DOI issue:
August 25, 1855
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16616#0088
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
[August 25, 1S55.
AQUATICS.
Small Boy. " Now, then ! All together ! "
THE DANGERS OF PLAYING AT WAR.
"War is not a thing to be trifled with, and its horrors are much too
real to be the legitimate subjects of burlesque, or any other kind of
mockery. The nearer the imitation approaches to the real thing', where
an imitation of war is concerned, the more distasteful it must be to all
persons of common sense, and common humanity. The mania for con-
verting the horrors of war into a subject of amusement for the
million, has received a somewhat sad lesson in the accident that, has
lately happened at Cremorne Gardens ; where, for the benefit of some
charity, there was to be a mock representation of the Battle of Inker-
mann. There was all the usual pride, pomp, arid circumstance of
in-glorious (theatrical) war; and, to give "reality" to the business, a
dreadful reality it turned out, some of the Guards were " allowed by the
authorities" to take part in the spectacle. Of course, the only real
element in the business was incompatible with all the shams of which
it was made up; and, amidst the sham fortifications, the sham defences,
the sham barricades, and all ihe other gim-crack apDurtenances of a
sham-fight, the real soldiers tumbled to the ground fiom a height of
some twenty feet with terrible reality.
Of course, when it is too late, everybody is exclaiming against the
impropriety of allowing the Guards to take a part in these caricature
copies of the horrors of war ; in which everything is purposely made to
yield, fromthe pasteboard ramparts, to theshilling-a-night supernumerary
Bussians. The sort of enthusiasm that is excited among the soldiers,
by an imitation attack on an imitation enemy, in the teeth of imitation
fire from imitation batteries, is not likely to be of much service in the
hour of real battle, when there is no stage-direc'or ordering the enemy
where to fall back, and leading on the British troops to the point
where, by previous arrangement, they are destined to be victorious. A
panorama of Sebastopol is all well enough, and a pictorial represen-
tation of the siege may be made a matter of interest; but an attempt to
show the actual storming of a place with real troops, must always be
a melancholy, and, indeed, a feeble spectacle. Nothing can be better
than the picture now being exhibited at the Surrey Zoological Gardens ;
but the moment the action begins, and the firing of the guns
sets the ducks quacking in Ihe lake, while the pkuingof the band
drowns, on the whole, the occasionally heard cries of—"Now Dick, set
fire to that tow," " Beady there with them red-lights ? " " Off with them
fireworks," and other stage-directions of a kindred character, the whole
affair becomes ridiculous.
Considering the trouble and anxiety in the public mind on the subject
of the Siege of Sebastopol, it is a ghastly mockery to be told that it is
being taken triumphantly every night, and sometimes twice a-day (for
there have been occasiona'ly morning performances), at the Surrey
Zoological Gardens. Let the directors of places of public amusement
confine themselves to legitimate subjects of entertainment, _ of which
there are quite enough, without resorting to dismal travesties of the
War in the Crimea.
A Commissioner of Good Works.
We have much pleasure in observine-, that whereas the Marylebone
Electors have given Sir Benjamin Hall a seat in Parliament, that
exemplary minister has added 200 seats to those in the Begent's Park.
Sir BcNJamin acts as if he thought that one good turn deserves 200.
It also gratifies us to remark, that the Chief Commissioner of Parks and
Public Buildings intends to throw Kew Gardens open from morning
to night; thereby rendering those who may visit them as happy as the
day is long. .
Thames' Prizes.
The Lord Mayor last week attended at the Twankey Tea Gardens,
to distribute the prizes to the victors of the Thames' Begatta. It was
quite right that a contest of strength and skill, tried upon the river,
should be rewarded by prizes supplied by old Father Thames himself,
duly represented by Lord Mayor Moon: the prizes were three—
namely, a puppy-dog, a kitten, and a mouse in excellent preservation,
having been fished up below Ba'tersea, and duly stuffed by an ex-
perienced hand. A. microscope and a bucket of Thames' water will be
contended for next week.
