DOI Heft:
July to December, 1845
DOI Seite / Zitierlink:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16541#0245
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
M1
MISS VIALONY AND FATHER LUKE. the political me. Ferguson
Patrick Street, Cork, Nov. 20.
[TSS BIDDY MALONY presents
her compliments to Punch,
and begs to submit to him
the following statement :—
My grandmother dyipg,
and the winther comin on
(she was the daughther to the
MuLLiGiN,of Castle Mulligan,
and cousin by the mother's
side, who was a Fitzsimpns,
of Clonakilty, to the Right
Honourable the Earl of
Ballywhacket), I thought I
could do nothing betther with
the legacy which she left me
(Heaven rest her sowl!) than
purchase me a new muff and
tippet. I saw a sweet sable
shuit at Mr. Fitzgibbon's, in
Great George's Street—and
(as nothing looks better with mourning, or shuits my complexion better)
I purchased muff, boa, and cuffs, complete. A more elegant set of furs
there is not in all Cork : as for Mrs. Kinaily's pelisse that she brags of
these two years, I believe they're dyed—I know her hair is : but this,
please not to mention.
" Sunday last was a sweet cold morning, and I went to eight-o'clock
mass with my dear Amalia Brodigan, who was dying with envy of the
tippet and muff. There wasn't a lady in chapel but I believe was in a
fury with poor me—a sad frame of mind, Mr. Punch, to go to Chapel in !
" Father Luke no sooner catches sight of my new sables than he
frowns on me as if they didn't become me : and 0, Sir ! fancy my horror
when he stands up and exhorts the congregation from the altar, looking
steadfastly at me all the while.
" ' Women of Ireland :' says he ; 1 women descended from those three
iundthred virgins whom the bloody Saxon Cromwell slew at Wexford ;
women who inhabit a land whose vallies are the greenest, whose rivers are
the clearest, whose mountains are the highest in the worrrld. What sacri-
fices are you prepared to make to that bleeding, that beautiful counthree ?
The wicked Saxon has blighted the potato-crop, and rejoices in the pros-
pect of the national famine. The agonies of our phildren feast his heart
with hellish joy: do they awaken no sympathies in yours ? Are
you not prepared to do everything to rescue your starving country-
men % Our Sublime Liberator permits it: enjoins it. That Great
Philanthropist cannot subscribe himself, for he is poor—but he calls
" Allow me," says the Duke to Peel,
" To introduce a man whose zeal
Was e'en too warm for India's sphere."
" What, Ellenborough ! " Peel replied,
" I'm sorry he should be denied—
But, 'pon my word, he can't lodge here.'
THE ARMY.
Morality is finding its way even to the Horse Guards. The military
authorities are no longer to angle with lies for recruits : the gudgeons are
upon you," his" children^to make everylaaCTffiee. "Father of "our coun- j to be caught after another fashion. The Recruiting Sergeant is no longer
thry, shall not your daughthers obey you V We were all affected to ! to be the Clown in the bloody pantomime of Glory. No : for the Bath
tears of rage against the Saxon—whom, except yourself, dear Punchy, \ Journal informs us—
"The militia are to have a most efficient staff in each county: one-third of the
main body of the militia to be embodied for three years' exercise, at the same time
allowing the men to volunteer to the line, with certain regulations to subaltern officers
to extend their services also."
and perhaps Captain Smith, of the 190th (with whom I danced at Mallow
Race-ball), and who is a very nice young man, I detest cordially—and we
protested we were ready to make any sacrifice for our suffering country-
men. Then, Mr. Punch, came the cruel cruel attack on poor me !
" ' Any sacrifice !' roars Father Luke. ' Can you talk of sacrifices,
who have spent fifteen guineas on a muff and tippet ?—you, who are
decking yourself with fine raiment when your country is in mourning ?
—you, who are flaunting in gorgeous apparel when Ireland is naked and
cold ?' Every eye in the chapel turned towards me : the people round
about moved away from me and left me alone ; and as for that odious
Miss Brodigan, she gave a grin of triumph, much more becoming a fiend
This "allowing the men to volunteer to the line" is only an extension
of Mrs. Bond's benevolent principle of "allowing" the ducky, ducky,
ducky, to come and be killed ! However, the Journal assures us that
this measure will " put a stop to the demoralising scenes witnessed in all
public-houses to catch a recruit." We wonder what the Iron Duke says
to this. According to his own showing, what has morality to do with
glory ? For is it not among the Duke's recorded apophthegms that " men
who go for soldiers should not be nice about religion " ! The Duke's
than a Christian woman and cousin of my own, which she is, the ^ f f fa A of Martvrs is_an army with more drums than prayer-
crodigans of Brodigan Town being connected with the Loonys of!" _,__
Drumelubber—first cousins of ours, as everybody knows.
