DOI issue:
August 11, 1855
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16616#0065
August 11, 1855.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
A LIKELY CASE.
Fiery Instructor to trembling Pupil. " Now, Sir ! Come ! I know you ! Don't
attempt to bully me, SlB—It won't succeed, I can tell you ! "
BY THE MARGIN OF THAMES' DIRTY WATERS.
By the margin of Thames' dirty waters,
Ur—ah—oh—ugh !
Lived a youth who was sick night and day.
For the stencu in such pestilent quarters,
Ur—ah—oh—ugh !
Was never one moment away.
When abroad none more healthy than he,
But at home none more sickly could be,
Will you cleanse this vile river, 1 pray ? "
Ur—ah—oh—ugh !
The authorities only aould say—
" Ur— ah— oh—ugh ! It's dreadful to-day.
Ur—ah—oh—ugh! Ur—ah—oh—ugh!" was all they
could say.
By the margin of Thames' dirty waters,
Ur—ah—oh—ugh !
At the close of a hot summer's day :
As he lay in his pestilent quarters,
Ur—ah—oh—ugh !
This youth was heard faintly to say :—
" 1 'm ill, as you plainly can see,
This river is poison to me.
Oh ! I'd rather be drown'd in its tide,
Ur—ah—oh—ugh !
Than of typhus die off at its side.
Ur—ah—oh—ugh ! Ur—ah—oh—ugh ! I '11 jump in its
bed!
Ugh.! Ugh!—No. I'll move from my lodgings instead.
Ur—ah—oh—ugh ! No. I dou't fancy its bed.
Ugh ! Ugh ! "—So he changed his apartments instead.
Sea-Side Fashions.
The "Uglies" worn by the youDg ladies at Rarosgate,
are of a larger size than ever this year. They are so large
that it is almost impossible for the young beauty that is shut
up inside to see anything without taking her bonnet off. It
is said that certain modest mammas have organised this
monstrous fashion purposely, in order to prevent their
daughters seeing the strange sights that not unfrequently
take place on the beach of a morning whilst the bathing-
machines are out.
PUNCH'S ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.
Mr. Punch requests that due attention may be paid to Me. Pellatt's
regard for the arts, for literature, and for education.
The Partnership Amendment Bill is another victim to Parliamentary
My 30. Monday. Lord Brougham expressed his opinion that, after roe rarmersmp amenamen r>m is amnuer vioum w x an amemar.
all, some progress had been made in Law Reform this Session. As j ne*l«?t- B.was ^JedA froum Massacre of the Innocents, to fall
Mr. Punch intends to "take stock " as soon as the Session is over, he more ignominionsly to-day by the hand ot Bouverie.
will probably have something to say upon this head. Tuesday. The Lords sent the Metropolis Management Bill through
In the Commons the Limited Liabilities Bill proceeded, and, later in ' Committee with laudable speed.
the week, and after some more hindrances from the monied men, who In the Commons, the Chancellor of the Exchequer said that in
are horribly disgusted that a poor man should presume to lend, instead Ins budget he had taken a trifling margin ot ltiree and a hall Millions
of confining himself to his own sphere, and, with due humility, borrow- I beyond the then estimated expenditure of the year, but he should want
ing of themselves, was passed
It was stated by Government that we are to have an Italian Legion,
and Mr. Punch trusts that every street organist in London will be in-
stantly pressed into it—and, if he might add a suggestion to the Com-
mander of the Forces, he would recommend that such part of the
Legion be allowed the utmost opportunity of distinguishing itself under
the very hottest fire.
Lord Palmerston announced that the Session must terminate about
the 14th or 15th. It is stated that Her Majesty will not prorogue in
person, being, it is believed, too much ashamed of the conduct of her
Parliament to meet it without a rebuke, which her kindliness of nature
disposes her to withhold. The Foreign Secretary, by reason of his
superior acquaintance with the French tongue, is to accompany his
Sovereign to Paris; and it is to be hoped that before his Lordship
returns, he will endeavour to procure a translation of the word
" solidairement," which, in the Turkish Loan debate, baffled the united
lingual skill of the British House of Commons, and which in Nugent's
French Dictionary, for the Use of Schools and Young Persons, Edit. xvi.
