DOI issue:
Volume XXVI
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16613#0156
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
14 y
I
A KIND WORD FOR THE CZAR.
ome flowers, as we all
know, were strewn on
the grave of Nero—it
is supposed by some
solitary friend, in whose
affections even that ty-
rant held a place. More
probably the act was
performed by some
small boy in a spirit of
opposition. To this
motive only can be
ascribed the sympathy,
with the Emperor op
Russia, exhibited in a
recent debate, by the
Marquis op Granby.
According to t\\eMorn-
ing Chronicle—
“The Marquis of Granby-
said it was a matter of re-
gret to him to observe the
tone and language that had
been used by Members of
the Government and others,
who were no doubt consci- !
entiously opposed to the ag-
gression of Russia. That
aggression might be wrong,
as well as dangerous to the
interests of this country;
but it would he more becom-
ing this great nation if it
entered into the argument
of the facts more in the '
spirit of the Honourable Member for Manchester than some of the speakers that night.”
It is difficult to say whether it is more extraordinary that the Marquis op
Granby should feel for the injured name of Nicholas, or that he should coincide
in any sentiment with Mr. Bright.
“ He objected to the tone of these speeches, a tone which the Emperor on his part did not employ.
The Emperor gave us full credit for our desire to maintain the peace of the world, a credit which we,
on the other hand, denied to him. [Laughter."
We have given the Czar a great deal too much credit for a desire to maintain
the peace of the world. Eor that desire he has had twelve months’ credit, which
is twelve months too much. We gave him more credit, we are sure, than the Mar-
quis of Granby would expect from his tailor.
“He knew that there were gentlemen who believed that, do what the Emperor would, or say
what he might, there was an underhand meaning very different from that which appeared ; and he
said that if they entered on the discussion of these blue books and correspondences in that spirit they
could not arrive at the truth.”
Eew gentlemen doubt the meaning of what the Emperor of Russia does. There
was no equivocation in the Sinope massacre. But one signification can be attached
to his assertions when delivered from the cannon’s mouth. The doubt is as to the
sense of what proceeds from his own. Eor instance, when he calls himself a gen-
tleman, it is clear that he means something else; and a correct though vulgar
answer to his pretence to be such, would consist in telling him that he is another.
“ He thought the Honourable Member who had stigmatised Russia as having acted fraudulently
would regret having used such an expression of that power.”
THE DOMESTIC CAMPAIGN.
Alas ! must we have no Reform
On account of this pestilent wa.
Can we only sit quaking, and list for the storm
Of battle, to roar from afar ?
Because of the Russians and Turks,
Must there be an indefinite stop
To the whole of our local and national works ?
In fact, must we all shut up shop ?
The season that now is at hand
The winter of trade must it be.
Because Erance and England have taken tneir stand,
In arms, that the world may be free P
As far as appearances go,
_ There’s somewhat more pleasant to hope ;
No doubt we shall all due anxiety show,
But let us not uselessly mope.
The opera, with enterprise bold.
As usual has opened its doors.
And the New Philharmonic, as well as the Old,
Together with Concerts by scores.
Still Albert Smith makes the ascent
Of Mont Blanc—attracting a shoal—
No matter what eyes on the Bear are intent,
Now climbing Ambition’s long pole.
His carpet-bag Woodin unpacks.
His sketch-book displays every night,
Albeit that Mussulmans strive with Cossacks,
And Britons and Muscovites fight.
Ventriloquist, Wizard, and Bard
Who pours the extemporised lay,
Mr. Jacobs contrives, without any regard
To Russia, to conjure away.
Wyld’s Great Globe continues to draw
In spite of the mad autocrat.
Who, scorning all justice, unheeding ail law,
The original covets of that.
The Art-Exhibitions will not
This summer be closed, by the fears
And excitement occasioned by our having got
With Muscovy’s Czar by the ears.
And well it is these things are so,
Because, of the enemy’s thumps.
That one would be far the most mischievous blow
That struck us all into the dumps.
As heartless their object ne’er blame
Amusement who strive to impart;
At a time such as this our most sensible aim
Is to keep one another in heart.
i
Whv, any more than having applied the same expression to the conduct of any
“ gentleman ” that has been sent to the House of Correction during the past week ?
One should rather rejoice in having employed so temperate, yet just, an expression
when one’s indignation might, have hurried one into the use of coarse substantives
and adjectives, and even participles of alow and profane description.
