DOI issue:
January to June, 1851
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16607#0089
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. 81
PERSECUTION AND PUNCH IN 3 851.
(a Page frorn Posterity's Decline and Fall, &c.)
hould England, in the course of centuries,
yielding to the encroachments of Popery,
sink in the scale of rations, and ulti-
mately disappear from among the Powers
of the Earth, the future historian of the
Decline and Fall of the British Empire,
writing in Au'ytitJja, may perhaps, with
reference to the existing controversy,
compose a few paragraphs of this sort:—
"The first attempt of the See of
Rome to reduce the haughty ^
and obstinate English to
subjection beneath the papal Hierarchy,
yoke, provoked a furious
and sanguinary resistance. The pious
zeal of ecclesiastical writers has de-
stroyed the partial, and perhaps untrust-
worthy, records of heretical adversaries;
but, for the conjectural inferences of
historical criticism, we may substitute
the unimpeachable testimony of infallible
churchmanship. If any credit is due to
the declarations of the most eminent
prelates, a persecution, un- _
paralleled in extent and ^ersecu-
cruelty since the atrocities
of Diocletian, was set on foot against
the Archbishop and Bishops of the
restored hierarchy. Popes, Cardinals,
and Monks, after being paraded with
ignominy through the streets of London
during the day, were burnt, at night,
amid the acclamations of the multitude;
and the flames, which excited the suffer-
ings of the martyrs, illuminated the
revels of a frantic populace. The addresses of the Irish Clergy to St. Nicholas Wiseman,
coupled with the language of the Saint himself, by their frequent allusions to the gT# NlCH0_
fires of persecution, attest the nature of the torments which he had endured tor i,A8.
the faith. Yet, after having suffered barbarities more. savage than ^any that ffissuffer_
could have revealed the weakness or tested the fortitude ot the victim ot ing3_
the North American Indian, we find this holy confessor in so short a space ot
time performing the duties of his pastoral office, that the supposition of a miracle £™*™racu-
is absolutely necessary to reconcile a fact of church history with possibility in
the nature of things.
" Foremost among the persecutors of St. Nicholas and his holy associates, was a tyrant,
whom the popular will and favour had invested with almost absolute power. Ihe The tyrant
name of this merciless and inhuman despot was Punch. ™^is monster, in punch.
character and disposition, appears to have been a combination of Richard the hig peraonal
Third with the eighth Henrt: ; and a physical resemblance corresponded to the appearance,
mental similitude ; for to the corpulence of the latter of these tyrants was added, _
in his person, the deformity of the former. From his magnificent residence, which dese-
crated the holy precincts of St. Bride's Court, he was accustomed to sally forth periodically,
armed with privileged impunity, and a huge cudgel with which he belaboured Persecutes
his victims, who were for the most part dignitaries of the only orthodox Church. the uew Mer.
The ingenuity of malice seems to have been exhausted by the variety of the archy.
tortures which he not only devised, but inflicted. Ecclesiastics most venerable
for their station, if not for their virtues, were unsparingly lashed, and caustic,
applied to the most sensitive places, added poignancy to anguish. Some ot the His barban-
martyrs were slowly roasted by a process which lasted in several instances for
months; others were exposed on the gibbet, or in the pillory; and many slaughtered by
being completely cut to pieces; yet shortly afterwards resuming both their integrity and
their avocations, afforded at once examples of extraordinary cruelty, and supernatural inter-
position. Retribution, however, at length overtook the persecutor. Having
incautiously penetrated into a remote part of Ireland, he was seized upon by ^tpumsb"
the indignant faithful; and having been solemnly condemned by the Synod of men '
Castlebar, expiated, if the expression can be allowed, his accumulated atrocities in the
avenging flames."
Such is the account which unerring Tradition has handed down to us, of the renowned
Punch ; yet the perversity of scepticism has not failed to insinuate that the Historic
whole history is a hyperbolical allegory; that the deformity of the tyrant was doubts con-
only the grotesqueness or a puppet, and that his cruelties were but the sarcasms cerning him.
if a biting humourist.
The Greatest Legal Reformer.
There is no doubt that the present Loed Chancellor is the greatest legal reformer
of the age. He seems to be so thoroughly disgusted with the goings on in Chancery,
that he is resolved there shall be no goings on at all, if he can help it. He appears to
be of opinion that the proceedings in Chancery required to have a stop put to them,—and
there is a regular stop put to them, at last.
" THE REASON WHY."
Sin James Graham, in his magnificent defence
of free trade in corn, called certain bellies for his
witnesses. He called
The ploughboy, whose belly is the fuller—since
unprotected by kadiord*—and Giles Scroggins,
the ploughboy, " knows the reason why."
Sandy, the shepherd, on the distant and barren
hills of Scotland, sees a larger mess of porridge;
and his natural acuteness, quickened by his belly,
" knows the reason why."
John Brown, the Lancashire weaver, with no
decrease in wages, counts a larger number of
quartern loaves, and he—and his wife, be sure
of it—" know the reason why."
