove of oxen will be met by a medical man.at
the entrance of the metropolis, who will provide the drover with a clean
bill of health if the tongues and pulses of the brutes are found satisfactory.
All cattle appearing indisposed will have to perform quarantine in a field
in the outskirts of town, and no sheep will be admitted without a medical
certificate from the surgeon of his own parish.
Vol. 8.
4—2