" Well, Sir, I left the chapel in anguish of mind, as you may fancy ; and
-have had all Cork calling upon me since to condole with me. But I want RAILWAY INTELLIGENCE,
to know—was it quite fair for his Reverence to attack me 1 I paid my
thirty-shilling note to the Tribute ; every blessed Sabbath I put my shil-
ling in the plate : I may have my charities, too, at home ; but there is no
call to publish them; and I think it's cruel entirely that I should be for-
bidden to purchase in the shops, and that Father Luke will not let me
and my poor boa and tippet alone : I, who subscribed to the silver tea-
service, t»o, which the Ladies gave him. I warrant you he didn't cry out
at the extravagance of that.
" Please, dear Mr. Punch, take my case in hand, and defend your
constant reader, the poor defenceless innocent.
"Biddy Malony."
Deadly Poisons.
The French have been distributing Crosses of the Legion of Honour to
Chinese Mandarins. The English introduce opium into China, but the
French prefer importing Crosses of the Legion of Honour. They evi-
books.
Our own snug little suburban Railway, the "Kensington and Shepherd's
Bush," has given notice of an extension, and we have no doubt it would
run to any lengths if Parliament would grant its permission. We cannot
conceive what point this eccentric little Line can possibly be driving at.
There is some talk of its spreading out its little arms towards Little
Chelsea, in which case it will perhaps embrace Pimlico. We understand
that the concern has lately set up a horse and cart to carry out Clay
Cross coals at eighteen-pence a hundred, which are brought from Shep-
herd's Bush once a day in the first class carriages.
A Kine "Jeames."
We learn from Palermo that the King of the Two Sicilies had a
tremendous " struggle of politeness" with the Emperor of Russia, to
yield " the place of honour " in the Royal carriage. At length, " the con-
test ended by the King taking the footman's place behind the vehicle."
dentlf rely on their old proverb: " II n'y a rien qui tue comme le ridicule." ' There have been kings who could not be better placed.
M1
MISS VIALONY AND FATHER LUKE. the political me. Ferguson
Patrick Street, Cork, Nov. 20.
[TSS BIDDY MALONY presents
her compliments to Punch,
and begs to submit to him
the following statement :—
My grandmother dyipg,
and the winther comin on
(she was the daughther to the
MuLLiGiN,of Castle Mulligan,
and cousin by the mother's
side, who was a Fitzsimpns,
of Clonakilty, to the Right
Honourable the Earl of
Ballywhacket), I thought I
could do nothing betther with
the legacy which she left me
(Heaven rest her sowl!) than
purchase me a new muff and
tippet. I saw a sweet sable
shuit at Mr. Fitzgibbon's, in
Great George's Street—and
(as nothing looks better with mourning, or shuits my complexion better)
I purchased muff, boa, and cuffs, complete. A more elegant set of furs
there is not in all Cork : as for Mrs. Kinaily's pelisse that she brags of
these two years, I believe they're dyed—I know her hair is : but this,
please not to mention.
" Sunday last was a sweet cold morning, and I went to eight-o'clock
mass with my dear Amalia Brodigan, who was dying with envy of the
tippet and muff. There wasn't a lady in chapel but I believe was in a
fury with poor me—a sad frame of mind, Mr. Punch, to go to Chapel in !
" Father Luke no sooner catches sight of my new sables than he
frowns on me as if they didn't become me : and 0, Sir ! fancy my horror
when he stands up and exhorts the congregation from the altar, looking
steadfastly at me all the while.
" ' Women of Ireland :' says he ; 1 women descended from those three
iundthred virgins whom the bloody Saxon Cromwell slew at Wexford ;
women who inhabit a land whose vallies are the greenest, whose rivers are
the clearest, whose mountains are the highest in the worrrld. What sacri-
fices are you prepared to make to that bleeding, that beautiful counthree ?
The wicked Saxon has blighted the potato-crop, and rejoices in the pros-
pect of the national famine. The agonies of our phildren feast his heart
with hellish joy: do they awaken no sympathies in yours ? Are
you not prepared to do everything to rescue your starving country-
men % Our Sublime Liberator permits it: enjoins it. That Great
Philanthropist cannot subscribe himself, for he is poor—but he calls
" Allow me," says the Duke to Peel,
" To introduce a man whose zeal
Was e'en too warm for India's sphere."