And Cornwallis Smith, full private of the
204th Royal Skullbones, returned from foreign
service, has a cheaper, a larger, and a fuller
mess; and, with the instinctive conviction of the
stomach, Cornwallis Smith " knows the reason
why."
And the leaf of this knowledge is from the
Free Bread Tree — from the great Banyan,
spreading over England, that Disraeli and Co.
would cut down—no, not cut down; but would
quietly ''bark."
But then great are the equivalents offered by
Disraeli. He says to the ploughboy—" Here,
Giles, look here, young chawbacon. Some
capital sugar; English sugar—patriotic sugar—
grown from beet-root; no nigger's-blood in it;
But the honest sweat of honest British plough-
men. And here's'bacco for you • none of your
outlandish Virginny; but real Kentish bird's-
eye. Do you hear, Giles ? Do you attend,
Sandy ? Do you see what I mean, John
Brown? Are you up to what I say, Corn-
wallis ? English beet-root sugar, and Kent
bird's-eye."
And the ploughboy—the shepherd—the weaver
—the soldier ask for cheap bread, and the Member
for Bucks offers English tobacco. Give up your
mess of foreign wheat, and smoke the calumet
of Kentish bird's-eye.
PROTECTION FOR HOUSEWIVES.
" Dear Mr. Punch,
"Packing up some things in the news-
paper one day last week, I happened to notice a
speech made in Parliament, by Mr. Disraeli ;
and in it a passage so interesting that I thought
I would cut it out s.nd send it to you. Here
it is :—
"' The average price of meat in 1848 was 4s. 5J<i That
was the average of the temporary depression. Now, the
average price of meat in 1850 (taking it from the official
return from Smithfield) was 3s. 8£<2. (Loud cheers from
the Protectionists.)'
" Most gentlemen talking politics, I have ob-
served, ridicule the Protectionists, and say they
know nothing about political economy. Well;
now, / think there is great economy in paying
'6s. $$d., instead of 4s. §\d. for meat; and I must
say, I think it was very natural and sensible of
the Protectionists to cheer at the idea of such
a saving, and I shall try all I can to persuade
John to vote for their side at the next election.
" Your sincere admirer,
"Martha Notable.
" P.S. I suppose wiat Protectionists want is
to protect us from being imposed upon, and to
make everything as reasonable as they can. There
can be no nonsense in that. M. N."
A Job for Jullien.
What is Jullien about, now that the Saints
of the dark ages are so much the rage in Belgra-
vian society, that he does not immediately set
to work, and compose a " St. Yitus's Polka ? "
PERSECUTION AND PUNCH IN 3 851.
(a Page frorn Posterity's Decline and Fall, &c.)
hould England, in the course of centuries,
yielding to the encroachments of Popery,
sink in the scale of rations, and ulti-
mately disappear from among the Powers
of the Earth, the future historian of the
Decline and Fall of the British Empire,
writing in Au'ytitJja, may perhaps, with
reference to the existing controversy,
compose a few paragraphs of this sort:—
"The first attempt of the See of
Rome to reduce the haughty ^
and obstinate English to
subjection beneath the papal Hierarchy,
yoke, provoked a furious
and sanguinary resistance. The pious
zeal of ecclesiastical writers has de-
stroyed the partial, and perhaps untrust-
worthy, records of heretical adversaries;
but, for the conjectural inferences of
historical criticism, we may substitute
the unimpeachable testimony of infallible
churchmanship. If any credit is due to
the declarations of the most eminent
prelates, a persecution, un- _
paralleled in extent and ^ersecu-
cruelty since the atrocities
of Diocletian, was set on foot against
the Archbishop and Bishops of the
restored hierarchy. Popes, Cardinals,
and Monks, after being paraded with
ignominy through the streets of London
during the day, were burnt, at night,
amid the acclamations of the multitude;
and the flames, which excited the suffer-
ings of the martyrs, illuminated the
revels of a frantic populace. The addresses of the Irish Clergy to St. Nicholas Wiseman,
coupled with the language of the Saint himself, by their frequent allusions to the gT# NlCH0_
fires of persecution, attest the nature of the torments which he had endured tor i,A8.
the faith. Yet, after having suffered barbarities more. savage than ^any that ffissuffer_
could have revealed the weakness or tested the fortitude ot the victim ot ing3_
the North American Indian, we find this holy confessor in so short a space ot
time performing the duties of his pastoral office, that the supposition of a miracle £™*™racu-
is absolutely necessary to reconcile a fact of church history with possibility in
the nature of things.
" Foremost among the persecutors of St. Nicholas and his holy associates, was a tyrant,
whom the popular will and favour had invested with almost absolute power. Ihe The tyrant
name of this merciless and inhuman despot was Punch. ™^is monster, in punch.
character and disposition, appears to have been a combination of Richard the hig peraonal
Third with the eighth Henrt: ; and a physical resemblance corresponded to the appearance,
mental similitude ; for to the corpulence of the latter of these tyrants was added, _
in his person, the deformity of the former. From his magnificent residence, which dese-
crated the holy precincts of St. Bride's Court, he was accustomed to sally forth periodically,
armed with privileged impunity, and a huge cudgel with which he belaboured Persecutes
his victims, who were for the most part dignitaries of the only orthodox Church. the uew Mer.