[August 25, 1S55.
AQUATICS.
Small Boy. " Now, then ! All together ! "
THE DANGERS OF PLAYING AT WAR.
"War is not a thing to be trifled with, and its horrors are much too
real to be the legitimate subjects of burlesque, or any other kind of
mockery. The nearer the imitation approaches to the real thing', where
an imitation of war is concerned, the more distasteful it must be to all
persons of common sense, and common humanity. The mania for con-
verting the horrors of war into a subject of amusement for the
million, has received a somewhat sad lesson in the accident that, has
lately happened at Cremorne Gardens ; where, for the benefit of some
charity, there was to be a mock representation of the Battle of Inker-
mann. There was all the usual pride, pomp, arid circumstance of
in-glorious (theatrical) war; and, to give "reality" to the business, a
dreadful reality it turned out, some of the Guards were " allowed by the
authorities" to take part in the spectacle. Of course, the only real
element in the business was incompatible with all the shams of which
it was made up; and, amidst the sham fortifications, the sham defences,
the sham barricades, and all ihe other gim-crack apDurtenances of a
sham-fight, the real soldiers tumbled to the ground fiom a height of
some twenty feet with terrible reality.
Of course, when it is too late, everybody is exclaiming against the
impropriety of allowing the Guards to take a part in these caricature
copies of the horrors of war ; in which everything is purposely made to
yield, fromthe pasteboard ramparts, to theshilling-a-night supernumerary
Bussians. The sort of enthusiasm that is excited among the soldiers,
by an imitation attack on an imitation enemy, in the teeth of imitation
fire from imitation batteries, is not likely to be of much service in the
hour of real battle, when there is no stage-direc'or ordering the enemy
where to fall back, and leading on the British troops to the point
where, by previous arrangement, they are destined to be victorious. A
panorama of Sebastopol is all well enough, and a pictorial represen-
tation of the siege may be made a matter of interest; but an attempt to
show the actual storming of a place with real troops, must always be
a melancholy, and, indeed, a feeble spectacle. Nothing can be better
than the picture now being exhibited at the Surrey Zoological Gardens ;
but the moment the action begins, and the firing of the guns
sets the ducks quacking in Ihe lake, while the pkuingof the band
drowns, on the whole, the occasionally heard cries of—"Now Dick, set
fire to that tow," " Beady there with them red-lights ? " " Off with them
fireworks," and other stage-directions of a kindred character, the whole
affair becomes ridiculous.
Considering the trouble and anxiety in the public mind on the subject
of the Siege of Sebastopol, it is a ghastly mockery to be told that it is
being taken triumphantly every night, and sometimes twice a-day (for
there have been occasiona'ly morning performances), at the Surrey
Zoological Gardens. Let the directors of places of public amusement
confine themselves to legitimate subjects of entertainment, _ of which
there are quite enough, without resorting to dismal travesties of the
War in the Crimea.
A Commissioner of Good Works.
We have much pleasure in observine-, that whereas the Marylebone
Electors have given Sir Benjamin Hall a seat in Parliament, that
exemplary minister has added 200 seats to those in the Begent's Park.
Sir BcNJamin acts as if he thought that one good turn deserves 200.
It also gratifies us to remark, that the Chief Commissioner of Parks and
Public Buildings intends to throw Kew Gardens open from morning
to night; thereby rendering those who may visit them as happy as the
day is long. .
Thames' Prizes.
The Lord Mayor last week attended at the Twankey Tea Gardens,
to distribute the prizes to the victors of the Thames' Begatta. It was
quite right that a contest of strength and skill, tried upon the river,
should be rewarded by prizes supplied by old Father Thames himself,
duly represented by Lord Mayor Moon: the prizes were three—
namely, a puppy-dog, a kitten, and a mouse in excellent preservation,
having been fished up below Ba'tersea, and duly stuffed by an ex-
perienced hand. A. microscope and a bucket of Thames' water will be
contended for next week.