1830, p. 303, is explained to mean " wholly."
A great deal of money was voted in Committee of Supply. In the
course of the debates on these grants, that ridiculous person, Mr.
Apsley Pellatt, the China-shop man, offered three pieces of oppo
a great deal more. He could not, however, tell them how much until
they had granted the supplementary sums for which he had already asked.
Let them mind one tiling at a time. The intimation quieted the
House, and they went on dutifully voting money till midnight.
The new Sale of Beer Act went through Committee. The pious
Marquis of Blandford, and the sapient Mr. Frewen opposed it,
but were beaten by 62 to 10. The bill was passed on Thursday.
Wednesday. Nothing particular. Mr. Otway tried to cut off the
salary of the gentleman who travels to buy pictures for the nation, but
this little bit of cheese-paring injustice was scouted by the House.
Thursday. Lord Redesdale advised the Government to buy up the
ground between Downing Street and George Street. It was naturally
supposed that his Lordship was about to recommend the erection of a
" Casino " thereon, for Peeresses and their friends, in order to relieve
the Chamber of Peers from the name which he was good enough to
affix to it, when some of the wives and daughters of the noblemen ot
England found an interesting debate more attractive than an opera.
But the courteous Lord only wanted to build public offices on the
ground in question.
In the Commons, the very improper pension to Lord George Paget
was defended on the weakest and most contradictory grounds. _ To do
Lord George justice, he seems to have done his best to deprive his
sition, which may as well be, mentioned, because they show what kind j friends of an excuse for giving him the money, but they almost forced
of an article Pellatt is. He wistitd to disallow the item of £10,000 j it, upon him
for pictures for the National Gallery, the item of £12,000 for the accom-
modation of 200,000 additional books for the British Museum, and the
miserable item of £250 for incidental expenses of the Belfast College.
Great sums of money were voted for Commissariat and Ordnance
expenses, and £15,000 for the erection of a Museum at Kensington
Gore.
i
A LIKELY CASE.
Fiery Instructor to trembling Pupil. " Now, Sir ! Come ! I know you ! Don't
attempt to bully me, SlB—It won't succeed, I can tell you ! "
BY THE MARGIN OF THAMES' DIRTY WATERS.
By the margin of Thames' dirty waters,
Ur—ah—oh—ugh !
Lived a youth who was sick night and day.
For the stencu in such pestilent quarters,
Ur—ah—oh—ugh !
Was never one moment away.
When abroad none more healthy than he,
But at home none more sickly could be,
Will you cleanse this vile river, 1 pray ? "
Ur—ah—oh—ugh !
The authorities only aould say—
" Ur— ah— oh—ugh ! It's dreadful to-day.
Ur—ah—oh—ugh! Ur—ah—oh—ugh!" was all they
could say.
By the margin of Thames' dirty waters,
Ur—ah—oh—ugh !
At the close of a hot summer's day :
As he lay in his pestilent quarters,
Ur—ah—oh—ugh !
This youth was heard faintly to say :—
" 1 'm ill, as you plainly can see,
This river is poison to me.
Oh ! I'd rather be drown'd in its tide,
Ur—ah—oh—ugh !
Than of typhus die off at its side.
Ur—ah—oh—ugh ! Ur—ah—oh—ugh ! I '11 jump in its
bed!
Ugh.! Ugh!—No. I'll move from my lodgings instead.
Ur—ah—oh—ugh ! No. I dou't fancy its bed.
Ugh ! Ugh ! "—So he changed his apartments instead.
Sea-Side Fashions.
The "Uglies" worn by the youDg ladies at Rarosgate,
are of a larger size than ever this year. They are so large
that it is almost impossible for the young beauty that is shut
up inside to see anything without taking her bonnet off. It
is said that certain modest mammas have organised this
monstrous fashion purposely, in order to prevent their
daughters seeing the strange sights that not unfrequently
take place on the beach of a morning whilst the bathing-
machines are out.