" What, Ellenborough ! " Peel replied,
" I'm sorry he should be denied—
But, 'pon my word, he can't lodge here.'
THE ARMY.
Morality is finding its way even to the Horse Guards. The military
authorities are no longer to angle with lies for recruits : the gudgeons are
upon you," his" children^to make everylaaCTffiee. "Father of "our coun- j to be caught after another fashion. The Recruiting Sergeant is no longer
thry, shall not your daughthers obey you V We were all affected to ! to be the Clown in the bloody pantomime of Glory. No : for the Bath
tears of rage against the Saxon—whom, except yourself, dear Punchy, \ Journal informs us—
"The militia are to have a most efficient staff in each county: one-third of the
main body of the militia to be embodied for three years' exercise, at the same time
allowing the men to volunteer to the line, with certain regulations to subaltern officers
to extend their services also."
and perhaps Captain Smith, of the 190th (with whom I danced at Mallow
Race-ball), and who is a very nice young man, I detest cordially—and we
protested we were ready to make any sacrifice for our suffering country-
men. Then, Mr. Punch, came the cruel cruel attack on poor me !
" ' Any sacrifice !' roars Father Luke. ' Can you talk of sacrifices,
who have spent fifteen guineas on a muff and tippet ?—you, who are
decking yourself with fine raiment when your country is in mourning ?
—you, who are flaunting in gorgeous apparel when Ireland is naked and
cold ?' Every eye in the chapel turned towards me : the people round
about moved away from me and left me alone ; and as for that odious
Miss Brodigan, she gave a grin of triumph, much more becoming a fiend
This "allowing the men to volunteer to the line" is only an extension
of Mrs. Bond's benevolent principle of "allowing" the ducky, ducky,
ducky, to come and be killed ! However, the Journal assures us that
this measure will " put a stop to the demoralising scenes witnessed in all
public-houses to catch a recruit." We wonder what the Iron Duke says
to this. According to his own showing, what has morality to do with
glory ? For is it not among the Duke's recorded apophthegms that " men
who go for soldiers should not be nice about religion " ! The Duke's
than a Christian woman and cousin of my own, which she is, the ^ f f fa A of Martvrs is_an army with more drums than prayer-
crodigans of Brodigan Town being connected with the Loonys of!" _,__
Drumelubber—first cousins of ours, as everybody knows.
" Well, Sir, I left the chapel in anguish of mind, as you may fancy ; and
-have had all Cork calling upon me since to condole with me. But I want RAILWAY INTELLIGENCE,
to know—was it quite fair for his Reverence to attack me 1 I paid my
thirty-shilling note to the Tribute ; every blessed Sabbath I put my shil-
ling in the plate : I may have my charities, too, at home ; but there is no
call to publish them; and I think it's cruel entirely that I should be for-
bidden to purchase in the shops, and that Father Luke will not let me
and my poor boa and tippet alone : I, who subscribed to the silver tea-
service, t»o, which the Ladies gave him. I warrant you he didn't cry out
at the extravagance of that.
" Please, dear Mr. Punch, take my case in hand, and defend your
constant reader, the poor defenceless innocent.
"Biddy Malony."
Deadly Poisons.
The French have been distributing Crosses of the Legion of Honour to
Chinese Mandarins. The English introduce opium into China, but the
French prefer importing Crosses of the Legion of Honour. They evi-
books.
Our own snug little suburban Railway, the "Kensington and Shepherd's
Bush," has given notice of an extension, and we have no doubt it would
run to any lengths if Parliament would grant its permission. We cannot
conceive what point this eccentric little Line can possibly be driving at.
There is some talk of its spreading out its little arms towards Little
Chelsea, in which case it will perhaps embrace Pimlico. We understand
that the concern has lately set up a horse and cart to carry out Clay
Cross coals at eighteen-pence a hundred, which are brought from Shep-
herd's Bush once a day in the first class carriages.
A Kine "Jeames."
We learn from Palermo that the King of the Two Sicilies had a
tremendous " struggle of politeness" with the Emperor of Russia, to
yield " the place of honour " in the Royal carriage. At length, " the con-
test ended by the King taking the footman's place behind the vehicle."
dentlf rely on their old proverb: " II n'y a rien qui tue comme le ridicule." ' There have been kings who could not be better placed.