“Then came the Vienna note, which the Emperor, who was called ‘the disturber of the public
peace,’ was willing to accept. What Russia wished for was the Protectorate of the Greek
Church. Was there in that demand anything that we should really be afraid of? Was there
anything in that demand that showed she wished to take Constantinople ? ”
Of course there was not anything in the demand that showed any such wish-
Good care was taken that there should be nothing of the sort. Really such a
question is unworthy of the name of the noble Marquis. So simple an inter-
rogatory may be regarded as the sign of the Green Man rather than that of the
Marquis of Granby.
When, for merely destroying a single life by violence, an individual is called a
number of names,_ of which the_ mildest is assassin, ihe question which Lord
Granby may be invited to consider is, whether to describe the Czar as “the
disturber of the public peace,” is not to speak of him with a gentleness so extreme
as to be absurd.
Fiddlededum and Fiddlededee.
There are two Philharmonics, the Old and the New. The one is almost
always lull, the other generally empty. Musicians, when they wish to distinguish
the former from its y9ung rival, make a musical point of calling it t he “ Don’t Philhar-
monic. ihe allusion to the emptiness of the old institution is understood at
once.
EEMALE EMPLOYMENT.
“ Sir,
“In these days of starving economy, when
governesses and needlewomen are so shamefully underpaid,
may I take the liberty of suggesting a new opening for
female employment, which I think would he attended with
the most beneficial and lucrative results. It is well known
the many annoyances that bachelors are almost daily ex-
posed to in connection with their linen. Legal students,
perhaps, suffer the most in these trying emergencies, as there
never is any one—not even a laundress—on the premises,
to whom they can appeal for assistance. Now my sugges-
tion is this :—I think that if a number of women were to
go through the Inns of Court every morning with the
charitable object of sewing, stitching, and mending all
imperfect garments, they would realise a very large income.
Their visits should take place between nine and ten
o’clock in the morning before the day’s studies began,
and they might give notice of their approach by crying
out, ‘ Any buttons want sewing P—any shirts to mend ? ’ I
am confident the returns would be very large, and that the
new business would be an immense boon to all distressed
bachelors. How often has the temper of the whole day
been ruffled by a shirt minus a button !
“ Yours, Sir, in all seriousness,
“An Old Bachelor.”
\
l
14 y
I
A KIND WORD FOR THE CZAR.
ome flowers, as we all
know, were strewn on
the grave of Nero—it
is supposed by some
solitary friend, in whose
affections even that ty-
rant held a place. More
probably the act was
performed by some
small boy in a spirit of
opposition. To this
motive only can be
ascribed the sympathy,
with the Emperor op
Russia, exhibited in a
recent debate, by the
Marquis op Granby.
According to t\\eMorn-
ing Chronicle—
“The Marquis of Granby-
said it was a matter of re-
gret to him to observe the
tone and language that had
been used by Members of
the Government and others,
who were no doubt consci- !
entiously opposed to the ag-
gression of Russia. That
aggression might be wrong,
as well as dangerous to the
interests of this country;
but it would he more becom-
ing this great nation if it
entered into the argument
of the facts more in the '
spirit of the Honourable Member for Manchester than some of the speakers that night.”
It is difficult to say whether it is more extraordinary that the Marquis op
Granby should feel for the injured name of Nicholas, or that he should coincide
in any sentiment with Mr. Bright.
“ He objected to the tone of these speeches, a tone which the Emperor on his part did not employ.
The Emperor gave us full credit for our desire to maintain the peace of the world, a credit which we,
on the other hand, denied to him. [Laughter."
We have given the Czar a great deal too much credit for a desire to maintain
the peace of the world. Eor that desire he has had twelve months’ credit, which
is twelve months too much. We gave him more credit, we are sure, than the Mar-
quis of Granby would expect from his tailor.
“He knew that there were gentlemen who believed that, do what the Emperor would, or say
what he might, there was an underhand meaning very different from that which appeared ; and he
said that if they entered on the discussion of these blue books and correspondences in that spirit they
could not arrive at the truth.”
Eew gentlemen doubt the meaning of what the Emperor of Russia does. There
was no equivocation in the Sinope massacre. But one signification can be attached
to his assertions when delivered from the cannon’s mouth. The doubt is as to the
sense of what proceeds from his own. Eor instance, when he calls himself a gen-
tleman, it is clear that he means something else; and a correct though vulgar
answer to his pretence to be such, would consist in telling him that he is another.