PUNCH'S ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.
Mr. Punch requests that due attention may be paid to Me. Pellatt's
regard for the arts, for literature, and for education.
The Partnership Amendment Bill is another victim to Parliamentary
My 30. Monday. Lord Brougham expressed his opinion that, after roe rarmersmp amenamen r>m is amnuer vioum w x an amemar.
all, some progress had been made in Law Reform this Session. As j ne*l«?t- B.was ^JedA froum Massacre of the Innocents, to fall
Mr. Punch intends to "take stock " as soon as the Session is over, he more ignominionsly to-day by the hand ot Bouverie.
will probably have something to say upon this head. Tuesday. The Lords sent the Metropolis Management Bill through
In the Commons the Limited Liabilities Bill proceeded, and, later in ' Committee with laudable speed.
the week, and after some more hindrances from the monied men, who In the Commons, the Chancellor of the Exchequer said that in
are horribly disgusted that a poor man should presume to lend, instead Ins budget he had taken a trifling margin ot ltiree and a hall Millions
of confining himself to his own sphere, and, with due humility, borrow- I beyond the then estimated expenditure of the year, but he should want
ing of themselves, was passed
It was stated by Government that we are to have an Italian Legion,
and Mr. Punch trusts that every street organist in London will be in-
stantly pressed into it—and, if he might add a suggestion to the Com-
mander of the Forces, he would recommend that such part of the
Legion be allowed the utmost opportunity of distinguishing itself under
the very hottest fire.
Lord Palmerston announced that the Session must terminate about
the 14th or 15th. It is stated that Her Majesty will not prorogue in
person, being, it is believed, too much ashamed of the conduct of her
Parliament to meet it without a rebuke, which her kindliness of nature
disposes her to withhold. The Foreign Secretary, by reason of his
superior acquaintance with the French tongue, is to accompany his
Sovereign to Paris; and it is to be hoped that before his Lordship
returns, he will endeavour to procure a translation of the word
" solidairement," which, in the Turkish Loan debate, baffled the united
lingual skill of the British House of Commons, and which in Nugent's
French Dictionary, for the Use of Schools and Young Persons, Edit. xvi.
1830, p. 303, is explained to mean " wholly."
A great deal of money was voted in Committee of Supply. In the
course of the debates on these grants, that ridiculous person, Mr.
Apsley Pellatt, the China-shop man, offered three pieces of oppo
a great deal more. He could not, however, tell them how much until
they had granted the supplementary sums for which he had already asked.
Let them mind one tiling at a time. The intimation quieted the
House, and they went on dutifully voting money till midnight.
The new Sale of Beer Act went through Committee. The pious
Marquis of Blandford, and the sapient Mr. Frewen opposed it,
but were beaten by 62 to 10. The bill was passed on Thursday.
Wednesday. Nothing particular. Mr. Otway tried to cut off the
salary of the gentleman who travels to buy pictures for the nation, but
this little bit of cheese-paring injustice was scouted by the House.
Thursday. Lord Redesdale advised the Government to buy up the
ground between Downing Street and George Street. It was naturally
supposed that his Lordship was about to recommend the erection of a
" Casino " thereon, for Peeresses and their friends, in order to relieve
the Chamber of Peers from the name which he was good enough to
affix to it, when some of the wives and daughters of the noblemen ot
England found an interesting debate more attractive than an opera.
But the courteous Lord only wanted to build public offices on the
ground in question.
In the Commons, the very improper pension to Lord George Paget
was defended on the weakest and most contradictory grounds. _ To do
Lord George justice, he seems to have done his best to deprive his
sition, which may as well be, mentioned, because they show what kind j friends of an excuse for giving him the money, but they almost forced
of an article Pellatt is. He wistitd to disallow the item of £10,000 j it, upon him
for pictures for the National Gallery, the item of £12,000 for the accom-
modation of 200,000 additional books for the British Museum, and the
miserable item of £250 for incidental expenses of the Belfast College.
Great sums of money were voted for Commissariat and Ordnance
expenses, and £15,000 for the erection of a Museum at Kensington
Gore.
i