The ingenuity of malice seems to have been exhausted by the variety of the archy.
tortures which he not only devised, but inflicted. Ecclesiastics most venerable
for their station, if not for their virtues, were unsparingly lashed, and caustic,
applied to the most sensitive places, added poignancy to anguish. Some ot the His barban-
martyrs were slowly roasted by a process which lasted in several instances for
months; others were exposed on the gibbet, or in the pillory; and many slaughtered by
being completely cut to pieces; yet shortly afterwards resuming both their integrity and
their avocations, afforded at once examples of extraordinary cruelty, and supernatural inter-
position. Retribution, however, at length overtook the persecutor. Having
incautiously penetrated into a remote part of Ireland, he was seized upon by ^tpumsb"
the indignant faithful; and having been solemnly condemned by the Synod of men '
Castlebar, expiated, if the expression can be allowed, his accumulated atrocities in the
avenging flames."
Such is the account which unerring Tradition has handed down to us, of the renowned
Punch ; yet the perversity of scepticism has not failed to insinuate that the Historic
whole history is a hyperbolical allegory; that the deformity of the tyrant was doubts con-
only the grotesqueness or a puppet, and that his cruelties were but the sarcasms cerning him.
if a biting humourist.
The Greatest Legal Reformer.
There is no doubt that the present Loed Chancellor is the greatest legal reformer
of the age. He seems to be so thoroughly disgusted with the goings on in Chancery,
that he is resolved there shall be no goings on at all, if he can help it. He appears to
be of opinion that the proceedings in Chancery required to have a stop put to them,—and
there is a regular stop put to them, at last.
" THE REASON WHY."
Sin James Graham, in his magnificent defence
of free trade in corn, called certain bellies for his
witnesses. He called
The ploughboy, whose belly is the fuller—since
unprotected by kadiord*—and Giles Scroggins,
the ploughboy, " knows the reason why."
Sandy, the shepherd, on the distant and barren
hills of Scotland, sees a larger mess of porridge;
and his natural acuteness, quickened by his belly,
" knows the reason why."
John Brown, the Lancashire weaver, with no
decrease in wages, counts a larger number of
quartern loaves, and he—and his wife, be sure
of it—" know the reason why."
And Cornwallis Smith, full private of the
204th Royal Skullbones, returned from foreign
service, has a cheaper, a larger, and a fuller
mess; and, with the instinctive conviction of the
stomach, Cornwallis Smith " knows the reason
why."
And the leaf of this knowledge is from the
Free Bread Tree — from the great Banyan,
spreading over England, that Disraeli and Co.
would cut down—no, not cut down; but would
quietly ''bark."
But then great are the equivalents offered by
Disraeli. He says to the ploughboy—" Here,
Giles, look here, young chawbacon. Some
capital sugar; English sugar—patriotic sugar—
grown from beet-root; no nigger's-blood in it;
But the honest sweat of honest British plough-
men. And here's'bacco for you • none of your
outlandish Virginny; but real Kentish bird's-
eye. Do you hear, Giles ? Do you attend,
Sandy ? Do you see what I mean, John
Brown? Are you up to what I say, Corn-
wallis ? English beet-root sugar, and Kent
bird's-eye."
And the ploughboy—the shepherd—the weaver
—the soldier ask for cheap bread, and the Member
for Bucks offers English tobacco. Give up your
mess of foreign wheat, and smoke the calumet
of Kentish bird's-eye.
PROTECTION FOR HOUSEWIVES.
" Dear Mr. Punch,
"Packing up some things in the news-
paper one day last week, I happened to notice a
speech made in Parliament, by Mr. Disraeli ;
and in it a passage so interesting that I thought
I would cut it out s.nd send it to you. Here
it is :—
"' The average price of meat in 1848 was 4s. 5J<i That
was the average of the temporary depression. Now, the
average price of meat in 1850 (taking it from the official
return from Smithfield) was 3s. 8£<2. (Loud cheers from
the Protectionists.)'
" Most gentlemen talking politics, I have ob-
served, ridicule the Protectionists, and say they
know nothing about political economy. Well;
now, / think there is great economy in paying
'6s. $$d., instead of 4s. §\d. for meat; and I must
say, I think it was very natural and sensible of
the Protectionists to cheer at the idea of such
a saving, and I shall try all I can to persuade
John to vote for their side at the next election.
" Your sincere admirer,
"Martha Notable.
" P.S. I suppose wiat Protectionists want is
to protect us from being imposed upon, and to
make everything as reasonable as they can. There
can be no nonsense in that. M. N."
A Job for Jullien.
What is Jullien about, now that the Saints
of the dark ages are so much the rage in Belgra-
vian society, that he does not immediately set
to work, and compose a " St. Yitus's Polka ? "