“ He thought the Honourable Member who had stigmatised Russia as having acted fraudulently
would regret having used such an expression of that power.”
THE DOMESTIC CAMPAIGN.
Alas ! must we have no Reform
On account of this pestilent wa.
Can we only sit quaking, and list for the storm
Of battle, to roar from afar ?
Because of the Russians and Turks,
Must there be an indefinite stop
To the whole of our local and national works ?
In fact, must we all shut up shop ?
The season that now is at hand
The winter of trade must it be.
Because Erance and England have taken tneir stand,
In arms, that the world may be free P
As far as appearances go,
_ There’s somewhat more pleasant to hope ;
No doubt we shall all due anxiety show,
But let us not uselessly mope.
The opera, with enterprise bold.
As usual has opened its doors.
And the New Philharmonic, as well as the Old,
Together with Concerts by scores.
Still Albert Smith makes the ascent
Of Mont Blanc—attracting a shoal—
No matter what eyes on the Bear are intent,
Now climbing Ambition’s long pole.
His carpet-bag Woodin unpacks.
His sketch-book displays every night,
Albeit that Mussulmans strive with Cossacks,
And Britons and Muscovites fight.
Ventriloquist, Wizard, and Bard
Who pours the extemporised lay,
Mr. Jacobs contrives, without any regard
To Russia, to conjure away.
Wyld’s Great Globe continues to draw
In spite of the mad autocrat.
Who, scorning all justice, unheeding ail law,
The original covets of that.
The Art-Exhibitions will not
This summer be closed, by the fears
And excitement occasioned by our having got
With Muscovy’s Czar by the ears.
And well it is these things are so,
Because, of the enemy’s thumps.
That one would be far the most mischievous blow
That struck us all into the dumps.
As heartless their object ne’er blame
Amusement who strive to impart;
At a time such as this our most sensible aim
Is to keep one another in heart.
i
Whv, any more than having applied the same expression to the conduct of any
“ gentleman ” that has been sent to the House of Correction during the past week ?
One should rather rejoice in having employed so temperate, yet just, an expression
when one’s indignation might, have hurried one into the use of coarse substantives
and adjectives, and even participles of alow and profane description.
“Then came the Vienna note, which the Emperor, who was called ‘the disturber of the public
peace,’ was willing to accept. What Russia wished for was the Protectorate of the Greek
Church. Was there in that demand anything that we should really be afraid of? Was there
anything in that demand that showed she wished to take Constantinople ? ”
Of course there was not anything in the demand that showed any such wish-
Good care was taken that there should be nothing of the sort. Really such a
question is unworthy of the name of the noble Marquis. So simple an inter-
rogatory may be regarded as the sign of the Green Man rather than that of the
Marquis of Granby.
When, for merely destroying a single life by violence, an individual is called a
number of names,_ of which the_ mildest is assassin, ihe question which Lord
Granby may be invited to consider is, whether to describe the Czar as “the
disturber of the public peace,” is not to speak of him with a gentleness so extreme
as to be absurd.
Fiddlededum and Fiddlededee.
There are two Philharmonics, the Old and the New. The one is almost
always lull, the other generally empty. Musicians, when they wish to distinguish
the former from its y9ung rival, make a musical point of calling it t he “ Don’t Philhar-
monic. ihe allusion to the emptiness of the old institution is understood at
once.
EEMALE EMPLOYMENT.
“ Sir,
“In these days of starving economy, when
governesses and needlewomen are so shamefully underpaid,
may I take the liberty of suggesting a new opening for
female employment, which I think would he attended with
the most beneficial and lucrative results. It is well known
the many annoyances that bachelors are almost daily ex-
posed to in connection with their linen. Legal students,
perhaps, suffer the most in these trying emergencies, as there
never is any one—not even a laundress—on the premises,
to whom they can appeal for assistance. Now my sugges-
tion is this :—I think that if a number of women were to
go through the Inns of Court every morning with the
charitable object of sewing, stitching, and mending all
imperfect garments, they would realise a very large income.
Their visits should take place between nine and ten
o’clock in the morning before the day’s studies began,
and they might give notice of their approach by crying
out, ‘ Any buttons want sewing P—any shirts to mend ? ’ I
am confident the returns would be very large, and that the
new business would be an immense boon to all distressed
bachelors. How often has the temper of the whole day
been ruffled by a shirt minus a button !
“ Yours, Sir, in all seriousness,
“An Old Bachelor.”
\
l